FORCE: A Bad Boy Sports Romance (16 page)

“Cheating on him,” I hissed through my teeth. I still wasn’t buying her contrite demeanor.

“Yes. I cheated on him. I was cheating on him the entire time we were together.” Lisette lifted her head and looked me in the eye for the first time, and for a moment I saw just how beautiful she actually was. And how terribly, terribly sad. “Junk made me feel like there were no consequences to my actions.” She cleared her throat and straightened up. “Now that I’m clean, I see that everything has a cause and effect. I caused our breakup, and the effect was that I lost him. My addiction caused me to cheat, and the effect was I lost one of the best men I’d ever had the good luck of meeting.” She looked at me, her eyes filled with sadness, and something loosened in my chest.

“I believe you,” I said.

She swallowed and nodded, her eyes filling with grateful tears. “I’m not going to mess with you guys anymore, I promise that. Just, please, take care of him, okay?”

“Of course I will,” I said.

She nodded. “I know he’ll take care of you.” She peered in to the apartment. I know she was noticing the bare floor when her face fell even further. She stepped back. “It’s funny how I didn’t really start loving him until I lost him,” she said, her voice full of the deepest, saddest regret. “He was my ‘one,’ and I never even knew it until he was gone.”

I swallowed, my throat too tight to do anything but nod. She glanced at me one more time, then placed the envelope deliberately into my hand.

Then she ducked her head, took a deep breath, and yanked the engagement ring off of her finger. She jammed it into my hand, avoiding eye contact, and turned to the waiting elevator. The doors closed, and she slid out of sight.

I didn’t move until I heard the gears stop and I knew she was really gone. Only then did I look down at the envelope. It was addressed to Ian in an assertive hand, the pen marks deeply grooving the paper. It looked like it took every ounce of will she had to write his name.

I staggered back in to the apartment like a zombie, only to be greeted by a naked Ian toweling off in the bedroom doorway, water pooling by his feet. He shot me such an open, happy smile that I almost didn’t want to tell him what had just happened.

“Is the pizza here?” he asked, rubbing the towel behind his ear.

I shook my head silently. The envelope was in one hand, the ring in my other. They both suddenly weighed as much as an elephant.

“Candace?” Ian said cautiously. “Why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost? Is my apartment haunted?”

I bit my lip. “Kind of, yeah,” I said, stretching out my arm and holding out the ring for him to see.

The towel slid from his hands, leaving him opening and closing his fists around nothing.

“Where did that come from?” he asked, his knuckles white.

“From her,” I said, exhaling heavily. I closed my eyes. “Ian, don’t get mad. She came by to give it back to you, and to give you this,” I held out the envelope.

“I don’t want anything of hers,” he said, his voice dark and terrible.

“No, it’s okay,” I said, swallowing my nausea and trying to sound more confident than I felt. “She wanted to tell you—to tell me, actually—that she wasn’t going to bother us anymore.” I opened my eyes and looked at him imploringly. “Did you know she had a drug problem while you two were together?”

His head twitched slightly, then he shook it emphatically. “Bullshit.”

“It’s not bullshit, and if you read the letter—”

“I don’t want to read the letter.”

I stretched out my hand. “Ian, come on, please. If not for her, then do it for me. For us. I can’t keep having her ghost looming over our relationship. Especially not when she came by
expressly
to apologize, and promise that she wouldn’t bother us again. Read the letter. Put it behind you.” I had been walking towards him, with each word, closer and closer. The fabric of his too large T-shirt clung around my legs. I could feel the heat rising from his skin, smelling the soap. “Please, Ian,” I implored him. “Being cheated on, that’s awful, and I know how much it hurt you. But you have to have closure, in order to move forward with me.” I lifted the envelope, “It’s right here. Not too many people get that. Be happy! Be happy that you’re able to move on.”

His expression was unreadable, and his lips worked like he wanted to say something, but no sound would come out.

“Fine then,” I said shortly, thrusting the envelope into his hand. “I’m just going to give you a moment alone with that…”

“Candace?” he said hesitantly.

I held up my hand. “No, you need to deal with this. I’ll be out in the living room.”

I stepped away from him, my anger rising. He was such a stubborn fool sometimes. The same things I loved about him were the things I hated the most.
How could that be?

My thoughts were interrupted by the shrill ringing of my cell phone. I knelt and dug around in my purse, and caught it just before it went to voicemail. “Donna?” I asked. It was well past two in the morning.

“Candace?” she choked out, then dissolved into sobs.

“Oh my God, Donna, are you okay?” I asked, springing to my feet. “Were you in an accident? Do you need me to come?” I was already yanking on my jeans, and rifling through my purse for my keys.

“No. I’m fine,” Donna said. “I mean—no, I’m completely not fine, but I’m not in an accident.”

“Then what’s wrong?” I demanded.

“Candace, the party, Tim said—”

“Donna, please, slow down, I can’t understand you, honey.”

Donna took a deep breath. “Tim cheated on me!” she wailed.

I sat down heavily on the couch. “
What
? How? When?”

“He just told me, just blurted it out now,” she said, in between hiccupping breaths.

“Has it been going on for a while?” I cringed.

“No, at least he says it hasn’t. He says it was just a one-time mistake, a stupid cold feet thing, but it was at the party, Candace! When we couldn’t find him!” She was veering away from sadness and into rage. “When he disappeared like that. And we all were looking for him. You know, when Ian finally found him? That’s what he was doing—he was in the bathroom with some fucking slut, getting a blow job, and he says that Ian found him with his pants down, and he knew that Ian would probably call me, so he wanted to be the first and have me hear it from him.”

The phone slipped from my fingers and bounced once on the couch. I scrambled to pick it back up again.

“What did Ian do?” I demanded.

Ian stepped around from his bedroom, wearing a perplexed expression.

“Tim said that Ian caught him,” Donna said. Then she paused. “Wait, he never told you?”

I glared at Ian. “No,” I said tightly. “He didn’t say a word.”

“Why the hell did he do that?” Donna asked, confused.

“I don’t know,” I said shortly. “But I promise you, I’ll find out.” I tore my gaze away from Ian’s worried stare, and fixed my gaze on my fingers, which were digging white spots into my thigh. “Donna, honey, do you need me to come over?”

“No, no,” she sniffled. “I’m fine. Tim already left. He’s going to spend the night at his brother’s. I just, I think I just really need sleep.”

“You sleep, honey. Take a pill if you need to. I’ll call you in the morning. I love you, Donna,” I told her.

She sniffed. “Love you, too,” she hiccupped. Then hung up the phone.

“What was that about?” Ian asked.

I set my phone down, and folded my hands neatly in my lap to keep from strangling him. “I don’t know. It was a complete surprise to me.” I said. “But
apparently
you already knew all about it.”

First he was confused, but then his eyebrows lifted. “Was that Donna?” he said.

“Yes! It
was
Donna!” I exploded. “She just told me that Tim cheated on her. And,” I added, “she told me that
you
were the one who found him!”

Ian’s Adam’s apple bobbed up and down once as he swallowed. “I did,” he said shortly.

“Why wouldn’t you tell me?” I demanded.

He folded his arms across his broad chest. “I was going to handle it myself, Candace,” he said icily. “Man to man.”

“Oh, man to man, huh?” I snapped. “Well
that
worked really fucking well.” I buried my head in my hands. “My poor sister.”

“I didn’t think he would say something to her so quickly,” Ian ventured.

“What? You didn’t think he’d have the decency to tell her?” I rolled my eyes. “Well, I guess why would you? When you wouldn’t even have the
decency
to say anything yourself.”

Ian held up his hands. “Whoa, slow the hell down there, Candace. Look, I know how it feels to get cheated on. I was trying to help. I wanted to do the right thing, and now you’re pissed at me.”

“Yes, I’m pissed at you! Why wouldn’t you say anything?”

“Because I had a plan! A plan to make it all better. I knew what needed to be done,” he said emphatically.

I stood up from the couch. “Well, apparently not everything goes according to plan.” I said, slinging my purse over my shoulder. “Like my plans of sleeping here tonight.”

“Candace, come on.”

“No
you
come on. Your little power trip backfired, and ended up hurting my sister way more than she needed to be hurt.” I opened the door. “Call me when you’re ready to stop being such an almighty asshole.” Then I shut the door on him and burst into tears.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Ian

The goal was mine. I had the puck, and was sliding effortlessly towards it, feeling everything moving the way it should, my body in tune, my mind sharp…

Something huge and heavy slammed into me, knocking me backwards so that I landed hard on my right hip.

I was only down for a nanosecond, before I sprang back up and started swinging. “You stupid asshole, you slammed into me on purpose!” I shouted, aiming a punch at Jake’s jaw.

“You skated right the fuck over me,” he protested, his face nearly purple. “Why don’t you watch where the hell you are going, Carter? Or are your eyes going in your old age?”

“I’ll show you what an old man can do,” I growled. I had him by the collar, dragging him to the side, ready to beat the ever-loving shit out of him.
How dare he get in my way?
We were supposed to be on the same damn team. It was a deliberate—I knew it was deliberate.

A piercing whistle sounded in my ears. “Time! Hit the showers!” Coach Randall bellowed.

Brad skated up to my side and deftly inserted himself between Jake and me. “You heard the man!” he called out jovially. Then he looked at me and shook his head minutely.

I swallowed hard and nodded back. Instead of killing Jake, I turned my back on him and followed my friend to the locker room.

But like the yapping little shit-dog he was, Jake wasn’t about to let it go. He ran to catch up, still spoiling for the fight I denied him. “Want me to take your arm, old man? Where’s your seeing eye dog?”

“Do you hear something?” Brad asked the air.

I shook my head and opened my locker, then started shrugging off my gear.

“You’re slipping. You’re all talk now, just an old player past his prime, but people still jerk you off for some reason.” Jake slammed his locker shut.

“Well,” Brad piped up. “Since we’re all sharing opinions here,
you’re
a fucking child having a temper tantrum.” He snorted. “Grow up. You’re part of a team here. Ian’s the enforcer, you’re defense—those are the rules. You don’t get to throw a hissy fit and take your ball and go home.”

“Or puck,” Oswald interjected from the next row, laughing.

But Jake still only glared at me. “You think you’re such hot shit.”

I leaned against my locker and regarded him coolly. “I
know
I’m such hot shit.”

“Fucking asshole!” He finally gave up and stormed to the showers.

There was a long moment of silence that followed. Brad looked at Oswald, who was peeking around the corner, and then they both looked at me. Brad finally took a deep breath. “It’s just stress,” he shrugged. “Totally normal.”

“Totally,” Oswald nodded enthusiastically.

“Oh yeah?” I scoffed. “Just stress, that’s all?”

“Give him a break, Ian.”

“I’m going to murder him before the playoffs, you know this.”

“You need to relax, dude. Live life, have fun.”

I crossed my arms and regarded him skeptically. “Whatever, Zen Master Scott. You’re just saying that because
you’re
relaxed, ‘
living life’
and ‘
having fun’
while banging your new girl twenty-four seven.”

Brad’s eyes shone. “She’s—” he paused, then lowered his voice. “She’s amazing. Did you know she can do this thing with her tongue, where—”

“That’s it!” I laughed, throwing up my hands to ward off further descriptive details. “You don’t need to go any farther than that.” Then I shook my hands and rolled my shoulders back. “Guy’s got me all worked up when he literally is the last thing I need to be worried about right now.”

“Candace?” Brad guessed accurately.

“She’s pissed at me. She might be right to be pissed at me. I dunno.” I sat down and pulled my phone from my bag. “She hasn’t called or texted me today like she usually does.”

“Are you going to call her?” Oswald wondered. “You need to fix whatever you know is wrong.” He looked almost panicked. I wondered if he was flashing back to his divorce.

“I will,” I nodded.

Brad came over and loomed above me. “Do it now,” he ordered.

“Can’t I shower first?” I protested, laughing. “I smell like yesterday’s garbage.”

He wrinkled his nose. “Yeah, you kind of do. So, just send her a text.”

“Since when do
you
give
me
advice on girls?”

He grinned. “Since you started fucking things up with them.”

“Whatever.” I picked up my phone. “I’m sending her one now, Doctor Phil.”

Me: I just got out of practice. I hope you’re having a good morning. I’d like to talk to you soon. When can I see you?

I stared at the screen.
Was that good enough? Should I apologize?
I really didn’t know what I was apologizing for, to be honest. Tim fucked up and I was going to confront him about it, give him some perspective. Help him with his cold feet or whatever commitment issue he was wrestling with. That was the nice thing to do, I thought. Not ratting him out to his fiancée, or worse, his fiancée’s sister. I felt like I had done the right thing here, and I was getting raked over the fucking coals for it.

That’s what I get for trying to be nice.

“Okay!” Brad broke into my thoughts. “You sent it. Now, go shower. You fucking reek.” He waved the air in front of his nose.

“Come here and gimme a hug!” I called, reaching out to put him in a headlock. He play-shoved me back and my phone slid from the bench and landed on my shoes. We both stared.

“Shit, close call,” Brad said. “You almost cracked the screen.”

“
I
did?” I demanded, setting it back on the bench. “You need to watch your pronouns. It was your clumsy ass that knocked it.” This time I did get him in a headlock, and endured his kidney punches all the way to the showers.

Jake emerged with a towel around his waist and glared at us like he was thinking of committing murder right in the shower bank. “Assholes,” he repeated, and headed back into the locker area.

Brad emerged from under my arm, rubbing his neck. “Let’s never invite him out for a drink again,” he declared.

“Agreed,” I said, and then I turned the hot water on full blast.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Candace

I poured more coffee into Donna’s favorite chipped mug, and then dumped a truly obscene amount of sugar into it.

“Thanks,” my sister sniffled as I handed it to her. Her eyes were still red-rimmed, but were not nearly as puffy as they were when I first arrived this morning. “And thank you for not judging my sugar intake.”

“If it’s what you need to feel better, I’d gladly just empty the sugar jar right down your throat,” I said, sitting down on the couch next to her and sliding my feet behind her back.

“Ahh, mental clarity,” she sipped her coffee and inhaled sharply. “Finally.”

“Caffeine finally kicking in?”

“It was a late night.”

I nodded. “I know.”
For me, too
, I didn’t say. This wasn’t about me, even though my mind kept going back to Ian’s stubborn refusal to understand.
How could he possibly think that not telling me was the right thing to do?

“You know what’s sad?” Donna said, breaking into my thoughts. “Is that I’m totally ready to take him back.”

“Why is that sad?” I wondered.

She peered at me over the top of her mug. “Because, how could I? Don’t I have any self-respect? How could I let him get away with doing something like this to me?” She set her mug down, and I pressed my lips together to keep from answering too quickly. I could tell she needed to talk.

She cleared her throat. “But—I believe him. He says it was a stupid mistake that he will never repeat, and I believe him. And I trust that, even though he betrayed my trust.” She looked at me, panicked. “Oh God, what’s wrong with me?”

I shook my head. “I don’t think you need to punish him. From what you’ve told me, he’s probably punishing himself pretty hard right now.”

“Oh, he is,” Donna nodded. “He cried, Candace. I have only seen him cry twice. Once at his Grandpa’s funeral, and the second time while watching
Braveheart
. He’s not someone who can fake tears.”

“So,” I was genuinely curious, “what are you going to do?”

Donna took another sip of coffee and closed her eyes. “I’m going to take today off from work,” she said dreamily, “and I am going to watch as many Channing Tatum movies as I can find on Netflix.” She opened her eyes. “Tim hates that I have a crush on Channing Tatum,” she explained. I nodded with a smile. She closed her eyes again. “Then I am going to go to the Indian buffet and stuff myself full of curry without worrying about how my breath smells. And then I’m going to paint my toes while listening to Taylor Swift, who I have had to pretend for four years that I despise but is actually like my favorite ever.”

I grinned. “And then what?”

She opened her eyes and sighed. “And then I’m going to call my fiancé and figure out how we can get past this.”

I blinked. “Since when did you become the older, wiser sister?”

She smiled. “I don’t know if I became older, but I’ve definitely always been wiser.”

I threw a pillow at her. “Watch the coffee!” she shouted.

Just then my phone buzzed in my purse. “Is that Ian?” Donna immediately asked.

I pressed my lips together. “Yeah, probably.”

“You going to see what he has to say?”

I grimaced. “Before you shamed me with your maturity? No, probably not. But since you showed me up, I feel like I have to.”

She raised her coffee mug like a champagne toast. “You’re welcome.”

I rolled my eyes and retrieved my phone.

Ian: I just got out of practice. I hope you’re having a good morning. I’d like to talk to you soon. When can I see you?

I pursed my lips.

“What’s he say?” Donna wanted to know.

“Not all that much,” I sighed. “Why are men so much work?”

“You’re asking the wrong girl,” Donna huffed into her coffee mug.

I thought a second.

Me: Are you apologizing?

There. Now there was no way he could mistake my meaning. I was pissed, and I wanted an apology.

My phone buzzed in my hands. “What’d he say?” Donna had slid over to the end of the couch and was blatantly reading over my shoulder.

Ian: Yes. I’m sorry. Come see me.

“Maybe he’s like, in a rush? Can’t really take the time to type out a full response?” Donna ventured.

I rolled my eyes. “Then don’t say anything until you can actually talk,” I huffed.

Me: You’re a pain in my ass, you know that?

My phone chimed immediately.

Ian: I know. You should come see me.

Donna burst out laughing. “I would have never called Tim eloquent before, but holy crap, Candace, Ian’s making him look like a Goddamn poet.”

I furrowed my brow and stared at my phone. “He’s not usually such a Neanderthal,” I said. “In fact, he’s pretty well-spoken when he puts his mind to it.”

“Doesn’t sound like himself?” Donna asked.

I scrolled up and picked a particularly colorfully worded text from a few nights ago. Donna reddened. “Okay, yes. The man has a way with words. So maybe he really can’t talk.”

“Maybe,” I said. I sighed. “I guess it’s worth something that he’s trying?”

Me: A persistent pain in my ass.

His response fired back immediately, almost like his thumb was hovering over the send button.

Ian: I just want to see you.

I looked over my shoulder at Donna. She shrugged her shoulders. I sighed.

Me: Where are you?

Ian: Locker room

My heart did an involuntary flip, and then started to race.
The locker room.
Immediately, the blood warmed in my veins at the memory. I shifted, feeling that familiar ache.

My body was a traitor.

And so, apparently, were my fingers.

I scooted away, hunching my shoulders so Donna couldn’t read over my shoulder anymore.

Me: You mean like the first time?

There was a pause.

Ian: Yes.

I shifted again, and then slipped my phone into my pocket. If he wanted to make it up to me, the locker room at
Johnny’s Icehouse West
was probably the most appropriate place to do it. My heart thudded as I remembered his fingers delving into my skin, the warmth of his tongue heating me to an inferno while my back pressed against the cold metal of the lockers. It had been the start of everything between us.
What better place was there to start over?

“Um,” I said, as I stood up and looked at my sister.