Forever Is Over (88 page)

“
I
’
ve been to Christ Church several times since I came out of Styal
and when I was in jail, I went to chapel every day.
”

I know Christians have been accused by non-believers of sometimes
adopting a superior attitude, but Richie was the one with the superiority
complex. He looked at me as though I was a twelve year old who still
believed in Father Christmas.

“
Why would you of all people believe in God, Jemma?
”

“
What do you mean
‘
YOU OF ALL PEOPLE
’
?
”

“
Well, you haven
’
t been treated very fairly in life, have you? Beaten
by your mother, jailed for a killing you didn
’
t commit, it doesn
’
t seem
your prayers have been answered!
”

“
But look at me now! OK, my life was tough, but I came through it
and now I am getting married to you. Who
’
s to know God
’
s influence
on that?
”

“
I know!
”
Richie replied,
“
There wasn
’
t any influence! He doesn
’
t
exist!
”

Richie was often a stubborn man. If he knew something or at least
felt he knew something, he refused to back down, even when he turned
out to be wrong.

“
Richie, if you know categorically that God does not exist, why are you wasting your time persuading me? You should be out and
about explaining things to all the incredibly intelligent people who are
Christians and continue to believe because they have read the Bible,
understand it and have a true faith. People far more intelligent than
you.
”

“
Jemma, just because there are intelligent Christians, that does
not prove a thing! There are intelligent people who believe in every
religion under the sun and there are intelligent atheists. I just don
’
t
see there being a man on high, who looks down on everything we do,
keeping score and ultimately punishing us for bad behaviour like the
world
’
s Headmaster! Also, you can supposedly only get into heaven if
you believe in God, so there must be millions of cavemen and early
aborigines in Hell feeling pretty hard done to, because no-one taught
them about God. He also seems to punish every other species other than
man, which seems more than a little harsh given he created everything.
God gives the majority of humans eighty years on earth and then an
eternity in heaven, but gives caterpillars a matter of weeks, but tries to
placate them by allowing them to fly around a bit at the end!
”

Richie was in full flow now, but in a supercilious way.

“
Richie, you can trivialise Christianity if you want to, but I
’
ve read
the Bible, several times over and it gives my life meaning. I have faith
in Jesus Christ and I have faith in God. Have you ever even read the
Bible?
”

“
No. Not in full. I
’
ve read bits.
”

“
Well, how can you just dismiss it then, when you
’
ve not read it?
”

“
I haven
’
t put my hand in a fire either, but I still know it
’
s hot!
”

“
What?
”

“
Sometimes you only need a basic understanding of something to
realise how it works.
”

“
That
’
s just complete rubbish! How ridiculous! You cannot decide
there
’
s no God when you haven
’
t read the Bible!
”

“
Hypocrite!
”

Richie enjoyed this type of argument. I would get annoyed but he
would just find it all very entertaining. The advantage I had over him
though was my persistence. I would not back down.

“
Richie, why am I hypocrite?
”

“
Have you ever read the Qur
’
an?
”

“
No.
”

“
OK. You just said I couldn
’
t possibly dismiss Christianity if I
haven
’
t read the Bible. If that
’
s the case, how can you dismiss Islamic
faiths, if you haven
’
t read the Qur
’
an?
Read up on every religion, Jemma, before you decide the Christians
are right. Make an informed choice, like you
’
re telling me to do! Who knows where you
’
ll want to get married then, you may want to marry in a mosque or a synagogue. You
’
re just siding with the only religion
you
’
ve ever been taught about! That
’
s not being broadminded, it
’
s just
jumping on the bandwagon!
”

This was one of those arguments were no-one could win, as neither
of us was ever going to agree with the others viewpoint. I didn
’
t want to
win the battle though, I wanted to win the war. I wanted to get married
in a church!

“
To repeat.I have read the Bible. I understand and believe the
general message within it and I want to get married in a church. Can
you not respect my wishes?
”
Richie gave me the look he had once given me, when I had burst
out laughing and spat some of my soup out, around his parents dinner
table, when his Mum had said her so
up had been made with a lot of
“
cumin
”
.

“
This is like,
‘
there
’
s a hole in my bucket, Dear Liza,!
’
Why would
I respect your wishes, if your wishes involve m
e getting married in
a Church?
That would mean that you would not be respecting my
wishes!
”

“
Why are you so against getting married in a church, Richie?
”

“
I
’
d feel like a hypocrite getting married in a Church. Devoting my
life to you in front of a God that I don
’
t believe in!
”

             
“
So what? Why would you be bothered? If you don
’
t believe in God,
it
’
s not as though you
’
ll be punished in the afterlife, as you don
’
t even
believe there is one! I
’
d feel like I betrayed God, if I didn
’
t get married
in a Church.
”

Richie pulled another face. This one was his
“
AS IF!
”
face.

“
Betrayed God!
”
he scorned,
“
did you not betray God when you lied
under oath at your trial?
”

“
I did not lie!
”

“
You did not tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the
truth, so help you God!
”

“
I did.
”

Admittedly, I did not say this convincingly.

“
Did you mention in court that you just happened to see your sister
pushing your mother down the stairs?
”

“
Maybe not.
”

“
Maybe
…
not.
”
Richie paused between the two words for dramatic
effect.

“
But it was an altruistic lie.
”
I added in my defence.

“
God might not see it that way, Jemma.
”

Admittedly, at this stage, I was losing this battle.

“
Don
’
t give me that! You don
’
t even believe in God, Richie!
”

Richie laughed smugly,
“
I think the safest option would be for us to
get married in a Registry office. I wouldn
’
t want my bride to be getting
struck down by a lightning bolt, sent by a vengeful God, as she walks
down the aisle!
”

Richie tried to grab me in one of those bear hugs that always ended
up in sex. I resisted. I was not in the mood!

“
Don
’
t be trying it on. If I don
’
t feel you love me, you won
’
t be
having sex again this side of the twenty first century!
”

“
You
’
ve just got a cob on because you
’
re losing the argument!
”

“
No, I
’
m not! You forget God forgives those who repent of their
sins and I have truly repented of mine. I have absolutely no doubt that
I have been forgiven in the eyes of the Lord. We are getting married in
a church and that
’
s that!
”

“
Oh not, it
’
s not!
”

“
Oh yes, it is!
”

The pantomime continued into the early hours and then again in the
days that followed. Twelve months later, Richie and I were married at
Christ Church, Aughton with a reception at the Briars Hall, Lathom.
Richie did not carry a placard revealing that he was
‘
Here Under
Protest
’
!

Jim and I stood propping up the bar or to be more accurate, the bar
managed to take our weight and prop us up.

“
I
’
m going to bed!
”
I slurred, letting go of the side of the bar
tentatively, like a novice ice skater would let go of the edge.

“
NO! NO! NO! NO!
”
Jim stated, pulling me back by the shirt
collar,
“
this is your stag do, Richie, I
’
m your best man, you
’
re going
nowhere! Look at your mates, they aren
’
t falling by the wayside, they
’
re
driving hard!
”

Jim did one of those funny forward, circular rotations of his hand,
like a master of ceremonies would do in olden times when announcing
a returning knight to the Queen. In this case, there were no returning
knights, just eight deranged friends, pogoing around a Copenhagen
dance
floor in frenzied fashion, to t
he sound of Vic Reeves and The
Wonderstuff
’
s version of
‘
Dizzy
’
. T
hey were gathering up helpless
Scandanavian women like a tornado in the desert would gather up
tumbleweed.

“
Jim, I
’
ve partied hard with these boys for the last thirty six hours.
My bed is calling me now. Please just let me go!
”