Flying with the Rich and Famous: True Stories from the Flight Attendant who flew with them (16 page)

Cairo, Egypt

I flew the better part of four years for my favorite owner, Jim Williams, chairman and CEO of Golden State Foods, now retired. Based in Southern California, GSF is the second largest food supplier for McDonald’s and was integral to the growth of McDonald’s. GSF has twelve distribution and production plants in the United States, Australia, and Egypt. I really felt like I hit the jackpot with this flight department; I loved working for Jim
Williams, his colleagues, his wife, and their friends, and the pilots and engineer. Incidentally, he is one of Roger Penske’s good friends and was a sponsor for one of his racecar teams.

While I was in his employ we began traveling to Egypt for the new bakery and distribution center. The Egyptian military would stand guard at our aircraft every waking minute we were not with it. We had three militia at three different points on the aircraft at all times, one on the nose and one on each wing and engine; an obvious indication that we were in a precarious place.

We stayed at an old-castle-turned-hotel that was really quite fabulous, with many amenities. We were not allowed to drink the water or even brush our teeth with it, nor was it recommended to shave in case of a cut. I brought a case of Evian water with us and passed them out upon landing. The pool was huge, surrounded by a giant patio area and a gym, which was always a favorite pastime of mine. Behind the pool was a little spa where I could get a thirty-minute massage for fifteen US dollars—I frequently took advantage of this.

I would sit by the pool and try using the Spanish/Italian translation tool to communicate, although in Egypt it wasn’t as effective as in Greece. Just for kicks, I decided to call my father while he was at work; he was a Superior court judge at that time. His bailiff interrupted the case he was trying and told him I was on the phone, calling from Egypt. That phone call cost me $125, dumb girl, should have brought him back a $125 present instead! But, he still tells this story, so I guess it was worth it.

When we first began to travel to Egypt, Mr. Williams hired a driver/bodyguard to watch over the crew, as he knew that the flight engineer and I would not stay in our rooms and he was concerned for our welfare—probably his as well. Regardless, we had a car and driver at our disposal. We rode camels to the pyramids, which are truly exquisite and mind-boggling to think that they were created so long ago with what must have been agonizing labor.

From my hotel room window, I could see families living on tiny boats on the Nile. I wondered why they lived on boats
when the Nile was so brown and smelly. The families who live on the Nile are fisherman; they live on fish, bread, and tea. The river was brown because of sediment, and the smell was from raw sewage and pollution. It really did stink.

For a shopping experience, we went into the depths of the bazaar; it was a giant maze of shops filled with glass perfume bottles, hookah pipes, authentic Egyptian cotton, and handmade wares of all sorts. The poverty was sickening. If you were caught stealing, they would chop off a hand, caught a second time and the other hand goes. I saw people moving about on skateboards with no hands or feet, it was horrifying.

One thing I used to do with my time on layovers was play roulette. I’ve played roulette all over the world. I adore it because I don’t have to pay close attention, and I like to people watch, especially in a foreign country. My mother taught me a system to play roulette when I was a teenager, and I have been using it ever since. I must confess it works seven times out of ten.

I didn’t even realize you could gamble in Egypt, but
when I found out there was a casino in the basement of our hotel, I decided to try my luck. I wasn’t just the only American there; I was also the only woman. I thought briefly about leaving because I had this slightly eerie feeling, but I very much was in the mood to play roulette so I stuffed the feeling on a backburner and began to play and then to win.

I won a lot of money and a lot of attention. A gentlemen next to me happened to be a sultan of some sort and was obviously well-respected not only in the casino, but from what I learned later, most of Egypt. He was intrigued by me, my roulette system, and what I was doing in Egypt, in the basement of a very old castle, gambling. He would not stop asking me questions. Eventually he stopped playing and just watched me, perhaps playing the part of my bodyguard.

He asked me if I wanted to go to some exclusive, hotspot bar. A valet delivered a sparkling brand-new Rolls Royce. We drove to the club, a place you can’t go unless you’re well-connected and not at all if you’re an American. The club itself
was exquisite, although kind of weird too. There were lots of couches with draperies hanging very low from the ceiling, all decorated in reds and browns. My escort told me all about the great city of Cairo - he was a walking, talking history lesson. The reason all of the above is here is because I learned it from the Sultan. In the middle of my Egyptian culture class, I looked up and there was—you guessed it—my boss, Mr. Williams! I had beaten him to the hotspot. Yikes, time to go…

Sydney, Australia

On another trip with Jim Williams, this one around the Pacific Rim, I was wandering around Sydney, Australia and was drawn to a unique store. I found a five foot giraffe which was hand-carved from African balsawood and is exquisite. After I purchased it, they wrapped it and wrapped it so it looked like a giant cigar and I carried it back to my hotel - which was no easy task – trying to balance the awkward giant cigar on my shoulder.

The next morning when I met the pilots for the taxi ride back to the airport, they weren’t too pleased that
that thing
was
coming with us. It had to sit across our laps in the back. And then when Mr. Williams, arrived at the airplane ready for the lengthy flight back to the States. He said: “I don’t know what the hell that thing is, but if we get stopped at customs in Honolulu, I am going to be pissed.” We got stopped, he was pissed. But, not that pissed, I still had a job. (It did take them almost thirty minutes to unwrap it!) I love that giraffe; it has a red bow tie, a broken but glued neck and a permanent home. To be fair, I did purchase a lot of stuff while flying with Jim and GSF. Sometimes the baggage area was packed with my crap. I usually prayed he wouldn’t look back there – but he always did!

Singapore, Singapore

On one of my Pacific Rim trips we were getting ready to leave Singapore. Well, we were, the plane was not. The flight engineer could not fix our broken plane without a new part. Well, you know how that goes. We were stuck there waiting for a part to arrive. The passengers took a commercial flight to the next country and we stayed until the part was delivered. I wasn’t
ready to leave Singapore anyway. It’s one of my favorite places. So, I began to explore every nook and cranny of that island.

When I was growing up, we always went to our favorite lake where everybody waterskied. I still very much enjoy the sport, so I was thoroughly delighted to discover I could go water skiing in Singapore. I jumped into a taxi and was whisked away to the outskirts of the island in the straights between Singapore and Malaysia.

It wasn’t much of a beach, more like where the edge of the jungle meets the water. The water was brownish and murky, but scrumptiously warm and flat—razor blade flat, not a ripple of activity. I climbed aboard a dilapidated boat with two locals, donned my life vest, was given an old rope and an even older ski and set off on another adventure. I skied for a long, long while, until I thought my hands were going to be permanently damaged as the handle slid a centimeter at a time down my fingers and eventually, I just could not hold on anymore. It was a perfect and glorious outing, what a fantastic way to spend my time! As I
climbed back into the boat, the locals told me it was a good thing I didn’t fall because of all the crocodiles in the water! Uh, excuse me? To this day I do not know if they were joking or not.

By the way, Singapore is also a uniquely situated and a humungous port. The shopping is incredible and Lucky Plaza is a must stop and shop destination when in that country. The same holds true of Panama with all the barges traveling through. If the containers are seized because of incorrect or questionable labels, the items are sold in the local malls at a considerable discount. While in Singapore, I had to buy a new suitcase for all the new clothes, shoes and purses I found at very inexpensive prices. In Panama, I purchased board shorts for my young son for $1.00 per piece and jeans for me for $6.00. Seriously -the shopping is unbelievable!

Side note on Panama: there are many Americans in Panama that are hiding there evading U.S. Income tax. It is an unincorporated US territory and is known as a “flag of convenience”, making it an ideal tax haven. 2008 Presidential
Candidate John McCain was born here in 1936 - his eligibility to run for US President was questioned and obviously answered in his favor.

One time when we arrived at the Marriott, there was a gentleman in the lobby; I would almost bet he was waiting for other Americans to show up. He was the one who took us all over that fine city. So, if you’re in Panama – look around the lobby, make friends. You might get a suitcase full of cheap clothes out of it!

One other thing about Singapore: it is home to a statue of a lion head and a mermaid tail at the entrance to the magnificent harbor. This “merlion” is the symbol of the country and quite prevalent within it. It shoots a fountain of water out of its mouth and is very cool to see on arrival, especially at night.

Toluca, Mexico

An unusual place I frequented in the early 1990s was Toluca, Mexico. I found the most amazing shoe place in Toluca. It was maybe a half square mile of shoe stands. This was during
the era of cowboy boots, and they had some outrageously unique ones. All kinds of weird skins I’d never seen before. The prices were so cheap. I couldn’t believe my luck. GSF had business in Toluca, and we went there often. I decided to bring back cowboy boots for everyone, but the sizes were wacky. When I was home, I would trace the person’s foot I was buying for and take the traced footprint and measure it to the boot. It worked most of the time but not always. I also bought loads of leather coats and belts and purses, what a coup!

Of course, you have to watch your exchange rate. One needs a pocket calculator unless you’re with one of those pilots who can tell you the cost in dollars lickety- split, and is willing to trail behind you, a walking, talking calculator—gotta love these guys!

Chapter 6: Welcome to Life on the Road

The Perks of Being a Private Flight Attendant

I have flown with all kinds of people. Most of them were courteous and kind. Most of them were fabulous passengers but didn’t do much beyond that. But some of them did. If I was flying full time for a corporation then I was part of the family, so to speak, and was treated as such. If I was an independent contractor but still worked every trip, then I was usually part of the family as well. If I was the regular flight attendant on a jet with infrequent passengers, then the passengers knew they were going to see me and were typically pleased. And if it was a charter, no one knew anyone, but no one could have been someone!

Sometimes, I received some amazing benefits. For instance, one of our flights had a name like Joe Smith or something and he turned out to be a famous producer. The
rampers accidently took my luggage off the airplane with the producers and loaded it into the limousine. Once I figured out my bag was missing, we had to drive to his house in New Jersey to retrieve it. Feeling terrible about the inconvenience, he gave us three front row seats to a Broadway show.

I was given tickets to all kinds of events: grand openings, famous comedy shows, concerts, as well as legendary sports and golf tournaments. I was also given reservations at famous supper houses when the owners’ plans would change and they couldn’t go. They would even pick up the tab, albeit, by expense report.

I had an owner who would obtain tickets for us to Broadway shows in New York when no one could get tickets to “the” play of the time. He also acquired tickets to the hottest shows in Las Vegas. The seats were always great, and it always made us feel special.

One time we stayed at the Waldorf Astoria in New York to babysit the luggage. The passengers were going directly from the airplane to some event and couldn’t check in right away. I
made sure their baggage was in their room and clothing hung in the closet. The perks of that—a weekend at the Waldorf!

Jim Williams, at Golden State Foods, would put us up at his hotel when we were out of the country, he didn’t want us to get sick. On the way to Egypt, we would have to overnight somewhere for crew rest. We stayed in some amazing airport hotels in countries like Sweden and Switzerland. Incidentally, he also gave me a lapel pin that allowed me to go anywhere inside any Indy Car circuit race, even to the pits.

I was headed to Las Vegas for a long weekend—a trip I had flown dozens of times—and was given tickets to an Eagles concert. I wasn’t familiar with the venue and had no idea where it was located in relation to my hotel. It turned out to be a well-worn outdoor arena reminiscent of a fairground with bench-like seating. It was sizzling hot, so hot you began to sweat as soon as you entered the stadium even though it was at night. I checked my ticket and made my way towards the stage to a seat smack dab in the middle of the twelfth row. Everyone was dancing on
their seats and hooting and hollering. I had never seen the Eagles perform live, and this will remain the best concert I have ever seen, heat and all. The only bummer was they ran out of beer, but the beer was warm anyway.

On another long weekend in Vegas, Jim Williams’ wife, Toni, found out it was my birthday. She instructed me to go to the spa in our hotel because she had arranged a birthday present. I went to the spa as soon as we arrived and, to my sincere delight and amazement, I learned she had purchased a massage and facial for me! When she boarded the airplane for our return to Southern California she had presents for me too, elaborately wrapped, the whole nine yards. How many times can you say thank you without becoming annoying?