Finally a Bride (45 page)

How could they be one and the same?

Why hadn’t she recognized him?

He had the same black hair. The same dark, probing eyes. And Butch had been tall, but never as well-built as Noah. Somewhere over the years, Butch had lost his pudginess and bad complexion and mean streak and turned into sweet, gentle Noah.

As if someone had snapped together the final piece in a jigsaw puzzle, it all made sense:

That connection she’d felt—as if they had a past history—made sense now.

His familiarity with her—how he knew so much about her

His odd comment about a possible headline: T
OWN
D
ELINQUENT
R
ETURNS AS
N
EW
P
ASTOR

No wonder Noah couldn’t stomach pork after his father had raised hogs. As poor as they’d been, it was probably all he’d eaten for years.

Some investigative reporter she turned out to be. The truth was right in front of her. He’d even tossed out clues to his identity like bread crumbs, but she’d acted like an infatuated schoolgirl blinded by reality.

But Noah had lied—and so had Luke.

She longed to do nothing except stay in bed all day, but she couldn’t.

Yet how could she face him?

What could she say to him?

Nothing.

She forced herself up and trod to the washroom. She rinsed her face, holding the soothing water on her eyes for a moment. Then she looked in the mirror and gasped.

Her cheek where Billy had hit her was red. Swollen. She worked her jaw, wincing at the pain.

She dressed and brushed her hair, then wandered downstairs, her heart as battered as her face.

She searched for Noah in the parlor, then the dining room, but instead, she found her ma and Carly washing dishes. Emmie sat at the table in her chair, munching on a biscuit, and smiled at her. Jack pulled out a kitchen chair and flopped down, feeling one hundred years old.

Her ma slid a cup of coffee in front of her and sat down. The strong aroma drifted up from the cup, teasing her senses.

“How do you feel?”

“Numb.”

“That will pass.”

Jack made a derogatory snort. “Maybe in twenty years.”

Emmie wrinkled up her nose and snorted, and Jack gave her sister a weak smile.

Her ma squeezed her forearm. Carly set a plate of biscuit, eggs, and bacon in front of her. All she could do was stare at the bacon. It reminded her of Noah. Of Butch.

She was in love with a liar and a man who had come within a hair’s inch of bashing Billy to pieces last night—not that he didn’t deserve it. Touching the sore place on her cheek, she realized that Noah had never actually hit Billy, but rather just held him away from her until Luke could get there. He wasn’t like her pa, after all. He had self-control.

Andrew squeaked from the bedroom then let out a yell. Carly tossed down the towel she’d been drying dishes with. “I’ll change his diaper and see if I can make him happy for a bit.”

“Where’s Luke?” Jack couldn’t bring herself to call him papa this morning.

“Down at the jail. He’s writing up formal charges against Billy for breaking into his mother’s store and also for Bertha’s murder. Turns out those two fellows that Garrett shot saw Billy breaking into the store, and they did the other robberies, hoping he would be blamed for all of them.” She shook her head. “Billy always was a troublesome boy, but I never expected him to be capable of such things.”

“Me neither. Did you know he broke in last night because he wanted the bracelet back that he gave me?”

Ma nodded. “Luke told me. Hardest thing I ever did was staying down here with Andrew when you girls were screaming.” She rubbed her palm over the top of Jack’s hand. “Luke feels like he let you down. His heart is breaking, you know.”

Jack’s lowered lip wobbled at causing him pain. “He should have told me.”

“He couldn’t. It was Noah’s place.”

“Luke could have said something before I started liking Noah.”

“And just when was that? Seems to me you were smitten from the moment you met him.”

Her ma didn’t play fair. Jack stared into her black coffee—coffee that reminded her of Noah’s eyes. She squeezed hers shut and pushed the cup away. “Do you think God sent Noah here for us to be together?”

“I think it’s highly possible, but I think God also had another purpose. This town needs a minister.”

Jack blew out a mocking breath. “Not one that lies.”

“Why are you fighting this so much? You know you love Noah. Are you going to let him get away just because of your stubborn pride?”

Jack glowered at her ma. “He
lied
to me—just like my first pa.”

“Everyone lies at one time or another, not that I’m making excuses for him, but when was the last time you lied?”

Jack winced. “How can I trust him again?”

“I don’t condone his lying, but he was scared.”

“Of what?”

“Of people rejecting him just because of who he was. Do you honestly think anyone who’d known him as the town bully would receive him as pastor? People harbor long memories of those who hurt their children or destroy their property.” Her mother slid the plate of food closer to her.

Something suddenly made sense. “That’s why he was chopping wood and painting the store—he was trying to make up for the bad things he’d done.” Jack’s heart ached. She’d treated him so cruelly.

Ma nodded again. “And I think he waited to tell you who he was because he was afraid of how you’d react.”

She hadn’t considered that. If she’d known from the start who he was, she probably would have snubbed him—might not have even gone to church—and she’d have missed his thought-provoking messages. She broke off a piece of bacon and put it in her mouth, enjoying the flavor.

“I don’t know what to do. I’d be lying if I said I don’t care for him, but how can I face him again after how I reacted last night? I wasn’t very nice.”

“You were hurt—and reacted accordingly.” Her mother sighed and played with the corner of the towel she’d used to dry dishes.

“What’s wrong?”

The look that engulfed her mother’s pretty face scared Jack, but she didn’t know what she should be afraid of. “What is it?”

Her ma’s pale blue eyes looked straight into Jack’s. She swallowed hard, knowing she wouldn’t like whatever her ma was going to say.

“I’m sorry, sweetie, but Noah is gone.”

A cruel fist squeezed Jack’s heart and wouldn’t let go. “What do you mean he’s gone? Has he already moved to the parsonage?”

“No, he left town.”

Jack jumped up so fast the chair fell backward and banged on the floor. “No! Where did he go?”

“Uh-oh,” Emmie said and pointed to the chair. Jack picked it up but remained standing.

“Sit down, sweetie.”

“I can’t. What am I going to do? Why did he leave?”

Her ma stood and came to her, pulling Jack to her chest. “He said it was better for everyone if he did. Better for you.”

“I was wrong, Ma. He’s a good man.”

“Yes, he is. He’s not the troubled youth he used to be. God took that wild boy, washed him clean with the blood of Jesus, and formed him into a man of character. A man who loves you.”

And she loved him. So help her, she did. How could she have been such a stubborn fool?

She’d let her pride—her refusal to forgive—steal something precious. Her vendetta toward her pa had killed her chances with Noah.

Forgive me, Lord. Help me forgive my pa for all the mean, hurtful things he did
.

Jack hugged her ma then stepped back. “You said Noah was headed home? Back to Emporia?”

She nodded. “I think the only person Noah has in the world is Pete, the man who took him in.”

Jack backed away, her determination swelling with each breath she took. “No, Ma, he’s got us, too.”

She spun on her heels and ran into the hall.

“Where are you going?”

“To don my trousers.”

Chapter 33

N
oah walked his horse down the dusty lane. He was looking forward to seeing Pete again, yet each step Rebel took was a step farther away from Jackie. He missed her with every speck of his mind, body, and soul. He didn’t know how he’d go on.

All he’d wanted was a chance to prove he’d changed. He’d fooled himself into believing she loved him, but she never truly had any faith in him—she didn’t as a child, and she didn’t now.

He’d finally found a place he thought he could call home. People had started accepting and befriending him. Trusting and respecting him.

And he’d lost it all.

Lost his chance to tell the townsfolk of God’s love.

Lost the woman he loved.

Tears stung his eyes, and he tilted his head toward the heavens. “I’ve failed in every way, Lord. Forgive me.”

He reined Rebel off the road into a patch of grass and dismounted. Kneeling, he cried out to God. “Forgive me for leaving the town You sent me to. Forgive me for failing You. Make this burning ache go away, Lord.”

Yet maybe he deserved the pain. Hadn’t he hated his own father? Caused trouble for his schoolmates and the townsfolk each time his pa had beat him? Hadn’t his mother and sister died because he’d been too scared to leave them and ride for the doctor?

He was an utter failure.

“No, son, you are forgiven. You are deeply loved. Forgive yourself.”

A sob gushed forth from the deepest recesses of his soul as he turned loose of the pain of his past and let the words of God wash over him.

Soothing.

Comforting.

Healing.

He was a child of God. His pain had momentarily blinded him so that he’d listened to the lies of Satan. But he wasn’t a failure—he was a man of worth because of Christ’s blood, which was shed for him on the cross. He was fully forgiven.

As the reality of the truth set in, Noah relaxed in the peace that only God can bring a troubled man. After the sleepless night before, he closed his eyes, weary from battling his fears but confident now in God’s love. He may always love Jackie, but now he could give her to the Lord. He closed his eyes, and sleep overtook him.

The sound of rifle fire jerked him awake.

The rifle shook in Jack’s hands. “Get up from there, Reverend.”

“Jackie?” Noah stared at her, his eyes still foggy from sleep. “What are you doing?”

“You ran out on me, and I’m not letting you get away that easily.” She forced her voice to sound gruff when all she wanted to do was wrap her arms around Noah and kiss him silly.

He lumbered to his feet and rubbed his eyes. “Am I dreaming? Or did you really just shoot at me?”

She could see his apprehension—and no wonder after how she had acted. She slid the rifle into the scabbard that hung from the horse and saddle she’d borrowed from Dan Howard. Bolstering her determination with a quick prayer, she turned back to Noah. “I’m sorry. Your confession last night took me by surprise—and I never liked surprises.”

He took a step toward her. “I’m sorry, too. I should have told you sooner, but first I wanted you to get to know me as I am now. I’ve changed. God changed me.”

“I know.” She closed the space between them, tears stinging her eyes and making Noah’s face blur. “Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?”

He exhaled a cough of disbelief. “Are you serious?”

She smacked him on the arm. “Of course I am. Do you think I’d ride all this way if I wasn’t?”

“Yeah, I do, if you were truly bent on shooting me.” He grinned and rubbed his arm, something enticing now burning in his gaze. “You pack a wallop for such a little thing.”

“I’m an expert shot, too, so don’t forget it.”

“All right.” He ducked his head and toed the dirt. “I’m really sorry, Jackie. I just didn’t think you’d give me half a chance if you knew who I was.”

“We’ll never know now, but I want to put it behind us. Do you have feelings for me or not?” She was tired of mincing words. “And are you going to forgive me or not?”

“Yes.” He stepped closer and ran the back of his finger down her cheek.

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, I forgive you, and yes, I love you.”

That was all she needed to hear. Jack lunged into his arms, and her lips met his. He lifted her off the ground, nearly squeezing the air from her lungs as he showered her with kisses. The kisses took a turn, desperate, frantic—and then he pulled back, his breath heavy on her cheek.