Authors: Calvin Wade
“
Hey! Where are you going?
”
and followed Billy McGregor into
the lounge. I am not one to worry about causing a scene. I followed the
scent of vomit, caught him up in seconds and gave him rather a large
shove in the back. This caught Billy unawares, which nearly resulted in
him being spreadeagled across the drink sodden carpet but after a few
corrective steps, he managed to maintain his equilibrium then turned
to face me. In the clearer light, I could see his eyes were redder than a
heavy flow tampon.
“
You
’
re a bitch, Jemma Watkinson!
”
“
You
’
re a wanker, Billy McGregor!
”
He smiled at me like Shane McGowan with teeth.
“
Not at the moment, I
’
m not. Go and ask Faye Williams upstairs!
”
No surprise to hear he
’
d been bonking.
“
Is she the reason you threw up?
”
“
No, I threw up after I finished screwing your sister and she
reminded me
that she i
s only thirteen.
”
Now Matthew Coughlan may have failed to protect my honour but
I was not going to make the same mistake when it came to Kelly. I knew
it was a lie. I wasn
’
t quite sure where Kelly was, but I knew for certain
she would not be having sex with Billy McGregor. It sort of half crossed
my mind that she must have been upstairs though, otherwise how would
Billy have known she was here? I suppose all it would have taken was
one person to mention her presence and for Billy to overhear, but maybe
it was the wine that stopped me rationalising the information properly.
I just took it in, digested it and then attacked, throwing an almighty
punch that Mike Tyson would have been proud of. Mike Tyson would
have been impressed with the power and the venom in that punch
anyway, perhaps less impressed with its accuracy. It was a semi-circular
swing that started behind my back, swooping around the front in a 180
degree motion
, totally missing Billy but catching the nearest bystander
square on the jaw. In a split second, my emotions went from shock to
horror to amusement, when I realised it was James Billinghams face
that had collided with my fist. Amusement only lasted for a few seconds
though before it was replaced by panic, as I watched James Billingham
’
s
shocked torso crumple to the floor like a Thunderbird who
’
s strings had
been cut. I was pretty sure I
’
d killed him.
Kelly and I looked at each other. This time though, it was not
flirtation, it was fear. Nick Birch was not one for elaborate hoaxes and
if he thought Jim may be dead, I had no doubt something serious was
going down. The irony of the fact that Kelly
’
s sister may have killed him
had not escaped me.
I stood up and ran into the lounge, Nick and Kelly not far
behind. Jim was poleaxed. He was laid out on the floor like a Russian
leader at a state funeral. A few kids were kneeling down next to him,
trying to wake him up and I even heard Sophie Leigh suggest we should
ring for an ambulance. Jemma Watkinson stood over him, rubbing her
right knuckles, she didn
’
t look triumphant though, she looked pale. I
bundled my way through the on-lookers and do-gooders.
“
Let me get to him! He
’
s my brother!
”
The crowds dispersed like the sea for Moses.
“
Jim! Jim! Wake up!
”
Nothing. He was out of it. Where the hell was Caroline?
I shouted in panic,
“
CAROLINE! CAROLINE!
”
I heard her shout back from the distance,
“
Hold on, I
’
m coming!
”
Caroline raced in looking flush. She surveyed the scene.
“
Shit! What
’
s happened?
”
Caroline kneeled down next to me.
“
Bloody Jemma Watkinson punched him!
”
“
It was an accident.
”
Jemma murmured from above.
Caroline slapped Jim
’
s face gently.
“
Come on now Jim, wake up!
”
“
Where have you been?
”
I questioned Caroline.
It wasn
’
t really a convenient time to begin the blame process, but I was doing it
anyway.
“
For a wee! Can you not wake him up?
”
Caroline asked.
“
What does it look like?
”
I replied befo
re slappi
ng Jim far harder than Caroline
had.
“
JIM! JIM!
Wake up you dickhead!
”
I turned to Caroline in panic.
“
Does he need the kiss of life?
”
I was desperate for help. Fear was overcoming me. How were we
going to explain to Mum and Dad that we took Jim to the party, left
him to fend for himself
and he di
ed. Luckily Caroline then had a
‘
Eureka!
’
moment.
“
Anyone got a mirror?
”
Admittedly my first thought was what sort of crazy fool wanted
to check out how she was looking whilst her brother lay on the floor
dying.
“
What?
”
I asked.
Nick was already on his way upstairs. He understood.
“
A hand held mirror. Check he
’
s breathing.
”
I held my hand out near his mouth, he didn
’
t seem to be breathing.
In a flash, Nick was back down, he stretched out the mirror to Caroline
like it was a relay baton.
“
Here Caroline. It
’
s my Mum
’
s.
”
Caroline took the circular mirror and placed it next to Jim
’
s face.
The do-gooders had already put him in the recovery position. After an anxious wait, which can only have been a second or two, Jim
’
s breath
created a mist patch on the mirror.
“
He
’
s breathing!
”
I squealed,
“
Thank God for that! He
’
s still alive!
”
I don
’
t know whether I said this ou
t of relief that a brother who
annoyed the hell out of me, but deep down I loved, was still alive or
that Caroline and I were now likely to escape the sort of bollicking the
likes of which neither of us had ever witnessed. Jim sighed,
“
Of course I am still alive! You don
’
t die from a girl
’
s punch to the
jaw!
”
Jim put his hands down and started pushing himself up. Caroline
was
unimpressed.
“
Whoa
James! Hang on! Take it easy. Just stay still for a minute.
”
Jim laughed quietly to himself, as he got to his feet,
“
Cal, I
’
m fine. I just wanted to shit her up a little.
”
Jim gestured towards Jemma Watkinson.
“
The stupid cow cheated at chess to beat me and then punched me
in the face, I just thought it was payback time. Thought I
’
d scare her a
bit!
”
“
You had us all scared, mate,
”
Nick Birch piped up,
“
now are you
sure
you are OK?
”
“
I could do with some ice on this jaw.
”
Caroline and Nick went either side of Jim and helped him into
the kitchen. Jim couldn
’
t help having a dig at Jemma Watkinson as he
passed her.
“
If I was a lesser man, I would sue your tits off for this!
”
I think he
’
d been watching too many American law shows! For the
last fifteen years, Jim had driven me mad, personality wise we were poles
apart and I had often resorted to overcoming my intellectual weakness
by using physical force against him myself, but I felt genuinely sorry for
him this time. He was trying to put a brave face on events, trying to
spin it all in his favour, pretending it was all an act, but in reality he had
been laid out by a punch from a girl and was no doubt hurting physically
and emotionally. It
’
s one thing being beaten up by your older brother
but another entirely being beaten up by a girl, in front of an audience,
at your first ever party, especially seeing as though it was the same girl
that had humiliated him at chess only ten minutes earlier!
Jemma Watkinson was still stood there and I was all set to jump in
with both feet and launch a volley of verbal abuse, then I noticed Kelly
was at her side and this lessened my anger a little. Still, irrespective of who her sister was, I still felt duty bound to say something. I composed
myself and then calmly walked over to the two of them,
“
What happened?
”
Kelly spoke on behalf of Jemma, who, to be fair, did look a little
crestfallen.
“
He,
”
she pointed at Billy McGregor who was on his way into the
kitchen,
“
said to our Jemma that he
’
d been having sex with me upstairs
and that he
’
d thrown up when he remembered I
’
m not fourteen yet.
Jemma lost it, tried to belt him, missed and caught your brother. It was
a total accident, Richie.
”
Did I believe this? I
’
m not sure. If Jemma hadn
’
t threatened to beat
Jim up ten minutes earlier, it would h
ave sounded more plausible. At
the same time though, having spent all of five minutes with Kelly, if
Billy McGregor had said to me that he had just slept with her, I would
have wanted to knock his block off too. I thought Kelly was fascinating,
beautiful, innocent, friendly, warm, honest
…
and
thirteen
…
.why did she have to be thirteen? I mentioned earlier that
I had felt an urge to protect her and if that had meant punching Billy
McGregor, I would have done it without a moment
’
s hesitation. I sought
clarification from Jemma.
“
Is this true?
”
“
Yes,
”
she seemed distant,
“
can you just leave me alone for a while,
I just need a bit of space?
”
Jemma wandered off into the study. It was strange seeing someon
e
as cocksure as Jemma being as humble as this. It was not a side of her
character I had ever seen. I was delighted Jemma was like this though,
as it gave me another opportunity to speak to Kelly again, just the two
of us.
Kelly tried to go after Jemma but I took her hand and pulled her
back.