First Light (30 page)

I didn’t move.

‘I’ll take her,’ said Ace gently, taking my hand and leading me outside to the car.

On the journey my chest ached like I needed to sob, but my eyes remained dry. My heart wouldn’t accept what was happening. I point blank refused to believe I wouldn’t see him again.

***

Ace dropped me home and said they’d get in touch. They didn’t. Nearly a week passed and there was still no sign of Kalen. I couldn’t face classes so I avoided school altogether. Study and exams were the last thing on my mind, but news I’d been attacked spread fast and once again the teachers took pity on me, only this time I took advantage of their sympathy.

Every day went by in much the same way. I’d wake up, scour the high street, pubs and beach in the hope of seeing one of the men who’d jumped us. On the third day I forced Alexandra to go with me to Cowford and we spent twelve hours moving from lunchtime pubs to evening bars and clubs. She was the only person who was sympathetic, yet it took its toll, even on her. Rachel, of course, was adamant that he’d just left again of his own accord and I hadn’t seen Mae since I got out of hospital. I knew she was still dating Taz and I was angry and hurt that she hadn’t been more understanding, but I kept promising myself I would visit her once I knew Kalen was safe. I would try to sort things out with my best friend – even if she no longer cared about our friendship, I did.

On day six I went to the mansion to find out if there was any news. The response I got left me desolate.
‘No news, Ronnie. And we’re going to leave soon if he doesn’t show up.’
That was Denver, and while he came across less upbeat than usual, there wasn’t the slightest hesitation in his tone – they were leaving and that was that. I looked at Ace, who glanced back at me contritely. My legs wobbled. If they couldn’t find him, what hope did I have?

Ace insisted on dropping me home, but even the youngest and most sympathetic had no words of comfort for me during the ride.

I’d not long been in when I heard a light tap on the door. It was Alexandra and Diana. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d looked in a mirror, but Alexandra’s mouth dropped as she took me in. She shoved me inside, wrapping her thumb and index finger around the top of my arm and grunting in disgust. ‘We’re here to cook for you.’

‘We’ll hand-feed you if we have to, you look like shit,’ Diana added. She could always be counted on to tell it how it was, but I didn’t care how I looked, or if I ate anything.

‘I’m not hungry,’ I told them, ignoring the looks of concern they exchanged.

‘I’ll force it down your throat, Ronnie, don’t think I won’t,’ said Diana.

Then Alexandra added, ‘Also, we’re taking you out this weekend, babe, this moping has to stop.’

I shook my head adamantly. ‘No way.’

‘To London. I have theatre tickets to see a show and you’re coming with. Have you ever been to London?’

‘Of course,’ I mumbled throwing myself on the sofa.

The girls stayed as long as they could. They cooked, watched me eat and cleaned up afterwards, but I didn’t make the process easy or enjoyable and soon enough they left me alone. I couldn’t blame them – I was surprised they’d lasted so long.

I went to the same window I’d sat by each night and stared out into the darkness, imagining him rounding the corner and walking up my gravel driveway. I’d questioned getting the police involved, a resounding
No
coming from the other assassins. Now I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d done that first, maybe they would have found him. Of course it could have led to their covers being blown, and Kal wouldn’t have wanted that. It was the only thing stopping me.

I stared at the full moon, wracking my brains for places Kalen might be if he were hiding or hurt. Out of nowhere an idea occurred to me. It was a long shot, but I hopped up, pushed my arms through the sleeves of my duffle coat and yanked on my Wellington boots before I could talk myself out of it. I only had on my pajama shorts, but the cold was the last thing on my mind.

I sprinted through my back garden, leaning into the chilly night air that was biting my nose and ears. The grass was wet, even though it hadn’t been raining; damp with a layer of evening dew that flicked up against my bare legs as I ran.

Stepping into the woods was the only thing that slowed me down. I couldn’t run through the thicket even if I’d wanted to. I pushed my way through, twigs cracking under my feet as I fumbled towards the clearing. I considered how afraid I used to be of the forest. I wasn’t any more. Different things frightened me now.

Finally, after pushing aside the low hanging branches blocking my way, I saw the dark silhouette of the hut rise out of the darkness.

Hesitantly, I shoved on the door and stepped inside. A hunched figure crouched in the corner of the room, hidden amongst shadows. I gasped.

‘Kal?’ I whispered.

A slight movement and the shadow spoke. ‘Don’t be scared, Red. It’s me.’

I stifled a cry and ran forward. ‘How long have you been here?’ My voice escaped in a tight rasp. I knelt by his side, trying to steady my shaking hands. He smelled like sweat and blood and when my eyes had adjusted to the blackness I could make out his face was swollen and bruised.

I reached out and touched his cheek, unable to stop the tears from tumbling down my own. I traced my finger lightly down the scar I knew so well. He closed his eyes, sighing gratefully at the contact.

‘Oh my God, Kal, I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry. Forgive me, please.’

‘Red, this isn’t your fault.’

‘Of course it is,’ my voice broke. ‘Why didn’t you go back to the mansion? I started to think you were de–’

‘It’ll take more than some drunk, overweight civilians to take me down, Red. You know me.’

From the struggled grate of his breath and the tiny decibel of his voice, I knew there was no time for my questions about why or how. I needed to get him into the house, I had to make him well again.

‘Is anything broken, can you walk?’ I asked, pulling myself together and wiping the tears from my face.

‘I will, but not yet. Sit here with me, I just want to be close to you.’

‘Kalen, come on, you made it here and I won’t let you give up now. Your friends have been worried sick, they’ve been searching nonstop for you.’

‘You’re a horrible liar, Miss Rose,’ he managed with a half smile.

I swallowed a lump in my throat. ‘They did, Kal – they did at first.’

‘It’s okay, Red, I know how it goes – we’re all the same, after all. It’s not their fault.’

‘I didn’t stop,’ I told him, wishing his life could be different. ‘Kalen, do as I say, please, no games. We have to get you inside and get you washed up, you look terrible, but nothing a bath and some food won’t fix.’ I hoped.

Eventually, he nodded. I eased his arm round my shoulder, focusing all my strength into lifting him. Slowly, I inched us forward as he forced his legs to move. He didn’t make a sound, though I could tell he was in pain. There were about two acres of garden between us and the house, but I didn’t dwell on the distance. We made our way slowly across the grass until we reached the back porch.

Once inside, things became more difficult. He wavered and I wasn’t even sure he was fully conscious, because he turned into a dead weight against me. I steadied myself on the kitchen table, took a lungful of air and shuffled us both to the living room. Knowing I’d never make it up the stairs without help, I let him fall gently on the sofa and collapsed next to him.

I only allowed myself a moment’s rest. I ran to the bedroom, grabbing pillows and a blanket. Back beside him, I straightened him out on the couch and tucked the blanket around him. I stared, wondering what to do for the best. In the lamp-lit living room I could see the purple discoloration on his face, the dark circles under his eyes and the cuts that covered most of his skin.

‘Kal,’ my voice quavered, ‘I don’t know what to do. I want to call a doctor.’

Though he didn’t reply, I saw his frown pull together at the mere mention of the word. I gulped. Internally, I cursed the boys for not owning phones. It was ludicrous – if they had at least one between them, I’d be able to call and ask their advice. But they didn't, so I needed to pull myself together. I fled for the kitchen, filled a jug with water and scurried back in to him. Rousing him wasn’t easy, but I was able to drip some water into his mouth. I hurried to the bathroom, digging through the cabinet until I found the first aid kit.

Looking after Dad when he was ill had given me a good idea on how to make someone comfortable, but it wasn't translating to Kal's injuries. Mostly, he was covered in bruises, but some of his skin was cut and the wounds seemed fairly deep. I wiped them clean as best I could, biting back my hysteria as I washed him down. Around the lacerations, his skin was either red raw, or filled with a sticky yellow liquid. I had no clue how to get rid of the infection.

I looked at his face – still unconscious – and fell back so I was sitting on the floor, praying I wasn't going to burst into tears. I felt so helpless.

With that thought, a surge of anger got me to my feet.

‘Kal,' I said, though I was fairly certain he couldn't hear me. 'I’m an idiot and I don't know what I'm doing, so I'm going to get the boys. They'll know how to help you. I'm sorry.’ Grabbing up the keys to the Land Rover, I placed a careful kiss on his forehead and shot out the front door.

I drove as quickly as I dared along the back roads, promising myself it would be the last time I did anything so illegal. Somehow, though, I wasn’t convinced it was a promise I would get to keep.

All the lights were off inside as I pulled up the gravel driveway, but knowing none of them slept particularly well, I wasn’t worried about disturbing them. I dashed up the steps, my hand poised to knock when the door swung open. Nash stood in front of me.

‘Hello, Ronnie,’ he nodded carefully, having reverted to the deadpan state I was used to before Kal had gone missing.

‘Hey,’ I said bluntly. I was getting really sick of treading on eggshells around them all. ‘I have some news: Kal’s alive, he’s at my house now.’

His aloofness disappeared and for the first time I thought he showed signs of joy. His smile combined with a relaxation of his stance told me he’d been more upset than he was letting on, so I continued more politely.

‘I need your help. He’s in a bad way,’ I choked on the last word and looked away.

Nash had more tact than to try to comfort me. He told me to get back in the car; he’d drive. He disappeared into the house and a moment later he and Denver came jogging out. Denver greeted me with a high five and a short time later – much faster than my journey over had been – we arrived back at my farmhouse. The boys carried a sleeping Kalen to my father’s bedroom opposite mine as I watched nervously. Nash seemed to take the reins after that, he stitched a cut on Kalen's chest and bandaged some of the others.

‘You did well Ronnie. By the looks of things he’s not eaten in a while, and I doubt he's had much water so that’s probably the worst of his injuries. I think you found him just in time,’ he said.

I nodded and followed them downstairs.

‘It’s okay, Ron,’ Denver whispered before they left, ‘he’s lived through a lot worse.’

I wasn’t comforted by that notion, but it was the only thought on my mind when I went to bed that night. I slept fitfully, afraid he would wake in need of my help.

Canter Creek, Iowa – January 2005

‘What happened?’

‘I don’t know, Sir. I couldn’t kill him. He – he had a family.’

The man stared at the boy in front of him, his expression unreadable. K, however, was aware of what he was thinking. He lowered his gaze.

‘He had a family,’ the bearded man repeated. ‘Mm-hmm. Well, K, this is a problem, because you’re here on God’s green earth, to do nothing else but what I order you to do. If you can’t do that, you are no good for anything.’

‘With all due respect, Sir, you know I’m good at my job–’

‘Don’t interrupt me,’ the man shot back, his first break in an otherwise affable manner.

‘Yes, Sir.’

‘You’re right,’ the man continued more calmly. ‘I may have expected this from some of the others, but not you. You, who we’ve spared no expense on training. Who we held in such high regard as the success story of this project. I’d like an explanation.’