Finding Me (The Bad Boy Series) (23 page)

             
Then it clicked. He was talking about Angel. Angel had touched me in the places he  was licking right now. My body heated further as I realized he is making his mark on me, an invisible mark only I would see, feel and love.

             
He dropped to his knees in front of me, pulling up my shirt and exposing the flesh of my stomach. He dipped his head and slowly rained kisses along the waistband of my jeans, before going to my zipper and giving it one swift lick across the seam.

             
“Even here,” he whispered, so quietly.

             
I trembled. My knees locked and I quickly reached out and ran my fingers through his hair, grabbing tight and not letting go. He words penetrated me and I wanted him to carry on leaving his mark.

             
“Then make him leave.”

             
As soon as the words left my lips, he was on me. Grabbing my by the waist, he pulled me up and placed me onto his lap. I never once let go of him. I don’t think I could ever let go of him. We didn't move, we just basked in the feeling of being in each other’s arms again.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered, placing his hands underneath my shirt, running his hands along my bare skin. "Every single piece of you."

"Make him go away," I told him and pulled him towards my lips.

His lips slowly caressed my own, a kiss that warms me right through to my bones. His kiss was slow and full of promise, and I couldn't help but moan as he traced the length of my bottom lip with his tongue. I opened for him, giving him the permission to explore my mouth with his tongue.

He took my mouth, explored it, loved it, claimed it. Suddenly we moved, and I felt the soft surface of my bed against my back as he leaned over me. He positioned himself between my legs, and my body heated to the point of no return. I wanted him, I needed him, I loved him.

I could only watch with bated breath as he ran his fingers along the waistband of my jeans, his fingertips moving higher and higher towards to my bra underneath. He dipped his head and brought his lips to the skin around my rib cage, and nipped playfully. I moaned as my shirt moved higher and higher with each movement he made, making my head spin and my skin hum.

His hands reached my breasts, pushing my shirt over my bra. Dipping his head again, he placed a single lingering kiss on each of my breasts; first the left, then the right. I trembled as the warmth of his lips took hold of every nerve ending in my body.

"God," I whispered through a moan.

"No, just me, baby." He laughs against my breast.

I squirmed, I couldn't keep still. I was desperate for him, for us. He snaked his arm around my back and lifted me from the bed, pulling my shirt over my head in one swift move. He tentatively placed his right hand over my right breast and squeezed gently, pulling a soft moan from my lips as I let my head drop back between my shoulders.

"Jesus," he whispered, squeezing my breast a second time. "So damn perfect."

His hand slowly moved from my breast, around to my back. I felt the release of my bra as he unclasped the strap, slowly moving back around and sliding the straps down my arms. My nipples puckered at the small chill in the air, hardening even more Logan drank me in.

My bra was thrown on the floor, followed by his shirt. I watched as each defined muscle flexed with his movements, his abs twisting and becoming more defined as he moved back towards me.

"I love you," he said quietly, staring at me right in the eyes.

"I love you too."

His sexy smirk took over his lips before he brought them to my nipple. Kissed, sucked, licked and nibbled his way from the right to the left. I moaned from the pleasure that shot right through to my aching core.

In an instant, my jeans were on the floor, the only thing separating him from being inside me were my panties. At some point he had taken his jeans and tight black boxers off, and now held a condom wrapper between his teeth. He raised his brow and smirked. How was it possible he could make a condom wrapper look sexy?

Leaning down, he placed the other edge of the condom in my mouth. Copying his movements, I wrapped my teeth around it. In one slow movement, he pulled against the wrapper, ripping it in two. Pulling back slightly, he took the wrapper from my mouth and took the condom from it,  discarded wrapper on the floor long with our clothes. He took his time, with slow measured movements he pulled the condom along his hard length, a low groan escaping his lips. Once he was completely sheathed, he cocked his brow one last time before grabbing my waist, pulling my core to his awaiting mouth.

With my panties still on, he ran his tongue down my center and hummed against me.

"I need in, baby. I need to love you."

"God, yes," I panted.

I was beyond desperate for him, I wanted him to know just how much I loved him, just how sorry I really was. He took my panties, and in one slow, measured pull, he ripped my them right down the seam, the lace fabric unable to resist his charm and strength.

Pulling my waist towards him, he stopped just as I felt the tip of him against me. I moaned, I quivered and I all but begged for him to push inside. But he didn't, he stayed right where he was.

"Tell me you love me, baby," he said, running those slow, lazy circles in the soft skin of my thighs.

"I love you," I whispered.

"Tell me you'll never run from me," he whispered, pushing the first inch inside me.

"I would never run from you." I moaned.

"Tell me that that you're mine."

Another inch, another moan, another spine tingling shiver.

"I'm ... I'm ... Oh, god." I groaned as he plunged deep inside of me.

He suddenly stilled, groaning as he stopped his movements. I panted so hard that it echoed all around us. Jesus.

"Tell me." He grunted, thrusting slow but hard.

"Yours ... holy shit! I'm yours!" I shouted as he picked up the pace.

He smiled. Leaning down, he pressed his forehead against mine. His eyes were staring right into mine as he thrust inside me. Taking me, claiming me and loving me.

"I love you so much." He captured my mouth with his.

"Jesus," I whispered. I felt a slow burn building inside of me, so close to erupting. "I love you. I love you. Shit, I love you." I moaned loudly.

He made love to me in a deliciously slow pace. Our moans molded together as he thrust and I met him every time. Suddenly he grabbed my wrists and pulled them above my head, holding me down as he loved me with each measured stroke. My legs started to quiver, the rest of my body following suit. I quickly wrapped my thighs around his waist, giving him a better angle and pushing my pleasure up ten-fold.

With one angled stroke of his hips, he thrust inside me, pushing me right into ecstasy and pulling his name from my lips. With two more hard thrusts, he called out my name and stilled inside of me.

After a couple of minutes we both get our breath back. Pulling out, he took off the condom and threw it into the trash can beside the bed. I was exhausted, but I couldn't keep the smile off my face. Logan lay down beside me and pulled me against his chest, spooning me from behind.

I closed my eyes, and fell into an uninterrupted sleep for the first time in months. We had a long way to go, each of us have hurt the other in more ways than we could have possibly imagined. I have hurt him over and over again, and I planned to make it up to him for as long as he will have me.

It’s funny how not so long ago, I thought I was just existing, not living. I had been living, I always have. I live because of Logan, I live for Logan and I wouldn’t be here in his arms without him. Time was something I wanted to get some control over, thinking that if you were just existing, then time would just slowly pass you by. But, I have come to realize, time will pass you by either way. It’s about what you do with that time that is the most important thing of all.

Chapter Twenty-Five

Logan

3 Months Later...

I smiled as I look around the table, taking a long pull of my beer. Everyone was here: Tate, Low, Dex, Trix, even the twins. But the one person I can't take my eyes off is her, Neva. She's laughing and joking with Dex, while holding onto my hand underneath the table with her vice-like grip.

"Baby, if you don't let up on my hand, it might just fall off," I whispered to her, making sure no one else hears me.

"Oh, sorry," she replied quietly, pulling her hand out of mine.

I took hold of her hand and squeezed it gently in my own. I knew she was nervous, I didn't want her to feel any more nervous than she should be. The road to here has been bumpy; like any relationship, we have our ups and downs. Neva is still seeing her therapist, but is doing well. She has come to terms with the fact that her father's death wasn't her fault. The nightmares are still there, still pulling her in and keeping a chokehold on her, but they are becoming less and less frequent.

The morning after we decided to trust each other, I asked her to move in with me. I wanted to go to sleep seeing her face and wake with her in my arms. I wanted to be there when her nightmares would destroy her in her sleep, but she refused. She said it was too fast, and that we had to build on what we had first. I reluctantly agreed, but five days out of seven she sleeps next to me anyway.

Now, we're at Bones and I could feel Neva's nervousness. She had finally plucked up enough courage to get on the stage and sing; it will be the first time she has sung and played in public for a long time. I have been silently listening to her practice in my apartment. Her voice slices through me every time, and makes me fall even deeper in love with her, if that's possible.

"Logan, I don't think I can do this," she whispered, leaning into my side.

I tilted my head slightly and gave her a small smile. She could do this, I knew she could.

"Baby, imagine you're playing only for me. Forget the room and the people, and just think about us," I whispered. Leaning in, I placed a soft kiss to the delicate skin behind her ear.

"Okay," she said breathlessly.

My breathing spiked as the breathless whisper left her lips. Shit, I want her.

"Come with me," I said, standing up from my chair.

She followed as I made my way from our table. Moving through the crowded bar, I pulled us into the back room. As soon as she stepped foot into the room, I clicked the door shut behind us and grabbed hold of her waist. I lifted her up, placing her on my hips and walked forward with her.  Pushing her against the wall, I groaned as her jeans rubbed against my aching cock. I cup her face and stared into her eyes for a couple of seconds before lowering my lips to her mouth.

"You."
Kiss
"Are."
Kiss
"So."
Kiss
"Beautiful."
Kiss.

I pulled back and bite my bottom lip; if she didn't have to get up on that stage, I would take her right here, right now. But I knew I couldn't. She came here to prove she can heal, that she's getting better. I didn't need her to get up on that stage for her to prove anything. She was perfect in every fucking way.

"Better?" I whispered, resting my forehead against hers.

She nodded slowly, throwing her arms around my neck trying to get even closer.

"Baby, carry on doing that, and I will take you home and you will not walk out of that apartment until I have you screaming my name," I warned.

She tilted her head and smiled playfully at me, cocking her brow and biting down on her plump bottom lip.

"Oh, no. Don't even think about it." I laughed.

She laughed along with me. Damn, it felt good. I still couldn't believe she was here, with me, loving me. After everything, we were finally in a place that feels so good.

"We need to head back before they start asking questions," she whispered as she brushed her lips against mine.

"Stop kissing me then." I chuckled. She didn't stop. Instead, she deepened the kiss, running her tongue along my bottom lip, begging for entry, I gave it to her. Her tongue grazed mine and my world has done a complete one-eighty. I could never get enough of this, of her.

"Okay, kids! Break it up. Neva, you're on in five!"

I pulled back from her to find Dex with a huge smirk on his face. Great.

"Get out, pervert!" I laughed.

He flipped me the bird before turning around and leaving us there in the back room, alone once again.

"I suppose I better get ready." The nervousness rolled off of her.

I placed a soft kiss upon her lips and whispered, "Just me, okay? Just play for me."

She nodded slightly before I placed her down on her feet. Turning around, I grabbed the neck of her guitar and we walked out of the room, hand in hand. I pulled her hand to my lips and kiss it gently. She made her way up to the stage and I followed behind her. As she positioned the microphone on the stand in front of her, I held out the strap of the guitar and placed it over her shoulders.