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Authors: William Montgomerie

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BOOK: Folk Tales of Scotland
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M
URCHAG AND
M
IONACHAG

URCHAG
and Mionachag went to gather fruit, and as Murchag gathered Mionachag ate.
Murcehag went to find a stick to beat Mionachag as she was eating his share of the fruit.

‘What’s the news today?’ said the stick to Murchag.

‘I’m looking for a stick to beat Mionachag, for she’s eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get me,’ said the stick, ‘until you find an axe to cut me down.’

So Murchag went on till he met an axe.

‘What’s the news today?’ said the axe.

‘I’m looking for an axe to cut the stick to beat Mionachag, who is eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get me,’ said the axe, ‘till you find a whetting stone to sharpen me.’

So Murchag went on till he found a stone.

‘What’s your news today?’ said the stone.

‘I’m looking for a stone to sharpen the axe, that will cut down the stick I need to beat Mionachag, for she’s eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get me,’ said the stone, ‘till you get water to wet me.’ So Murchag went to the water.

‘What’s your news today?’ said the water.

‘I’m looking for water that will wet the stone, that will sharpen the axe, that will cut down the stick that I need to beat Mionachag, who is eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get me,’ said the water, ‘till you find a deer to swim me.’ So Murchag caught a deer.

‘What’s your news today?’ said the deer.

‘I’m looking for a deer to swim the water, that will wet the stone, that will sharpen the axe, that will cut down the stick to beat Mionachag, who is eating my share of the
fruit.’

‘Then you’ll not get me,’ said the deer, ‘till you find a dog to chase me.’ So Murchag found a dog.

‘What’s your news today?’ said the dog.

‘I’m looking for a dog that will chase the deer, that will swim the water, that will wet the stone, that will sharpen the axe that will cut down the stick to beat Mionachag, who is
eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get me,’ said the dog, ‘till you get butter to rub on my paws.’ So Murchag got some butter.

‘What’s your news today?’ said the butter.

‘I need butter to rub on the paws of the dog so that he’ll chase after the deer, that will swim the water, that will wet the stone, that will sharpen the axe, that will cut down the
stick to beat Mionachag, who is eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get me,’ said the butter, ‘till you find a mouse to nibble me.’ So Murchag found a mouse.

‘What’s your news today?’ said the mouse.

‘I’m looking for a mouse to nibble the butter, that will be rubbed on to the paws of the dog, that will chase the deer, that will swim the water, that will wet the stone, that will
sharpen the axe, that will cut the stick to beat Mionachag, who is eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get me,’ said the mouse, ‘till you find a cat to hunt me.’ So Murchag found a cat.

‘What’s the news today?’ said the cat.

‘I’m looking for a cat to hunt the mouse, that will nibble the butter, that will be rubbed on the paws of the dog, that will chase the deer, that
will swim the
water, that will wet the stone, that will sharpen the axe, that will cut the stick to beat Mionachag, who is eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get me,’ said the cat, ‘till you get me some milk.’ So Murchag went on till he met a cow.

‘What’s your news today?’ said the cow.

‘I need milk to give to the cat, so that she’ll hunt the mouse that will nibble the butter, to be rubbed into the paws of the dog, that will chase the deer, that will swim the water,
that will wet the stone, that will sharpen the axe, to cut the stick to beat Mionachag, who is eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get milk from me,’ said the cow, ‘unless you fetch me hay from the gillie in the byre.’ So Murchag went to the cowherd.

‘What’s your news today?’ said the cowherd.

‘I’ve come for hay to give the cow, so that she’ll give milk for the cat, that’ll hunt the mouse, that’ll nibble the butter, that’ll be rubbed on the paws of
the dog, that’ll chase the deer, that’ll swim the water, that’ll wet the stone, that’ll sharpen the axe, that’ll cut the stick, that will beat Mionachag, who is eating
my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get hay from me,’ said the cowherd, ‘till you fetch me a bannock from the farmer’s wife.’ So Murchag went to the farmer’s wife, who was
kneading oatmeal bannocks in the kitchen.

‘What’s the news today, Murchag?’ said she.

‘I’m wanting a bannock for the cowherd, so that he’ll give me hay for the cow, so that she’ll give me milk for the cat, that’ll hunt the mouse, that’ll nibble
the butter, that’ll grease the paws of the dog, that’ll chase the deer, that’ll swim the water, that’ll wet the stone, that’ll sharpen the axe, that’ll cut the
stick, that’ll beat Mionachag, who is eating my share of the fruit.’

‘You’ll not get a bannock from me,’ said the goodwife, ‘till you fetch me some water in this sieve to knead the oatmeal.’

So poor Murchag took the sieve to the burn and tried to fill it with water. But as fast as he filled it, out ran the water through the holes.

Just then a hoodie flew over and croaked:

‘Gawr-rag, gawr-rag, gawr-rag, little silly!’

‘You’re right, hoodie, you’re right,’ sighed Murchag, ‘but what can I do?’

‘Plug the holes with red clay! Gawr, gawr-rag, gawr-rag!’

So Murchag took some clay from the edge of the burn, and plugged the holes of the sieve with it. Then he filled it with water, the water stayed in the sieve, and he took it to the goodwife. She
mixed it with the oatmeal and kneaded it, and baked it into a good oatmeal bannock, which he took to the cowherd.

The cowherd ate the bannock, and gave Murchag the hay, the cow ate the hay and gave him some milk, the cat drank the milk and hunted the mouse, the mouse nibbled the butter, that greased the
paws of the dog, the dog chased the deer, that swam the water, that wet the stone, that sharpened the axe, that cut the stick which Murchag took to beat Mionachag for eating his share of the
fruit.

But when Murchag found Mionachag, she had
BURST
!

P
EERIE
F
OOL

HERE
were once a King and Queen in Rousay, who lived in a castle with their three bonny
daughters. One day the King died and another King took his place, so that the widow Queen and her daughters had to leave the castle and live in a small cottage. All they had was a field, a cow and
a kaleyard full of green cabbages.

All went well until, one day, they noticed that some of the kale had disappeared. Next day more had gone, and on the third day only half was left.

‘Someone is stealing our kale,’ said the eldest Princess. ‘I’m going to keep watch tonight and catch the thief.’

So that night, she wrapped her cloak round her and hid in the garden. The moon rose in the sky and a Giant strode up and leaned over the dry-stone dyke, which just came up to his ankle-bone. He
cut some kale and threw it into his large basket. When she saw this, the Princess was very angry. She jumped up and shouted:

‘Stop taking our kale!’

‘Hold your tongue, lass, or I’ll take you too!’ cried the Giant.

‘You’ll do no such thing!’ said she.

But, without a word, the Giant picked her up and threw her into the basket, on top of the kale. And away he went, over the hills, till he came to his house. He bumped the basket down on the
stone floor.

‘Come on, out you get!’ he roared. ‘It’s past sunrise and there’s work to be done. I’ll not have an idle lass about my house.’

‘What will you have me do?’ asked the Princess.

‘First, you must milk the cow and drive her on to the hill to graze. Then you must work that wool, wash it, comb it, and spin it. When you’ve spun it, you must weave it into cloth.
And mind it’s ready when I come back tonight.’

The Princess milked the cow and drove her on to the hill to graze, but when she saw the great heap of wool, she was at her wits’ end, and didn’t know where to begin. So she made
herself a bowl of porridge.

She was sitting supping the porridge, when in ran a crowd of Wee Folk with yellow hair and wee pointed faces. They gathered round singing:

‘If you’re kind, you’ll give us a sup,

A greedy one will send us off!

Kind or greedy? Kind or greedy?

Which are you? Which are you?’

The eldest Princess was greedy, so she said:

‘Little for one, less for two,

Never a grain have I for you!’

The Wee Folk ran off crying: ‘Greedy! Greedy! Greedy!’ When the Giant came home that night and found that the Princess had not finished her work, he roared until the roof cracked,
seized her by the hair and flung her into the hen-house.

Next night the Giant went to the widow Queen’s garden to get a basketful of kale. This time the second Princess was waiting and watching for him, but like her elder sister, she was
unlucky. By the following night, she too was locked up in the hen-house, for everything that had happened to her elder sister happened to her.

The widow Queen was worried when her two daughters did not return.

‘It’s my turn to watch for the thief tonight,’ said the youngest Princess, ‘and find out what has happened to my sisters.’

‘Stay with me,’ said her mother. ‘I don’t want to lose three bonny daughters for the sake of some kale.’

But the youngest Princess refused to listen, and that night, she too was tossed into the Giant’s basket and taken to his house. She too was told to milk the cow and drive her on to the
hill to graze, and then to wash, comb, spin and weave a heap of wool.

Well, she milked the cow and drove her up the hill to graze, but when she saw the great heap of wool to be worked, she was at her wits’ end, and didn’t know where to begin.

So she made herself a bowl of porridge. She was sitting, supping it, when in ran a crowd of Wee Folk with yellow hair and wee pointed faces. The Princess was delighted to have someone to talk
to.

‘Good day to you, Wee Folk,’ she said. And they sang:

‘If you’re kind, you’ll give its a sup,

A greedy one will send us off!

Kind or greedy? Kind or greedy?

Which are you? Which are you?’

The youngest Princess was kind, so she said:

‘Go and get your spoons. There’s plenty for us all!’

‘Kind, kind, this one is kind!’ cried the Wee Folk, taking out their horn spoons.

When the porridge was finished, they thanked the Princess and ran off, all except one wee lad, who stood and bowed.

‘Have you any work for me?’ he said.

‘That I have and more,’ said the Princess. She showed him the wool and told him it had to be washed, combed, spun and woven into cloth before the Giant returned that night.
‘Even if you can do all that, I’ve nothing to give you in return.’

‘Don’t be worrying yourself about that,’ said he. ‘All I ask is that, when I bring back the wool, woven into cloth, you’ll guess my name.’

The Princess agreed, so he took the wool and away he went.

Now, the Princess was not one to meet trouble half-way, so without another thought about the wee lad’s name, she set to and prepared the Giant’s supper for him.
She was busy doing this, when there was a knock on the door. She opened it and there was an old wife begging for a night’s shelter.

‘Come in, old wife,’ said the Princess. ‘This is the Giant’s house and no place to take shelter, but if you can answer my riddle, there’ll be shelter and food for
you, right enough.’

‘Tell away, bonny lass, tell away,’ said the old wife.

‘Riddle me ree, riddle me ree!

Riddle me, riddle me, one two three!

Riddle me here, riddle me there,

The name of the lad with the yellow hair!’

BOOK: Folk Tales of Scotland
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