Forget Me Not 1: DECEIVED (3 page)

~

“Did Azzam force himself on you?” I slam the front door shut and drop my backpack to the floor beside my bed.

Monika’s body shifts slowly under the covers as she opens her eyes and looks up at me.

“Answer me?” I hover above her, feeling angry at her for not sharing the traumatic experience with me. We’re closer than best friends. I consider her my sister…my family. It hurts me to think she tried to hide an important fact from me, no matter what her reason was. “Did he try to rape you?”

She sits up slowly. It’s evident how much effort it’s taking her to move. “Lisa.” I hear the hurt and embarrassment in her voice, when Azzam is the only one who should be embarrassed because of his violence. “I was going to tell you, but…” A tear rolls down her cheek and her gaze moves to her hands fidgeting over the covers.

I sit at the corner of the bed and wrap my arms around her shoulders, pulling her head down to my chest. “When did that happen?”

“The first time was three months ago.”

Jesus, he raped her more than once? Although my hands tighten as I imagine myself slashing his throat with the kitchen knife, I work hard not to show my anger and listen to her when she says, “The second time at the beginning of last month. The last one, two weeks ago.”

I let out a long sigh, barely containing my anger. “Did he…come inside you?”

She doesn’t answer and only nods her head, then whispers, “I know what you’re thinking, but they did a urine test in the clinic. If I was pregnant, the doctor would have told me.”

“Yeah, only if the test results show it. Perhaps it’s too early for the test to detect anything.”

She straightens up and looks at my face, her expression turning from sad to horrified as the realization hits. “I can’t be pregnant! I can’t have a child. I can barely take care of myself. How will I look after someone else? I’m ruined.” She bursts into tears and covers her face with both hands.

“Let’s not panic yet.” I rub her back in gentle strokes to calm her. “When was the last time you had your period?”

“I don’t remember. You know how irregular my periods are. Maybe three months ago?”

We should have her hormones checked. We should have enough food on the table to keep our bodies healthy. We should have enough courage to go to the police and stand up for our basic human rights. “Don’t cry. You have me. I’ll take care of you no matter what.”

My mind instantly goes to Loraine Carter’s offer of $200,000. Jesus, just counting the digits in my mind makes me feel dizzy. How much better I’d feel if I actually had the money!

We can get Monika on Medi-Cal for free health care coverage during her pregnancy, but she’ll need money for everything else. We’ll have to figure something out about the baby before the birth. With that much money, there would be enough money left for both Monika and I to study. We could have a chance at a decent life without riding busses or doing without proper medical care. Sucking off one man’s dick for that amount of money is better than $20 blow jobs off the street, which we’re heading for if we lose our current jobs.

I can’t let my friend suffer more than she already has. I can’t allow us to lose the little we have. We deserve better and now that I’ve been given a chance to make money, I can’t afford to turn it down.

My stomach growls in hunger, making me wonder about the last time Monika ate something. She’ll need to eat healthy food rather than ramen noodles and peanut butter sandwiches, which are the only food we can afford right now. If I accept Loraine’s offer, we can eat whatever we want for the first time in our lives.

We won’t have to count pennies to be able to come up with the rent. Even if I don’t manage to get down and dirty with Loraine’s husband—which is highly likely from whatever way I look at it—Monika and I can still take classes at a community college with the $20,000 I should earn from the nanny job. And if I indeed can trick him into flashing his penis at me, I will have enough money to do whatever I want. Hell, maybe we can even start up our own coffee shop.

I excuse myself to go to the bathroom and call Loraine to tell her I accept her offer. She doesn’t answer her phone and I hesitate to leave a message on her voice mail in case her husband might hear it. So I just end the call with the intention of calling her back later, while at the same time cursing my bad luck. I can’t even reach her to tell her I’m all hers no matter what. How much more pathetic can my life get?

~

When I come out of the bathroom, I find Monika already tucked under the covers and sleeping. It’s seven-thirty, although it feels like half a lifetime has passed. Even though I’m bone-tired, the shock of the day won’t let me blink an eye. So, I grab my worn-out denim jacket that was once black and walk to the public library down the street to use the internet and search for information on Loraine Carter and her multimillionaire husband. Kenneth D. Carter.

My hunger this morning when I served Kenneth his coffee wasn’t interfering with my perception of his attractiveness. He’s really ridiculously hot. At least, I won’t feel disgusted about my target if I turn out to be good enough to seduce him.

He even has a fan page on Facebook with twenty-five thousand active female members, all posting detailed information about how horny he makes them feel. I can, sort of, understand Loraine’s fears and her reluctance to remain married to him. The competition among these women is discouraging, to say the least.

According to the fan page, Kenneth is six feet four inches tall, a full foot taller than me, twenty-eight years old, nine years older than me, with a net worth of two- billion dollars from his medical device manufacturing business. I may not have an MBA, but even I know that’s a goldmine as businesses go. Now I see why Loraine would call anything less than half of his assets as measly in case of a divorce.

The longer I wade through Kenneth’s pictures on Google, the warmer I feel about the idea of trying to seduce him. The idea of ending up being number one enemy of the women in his fan club is amusing, and $200,000 cash seems to be too good to pass on. I’ll be ruining a marriage and a family, but Loraine seems to be set on doing that, with or without my help.

There’s not much to think about the offer actually. The only thing I should figure out is if Loraine is indeed being honest with me and really wants to use me to get her husband to cheat on her. She’s surely out of her mind for dismissing a husband like Kenneth. Perhaps it’s the millions that have corrupted her mind, or she’s hiding important information about Kenneth from me.

Can I do this? Seduce a man. Not just any man, but a gorgeous and powerful man like Kenneth? The answer is clearly no, even if I happened to be the prettiest girl in town. I lack the basics regarding the male race. Except for the couple of times I was forced to see penises, I’m basically clueless about how male sexuality works. Thankfully, there’s Google, and I can search for almost anything, including ways to seduce a man, within the confined walls of the library.

By the end of my computer session, I have a long list of tips from a variety of resources, from Cosmopolitan to random bloggers on the internet. It all basically comes down to being yourself, showing skin, being sweet, bating eyelashes, and lots of touching.

It doesn’t sound hard at all on paper; however, when I actually start to visualize myself trying to touch a guy while displaying half my body, my hands start sweating, and my heartbeat shoots up. I’m not the kind of girl who puts on a show to attract attention. I hate attention to begin with. How am I supposed to draw attention from a man like Kenneth?

I should have flirted with boys while I had the chance, and it’d have given me some kind of practice in the seduction field. It would be naïve of me to expect to become a high class whore from basically nothing. Loraine has a right to know what kind of person she’s hiring for the job she has in mind. It’ll be only fair for me to come clean about my almost nonexistent experience in terms of sex and men.

I can practically see her enthusiasm diminishing the second she finds out I’m not qualified to be a whore to her husband. Never in a million years would I have thought lack of knowledge of male anatomy, or the penis to be specific, would cause me to lose a chance at a dignified life.

Now I feel guilty for spending a whopping six dollars just for lunch. With that money, I could have bought enough for two meals and still have money left over for the laundry. Tears sting my eyes at the thought of feeling so guilty over spending a few dollars on a hamburger. People throw away food that costs dozens of dollars; why do I feel like I’m the only one struggling in the whole wide world?

If seducing a man is all I have to do to leave my crappy life behind, I should do it without over-thinking it to death. Kenneth had, indeed, gazed at me with a different look from the usual ones I get from other customers. Even his wife noticed it. And I shouldn’t care about getting him to cheat in the least. If his wife is okay with it, who am I to judge the appropriateness of the situation?

Instead of doubting myself, I should grab this once-in-a-life-time, game-changer opportunity with both hands and do whatever it takes to deliver the desired result.

With renewed confidence, I print out the webpages about seduction advice and call Loraine to let her know I’m up for whatever she has in mind, be it tending her kids or her husband’s penis.

~

“We’ll have to get you a whole new wardrobe.” Loraine’s professionally shaped, thin eyebrows pull together on her makeup-free face to accentuate the subtle disgust on her pursed lips as she assesses my clothes. “With these clothes, you couldn’t seduce a sex-crazed guy from a cheap bar, much less my husband. Kenneth has an impeccable taste when it comes to style, and yours is just...” An apologetic smile is all she can give me to prepare me for her appraisal. “…Just cheap.”

She’s absolutely correct. Cheap are my clothes. Cheap is me, my entire life. The will to change that is exactly why I’m here and ready to take her up on her temporary job offer as the potential seducer of her husband. That’s why I don’t and won’t mind the long and torturous ride from my home to the mansion where she lives in North Hollywood so early in the morning. Three busses and two miles of walking, to be exact. She and I live in different worlds. Literally.

“I can’t afford to buy anything new with my budget,” I say, feeling uncomfortable at having to stand while she’s comfortably settled on a leather couch, sipping coffee from an expensive-looking porcelain cup. Of course, the living room is larger than the studio apartment I share with Monika in Korea Town and decorated with luxurious furniture, worth more, I’d bet, than the total income I’ll get from my
nanny
job. The fact that there must be at least ten more rooms the size of the living room or bigger for the whole family of only four just boggles my mind.

“That’s not an issue at all.” She waves her hand in the air, drawing my attention back to her. “I’ll give you my credit card and the names of the shops I want you to visit. You can shop to your heart’s content, but when picking a piece of clothing, always have your mission in mind.”

“Of course, ma’am.” I nod in compliance and glimpse at my watch. It’s only seven o’clock. It was a miracle that I could get out of my warm bed at four o’clock to get here in time for the appointment with her.

“That doesn’t mean you should buy clothes made for whores,” she continues while I have to bite my bottom lip so I won’t respond to her with a loud yawn. “The clothes you will pick should be body-fitting, but not too revealing. If you buy something to show legs, make sure the top you buy to wear with it is conservative, and vice-versa. There’s nothing more alarming than displaying both your cleavage and your legs. You might as well confess to him everything about our plans.”

“Draw attention to only one part of the body. Got it.” I try to make a mental note of her suggestions, while keeping my ears open for the more pearls of wisdom she might have in store for me, while trying to shut down the part of my brain that’s shouting to me how ridiculous this talk is.

“You can’t go wrong with skirts. Buy at least a dozen mid-thigh skirts. My husband is a leg-man. He adores long, beautiful legs. That’s why you should be displaying yours generously, but not distastefully.”

“Skirts, right.”

I hear the front door open and close, and Loraine straightens up at her seat and curls her lips into a warm smile.

Then he walks in. Kenneth. Sweaty, breathless, his hair disheveled from the wind. And fully naked above the waist. My brain is suddenly sidetracked and the world stops spinning. My worries, the soul-crushing moments I’ll have to endure, all vanish as I lay eyes on him.

Everything in the luxurious room fades into the background while Kenneth stands tall and powerful at the center of my world. A jolt of electricity courses through my body as my gaze roams over the sizzling curves and crevices of his chest down to the mind-blowing V of his abdomen. I feel envious of the droplets of sweat dripping down that smooth, sun-kissed skin.

He’s all I can see and sense and I gape at him like a hungry animal, my mouth watering, breath locked up in my chest. A wave of his manly scent wafts toward me, swirling all around me. His smells so intoxicatingly good, I forget the existence of his wife in the same room.

His eyes find mine, but rather than returning the passion that must be burning in my blue irises, he gazes at me with confusion, even frowning. His tongue slides out and licks his bottom lip, making me gulp at the otherworldly sexiness of that brief gesture. I haven’t eaten anything since the oversized hamburger for lunch yesterday and some saltines last night; but right now, he’s all I want to taste…his lips, his pecs, and the droplets of sweat on his chest.

“Am I interrupting you?” he asks and instantly rivets his eyes on his wife.

Before I know it, Loraine stands and hurries to throw herself into his arms, pressing her body against his. His regard for her, so passionate and penetrating as he gazes at her, speaks volumes of the deep love he must feel for her.

Something rips inside me…beneath my chest, to be very specific. It might be my heart that’s now filled with jealousy. I’ve always envied people for having their parents, family, and good jobs, but I’ve never cared about their lovers…until now.

Now jealousy of Loraine for having Kenneth as her husband is turning my heart black with hatred. And the more she lingers in his arms and the harder she presses her crotch against his, the darker my heart becomes. The pang of jealousy overcoming me makes me dizzy but is also strangely empowering. I’ve never known that side of me, the possessive side.

Kenneth lovingly caresses Loraine’s thick blonde curls and runs his hands alongside her back and down her ass. It’s like watching a porn movie, their public make-out looking equally arousing and disgusting. The sizzling passion and the enormous chemistry between their bodies are palpable even to the point that I can see the sparks flying as they feel each other up.

I finally find enough courage to turn my eyes in the opposite direction to escape the sight. I’m not sure how Loraine will come to terms with having Kenneth cheat on her—that is, if I can seduce him, of course. But, from what I can see, he only has eyes for his woman.

“Love, let me introduce you our new nanny. Lisa Walsh.” I hear Loraine’s musical voice and glance up at her as both walk toward me while holding hands. Why did she want her husband to cheat on her again?

“What happened to Mrs. Whittier?” Kenneth asks softly, the sexiness of his voice brushing the depths of me teasingly. Goodness gracious, he’s irresistible and I’m glad I’m not hired just to babysit his kids.

“You know her problems with her lungs.” Loraine runs her hand down his bare chest slowly as if she wants to draw my attention to his chest, her eyes following the trail of her fingers on his body as she speaks. “I didn’t want our kids to catch a bug from her. I let her go yesterday and hired Lisa.”

“Lisa,” he repeats and turns to me. Somehow hearing my name from his beautiful lips sends a violent shiver all over my body and I fight hard not to show it. “Pleasure to meet you.” He offers his hand.

I slide my hand into his and quickly pull it back, trying not to let the feel of his skin further poison my mind. This is absurd. Up until yesterday, I was completely content with my existence as an asexual being as long as Monika and I had our health, now it seems I can feel nothing but passion and sexual arousal.

“Nice to meet you, sir.” My eyes dart down to the floor quickly, and I take a step back.

“She’ll be riding with you and the kids in the mornings to drop them off at the daycare,” Loraine explains, her hands circled around his arm, her head resting on his shoulder.

“I wish you’d told me about it sooner,” Kenneth says, again softly as if she’s an injured child that needs to be treated gently.

“I didn’t want to bother you. You already have enough on your plate with all your projects. Besides, Scott ran an extensive background check on her. She’s clean as a whistle.”

Kenneth’s face beams with a warm smile as he slides a finger beneath his wife’s chin and lowers his head to leave a tender kiss on her lips. Another round of jealousy washes over me, making me feel ridiculous. Both Loraine and I gape after him as he bounces up the stairs, his leg muscles flexing like a well-oiled machine, his firm and round ass a work of art. I can easily say lack of motivation won’t be a problem on my way to completion of my task.

“I guess that went well.” Loraine clasps her hands together before her chest, exhaling a long breath, and looks down at the golden watch around her wrist. “Time to meet Jamie and Jack.”

Jamie is five and a carbon copy of her mother with her long blonde hair and large blue eyes. Jack is, to my surprise, a baby of nine months. With her great body, Loraine doesn’t look like she gave birth to a child less than a year ago. In fact, she doesn’t look like she’s ever been pregnant in her life.

After quickly changing his diaper and clothes, Loraine gently lifts him up from his bed and hands him to me. I have never before held a baby, so I wrap my arms tightly around him to make sure I won’t drop him. He smells like caramel candies and is very soft. I loosen my grip around his cuddly body and glance down at him with a smile. He doesn’t cry or show any discontent at finding himself in a complete stranger’s arms.

“Okay, let’s go have breakfast,” Loraine announces and holds her daughter’s hand as they walk in front of me. While walking down the stairs, I fear I’ll slip any moment and the baby will fly out of my hold and land head-first on the floor.

I should have googled how to take care of an infant rather than the ways to seduce a man, because I have no idea how to even place the baby into the high chair and struggle to get him inside. Loraine asks me to warm up his pureed food and prepare his milk. I guess he’s not old enough to drink from a glass. It’s little Jamie who explains to me where the baby’s food and formula are and how I should prepare it, rather than Loraine who is busy checking her phone.

Either I have a secret talent for babysitting, or Loraine’s kids are the easiest children on earth, because less than half an hour into my crash course of feeding children, both Jamie and Jack finish their breakfast. I clap my hands joyously once all the food is safely transferred into their stomachs because I hate having to throw away food for obvious reasons.

A subtle but powerful scent of body wash mixed with cologne fills my nose before Kenneth steps into the kitchen. I draw in a sharp breath of air as my head turns in his direction. My eyes can hardly resist how incredible he looks in his crisp white shirt and blue jeans. His golden-brown hair is brushed back, displaying the gorgeous contours of his face. My stomach makes a summersault at the sight of his raw masculinity.

With an air of undeniable confidence, he walks past me and stops at the table to give each member of his family a kiss on the top of the head. I watch him, breathless and still, until he settles on the chair beside his wife.

“I’ll work from home for a few hours. Can you drop off the kids today?” he asks of Loraine as she pours him coffee.

Loraine gives him a reassuring smile and circles her hand around his bicep. “Sure. It’s better that way actually, because I can introduce Lisa to the teachers and show her around the daycare.”

They’re too touchy-feely, too loving to each other. How I’m supposed to break through that love and get into Kenneth’s bed is a mystery to me.

The daycare and the kindergarten visits go smoothly despite the suspicious looks I get from the teachers. Thankfully, Loraine drives me to a few stores on her list and helps me pick out clothes that will make me look like a high-class prostitute rather than a nanny. Body-hugging summer dresses, mini-skirts, tank tops…all in bright red, pink, or blue. Lingerie that I’d be ashamed to look at if I weren't forced to, much less have the courage to put on. The only modest piece of clothing she buys for me is a pair of jeans, and even those are so skinny and thin, I feel naked inside them. As a final destination, she drives me to a hair salon to get my hair dyed a light shade of blonde.

The girl looking back at me through the mirror at the hair salon isn’t the honest and innocent orphan who worked her ass off to survive. This new girl is manipulative, opportunistic, and ready to hurt anyone on her way to get what she wants. I shiver at the tangible possibility that I might indeed become that girl.