Authors: Michael Bray
“That him?” Alex asked.
Billy nodded. He wished he had been given more time to explain to Alex because as he watched his friend, it wasn’t fear he saw but anticipation, and perhaps just a little excitement.
“Hide!” Billy blurted as he heard the engine of the van switch off.
“I’m not hiding. I’m gonna confront this guy.”
“Please, we don’t know for sure he’s lying.”
“We don’t know he’s not. The more you comply, the more power he has over you. I know about shit like this, it’s like before a fight, when an opponent is trying to intimidate you.”
“This isn’t a fucking cage fight.” Billy hissed, gripping the edges of the dining table as he heard the dim sounds of the man from Trans Energy whistling that annoyingly familiar tune as he approached the house.
“We need to stand up to this guy, show him we aren’t afraid,” Alex said, standing and staring down the hallway at the front door.
“I am afraid!” Billy said, and that at least, got Alex’s attention. “It’s my family, it’s a risk I’m not willing to take. Please, just get out of sight until we know what’s going to happen.”
Alex nodded. “You’re right. I’m sorry man.”
He looked around and then headed for the cellar door. “I’ll be listening. If things sound like they are getting crazy, I’m coming out.”
Billy nodded, only half listening himself. Alex lingered for another few seconds then walked quickly into the basement, fearlessly heading down into the darkness and out of sight. A split second later, the front door opened, and those heavy work boots made their way down the hall.
The man from Trans Energy was carrying a large box as he came back into the kitchen. His face was damp with sweat, which glistened in the gloom.
“I got all the parts for the repair job. It could take a couple of hours you....”
He set the box on the kitchen counter and whipped his head towards Billy, who almost screamed outright. The man’s expression was a terrifying rictus of hate and disgust.
“SNIFFERBLOBS! YOU HAVE SNIFFERBLOBS IN HERE!” He screamed, taking two quick steps towards the table and tipping it aside, sending its contents spilling across the kitchen. Billy couldn’t move. He was frozen in place as the man strode towards him and grabbed him by the shirt, leaning close.
“You brought Snifferblobs in here! I knew you had squeakers!” He hissed, his disgusting breath almost making Billy retch.
His mind screamed at him to do something, to say something, but he couldn’t move, or react. He could only stare wide-eyed into this deranged man’s eyes and wait for death. The small of his back was sweaty where the handle of the gun pressed against it, but Billy was simply too afraid to reach for it.
“Make mine silly won’t you? I'll show you and those squeakers. I’ll show you all!” He cackled as he released his grip on Billy and reached down to his tool belt, unhooking the pipe wrench.
“You can’t keep them. Good pets they don’t make. Don’t you see they keep breeding?”
There was an almost pleading tone to the man’s voice as he hit the business end of the wrench against his grubby, open palm.
“I’ll show you, I’ll show you all!” He cackled as he released his grip on Billy.
“I’ll show you, I’ll show you all!”
“Hey!” Alex said confidently.
The man didn’t immediately turn towards Alex, but locked eyes with Billy and smiled secretively, as if the two were in league against Squeakers, Snifferblobs and whatever else was troubling the deranged man. He slowly turned towards where Alex stood at the entrance to the basement, then smiled at him, speaking in a whisper.
“I could smell you, squeaking Snifferblob. I could smell you bad. Ha!”
Billy was watching, and although he couldn’t be sure due to the poor light, he thought he could finally see fear on his friends face.
“Look pal, I don’t want any trouble here. Leave now, and we don’t have to take this any further.” Alex said, holding his hands out palms up and trying to sound confident, the register of his voice was a little too high.
“Don’t think you can fool me, Snifferblob. Remember what you did to my daddy and his good egg nest?” The man shrieked, fidgeting from foot to foot as he took a cautious step towards Alex.
“Look pal, I have no idea about any of that. My friend here would like you to leave. I do too.”
The man from Trans Energy turned towards Billy, his face betrayed and hurt. He resembled a spoiled child who had just been told ‘no’ for the first time.
“He wouldn’t say that we are going to fix the genny and get rid of you squeaker pests. Tell him it’s not true!” He barked at Billy, who couldn’t answer. He was too afraid to do anything but watch.
“Hey!” Alex said, growing more confident. The man turned back towards him. He was close to tears, his bottom lip trembling as he glared at Alex.
“We were going to kill the squeakers, you damn Snifferblobs always get in the way,” He whined, sounding more and more like a child than a giant of a man wielding a pipe wrench. Billy could sense a definite shift in the balance of power, and it seemed Alex was now in control.
“Look this has obviously been some kind of a mistake. There are no squeakers or… anything else here. You made a mistake.”
“No.” The man said, shaking his head.
“Last chance. If you don’t get out of here now, I’ll be forced to make you leave.”
“Sniffers can’t fly. Every mother knows that eh?”
“Take it easy. Calm down and put down the wrench.”
“No, I won’t do that.”
“Come on, we are all friends here, right?”
The man hesitated, licking his lips as he flicked his gaze from Alex to Billy.
“I... I guess so, yeah. Why not?”
“Okay, that’s good. This is a bad time. No visitors today.”
“He called. He called the number for a fix.” The man said, pointing at Billy.
“He obviously made a mistake.” Alex locked eyes with Billy beyond the man, then turned his attention back to him.
“Let’s call it a night. You have earned a day off work, right?”
“Well, I could use a break...” the man mumbled, scratching at his greasy, matted hair. “I haven’t been sleeping much lately.”
“Then just go home. We can manage fine enough here.”
The man hesitated, and chewed on a filthy fingernail as he tried to decide what to do.
“You Snifferblobs would tell me anything. Devious, devious creatures. Not like us, not like us.”
“Just leave. Go home, get some rest.” Alex said, trying to soothe and coax the man. “Put the wrench down, and leave.”
“I made a mess now.” The man mumbled, glancing towards the table, which was on its side by the sink.
“That’s okay, we'll take care of it,” Alex said, taking a cautious step forward.
“You promise me you aren’t lying Snifferblob? Swear on your whore mother?” The man said, narrowing his eyes.
“I swear, I’m not lying. I don’t want any trouble.”
Billy watched the man deflate as his arms fell to his sides.
“I’m sorry,” He said, half turning towards Billy. “This Snifferblob of yours has the devil's tongue!”
Billy saw it coming, but couldn’t react in time. The man from Trans Energy whirled around and swung the wrench towards Alex. Only his fighter’s training gave him the reaction speed enough to throw a defensive arm up towards his face, but bone was never going to beat steel, and Alex’s forearm shattered with a sickening crack. He roared in pain, staggering into the kitchen counter and sending plates and dishes crashing to the floor. The man took another step forward, closing in on Alex and leaving him nowhere to run. For all the confidence and bravado, he never stood a chance.
With his shattered arm hanging limply at his side, there was nothing he could do.
“Billy, help me!” He screamed, realising too late the danger he was in.
Come on legs, push up out of this chair.
Yep, in a minute chief.
Come on arms. Grapple this guy before he attacks your friend.
Right away boss. Just as soon as I get my head around all the crazy shit that is happening here.
He wanted to help, he really did, but his body seemed to be in protest because he could only sit there and stare open mouthed as the man went to work on his friend. Billy had once dropped a watermelon out of a bag when he was taking the shopping into the house, and the sound as the wrench connected with his friends head was similar a sloppy, wet crunch. He expected Alex to scream, but other than a dull grunt, he remained silent as his skull was destroyed by the man.
“Filthy lying Snifferblob! Eat my breakfast with no mouth now haha!” He gibbered and cackled as he brought the wrench down time and time again, streaking the walls with blood which looked black in the darkness. When he was finished he stood, his overalls splattered with claret, his hands and arms the same. The fringe of his black hair had covered his eyes, and as he slicked it back into place, he left a bloody smear on his forehead. Breathing hard, he turned towards Billy, smiling broadly, as if expecting praise for his actions.
“You have to watch those Snifferblobs,” He said, pointing the bloody wrench at Billy for emphasis. “Lies are all they know. Can you smell it?”
Billy could only smell his own sweat and the coppery undercurrent of fresh blood. He was too afraid to argue, and so he nodded.
“I thought he had you too. He would have eventually you know.” The man said, shrugging his shoulders.
He was perfectly calm, and as he walked towards Billy he left bloody footprints behind. He lifted the table back into an upright position and slid it roughly back into place.
“Good news about the repair,” He said as he grabbed the large box from the counter and set it on the table.
Billy was astounded by the way this man was calm, and the way he was acting as if nothing had happened, as he opened the lid to the box and started to rummage inside.
“Some of these parts were expensive, but I’ll throw in killing the Snifferblob for free,” He said, tipping a wink at Billy.
“Wha… where is my wife?” He heard himself say from some faraway disjointed place. He still couldn’t take his eyes from the pulpy, shattered remains of his friend who was in the corner, one arm, the broken one, leaning against the wooden paneling of the counter at a nauseatingly unnatural angle.
The man didn’t answer, instead, he went on looking through the box.
“You should have known better than to move to an area like this. Did you know Sniffers are rampant here? All they do is eat and fuck and breed.” He shook his head in disgust. “Awful things. You should think about moving if you don’t mind my say so sir.”
“Please… tell me my wife is okay.”
He paused, narrowed his eyes and looked at Billy.
“She isn’t a Snifferblob is she?” He asked, putting a bloody hand to the wrench in his belt, which was still matted with hair and clumpy flesh.
“No, no she isn’t.” Billy blurted. He swallowed with some effort and thought about the gun in his jeans.
“That’s good.” The man said, returning to rummaging through the box. “Because if she was, it would change this entire dynamic we have here. And I think we are heading towards having a great friendship, don’t you?”
Billy nodded, doing whatever he could to keep the man happy. He didn’t like the way the conversation was heading, however and decided to try and steer it in a different direction.
“So, what’s in the box?” He asked.
“Ah!” The man said, clapping his bloody hands together. “I’ll show you. These are the parts I need to fix the generator.”
He set out the items on the table, and Billy found he wasn’t nearly as shocked as he would have expected. Afraid, yes, but not shocked.
The first item was what looked to be two rusty old cans taped together with an antennae of sorts made from a short branch. Next was a square of long grass complete with earth. The next item was the head of a deer. It appeared to have been roughly severed, and it made a wet sound when it was set on the table. An hour ago, such a thing would have caused revulsion. Billy barely gave it a second glance.
“Oh!” The man added, flashing a sick grin. “I got you something to help with your infestation problem.”
“Infestation?”
“You know, the Snifferblobs,” He whispered, jabbing a thumb towards Alex’s corpse. “This will keep them away. Just put it out in front of your door before you go to bed and they won’t come in.”
He lifted the object out of the box with two hands and set it on the table, and this time, Billy did react, pushing himself away from it.
It was a human head. One which, as he looked more closely at it, realised he recognised. It belonged to their neighbour, Conwell, he with the red barn from down the road. His lower jaw was missing, and sturdy branches jammed into each hollow eye socket. Around the head, was an elaborate cage made of more branches and tied with string, which in turn connected to the branches jammed into the eye sockets of Billy’s neighbour. Conwell's tongue had been nailed horizontally to the front of the makeshift cage, and bizarre markings, which could have been words, had been carved into it.