Finn (Blue-Collar Billionaires #2) (10 page)

Finn turns on the television and we settle on the couch. I grab one of the pillows and squeeze it to my middle trying to pretend that relaxing in a place that looks like a layout for Architectural Digest is no big deal. I'm also determined to ignore what he just muttered under his breath. Things felt different last night, like we reached an agreement. But that doesn't mean I trust him.
 

"We can watch whatever you want."

I shrug. "I don't watch much TV. I'm never home when most shows are on anyway."

He tunes it to one of the morning shows. The anchors are talking about the latest bestselling book, something racy with a cover that makes me blush just to look at it.
 

Finn points at the TV. “Emma has that book. Tank teased her about it until she finally told him that reading hot books is to his benefit. That shut him up pretty quickly."

"I don't get why people think they have the right to shame women for their entertainment choices. And nobody asks men to defend why they're watching the last Mission Impossible or Jason Bourne flick. No one says they must be boring or unfulfilled in their real lives because they like those shows."

"Who says that?"

"Usually jerks on TV. Anyway, all those action movies are way more unrealistic in my opinion and they glorify violence. If you have to portray something unrealistic, I don't see how showing people falling in love is hurting anything."

He glances over at me. "Falling in love is unrealistic?"

The soft tone of his voice lulls me. I know what he's thinking. How can it be unrealistic when we had that? We had in reality what most people only experience in the pages of a book or through soft focus scenes in a movie. But I can't think about that right now so I take the coward's way out and make a joke of it.
 

"Isn't it? I'm glad it works out for some people but I think for most of us, it's still nothing but a fantasy."

"I hear billionaires in those love books are all the rage. According to Emma's ereader anyway."

I look over at him in shock. "You were snooping?"

He has the decency to at least look embarrassed. "It was right next to me on the table! I don't have one so I just wanted to see how they work. Anyway, I thought it was funny especially since most billionaires are my father's age."

"Well, I think most women who have that particular fantasy are imagining someone more like you." I don't tell him that I know that from experience, since he's been my favorite late night fantasy for years.
 

"Except like most wealthy men in my age group, I'm not a billionaire. More like a billionaire-in-waiting. I'm set to inherit billions and so are my brothers. There are very few young men who are independently wealthy. Most inherit it."

"That's not nearly as sexy. Let us keep our fantasies, please."

His lashes lower and his gaze turns heated. "Is that what you fantasize about, Ris?"

Suddenly I can barely breathe. How am I supposed to talk about fantasies with Finn sitting next to me looking like a wet dream? I close my eyes but that just makes it worse. I can hear every sound when he moves closer, the soft shuffling when he stands, the whisper of his jeans against the fabric of the couch as he sits down again. When I open my eyes, he's right next to me.
 

"Finn?" I don't mean it to but it comes out as a question. A plea. This is when I'm supposed to be strong and push him away. He's already admitted that he just wants to get me out of his system. I shouldn't want him at all when I know his ultimate end goal is to use me and then forget about me.
 

But then his hand slides under my neck and his mouth is on mine. I'm glad he didn't take it slow and get my permission because I don't want to think right now. I just want to feel and to remember. And kissing him is just like I remember.

A whimper escapes before I can stop it as his lips travel back and forth over mine. Just soft brushes that awaken every nerve ending. Kissing him was always like this, a sensual experience that made me feel like every inch of my skin was alive. I arch up to him, reaching, trying to get him to deepen the kiss but as always he's in firm control. Then he tugs me closer and tilts his head. The angle changes everything.

My lips part willingly under his and his tongue invades my mouth. His taste,
god his taste
, is perfect. My fingers clench against his chest as I resist the urge to grab him and start exploring. Being with him so young had some advantages. I'd had inhibitions but with Finn, I'd never felt insecure. I hadn't worried about whether my ass was too big or if my thighs didn't touch. With the kind of adulation that only a teenage boy can have for a naked woman, he'd made me feel like a goddess. I can remember hours of touching, kissing and cuddling where we'd done nothing but bring each other pleasure.

But we'd been different people then. We were in love. Making love with Finn had always been about showing each other how we felt. This kiss is a tangled web of lust, deceit and anger.
 

Because Finn doesn't love me anymore.
 

"Finn, wait. We can't." I push back slightly but can't seem to stop my hands from roaming all over his chest.

He steals one last kiss, his hands tightening slightly on the back of my neck. It doesn't make me feel threatened at all, rather I get a visceral sense of just how much he wants me. He has unresolved feelings of anger toward me for what I did but he wants me still.
 

"I'm sorry. That really wasn't why I asked you to stay." He moves back slightly. His lips are swollen and I like seeing the evidence of what we just did. I lick my own lips instinctively, getting one last taste of him.
 

He growls and then whips around to face the TV. It takes a few minutes but eventually my own breathing settles back to normal and we watch the rest of the morning talk show in silence. After it's over, Finn stands.
 

"I'm going to take a shower. A cold one."

At his words my eyes are instantly drawn to the bulge at the front of his jeans. I don't dare look up at him right now because I have no willpower where he's concerned. I'll just end up joining him and helping him take care of the problem I created.
 

He hands me the remote. "You can watch something else or close your eyes and catch a nap if you want. But I'd better not find you cleaning when I come back out here."

"Bossy." I whisper the words but if his quick grin is any indication, he hears me anyway. Once he disappears down the hallway, I put my feet up on the couch and close my eyes, instantly reliving our heated kiss. Stopping him was really hard but I know it was the right thing to do.
 

That day when I ran into his room, he'd warned me then that he meant to have me again. But I'd known then just as surely as I know now, that his desire wasn't about love, it was about proving a point. It was about revenge. Now that we've cleared the air, I don't think Finn is still trying to hurt me but if I'm not careful that's exactly what will happen.
 

Making love with Finn is one of the few unspoiled memories I have in my life. I don't want anything to take that away from me.
 

FINN

It's nearly midnight and I am exhausted. I also have newfound respect for Rissa. It's not that I ever thought cleaning was easy. It's more that I had no idea it was this fucking
hard
.
 

"You can take a break if you need to." Rissa glances over at me. I'm in the middle of tying up another monster-sized trash bag.
 

Mercers is a pretty big store and we've been over every inch of it in detail. According to Rissa, the employees of the store do general tidying, clean their employee bathrooms and handle vacuuming their individual sections of the store. However, the owners found it more efficient to hire out for the rest of their janitorial needs. So Rissa has assigned me to help her with emptying all the trash bins so she can run the big machine that buffs the floors.
 

"I'm okay." It rankles slightly to think that she's worried about me. Like I'm some weakling that can't handle a little physical work.
 

My leg may be compromised but the rest of me is still in pretty decent shape. I heft the bag slightly so I can drag it to the back section of the store. The other one I've filled is sitting there. I'll have to take them to the dumpster out back before we leave.
 

When I come back, Rissa is just finishing the last section in the main entryway.
 

"I don't know how you do this every day." I have to yell slightly so she can hear me over the sound of the machine.

Rissa shrugs and then turns the buffer off. "Lots of people have it worse. We all just do what we have to."

I walk over and tip up her chin. "That was a compliment in case that didn't come through. You are amazing."

Her cheeks flush. "I'm used to working hard. I remember that you were the same way."

"I was. Maybe that's part of my problem now. I don't have that same sense of purpose. The accident took that away from me just as much as it took pieces of my leg."

She looks up at me sharply. It's the first time I've talked about my injury to her at all. It's not something that I'm comfortable with myself yet. But I don't want her to think that I'm some lazy playboy just because I have money now.
 

I brush a finger over the skin of her cheek. Her skin was always perfect. Just like everything else about her. It's part of the reason I've never been able to get her off my mind. Ever since that scorching kiss this afternoon, I haven't been able to think about anything else but touching her again. Kissing her wasn't my intention but she'd been so close and looking at me the same way she is now. Like she's remembering how good it used to be. Damn if that doesn't make me want to show her how much better it would be now.

"I was sorry to hear about you getting hurt. My mom still keeps in touch with some of the people from the old neighborhood. I didn’t know exactly what happened, just that you’d been hurt. I wanted to visit you but I didn't think you'd want to see me."
 

She has no idea. After the accident, I'd been filled with rage. At myself, at fate, at the face that wasn't there. She was the first person I asked for when I woke up in the hospital. My mom told me that later. I was delirious from pain and my first instinct was to call out for Rissa. It wasn't until later that I remembered that she wasn't mine anymore.
 

"I probably wouldn't have been able to handle it just then. I was a mess."

"You were injured. You were allowed to be a mess." She smiles up at me and then all at once seems to realize how close we're standing. She takes a step back and then looks around. "I guess that's it then. We're done for now."

"That's it?" I try not to sound too excited but I'm definitely ready to get home and sit down. My back hurts and my leg is going to be aching tomorrow for sure. I've pushed too hard and the muscles are already knotted in protest.
 

"Yeah, let's get out of here. I'm sure this isn't what you were expecting when you volunteered to help but I want you to know how much I appreciate it. Things should be back to normal tomorrow."

"I didn't mind at all." To my surprise, it's the absolute truth. I wouldn't characterize the past few hours as fun but it was good to be around Rissa for so long. It felt like the old days when we'd spend hours after school in each other's company. Usually she'd be doing homework while I was practicing for baseball. Then I'd walk her home and spend a little time flirting with her mom, Gloria, to make her laugh. Those had been good times. Simple times.

It was a relief to be able to remember them without bitterness again.
 

"Come on, let's go."

"Wait, I have to take the trash out." I walk to the back of the store and heft the two large bags out into the alleyway. The dumpster sits right outside the back door but it still gives me a bad feeling. If I hadn't volunteered to help out, Rissa would have been out here alone at this time of night.
 

Hell, no.
She might not be mine anymore but I can't have her alone in alleys in the middle of the night when any kind of criminal could find her. A few ideas run through my head but none that Rissa will go along with. I could hire her to work for me exclusively and then I'd always know she was safe. There's no way she'd go for that so I think briefly about hiring a companion to work with her. She's proud and won't accept anything she sees as charity but if I help her hire more staff, then there won't be a need for her to work alone ever. There will always at least be someone with her to make sure she's safe.
 

If the maid I hire just happens to have a background as a bodyguard and assassin, well, Rissa doesn't need to know that part does she?

When I get up front Rissa has put away the buffer and waits by the front door. She locks up behind us as we leave. When we step out into the soft, humid air she raises her face to the sky. "It's a nice night. I used to hate the late shift until I realized that it's so nice to be out when everyone else is sleeping. The stars are mine alone."

I look up too, trying to see through her eyes. This is what she's always done for me. She brings me to a new awareness. Shows me the things that I can't see.
 

Makes me happy.

"Go on a date with me."

Rissa's head snaps around from where she's looking at the stars. She blinks at me a few times and then huffs out a breath. "What did you just say?"

Feeling slightly foolish for the way I just blurted it out, I scowl. "You heard me. Go out with me. On a date."

She looks like she's not sure whether to laugh or not. "Are you asking me or telling me? Geez, you've gotten a lot bossier over the years."

I move closer. "I used to tell you to do a lot of things. And you liked it."