First Comes Baby...: The Loner's Guarded Heart (15 page)

‘Giving me the house was your way of saying sorry and trying to make amends, wasn’t it?’

He nodded. ‘I wanted your future secure. It seemed the least I could do.’

His admission touched her.

‘But moving out of this house brought me to my senses about Elsie too. Missing her made me realise what she’d come to mean to me.’

So that had been the trigger—an illness, a recuperation, and then a change of address. Evidently romance worked in mysterious ways.

‘I know this isn’t going to change anything, Megan, but when you were growing up I thought you were spending so much time at Elsie’s because she’d become a kind of surrogate mother to you. When I was recovering from my illness and Elsie was coming over to sit with me, I found out she’d thought Ben was spending that time here because I was providing the role of surrogate father. With each of us thinking that...’ He pressed his fingers to his eyes. ‘We just let things slide along the way they were.’

If they’d known differently, would he and Elsie have roused themselves from their depression? It was something they’d never know now.

She squeezed his hand. ‘I think it’s time to put the past behind us.’ And as she said the words she realised she meant them. She had a baby on the way. She wanted to look towards the future, not back to the past.

‘C’mon, I think it’s time.’

‘Is Ben going to do the right thing by you and the baby?’

She and Ben hadn’t told a soul that he was the baby’s father. But her father and Elsie weren’t stupid or blind. She pulled in a breath. ‘Yes, he will. He always does what’s best for me.’

She just wished she knew if that meant he was staying or if he was going. ‘You have to understand, though, that what you think is best and what Ben and I think is best may be two very different things.’ She didn’t want the older couple hassling Ben, pressuring him.

‘I understand.’ Her father nodded heavily. ‘I have no right to interfere. I just want to see you happy, Megan.’

‘No,’ she agreed, ‘you’re
not
allowed to interfere.’ She took his arm and squeezed it. ‘But you are allowed to care.’

She smiled up at him. He smiled back. ‘C’mon—let’s go get you married and then celebrate in style.’

* * *

The moment Meg stepped into the rose garden with her father Ben couldn’t take his eyes from her.

‘Are they there yet?’ Elsie asked, her voice fretful, her fingers tapping against the kitchen table. ‘They’re late.’

He snapped to. ‘They’re exactly on time.’ He kept his eyes on Meg for as long as he could as he backed away from the window. Swallowing, he turned to find Elsie alternately plucking at her skirt, her flowers and her hair. It was good to know she wasn’t as cool and calm as she appeared or wanted everyone to think. ‘Ready?’

She nodded. She looked lovelier than he’d ever seen her. He thought about what Meg would want him to say at this moment. ‘Elsie?’

She glanced up at him.

‘Mr Parrish is a very lucky man.’

‘Oh!’ Her cheeks turned pink.

He suddenly grinned. ‘I expect he’s going to take one look at you and want to drag you away from the celebrations at an indecently early hour.’

Her cheeks turned even redder and she pressed her hands to them. The she reached out and swatted him with her bouquet. ‘Don’t talk such nonsense, Ben!’

He tucked her hand into the crock of his arm and led her through the house and out through the front door. ‘It’s not nonsense. Just you wait.’

Ben had meant to watch for the expression on Laurie’s face the first moment he glimpsed Elsie, but one sidelong glance at Meg and Ben’s attention was lost. Perspiration prickled his nape. He couldn’t drag his gaze away.

Meg wore a deep purplish-blue dress, and in the sun it gleamed like a jewel. She stood there erect and proud, with her gently rounded stomach, looking out-of-this-world desirable. Like a Grecian goddess. He stared at her bare shoulders and all he could think of was pressing kisses to the beckoning golden skin. He could imagine their satin sun-kissed warmth. He sucked air into oxygen-starved lungs. A raging thirst built inside him.

A diamante brooch gathered the material of the dress between her breasts. Filmy material floated in the breeze and drifted down to her ankles. She’d be wearing sexy sandals and he wanted to look, really he did, but he found it impossible to drag his gaze from the lush curves of her breasts.

He moistened his lips. His heart thumped against his ribcage. His skin started to burn. Meg’s dress did nothing to hide her new curves. Curves he could imagine in intimate detail—their softness, their weight in his hands, the way her nipples would peak under his hungry gaze as they were doing now. He imagined how they’d tauten further as he ran a thumb back and forth across them, the taste of them and their texture as he—

For Pete’s sake!

He wrenched his gaze away, his mouth dry. A halfway decent guy did
not
turn his best friend into an object of lust. A halfway decent guy would not let her think even for a single second that there could ever be anything more between them than friendship.

He did his best to keep his gaze averted from all her golden promise, tried to focus on the ceremony. He wasn’t equal to the task—not even when Elsie and Laurie surprised everyone by revealing they’d written their own vows. He was too busy concentrating on not staring at Meg, on not lusting after her, to catch what those vows were.

A quick glance at Meg—a super-quick glance—told him they’d been touching. Her eyes had grown bright with unshed tears, her smile soft, and her lips—

He dragged his gaze away again, his pulse thundering in his ears.

It seemed to take a hundred years, but finally Elsie and Laurie were pronounced husband and wife. And then Laurie kissed Elsie in a way that didn’t help the pressure building in Ben’s gut. There were cheers and congratulations all round. Four of Meg’s girlfriends threw glittery confetti in the air. Gold and silver spangles settled in Meg’s hair, on her cheek and shoulders, and one landed on the skin of her chest just above her—

He jerked his gaze heavenward.

Meg broke away from the group surrounding the newlyweds to slip her arm through his. ‘We’re going to have a ten-minute photoshoot with the photographer, and then it’ll be party time.’

There was a photographer? He glanced around. He hadn’t captured the way Ben had been ogling Meg, had he? Please, God.

‘You scrub up real nice, Ben Sullivan.’ She squeezed his arm. ‘I don’t think I’ve seen you in a suit since you stepped in to take me to my high school formal when Jason Prior dumped me to partner Rochelle Collins instead.’

He’d stepped in as a friend back then. He needed to find that same frame of mind, that same outlook, quick-smart.

Minus the kiss that had happened that night!

He dragged in a breath.

Don’t think about it.

He’d been a sex-starved teenager back then, that’s all.

And Meg had been beautiful.

She’s more beautiful now
.

‘But I don’t remember you filling out a suit half so well back then.’

He closed his eyes. Not just at her words, but at the husky tone in which they were uttered. The last thing he needed right now was for Meg to start feeling sexy. At least she had an excuse—pregnancy hormones. Him? He was just low life scum.

If he kissed Meg again it wouldn’t stop at kisses. They both knew that. But one night would never be enough for Meg. And two nights was one night too many as far as he was concerned.

It would wreck their friendship. He couldn’t risk that—not now they had a child to consider.

‘You okay?’

He steeled himself and then glanced down. Her brow had creased, her eyes were wary. He swallowed and nodded.

She gestured towards the newlyweds. ‘The service was lovely.’

‘Yep.’

His tie tightened about his throat. Please God, don’t let her ask him anything specific. He couldn’t remember a damn thing about the ceremony.

She smiled, wide and broad. ‘I have a good feeling about all of this.’

Just for a moment that made him smile too. ‘Pollyanna,’ he teased.

Her eyes danced, her lips shone, and hunger stretched through him.

If I lost your friendship, I don’t know what I would do.

He swallowed the bile that burned his throat. He couldn’t think of anything worse than losing Meg’s friendship.

And yet...

He clenched his hands. Yet it wasn’t enough to dampen his rising desire to seduce her.

Something in his face must have betrayed him because she snapped away from him, pulling her arm from his. ‘Stop looking at me like that!’

The colour had grown high in her cheeks. Her eyes blazed. Neither of those things dampened his libido. That said, he wasn’t sure a slap to the face or a cold shower would have much of an effect either.

‘Darn it, Ben. I should have known this was how you’d react to the wedding.’

She kept her voice low—bedroom-low—and—

He cut the thought off and tried to focus on her words. ‘What are you talking about?’

‘All this hearts and flowers stuff has made you want to beat your chest and revert to your usual caveman tactics just to prove you’re not affected. That you’re immune.’

‘Caveman?’ he spluttered. ‘I’ll have you know I have more finesse than that.’

They glared at each other.

‘Besides, you’re underestimating yourself.’ He scowled. ‘You look great in that dress.’ With a superhuman effort he managed to maintain eye contact and slowly the tension between them lessened. ‘Can we get these photos underway?’ he growled.

He needed to be away from Meg asap with an ice-cold beer in his hand.

* * *

The reception went without a hitch.

The food was great. The music was great. The company was great. The speech Laurie made thanking Meg and Ben for the wedding and admitting what a lucky man he was, admitting that he’d found a new lease of life, touched even Ben.

The reception went without a hitch except throughout it all Ben was far too aware of Meg. Of the way she moved, the sound of her laughter, the warmth she gave out to all those around her. Of the sultry way she moved on the dance floor. He scowled. She certainly hadn’t lacked for dance partners.

He’d made sure that he’d danced too. There were several beautiful women here, and three months ago he’d have done his best to hook up with one of them—go for a drink somewhere and then back to her place afterwards. It seemed like a damn fine plan except...

I don’t like the way you treat women
.

He’d stopped dancing after that.

His gaze lowered to the rounded curve of Meg’s stomach and his throat tightened.

‘Hey, buddy!’ A clap on the shoulder brought him back.

Ben turned and then stood to shake hands. ‘Dave, mate—great to see you here. Meg said you were coming. Have a seat.’

They sat and Dave surveyed him. ‘It’s been a great night.’

‘Yeah.’

‘Meg’s told me what a help you’ve been with the wedding prep.’

She had? He shrugged. ‘It was nothing.’

Dave glanced at Meg on the dance floor. ‘That’s not how she sees it.’

He bit back a groan. The last thing he needed was someone admiring Meg when he was doing his damnedest to concentrate on doing anything but.

Dave shifted on his chair to face him more fully. ‘Something has popped up in my portfolio that I think will interest you.’

Anything that could keep his mind off Meg for any length of time was a welcome distraction. ‘Tell me more.’

‘If you want it, I can get you on the crew for a yacht that’s setting off around the world. It leaves the week after next and expects to be gone five months.’ He shrugged and sat back. ‘I know it’s something you’ve always wanted to do.’

Ben stared at the other man and waited for the rush of anticipation to hit him. This was something he’d always wanted—the last challenge on his adventure list. It would kill him to turn it down, but...

He waited and waited.

And kept right on waiting.

The anticipation didn’t come. In fact he could barely manage a flicker of interest. He frowned and straightened.

‘Mate, I appreciate the offer but...’ His eyes sought out Meg on the dance floor, lowered to her baby bump. ‘I have bigger fish to fry at the moment.’

Dave shrugged. ‘Fair enough. I just wanted to run it by you.’

‘And I appreciate it.’ But what he wanted and who he was had crystallised in his mind in sharp relief. He was going to be a father and he wanted to be a
good
father—the best.

Dave clapped him on the back. ‘I’ll catch you later, Ben. It’s time to drag that gorgeous wife of mine onto the dance floor.’

Ben waved in absent acknowledgment. A smile grew inside him. He was going to be a father. Nothing could shake him from wanting to be the best one he could be. His new sense of purpose held far more power than his old dreams ever had.

* * *

Her father and Elsie left at a relatively early hour, but the party in Meg’s garden continued into the night. She danced with her girlfriends and made sure she spoke to everyone.

Everyone, that was, except Ben.

She stayed away from Ben. Tonight he was just too potent. He wore some gorgeous subtle aftershave that made her think of Omar Sharif and harems, but it didn’t completely mask the scent of leather and whisky either, and the combination made her head whirl.

Some instinct warned her that if she gave in to the temptation he represented tonight she’d be lost.

‘Meg?’ Dave touched her arm and she blinked herself back inside the marquee. ‘Winnie and I are heading off, but thanks for a great party. We had a ball.’

‘I’m glad you enjoyed yourselves. I’ll see you out.’

‘No need.’

‘Believe me, the fresh air will do me good.’

Keeping busy was the answer. Not remembering the way Ben’s eyes had practically devoured her earlier was key too. She swallowed. When he looked at her the way a man looked at a woman he found desirable he skyrocketed her temperature and had her pulse racing off the chart. He made her want to do wild reckless things.