Authors: Sara Craven
great care, and placed it neatly at the
foot of the bed. She would not be
wearing it again, she thought.
She dressed quickly and went out into
the courtyard. A clothes line had been
rigged up, and she saw her own things
drying in the sunshine, along with
garments that clearly belonged to the
children. As she stood there hesitating,
feeling the heat of the day beating down
upon her head, Maria appeared carrying
a clothes basket. Her eyes lit up when
she saw Rachel and she set the basket
down.
'Buenos dias, senorita,' she greeted her
cheerfully. 'Como esta usted?'
'Muy bien, gracias.'
It was the
conventional response, but not altogether
true, Rachel reflected as she walked
forward.
'Er—donde esta el senor?'
Maria's plump face took on a surprised
expression. She obviously expected that
Rachel would already know the answer
to that, and her reply, accompanied by
some excited gestures, was almost
incomprehensible, but Rachel thought
she was saying that he was not here, but
had gone somewhere with Ramon.
She frowned a little. She had expected
he would at least be saddling the horses
in preparation for the final stage of their
journey. She had told him how urgent it
was that she should reach Diablo. What
could have happened?
She became aware that Maria was
offering her breakfast, and made herself
smile and nod. She went into the living
area of the house and sat at the table
while Maria bustled around, preparing a
fluffy omelette. It was delicious, and so
were the crisp golden balls of maize
flour and cheese which accompanied it,
which Maria told her were
bunuelos.
Rachel drank two cups of strong black
coffee with her meal and gradually
decided she felt more human. In a way,
she was relieved that she did not have to
face Vitas immediately, for she had no
idea what she would say, or how he
would react when they did come face to
face again. The previous night had been
another humiliation, she thought bitterly.
So, he hadn't expected to find her
covered from throat to ankle in
voluminous white linen. Well, she hadn't
expected it either, but she couldn't
believe that she had looked so repulsive.
Clearly the packaging hadn't been exotic
enough to appeal to his sophisticated
tastes, she told herself. Probably he
preferred transparent black lace, which
veiled without concealing, and the
thought
made
her
feel
oddly
disappointed.
She saw Maria was watching her
furtively, and schooled her features. The
older woman was probably attributing
her rather wan appearance and heavy
eyes to a very different cause, she
realised wryly.
She glanced at her watch, and saw with
a start of horror that it was almost noon.
They should have set out hours before,
she fretted. Where was Vitas? What was
he doing? In spite of everything that had
passed between them, his primary
obligation was to take her to Diablo as
he had promised.
She wandered out on to the verandah and
stood staring up and down the dusty
track, but there was no sign of him.
Maria had followed her and stood
watching, her face creased with anxiety.
Rachel gave her a reassuring smile and
stole another look at her watch.
She spent much of the next few hours
wandering restlessly from room to room,
and out into the open air. The time
dragged, and her tentative offers of help
to Maria were, rejected with smiling
courtesy. She even tried at one point to
rest on her bed, but she tossed so much
that she decided it would be better if she
got up.
The aggravating part about it was that
Maria did not seem worried or even
vaguely concerned about the men's
absence, and her reply to all Rachel's
stumbling questions was a smiling shrug.
In the end, she went and sat on the.
verandah, rocking herself into a bigger
and better temper with every endless
minute that passed. It was about four
o'clock in the afternoon when it first
occurred to her that he might not be
coming back.
She put down the fan she had been
desultorily using to keep the flies away
and sat bolt upright.
My God, she thought, it can't be true. He
couldn't—he wouldn't just abandon me
here. Would he?
The fact that he had become almost as
necessary to her as the air she breathed
didn't disguise the other fact that she
hardly knew him. She gripped her hands
together to stop them trembling, and took
a deep breath of humid air.
Perhaps this was how it was with him.
So far and no further. Perhaps the
foothills of the eastern
cordillera
were
littered with his leavings, all sitting like
Patience on a monument and smiling at
very little.
Perhaps after a decent interval, Maria
would come and break the bad news to
her in sign language.
Oh, stop it, she admonished herself.
You're being ridiculous. If he was going
to leave you somewhere, it wouldn't be
with friends of his, especially one who
idolises him as Maria obviously does.
But nothing could alter the fact that he
had vanished without an explanation, she
argued. And his disappearance meant
their arrival in Diablo would be delayed
by at least a day.
She felt herself flush slightly. Perhaps he
had merely decided that he didn't want
her any more, and this withdrawal was
simply a tacit way of telling her so.
She got up restlessly and went back into
the house. Maria was sitting at the table,
a battered cardboard box in front of her,
and in the face of her tranquil smile,
Rachel felt ashamed of her own
agitation. After all, Ramon was missing
as well, and Maria clearly regarded it as
an everyday and acceptable occurrence,
and not the end of the world.
Maria beckoned and patted the bench
beside her invitingly. She was being
asked to go and view whatever Maria
had in that box. She felt guilty and
ashamed that Maria should deem it
necessary to have to provide some sort
of entertainment for her, but there was no
way in which she could convey these
sentiments to her hostess, so all she
could do was sit down and pretend to be
interested in whatever it was she was
being asked to see.
In the event, she did not have to pretend
the interest, because the box contained
photographs. She was shown Vitas as a
baby, Vitas as a strikingly handsome
small boy, and Vitas as an adolescent,
wearing his new disfigurement with an
arrogant courage which tugged at her
heart. The contrast between the carefree
child smiling at the camera, and the
disillusion of the young man, his face
already marked by responsibility and
suffering, was a bitter one.
There were other photographs too, many
of them family groups, and with Maria's
help she had little difficulty in picking
out his handsome dark-eyed mother and
pretty sister. The picture of his late
father affected her most deeply. She felt
she was looking at Vitas himself in
twenty years' time. There was a picture
of them together, Vitas on the back of a
pony and his father standing beside him,
with a protective hand on the bridle.
Rachel saw that Maria's eyes had filled
with tears as she handed it over, and
guessed it had been taken just before the
little family had suffered its harrowing
and frightening tragedy.
But it was the photographs of Vitas
which occupied her attention fully, and
she could not maintain the same interest
in the pictures of his sister that Maria
displayed with such pride—Juanita's
first communion, Juanita's wedding, the
baptism of her first child. But she had to
admit that she was a pretty girl with soft
smiling eyes, and no trace of the cynical,
sardonic expression which characterised
her brother.
At last Maria, sighing gustily, begun to
gather her treasured relics together again
to replace them in the box. Rachel was
helping her to collect them up when she
noticed a large manilla envelope lying
underneath them. As she picked it up to
replace it in the box, she saw the corner
of a large coloured photograph jutting
out a little way which she didn't
remember seeing. It was clearly an
oversight, she thought, as Maria had
shown her everything else her precious
box contained, and she began to pull it
out of the envelope.
'No, senorita, por favor!'
Maria
sounded incredibly agitated suddenly,
and she made an attempt to grab the
photograph out of Rachel's hands.
Instinctively Rachel recoiled, and as she
did so, she saw what Maria had not
wanted her to see. It was a big glossy
enlargement that had obviously been
taken just outside the
finca
itself, and it
was inevitably another picture of Vitas.
Clad in his usual sombre black, he
stared coolly and unsmilingly into the
camera. But he was not alone. There
was a woman with him, blonde and
petite, with the expensively well-
groomed chic of the rich American
woman. But she wasn't looking at the
camera with the normal tourist smile.
She was looking at Vitas, and if the
camera did not lie, it did not pity either,
for the expression of naked hunger on
her face was unequivocally revealed.
'Ay de mi, senorita!'
Maria wrested the
photograph out of her suddenly nerveless
fingers, and stuffed it back in the
envelope. She looked flushed and
unhappy, and guilty as if she had
revealed a secret that was not her own to
tell.
Rachel was oddly glad that she and
Maria did not share a common language,
and that there could be no apologies or
attempted
explanations
or
other
recriminations. It also meant she could
not be tempted to degrade herself by
asking Maria about the woman.
She knew all that she needed to know
already, she thought. Ramirez had given
her the outlines of the whole sordid little
episode back in Asuncion. And she
could fill in the rest of the details from
the photograph itself which, even in the
brief glimpse she had had of it, seemed
to have etched itself irrevocably on her
memory.
So Vitas had brought his American lover
here. Well, it made a kind of sense, and
explained why Maria had seemed
neither
shocked
nor
particularly
surprised by her own arrival. Perhaps
she was used to acting as lady's maid for
his women, she thought desolately, and
kept a selection of nightwear for their
use.
She rose abruptly and went to the door,
staring out at the dusty sunlight with
unseeing eyes. There was a tightness in
her throat and a burning sensation behind
her eyelids. She wanted to throw herself
down on the rough boards of the
verandah and scream and drum her
heels, because the thought of Vitas with
another woman, holding her, caressing
her, brought a surge of bitter jealousy in
its wake.
She had not known she could feel such
pain, or care so deeply.
But I'm not the first to feel like this, she
told
herself,
her
mind
returning
remorselessly to the photograph. It had
not been taken to mark the beginning of
their relationship, but the end, she knew.
And if she allowed herself to love him,