Forever Distraction (Distraction #3) (34 page)

My finger trails the wetness up to the source, and I wonder if I even need my knowledge of sex right now. I wonder, because my girl is spread for me, trusting me, watching my fascination, and is one hundred percent turned on without using any of the other stuff. I slide a finger through her folds and spread her warmth over my cock. Then, I lean over her, feeling her soft skin on my chest. I lift my penis and guide it into her, continuing to kiss her shoulder and neck as I ease in and out.

I want to savor every muscle contraction, every tender pressure around my sensitive cock, and every pleasured hiss that escapes her. She’s my new first, and this, from now on, will be what I remember as my first time. I lose myself in the dance, never breaking my stride, knowing it feels too good to last forever, but wanting this first to be the longest.

“Harder,” she whispers and a smile creeps over my face. I can’t help it; Katarina never says anything during sex—moans, yes, but requests during actual sex, no. “Harder,” she repeats louder and I lift from her sweaty body and stand ready to aggressively mount her.

“You like it rough?” I continue my leisurely pattern, liking the control I carry at this moment. She needs me to deliver the raw, unrestrained lust I hold for her. She needs me. 

“Yes…I need to feel you,” she replies, and my heart squeezes a little for the pain she’s had to overcome, the pain she needs still to feel human. I grip her hips tightly and her muscles tighten around me, and then I pound her, slam into her with fierce pleasure, and it feels right; it
feels so right. I plunge into her and she cries out for more, begging for it. Fucking…it’s the most perfect sound and I comply, giving her everything I have. Grunts and pleas fill our bubble, the sexy smell and the sweat wrap around us, joining us, making us one, whole. We are united inside our bubble.

When I come, it’s violent and my body feels the cramping sensation from all of my muscles. It starts in my lower stomach and thighs, and then my toes, and even my neck cramps up. I pull her with me when I lunge for the bed, tugging her snug against my body in the process. As if I’m drowning and she’s my life preserver. My legs and arms wrap around her, and I squeeze her so tight I think she might actually break in two because of the force. I feel my seed fall from her down my thighs, and my
fading erection makes a rapid comeback.

“So…is it too early to talk about your next fantasy?” I ask and she giggles.

“I want to dance…dress up and dance.” She’s thought about this and it makes me elated, fucking happy as hell I can give her this without screwing it up with my own need to dominate. “I want to have a teenage boy watch me dance and wait for me after the show to tell me how much he enjoyed it.”

I grow quiet, because for me, it isn’t a fantasy; it was a reality…a reality I don’t want to relive. Yes, I love to watch her dance, but I’m reluctant, because I remember all too clearly the after-part, when she disappeared. I lay there, still clinging to my beauty, but silently wishing she will pick a different fantasy. Maybe, it could be one where she dances for me, but just not that one. She must sense my growing anxiety, because she adds, “But I want you to be blond…could you do that?” She pauses and I hear a smile in her voice.

“Blond?”

“Yeah, like Brad Pitt in his younger years,” she says in her serious voice, and I instantly loosen my vise-like hold around her and laugh, because…well…I laugh, because she makes me fucking happy.   

Katarina

I lay
my three-month-old, Jason—we call him Jay—down after his 5 am feeding. It is so amazing being a mommy to these tiny little people. So perfect, I am addicted to these little beings. I watch him as his eyelids close and his pacifier moves up and down. I only put a light blanket over him, since he runs hot like his daddy. “Have a good nap, sweet baby Jay.” I tiptoe out of the room and close the door. I’m not worried about waking him; it’s the others I worry about.

I ma
ke my way back to my room and crawl under the cozy covers. I fall right to sleep, waking hours later to kisses on my neck. I’m suddenly cold, so I open my eyes to find my favorite man staring at me, a smile replacing the frown I just had. His gentle finger traces the curve of my bottom. “Good morning,” he whispers, kissing me on my lips.

“You came home early
.” I close my eyes, enjoying his hands on me, missing his touch.

“I couldn’t sleep without you
. It was a long three days.” He talks as he moves over me, caging me in his arms. I smile, knowing what he’s doing. It’s my favorite way to be woken up. His nose dips into the crook of my neck and I feel him licking the sensitive skin there. He’s very tender and loving as he slips himself inside me. He moves in and out of me slowly, and then groans as if it’s torture. I can tell he’s savoring me, enjoying every muscle contraction, and every shiver that takes over my body.

He shower
s me with kisses, and it doesn’t take me long to give in to his sweetness. I crave the rougher side, but I’m addicted to his touch. It’s the one thing I can’t live without. I take what I can get. Our quiet, heavy breathing and the movements of the bed are the only noises, making them seem extremely loud, but I enjoy his sounds almost as much as his touch. His movements and breathing pick up; I feel that wonderful shower of pleasure run through my body. He finishes after me and whispers a thank you in my ear. It makes me smile. “Go back to sleep. I’m going to wake up the kids and make breakfast,” he says as he pulls the covers back over me, and I rest my eyes, enjoying my sleep-in time.

I
slip out of bed an hour later and stroll through the house, looking at all the pictures on the walls—our wedding photo, a picture of me dancing, and our family pictures. It’s quiet on my walk to the kitchen. The fridge is covered with colored drawings and snapshots of Owen and his girls with each of our kids, all smiling. I stand back and watch the magic happening in the kitchen.

The kids around Jason each tak
e turns filling him in on what he missed while he was gone. James, our oldest, sits on the counter, stirring the pancake mix. Kristy, our four-and-a-half-year-old, laughs when Jason tugs her hair. She stands close to him on a stepstool. Kailee is in her high chair singing loudly, but not making any sense. She shoves Cheerios in her mouth. The new baby is on the counter strapped in a baby chair, eating his fist and humming. “Are you going to stand in the doorway and stare at me, or do you want to have a seat and do it?”

I walk
in, surprised he still has the ability to sense me with all the other distractions. I sit at the counter and the kids continue their chattering; Jason peeks up at me and winks. A plate of yogurt and fruit is placed before me with some eggs. I eat and watch, enjoying my morning. Jay is hungry when I finish, and I move to the outside patio to feed him.

I hear Jason before I s
ee him, “I missed that.” I grin at him, but arch my brow in question. “That euphoric look you both have when he latches on.” The man has no boundaries; he’s talking about me breastfeeding. I crinkle my nose at his observation. His serious face is overly focused; he’s concentrating. “Is it weird I find it sexy?”

“You
’re a horn-dog.” I catch his eyes and his smile spreads across his face. I make it a point to roll my eyes, because for some bizarre reason, he loves it and finds it sexy.

With a smile that reminds me of why I fell in love with him, he makes
his way outside to sit with me. My eyes shift to watch Bo and his playmate run around. We found and rescued a female brown lab, and Jason and Bo work with her. She is a dwarf compared to Bo, and it’s fun to watch them play.

I hear Jason’s voice
as I feel his leg rub against mine. “You worked yesterday. How did it go?” I love how he is unaffected by my breastfeeding; he’s so casual. He moves his fingers over Jay’s hair and moving cheek.

“Yes
, I did. Your mom and dad watched the kids all day; Becky helped.” Becky is our nanny and goes everywhere with us. The kids love her, and I get to spend time with my very handsome husband. “I enjoyed my day off from being a mom.” I look up at him and watch his jaw clench. I hate when he clenches his perfect teeth. “I flew to Los Angeles in the morning with Marcus and accomplished a lot. It’s my day to feel human; the one day I work separates me from being attached to someone, and I get to talk to grownups. When I am here, my days run together. When I work, I feel appreciated. I know it sounds crazy, but the break makes me thankful for all of this.” I wave my hand over at the little children making their way out onto the back deck.

I c
an never give up the charity; it’s what holds me to my grandfather. His legacy is up to me to keep alive, and I will always work…it’s nonnegotiable. I can sense his struggle at the idea of me working, so I change the subject. “So, how’s Jake? Do you think he will be a great help this year?” Jake, Jason’s nephew, is still struggling with his anger, so during the summers, we send him with Father Nickels to help at the different charities building schools and houses to keep him busy and out of trouble.

“Jake is going to do great. He is with Owen and
his family right now. Owen wanted me to tell you he is staying in the same room as Jake. I think he’s worried about his daughters more than my nephew. He has my charm and has been flirting with Owen’s girls.” I laugh and he continues, “Your brother stopped in and we went to dinner. He will be at the beach house this summer to visit.”

I
gaze at the little life in my arms, counting all of my blessings. I button my shirt up and put the baby over my shoulder to pat his back as my eyes fall on Jason. There isn’t a day that goes by I don’t thank God for this man and all of the joy he brings me. “How about we all take a walk around the yard and visit the horses?” I suggest while I stand up.

H
e grins, kisses me, and then grabs my hand as we leave the back deck. We all follow Jason around the property like we’re his ducklings, the kids taking turns getting his attention. Kristy’s the horse lover, and her blue eyes light up when she and Jason take off in a run toward the stables. James runs along too, but more because he’s competitive and won’t let anyone beat him.
I have no idea where he gets that trait.

I walk slowly
next to three-year-old Kailee, who twirls and leaps with her chubby legs over all the sprinkler puddles. Bo’s close at her side. I hold baby Jay wrapped in a blanket and have a sudden flutter in my stomach, and a large smile spreads across my face. This is the best chapter of my life.

I first want to thank my husband, the inspiration in my life for motivating me to write instead of read. He is the real reason I read and write about love. I’m so grateful to have him as my best friend and supporter. He still gives me butterflies and continues to make me laugh with his quick-witted sense of humor. He often quotes the heated passionate parts I have written or read about, which is hilarious. He truly is a
funny man
.

My mom is also my best friend and I could
n’t have written even one book without her consistent encouragement. She doesn’t read this type of book, but that didn’t stop her. Not only did she read it, she told her girlfriends about it. I think she is my most enthusiastic book-pusher. And I adore her for that. She means the world to me and the fact that she’s proud of my naughty books easily makes her, the best mother to ever exist. I aspire to be like her.

I can never thank the people who choose to give up their time and read my book
s enough. As a reader myself I know, there are so many great books, and so little time. Thank you
so
much.

My last, but certainly not least thank you goes out to Kayla
Robichaux, my editor. She took my words, sprinkled something on them and made the story better. I appreciate the hard word she put into my last two books and all the smiles she passed to me throughout the editing process.

Thank you
.

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