Forever Girl (34 page)

Chapter 38

Lyric

    The twins have left and I’m restless so I go looking for my man. I find him in the basement working out. Seeing him with his shirt off and his arms and chest glistening with sweat I feel myself getting turned on. I’m getting wet and that alone makes me happy because I’m having this reaction to him. It’s only happened a couple of times and it’s not like it used to be when I was wet and horny around him most of the time. I think my brain’s finally catching up with my body. I walk down the stairs and walk up to him and he sees the look on my face.

“Whatcha doin down here baby?”

“I got bored and I wanted to see what you’re doing.” I say to him.

“I’m almost finished with my workout.” He tells me.

“I’ll sit on the bench and watch you finish.”

“Okay sweetheart.” He says with a smile.

I watch him finish on the other weight bench and then he grabs his towel and wipes his face and body off and he catches me watching him.

“Do ya like whatcha see baby doll?” He asks with a laugh.

“I like it a whole lot.” I respond to him.

“I’m glad you like what you see babe.” He says with a smirk.

“I’ll walk you up the stairs baby. Then I’m going to grab a shower.” He says to me.

“I can take a shower with you.”

“As tempting as that is babe. I need to shower and do some work in my office.” He says to me.

My feelings are hurt right now because he wouldn’t have turned me down before. Hell from the minute the twins left he would’ve taken my clothes off and been balls deep in me. I turn around so he can’t see my face.

“Don’t worry about me going up the stairs. I can make it on my own. You can just shower down here.”

I hurry up the stairs before he can say anything to me. I shut the door at the top of the steps. I make my way to our room and I lock myself in my bathroom. I start my shower and get undressed without looking at myself and get into the shower. I turn the radio pretty loud to drown out the sound and put my head under the shower head and I cry. I cry because on some level I knew this would happen. I cry because I’ll never be the same as I was before the rape. I cry because he just broke my fucking heart. I sit down on the bench and fold in on myself trying to keep my broken inside me. My brain’s telling me I should’ve known. The only fucking reason he proposed is because he wants to have his kids with him. My brain’s telling me that he loves me but he’s no longer in love with me. I knew that things would fucking change when he found out he’s wasn’t the only one that’s been in me. That fucking changed everything and I feel like my insides are dying and I don’t know how to deal with this. I can’t live here with him if he doesn’t fucking want me. I can’t be with him just for our children’s sake and not have him want me sexually anymore. My heart fucking hurts so fucking bad. I wish that I’d never made it out of that fucking cabin if this is how my fucking life is going to be like now. I’m so fucking stupid to think things could go back to the way they were.

    I’m crying so hard I don’t hear Dean get into the bathroom or open the shower door.

“Baby?” He says as I continue to cry.

I love him so fucking much. I don’t know how to give him up.

“Fuck baby I’m so fucking sorry. I wasn’t even thinking about what my rejection would do to you. I want you honey I want you more than you even realize. Oh god baby listen to me! I was going to talk to you when I got out of the shower. Baby I’m sorry I didn’t realize the damage I could do. I need you to listen! I want you, I love you, I want us to be together every second, every minute. I was down stairs working out so that I would use up my pent up sexual energy I have for you. I want us to wait until we’re married baby. We’ve waited this long we can wait a little bit longer. Baby do you hear me? Do you understand what I’m saying? Baby talk to me!” He says with sadness and regret.

I continue to cry and he has me wrapped up in him tight. He’s whispering that he loves me and he’s so sorry for making me feel like he doesn’t want to make love to me because that’s all he wants to do. I wrap my arms around him and I hug him and bury my face in his neck. I’m trying to get my breathing and tears under control.

“You’re my life and I can’t wait for you to be my wife so I can make love to you.” He tells me as he holds me tight to him.

“We need to hurry up and get married because I need you.” I tell him through my sobs.

“I’ll start working on it in the morning baby.” He tells me.

“I can’t live without you and I don’t know how to give you up. My brain’s telling me that I’m stupid to think we could go back to what it was like before. Part of me feels like it’s dying from the pain of you not wanting me.”

He picks me up and takes me to the bed and he lays half on me.

“Look at me. I’m sorry for rejecting you the way I did sweetheart. I want you so bad that I can hardly stand it. My cock’s been stuck on stone for the past six weeks, baby. I want to wait to make love to you until we are married. We’ll have our time tonight and we’ll do everything but make love okay, baby.” He says to me.

I shake my head telling him I understand what he’s saying to me. He kisses me and I feel myself relax into the kiss. He hands all over me just rubbing and caressing.

“I’m going to get up and take my shorts off. I want you to stand up next to the bed and wait for me to tell you what to do next.” He says to me.

I get up and do as he says. I’m still shaken up but I’m starting to feel better. I think it’s because he’s using his Dom voice. He takes his pants off and lays down flat on the bed.

“I want you to get on top of me. I want your ass in my face. We’ll be pleasuring each other with our mouths and hands.” He says

He rubs my ass and feel his mouth on me. I exhale and realize that I needed him in this intimate way not just fucking but showing that he still wants me in a sexual way. He’s sucking and licking and it feels so damn good that I moan. I look down at his cock and it’s hard and looks like it might be hurting him. I give the head a kiss and lick it like it’s a sucker. I lick around the head and open my mouth. I take him in as far as I can and then I suck in my cheeks and lift my head off his cock. I repeat the action and then I start sucking with gusto. It takes me a few tries but I’m able to suck him into my throat. I keep him there for a few seconds and then lift my head a little and then take him back into my throat. I start palming and squeezing his balls and I hear him moan. I feel his cock get even harder and I see his balls tighten. I know he’s getting ready to cum. I put even more effort into sucking him into my throat and I feel him stick a finger in my ass. I moan and I know he can feel that straight in his cock because he’s now pumping himself into my throat and he starts to cums hard. I pull back on his cock and then suck him clean and release him from my mouth. He’s steadily sucking, licking, and biting me and it feels so fucking good.

“I want you to turn around and sit back on my face. I want you to fuck my face baby.” I do as he says as he starts kissing my pussy lips again.

He starts to fuck me with his tongue and he’s rubbing and pinching my clit. His other hand has grabbed some of my wetness in his fingers and he’s sticking them back into my ass. I’m moaning from the pleasure he’s giving me and I feel my orgasm starting to build up. I let him know I’m about to cum. He moves his mouth away from me.

“I want you to squirt all over my face baby.”

He then returns to fucking me with his tongue. He thrust his tongue into me again and pinches my clit while he rams two fingers in my ass. My orgasm detonates and I squirt all over him. He kisses the inside of my thigh as I move off of his face and lay down. He wraps me into him and asks me how I feel.

“I feel better and I realize I just needed the intimacy between the two of us.” I say to him with a satisfied smile and sigh.

“I’ve wanted you since I was nineteen years old baby and that won’t change ever. I love you sweetheart.” He says to me with conviction in his voice.

I tell him I love him too. I know it’s silly but I once again feel secure in our relationship.

Chapter 39

Lyric

  “I’ve gotta meeting this morning baby. I’ll see you at the party this afternoon. I want you to fun with the girls and you need to tell your brain to shut the fuck up when it tells you to doubt that what we have. I love you baby doll.” Dean says to me when he wakes me up kissing me.

“I love you and I’ll see you later honey.” I respond with a smile.

“You three will have a couple of prospects with you today. If you feel like you need to rest to call me and I’ll come and get you or tell you tell one of the prospect and he’ll bring you home.” He says to me.

“I’ll take it easy I promise and if I feel like I’m doing too much I will call you.”

“The girls are downstairs baby you need to get up and get dressed.” He kisses me one last time and walks out our door.

I get up and throw on some shorts and baby doll shirt Jess got me earlier this week. I put on my flip flops because we’re getting pedicures and I don’t want to mess up the nail polish. I make my way downstairs where the girls are waiting for me. I tell Jess I want to take the Terrain and she rolls her eyes and smiles.

“I might not be able to drive yet but I want to ride in my new car.” She and Nic both laugh as we make our way to my car.

    We arrive at Juanita’s Beauty Shop and get started on our spa day. The girls talk me into getting my hair cut and styled as well as my makeup done. I don’t think I need all this for a cook out at the clubhouse and I tell them so but they tell me to hush and just to enjoy being pampered. I tell Juanita that I don’t want much make-up because I don’t like the way it feels on my face. She tells me that she’ll have the girls go light on me and they won’t use foundation and concealer on me and I thank her. It takes a couple of hours and I’m ready to leave but the girls tell me that we need to stop at Jess’s because she bought dresses for us to wear to the party.

“What’s going on?” I ask both of them.

“I’m just excited that you’re out and about and I thought we should have a girl’s day. I bought the dresses so our men don’t look at the sweet butts that’ll be there.” Jess replies.

Nic looks a bit uncomfortable and I ask her if she’s okay? She responds she’s fine she thinks she might be coming down with a bug or something.

“Maybe you should go lay down for a bit. Come to the party later if you start feeling better.” I say to Nic.

She tells me she’ll be fine and she probably just needs to eat. I tell her that she’s probably right and we should stop and get a bite at Ackley’s. I go to the counter to pay my bill and Juanita tells me that we’ve already been paid for by my sexy ass man. I smile and thank her for the day and she tells me that it was her pleasure. I send a text to my man thanking him for today and he texts me back telling me that he loves me and I deserve it.