Flowers on the Mersey (30 page)

Rebekah eased her back. ‘I’m making sure I’m well prepared. I feel so enormous that I’m sure this baby’s twins and they’re playing football.’

Edwina sighed. ‘All mums-to-be feel huge at the end. Have you decided whether to be confined at home or in hospital? More mums are opting for a hospital birth these days – nice and sanitary.’

‘Joshua says home.’ Rebekah grimaced. ‘I’m to have the doctor and a nurse afterwards. I must admit to feeling more than a bit nervous. Is it as painful as they say? Because the doctor says that I can have an injection of scopolamine and morphine if the pains get bad.’

‘Twilight sleep. I’ve read about it in a brochure.’ Edwina sat on the rocking chair and looked up at Rebekah. ‘It’s said to shorten labour and help with the milk.’

‘Then you think it’s worth trying?’

Edwina said softly. ‘If things get bad, you’ll beg for it.’

Rebekah paled and put a hand over her swollen stomach. ‘I’ll bear anything as long as he doesn’t die.’

‘Not as many babies do die these days. But you’re sure it’s going to be a boy?’

Rebekah laughed suddenly. ‘Girls don’t play football.’

Edwina smiled. ‘There’ll come a day when nothing will stop us women doing anything we want.’

‘I still think you’re a suffragette at heart,’ said Rebekah, still smiling as she shut the drawer. ‘Come and have a cup of tea.’

Edwina rose from the chair and they went downstairs arm in arm.

Two days later Rebekah went into what she called premature labour and there was no time for twilight sleep. She gave birth to a six pound fourteen ounce son, and a smiling Joshua came into the room as the baby was laid in her arms. ‘Michaels says it’s a boy.’

‘He’s beautiful!’ A sore but not too exhausted Rebekah marvelled as she gazed into the red little face with the screwed up eyes.

‘He’s ugly and dark-haired!’ exclaimed Joshua, his smile fading slightly. ‘I thought he’d be fair – and he hasn’t the Greens’ nose.’

The nurse looked up at him as she folded a towel. ‘I’ve seen babies with hair as dark as dark can be, sir, end up as fair as Goldilocks. First lot of hair often falls out.’

‘I see.’ He sat on the edge of the bed and touched the baby’s cheek. ‘He has blue-grey eyes, though?’

‘Yes. But eyes can change colour.’

‘Good God!’ Joshua stared at the baby. ‘I hope he doesn’t change into a girl,’ he said with deliberate humour.

The nurse smiled condescendingly. ‘Now that would be a miracle! It’s a fine boy you’ve got there.’

‘He’s lovely,’ said Rebekah, her arms tightening protectively about her son, and hiding her expression from Joshua. ‘Thank you, nurse, for everything. And I must thank Doctor Michaels. I didn’t have chance to do so before.’

The nurse smiled. ‘He said you were a woman of good sense. No screeching, and you did as you were told.’

Joshua looked gratified. ‘I should hope no wife of mine would kick up a fuss. But well done, dear.’ He kissed Rebekah’s forehead.’ I’ll leave you with nurse now and go and phone the good news to a few people.’ He added with unaccustomed consideration, ‘If you don’t mind, I might need to go out for a while?’

‘Don’t worry about me,’ said Rebekah cheerfully. ‘I’ll be glad to rest.’

‘Of course.’ He waggled his fingers in her direction before disappearing behind the open door.

Nurse and Rebekah smiled at each other. ‘Best place for husbands, out of the way,’ said the nurse.
‘Now let me take baby and you have your rest.’

Reluctantly Rebekah handed over her child and relaxed against the pillows. Thank God for nurse! But was it true that eyes could change colour? She did not allow the question to plague her. At least she had been safely delivered of Daniel’s son. She wondered what he would do if he knew about his child. For a moment she was sad and then her gaze wanderd to the baby’s crib, and turning over carefully, she was asleep in minutes.

Rebekah’s son was christened Adam Joshua David, and as soon as she was fit and Brigid had a day off, she wheeled him in his pram to call on her friend.

‘He’s gorgeous,’ said Brigid, a dreamy expression on her face as she rocked the wide-eyed baby who was sucking his fist.

Rebekah smiled. ‘You’ll have to get one of your own.’

Brigid turned pink. ‘I’ll get married first. What does Joshua think of him?’

‘He’s as proud as punch.’ Rebekah sat in a chair, unbuttoned her blouse and held out her arms for her child. ‘Although he still doesn’t like David’s hair being black. He wants it fair and so it should be fair.’ She began to suckle the baby, looking down at him with a gentle expression on her face.

Brigid sat opposite her. ‘But David has blue eyes. Isn’t he happy with that?’

‘They’re changing colour,’ said Rebekah quietly. ‘They’re going darker.’

‘Oh!’ Brigid looked into the baby’s face. ‘What does he think about that?’

‘He hasn’t said anything.’ She rubbed her cheek against the baby’s downy head.

‘Perhaps he hasn’t noticed?’

‘Nurse remarked on it in front of him.’

Brigid’s face clouded. ‘Do yer think he has any suspicions?’

‘If he has, he’s keeping them to himself for the moment. Just as I kept quiet my suspicions of his going with prostitutes when I was expecting. I discovered some rubber sheaths inside a pair of his socks and he was often out in the evenings. With that sort of woman, he’d be scared of catching something.’

Her friend frowned. ‘He hasn’t been violent, has he?’

‘Raised his hand and his voice.’ Rebekah lifted her head. ‘He doesn’t like the baby crying. Nor does he like me breast feeding. He goes on about me putting David on the bottle but I have nurse on my side.’ A smile lifted her mouth. ‘She says mother’s breast is best and it really embarrasses him.’

‘He’s jealous of yer giving all yer attention to the baby. But as long as he doesn’t suspect that David is Daniel’s.’

Rebekah’s arm tightened about her son. ‘If he attempts to hurt David, I couldn’t stay with him. At the moment I’m resigned to living with him, but there might come a time—’

‘Well, yer know what to do if things get tough.’

Rebekah’s eyes softened. ‘I’m a real trial to you, aren’t I, love?’

‘Yer a right nuisance,’ said Brigid in a gruff voice. ‘I’ll make us a cup of tea.’

Rebekah smiled and no more was said on the subject of Joshua.

David thrived and Rebekah did most things for him except his washing. She found caring for him a joy, but worried when Joshua played with him. Sometimes her husband would pick David up, gaze into his face, then toss him into the air. She would hold her breath and start forward because he did not put out his arms to catch the child until he almost reached the ground. Twice she spoke to Joshua sharply and he turned on her. ‘Do you think I would drop my own son?’

‘No,’ she said quietly, conscious of the aggression in his voice.

Often Rebekah was aware of Joshua’s eyes on her when she was nursing the baby, and she tensed, waiting for him to make some comment but he never did and she could only feel relief when he took himself off somewhere. The weeks passed and she was as happy as she ever could be parted from Daniel.

It was one May day when Rebekah had been to
visit Brigid and was walking home, that Mr McIntyre called to her, waving a newspaper: ‘The Civil War’s over!’

A smile spread over her face. ‘That’s good news.’

‘Well, everything’s been going to pieces, hasn’t it?’ He leant on the gate. ‘They’ll have to sort something workable out.’

Rebekah thought of Daniel. ‘Peace in Ireland,’ she murmured. ‘It seems almost unbelievable.’

‘Aye, well, people can’t be fighting forever.’ He grinned. ‘Are you coming in for a cup of tea?’

‘Thanks but I better hadn’t. I want to call in on my aunt and then I’ll have to rush home. I’ve been out all afternoon.’

He looked disappointed. ‘Perhaps next time?’

‘Yes.’ She waved her hand and went on her way.

Esther was pleased to see her and the baby. ‘Where’s my precious little boy?’ she cooed over the pram. ‘Can I have a hold of him?’

‘Your precious little boy is wet,’ said Rebekah promptly. ‘I’ll have to change him.’

For a moment her aunt’s face showed distaste then she smiled. ‘He can’t help it, the little love. I’ll get Hannah to make us a cup of tea. Then I want to talk to thee, Rebekah.’

She looked at her aunt, wondering what Hannah had been up to this time, but Esther’s conversation had nothing to do with the maid.

‘I’ve made a will, Rebekah, and I’m leaving all my
money to your son. I know thee must be wondering why I haven’t left it to thee, but—’ Her aunt paused and her mouth tightened. ‘I’m not the fool thy husband thinks me. I’m not chancing him getting his hands on it – which he might if I left it to thee. I’ve tied it up so he won’t be able to touch it.’

‘Good for you, Aunt Esther!’ Rebekah could not be annoyed with her, although expectations of her aunt’s money had occasionally figured in her own plans. She balanced her half-naked son on her hip, rose from her seat and kissed her aunt. ‘You can’t realise how happy it makes me. At least he’ll be secure.’

Esther flushed and said unsteadily, ‘Thou might have thy faults, Rebekah, but I’ve watched thee and thou loves the baby and hast the makings of a good mother. Even Hannah has admitted that and she knows about such things. Sarah would have been proud of thee. If only Papa had lived to see this great-grandson of his, he too would have been proud.’

Rebekah did not know what to say, so kissed her aunt again.

She was smiling when she left the house but as she neared the park her expression became sombre. She dreaded facing Joshua. He had started pawing her in bed but she had continued to bind herself underneath, telling him that the bleeding after the birth had not stopped. Surely it would not be long before he realised that she was pretending?

His car was in front of the house but Janet opened the door. ‘Mr Green’s upstairs,’ she answered in response to Rebekah’s question.

‘Is he in a good mood,’ she whispered.

‘The cat’s in hiding,’ muttered Janet. ‘That says something.’

Rebekah grimaced. ‘Where’s Nurse?’

‘Gone,’ said Janet succinctly.

‘Gone where?’

‘Gone for good.’ Janet jerked her head upwards. ‘The master told her to pack her bags and paid her off.’

Rebekah felt a sudden chill. David whimpered. ‘Has my husband mentioned anything happening to one of his ships?’

‘Never a word. And there’s nothing in the
Echo
.’

Rebekah gnawed her lower lip. ‘Open the back gate and I’ll go into the garden.’

She wheeled the pram round and settled herself in a chair. As she fed David, she gazed unseeingly at the mermaid figurehead, wondering what the dismissal of the nurse meant. Was it money, or was there some deeper reason behind her being sent off?

There was a sound at the french windows and she turned and saw Joshua. He lit a cheroot and came slowly towards her. ‘Nurse has gone.’

‘Janet told me.’

She determined not to ask why but he answered her unspoken question. ‘I didn’t see why you needed
help with the boy. You spend enough time with him yourself.’

‘That’s all right.’ She flashed him a smile. ‘I’ll manage. When I was on Outdoor Relief I saw women coping with five and six children without help.’

‘Slum children,’ he said disparagingly.

Rebekah stared at him. ‘I thought you cared about the children and the work of the Seamen’s Orphanage?’

His eyes narrowed against the smoke. ‘I was taught that it was my duty to show an interest. My father also told me that a man often has to grin and bear things.’

‘Men aren’t the only ones.’ she murmured.

‘What’s that mean?’ He scowled. ‘What have you to complain about?’

‘Did I complain?’

‘It sounded like a complaint.’ He looked disgruntled. ‘If anyone has cause for complaint, it’s me. You’re always cuddling that baby. He’ll be spoilt. It’s not good for children to be picked up all the time.’ He moved suddenly and wrenched David out of her arms. The child gave a startled whimper as he was dragged from her breast and she cried with pain and attempted to regain possession of him.

‘I’m feeding him,’ she said angrily. ‘Be careful of that cigar!’

‘You’re always feeding him,’ growled Joshua, pressing David against him and staring at her bared breast. ‘There’s never any time for me.’

‘You’d rather he starved?’ She pulled together the edges of her blouse.

‘Go on, cover yourself up! Never anything for me these days!’

She looked away from him. ‘You wanted a baby.’

‘Yes, I did. But I didn’t expect it to take you over. Another woman would have been happy to leave it all to the nurse, but not you. You’re going to have to learn that I won’t put up with it forever. You can put him to bed now and give me some of your time. And by the way, I’ve moved his crib out of our room.’ He offered David to her then feigned dropping him as she put out her arms.

She caught him quickly. ‘Why do you do that?’ she said in a seething voice. ‘One of these days—’

‘One of these days I might drop him, were you going to say?’ muttered Joshua, stubbing out his cheroot on the place the mermaid would have had a bottom if she did not have a tail. ‘Maybe not if you put him on the bottle and give me some of what he’s been getting.’

She flushed. ‘I want to feed him myself. He’s my son!’

‘He might be yours but is he mine?’ Joshua lit another cheroot.

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ Rebekah’s voice was cool despite her heart’s beginning to race.

‘His eyes are changing colour. If I believed—’

‘Believed what?’

‘He doesn’t look like me.’

‘He’s only a baby.’ She placed David in his pram.

‘I’ve often heard people say “Doesn’t he look like his father?” of babies.’ His eyes glinted. ‘And there’s another thing. I don’t like you calling him David.’

She was ready for that one. ‘I prefer it to Adam. Papa and I weren’t always on the best of terms.’

‘I suppose you prefer David because it’s the nearest you dare get to Daniel?’ he snapped.

She stared at him, thinking how often she stopped on the brink of an argument. She did so now, saying in a controlled voice: ‘David was the Old Testament hero – and eventually a king. I thought it fitting.’

His face reddened. ‘You’re pushing your luck, Rebekah. I know my Bible. I’m still king of this castle, not that child. It’s something you forget.’

‘How could I? You lord it over me whenever you can.’

‘I’m your husband! I have rights.’ He tossed his cheroot in a flower bed and before she could think of moving away, seized hold of her arms and thrust his face close to hers. ‘What were you doing in Ireland last summer? Why did you really go? Did you soothe any rebels’ brows? O’Neill’s for instance?’ It was so sudden that Rebekah could not think what to say for a moment. ‘Well?’ he demanded.

For a moment she was tempted to fling the truth in his face but common sense asserted itself. She had David’s safety to consider. ‘Is this some sick joke?
You told me Daniel was dead. Has he suddenly come alive again?’

For a moment he was silent, his anger digging into her upper arms, then he muttered. ‘Put the boy to bed. I want some of your attention for a change.’

Rebekah did as she was told, dreading the hours ahead, but it was not as bad as she feared. A business acquaintance of Joshua’s called and the men talked shipping and the slump in trade while the level in a bottle of whisky fell. Rebekah slipped away to feed David and stayed in the nursery. She was still there, gazing out of the open window over the moonlit garden, when Joshua came and stood in the doorway.

‘Why aren’t you in bed? You should be in bed.’ His words were slurred.

‘I’m coming.’ Rebekah tried to inch past him but he took hold of her and pulled her close. Whisky fumes fanned her cheek and she recoiled. ‘How much have you drunk?’

‘Not enough not to know what to do with you. You should have had a drink with us, my sweet. The alcohol might make you more friendly.’

‘I didn’t want a drink,’ she murmured, trying to free herself. ‘But if it’s what makes you happy.’

‘I’m not happy.’ He swayed as he clung to her and said against her ear, ‘You could make me happy if you—’ He whispered a suggestion.

‘No!’ She tried to pull away but he kept hold of her.

‘You did it when we were first married! You did! You did!’ he cried petulantly.

Anger stirred inside her. ‘Only because you forced me. I’m not doing it now! Now let me go before you wake the baby.’

‘Damn and blast the baby,’ he shouted, shaking her. ‘I’ve been patient, staying away from you, and now I want what’s my right!’

‘Keep your voice down,’ stuttered Rebekah. ‘Do you want to wake the whole neighbourhood?’

‘I damn well don’t care!’ He slapped her across the face.

Her hand went to her cheek and there was a churning inside her. ‘Don’t you hit me!’

‘And how are you going to stop me?’ he sneered.

She kicked his ankle and they began to struggle. He yelled insults at her and she screeched at him, not caring what she said but fighting like one demented, hating him for all he had put her through. The baby’s crying brought her back to her senses. ‘Now look what you’ve done,’ she panted. ‘Let me go to him.’

‘No! Let me!’ Joshua pushed her against the wall and went over the crib. He snatched up David and went over to the open window and held him out.

Rebekah screamed and darted across the room, hovering around Joshua, terrified to touch him. ‘Don’t drop him! Please, don’t drop him!’

He glanced over his shoulder and there was a
triumphant look on his face. ‘What’ll you give me if I don’t?’

She did not hesitate. ‘Anything!’

‘What I asked before?’

She nodded.

‘Give me your word. I don’t trust you.’

‘I swear it.’

He brought the baby in and gave him to Rebekah. David’s screams turned to whimpers as she hushed and rocked him.

‘Just put him in his crib,’ ordered Joshua, still smiling.