Fighting (53 page)

Looking
into his stormy blue eyes, feeling his anguish like it was my own and knowing
that my fight was justified because it was for
him
, I felt thoroughly
vindicated.  I knew that every single choice I made in that warehouse led us to
this very moment, alive and together, and I wouldn't change a thing.  I finally
breathed easier and could honestly say that I had no regrets.

I
cupped Ethan's face to say something I'd never said before in my life.  "Make
love to me," I said softly.

He
pushed himself up and gave me a long, deep, lingering kiss.  His lips were firm
but gentle as they thoroughly explored mine and he feathered his fingers over
my breasts and sides.  My hands were sliding up and down his sides as he
positioned at my opening. 

And
then he broke free and muttered, "Condom."

He
glanced at the bag that was still at the door and I said, "I'll get
it."

He
looked back down at me and I pushed at his good shoulder to roll him onto his
side so I could leave the bed.  I fully regretted covering myself up in the
shower because I knew he didn't like it, so I took my time walking to the bag
and back in apology, which was nerve-racking but in a good way.  I pilfered
through the bag as his eyes soaked up the image of my completely naked body
hovering over him beside of the bed.  I found his stash and scattered a few
packets on the bedside table.  His eyes lit and he grinned at the sight of more
than one condom. 

I
crawled back on the bed and rolled onto my back.  He immediately covered my
body with his and blindly reached for a condom without breaking our stare.  He
handed the packet to me and I opened it and handed him the condom.  This is
what
real
teamwork looks like.  He put it on and leaned down onto his
forearms to give me a satisfyingly rough, heavy kiss.  He drew back two inches
to run his nose along mine as he pushed inside. 

My
eyes closed and I pushed the crown of my head into my pillow and breathed,
"Yes."

He
pressed his face into my neck and his hand closed around my hip as he held
perfectly still.  He pulled his face away to float over mine so close that I
felt his lips barely touch mine and I nodded my head for him to move but he
didn't, so I opened my eyes.  And then he moved.  I cried out weakly and my
hands clenched around his rotating shoulder blades as he set a slow, sultry
pace.  His hand swept down my body from my breast to my ass.  His fingers
pulsed around it and my breathing hitched because I
loved
that.  I
lifted my head to his and captured his lips with mine.  I pulled him down with
me as I relaxed my neck and pushed my hands down to pulse against
his
ass.  He grinned against my lips but then quickly remolded them between mine
and tugged seductively.

I
slid my hands up his long torso and around to his front to wedge between our
chests as my body yielded to his demands.  His pace quickened steadily and we
pulled apart enough that our lips were touching but not kissing.  I felt his
breath warm on my face as his hand lifted my ass.  I put both feet flat to the
bed and raised my hips slightly like he was asking me to do. 

I
grasped his face with my palms so that my fingers fanned out against his neck
and we moved in sync.  He skimmed his lips down my neck and across my collar
bone before he dipped his head to quickly lick my nipple and return to my
neck.  He slid his lips behind my ear and stayed there, breathing against my
skin there and kissing or licking occasionally.

I
wrapped my arms securely around his neck and his hand left my ass to slide
around to my clit.  His fingers stroked me as I got closer and felt like I was
losing my breath.  His movement became faster and after only a few of his most
powerful thrusts, I came.  Hard.  I called his name desperately and his hand
left me to help support his weight as he pumped through the duration of my
orgasm and into his, growling my name into my mouth.

He
dropped his body onto mine, rolled to his back and slid both of his hands down
my back to cup my ass.  My knees were still pinned against his hips and I
didn't move so that I was still curled around him and completely connected to
him, content to stay like that, even sleep like that.  We caught our breath and
I soaked up his warmth and strength.

"Alex,"
he murmured when we were breathing normally.

"What?"
I asked, my voice muffled by his shoulder.

"I
thought I lost you today," he said somberly.

I
peeled my eyes open and palmed the mattress by his shoulders to raise my chest
and face away from him.  His eyes were anguished, boring into mine.  His hands
caressed my face and hair, holding my damp waves back so we could see each
other clearly.

"I
was sure that you were alive because you're a fighter, but when I got to that
back room and saw my jacket in a heap on the floor surrounded by blood stains
and you nowhere in sight, I lost my mind.  I just . . . I beat the
fuck
out
of Fletcher and he still didn't give you up and I thought you would die alone
and scared, without me," he said, sounding completely heartbroken and
barely speaking above a whisper.  "I felt so helpless."

I
knew
exactly
how that felt and I hated that he did now, too.  My head
tilted to the side and I tried
really
fucking hard not to cry, but my
lips quivered and a few stubborn tears soaked my lashes and fell onto his
cheeks.  I scowled and ran my hand over his face to clean them away and he fit
his palms around my jaw to run his thumbs under my eyes.  I sat up and he
followed after me, scooting us back against the headboard.  I wrapped my legs
around his backside so we were huddled around each other on the bed.

"I'd
never been that scared before in my life," he admitted.

"I'm
sorry," I whispered.

"I'm
sorry I wasn't there sooner," he said, caressing a hand down my cheek and
neck. 

"You're
always too hard on yourself," I mildly admonished him.  "Especially
when it comes to my safety."

"Wanting
to save you was selfish," he said.  "Because without you . . .
"  He shook his head and scowled.  "I need you.  And all I could
think about was what he was doing to you and how much pain I was going to
inflict on him before killing him," he rumbled. 

"I
thought he took you from me, too," I said, my voice cracking.  "I
refused to believe him at first but I still felt paralyzed with fear.  Because
Ethan, you're strong, but you're not invincible."

"I
know," he said softly.  His hands slid down to my neck and his eyes
trailed the tears on my cheeks before he wiped them away.  "I know,"
he repeated.  "You have no idea how relieved I was to see that you saved
yourself."

"But
you did save me," I said.  "I couldn't feel anything.  Not anger or
fear or grief.  I only felt cold and disconnected and I'm pretty sure I became
the villain for a minute.  But when we finally made it to each other, you
brought me back to life," I insisted.  I rested my forehead against his
shoulder and closed my eyes.  "And then you got shot.  I've never been so
scared before in my life."

His
hands slid around my back and he leaned his cheek against my head. 
"Baby," he crooned soothingly. 

I
pulled back and wiped at my face.  "Seriously though," I said in a
stronger voice.  "It's not going to fly with me if you beat yourself up
over shit that you have no control over when it comes to me."

His
eyes warmed on mine and he twirled one of my curls around his finger.  "I
can't help it.  I want to protect you."

"You're
lucky I
let
you protect me," I said, grinning a little.

He
smiled.  "I know.  Not every guy can brag to his friends about his
girlfriend kicking major ass and taking names."

"I'm
so glad you're mine," I chuckled softly.  "You know, not every girl
can say that her boyfriend is an actual hero.  Hey, how do you feel about
wearing colorful tights?"

He
frowned.  "No one gets to see my junk except you.  Not even the outline of
it."

I
laughed out loud and wrapped my arms around his neck.  "Now that's what I
like to hear."

He
suddenly climbed to his knees and I tightened my legs around his hips in
surprise.  He fell to a palm behind me so that we fell back and he was hovering
over me. 

"You
know what I like to hear?" he asked.  I shook my head and he kissed me. 
"You saying my name when I'm inside you," he said right before he
pulled out and thrust back in, already hard.

My
eyes flashed and I said his name urgently. 

"Just
like that, baby," he said softly against my lips. 

He
pulled out and reached over to the table to switch out condoms.  I tugged him
back to me with greedy hands and he was back inside in seconds, thrusting in
and out, starting off faster than last time.   He was the roughest he had ever
been with me, but even so, it still wasn't too rough.  We chased our climax
together and came nearly simultaneously.  It felt more intense so I shouted his
name when I came, and he grinned with gratification.  I moved a hand between us
and felt him as he pumped in and out and he gasped against my mouth as he came
and it was
my
turn to grin. 

He
pulled out and went to the bathroom to clean up and I just waited there with my
limbs stretched in different directions, totally spent.  He came back in the
room and slid on his jeans and a shirt.

I
raised my eyebrows at him and he said, "I'll be right back."

He
left and I didn't move from my spot on the bed.  I closed my eyes and not two
minutes had passed before he returned.  He took off his shirt but left his
jeans on as he crawled onto the bed beside of me.  I glanced over and saw he
had a bucket of ice and a tangle of clear plastic bags on the bed beside of me
and a first-aid kid on the bedside table.

"What
are you doing?" I asked, though it was fairly obvious.

He
crawled over me to slip his hips between mine and rest his chin between my
ribs.  My hands brushed through his hair and his hands swept over my ribs
repeatedly as he said, "I just gave you three orgasms and didn't even
think about your injuries."

I
smiled.  "I don't have a gunshot wound," I pointed out.

"No,
you have multiple contusions and raw knuckles," he returned.

He
lifted onto his elbows and inspected my torso with his eyes and then dipped his
head to smooth his lips over the bruises and scratches that were forming on my
skin with an aching tenderness that melted my bones.  My hands touched his
shoulders as his mouth traveled up my chest to sweep across the skin just below
my collar bone where someone had hit me particularly hard.  He kept moving north
and brushed his lips across my cheek bones and jaw that were starting to ache
now that I wasn't totally engrossed in what his body was doing to mine.  He
finished with a light brush over my lips and then he reached over and popped
open a bottle.  He held two pain reliever pills against my lips.  I opened my
mouth and he placed them against my tongue and I swallowed them. 

"This
is the second time you've done this for me," I said.

"Yeah,
I like this time better.  You're wearing much less clothing," he grinned
wickedly.

I
wasn't wearing
any
clothing. 

He
covered up my body with the sheet to act as a barrier against the ice that he
bagged.  He placed them strategically against my legs, chest, and stomach . . .
basically everywhere that I had skin.  He leaned over to the table and grabbed
the triple-antibiotic ointment and bandages.  He wrapped my knuckles and then
iced those, too.

"Thanks,
love," I murmured.

His
eyes warmed on mine and he kissed me.  I didn't think I would ever tire of the
taste of his lips as they moved with mine.  I did know that I would never take
it for granted.

The
hospital took care of all of Ethan's injuries, so I didn't have any tending to
do with him right then but that didn't mean I wouldn't in the following days. 
I looked forward to it.

He
fell to the bed beside of me and crowded me with his body as he rested his
cheek on his bicep with his forearm curled around the crown of my head.  He
held a small pack of ice against my cheekbone and settled.

"How
are you even awake right now?" I asked.  "They drugged you up pretty
good."

"I'm
a big guy and I've always burned through medicine quickly.  And anyway, I was
dreaming that I couldn't find you all over again so I woke up and immediately
went to look for you."

I
brushed my fingers lightly across his bandage below his shoulder and gently
peeled it back to look at the stitches.  "We're investing in bulletproof
vests," I said.

He
grinned.  "Whatever you want," he said.

I
smiled at him sleepily and my eyelids began drifting closed for longer and
longer, though I was trying to fight it.  He wound his arm around my waist and
nudged my nose with his.

"Sleep."

I
watched through slit eyelids as he climbed out of bed to douse all the lights
and shuck his jeans and then crawl under the covers with me.  I wanted to curl
around him but I was weighted down with icepacks.  He resumed his previous
position of crowding around me and wound an arm around my waist and tangled our
legs.