Fort Laramie (13 page)

"Tom, I'm sorry! Truly, I never meant to hurt your feelings - just to help Julie bring Adrian down a notch. I didn't know what their fight was all about."

"Well the trick about vengeful behavior is that you can't control whether people take it personally or not. For me, it was personal. Very personal."

Carrie didn't know what to say, so she said nothing. The silence in the van was so heavy, it was palpable. She had to do something, say something, to make things right again. "Spank me, Tom. Please?"

"No," he said.

"But, Tom! I'm sorry! I said I was sorry!"

"I know. And I wish I believed you. But I've spanked you three times already, and if anything, your behavior is worse."

"It's your fault, you big oaf!"

"Talk to me, Carrie. I want to understand what's going on inside that crazy head of yours, but talk respectfully. I will not tolerate name calling."

"You said that after a spanking, all was forgiven and forgotten. So yesterday, I was rude and you spanked me for it. But then this morning, you were checking up on me, as though you didn't trust me! You lied! You didn't forgive me!"

Tom stared at her, the tension suddenly leaving his jaw. Then he looked down sheepishly. "You know, you're right, Carrie. I didn't trust you. I am so anxious about this internship, and you've put it in jeopardy several times already. I was worried that you would screw things up again. And I was checking up on you. I'm sorry. Will you forgive me, honey?"

Tears spilled down her face. "Yes, Tom! Of course I will. Do you still like me? At least a little? Or are you giving up on us?"

"Come here, you nut," he said, tugging her over the center console onto his lap.

"Name calling!"

"It isn't name calling if it's the truth. You are a nut, Carrie. I'm so in love with you, that I pursued you for two semesters, even though you didn't give me the slightest bit of encouragement. I'm so in love with you, that even if this program fails and I flunk out and I never get my doctorate, I will still love you. I will always love you, dear. I've been afraid to tell you how much I love you, because I didn't want to scare you away - but now you know. I'm not going anywhere. You're stuck with me, babe."

Carrie hugged him, kissed him, and they made love in the back seat of the van. But before he took her back to the campground, he did give her that spanking she had earned. It was short and hard and effective, and after that, they made love again, even though he kept saying that post-spanking sex was not supposed to be a reward. Later, as they snuggled inside his little tent, Carrie wondered if her bottom could survive a long-term relationship with him. And she decided that it could.

Adrian eyed Julie as she slurped the bitter coffee. "We have some talking to do, princess."

"Stop calling me that," she snapped.

"I will when you stop acting like one."

She gave him an icy glare, the kind that had stopped lesser men in their tracks. Adrian remained unfazed, which irritated her. So she switched tactics, trying to seduce him instead. She put an arm around him and slipped onto his lap. She licked his ear, then whispered to him. "Why don't we go find someplace to kiss and makeup."

"Because you're drunk," Adrian said, standing abruptly. She nearly fell to the floor. He grabbed her quick and slammed her butt down into a chair. "Finish your coffee," he barked.

"You're no fun." Julie took another sip, half tempted to throw it at him. He must have read her mind, because he took the cup away from her before she could act upon it.

"That's it.  We're leaving," he announced.

"Who the hell do you think you are, Mr. High and Mighty? I'm not going anywhere with you."

"I don't know what you think I did to you, princess, but vandalizing my tires was overkill. I should just report it to the police and let them take care of you."

"No! Don't do that - what will it do to your friend's project? What will happen to the internship?" Julie suddenly didn't sound so drunk.

"You should have thought of that before you decided to get Carrie involved in your mean little prank. He loves her, you know. And now he's going to have to spank her."

"Well, lucky for me, we don't have that problem. You hate me, so why don't you just shut up and take me home."

"I do not hate you!" Adrian said that too loudly, and other customers were starting to notice. "I like you. A lot," he confessed. "Maybe even more than that. But you are such a porcupine. Or a chameleon. One day you’re a loving and affectionate. The next day you've got your claws out. I don't know where I stand with you. And what's more, I don't think you know, either. Who hurt you so badly, that you're afraid to love anyone? Not even yourself?"

Julie didn't answer, but she burst into tears. Adrian comforted her, but her sobs increased. It was time to take this conversation someplace more private. Unfortunately, the bartender headed their way, looking concerned.

"Are you all right, missy?" he asked.

"Yes," she sobbed.

"No, she isn't," Adrian said. "My wife has had a really rough day, so I'll be taking her home now."

The bartender backed off once he heard that they were married. "Okay," he said. "You take good care of her, you hear? We don't take kindly around these parts to folks who mistreat their ladies."

"Yes, sir," Adrian said. "I'll take very good care of her. Good night, sir."

"I'm not your wife," Julie sobbed. "You wouldn't want me. No one wants me."

Adrian shut her up with a kiss. Then while she was reeling from that, he quickly ushered her out the door. He wanted her in the worst way. He wanted to take her hard. He wanted to take her tenderly, passionately. He wanted to show her how much he cared about her, and then he wanted to bust her butt for the prank she'd pulled on him. But he wouldn't do any of that tonight. Tomorrow, after she'd sobered up, would be soon enough. But there was no way in hell he was going to let her sleep without him again. Luckily, Carrie was tucked inside Tom's tent, so Adrian stretched out next to Julie, letting her curl up into his shoulder. Before long she was snoring softly, undoubtedly from the alcohol. He kissed her forehead. "I'm in love with you, Julie," he confessed, knowing she couldn't hear him. "I have no idea what to do about it. But God help me. I'm in love."

Carrie was sitting very uncomfortably the next morning, but she noticed that Julie had no problems at all. That stung. It had been Julie's idea! It was so unfair. She didn't like her best friend very much just then. She would forgive her eventually... but it would take some serious apologizing on Julie's part. Then she heard Julie groan and grip her head. Ah... she had a hangover. Maybe Adrian just hadn't spanked her last night because she was too drunk? Besides, Carrie would take a spanking over a hangover any day.

"Good morning, Julie," she said loudly, engulfing her friend in a hearty hug.

"Go away," Julie moaned. "Quietly. Please... just let me die in silence."

"Feeling a little hung over?" Carrie asked, still speaking in a loud voice.

"Carrie, enough of that," Tom warned. Carrie rolled her eyes, but she obeyed. Her irritation with her girlfriend wasn't enough to risk a spanking from her boyfriend. "I'll have another cup of coffee, kind sir," she said.

Tom kissed her forehead, then refilled her cup. "Hurry up, brat. We don't want to be late."

"Aw, kissy, kissy, kissy," Jason groaned. "The next internship, you have to bring an equal number of girls and boys. This is killing me!"

The other boys laughed heartily, although Carrie's face flushed scarlet.

"Tom, Julie and I will come over later. She's not feeling well this morning, and we have some things to discuss. You go ahead without us."

Tom nodded. "Take your time. Okay folks, let's lock and load!" He opened the passenger door for Carrie, and waited for her to climb in before he fastened her seat belt. "Don't ever sit in the back again," he said quietly. Then he softened his command with a single word. "Please."

Carrie gave him a tremulous smile. "Yes, sir."

"Good girl. You're learning."

"You brat!"

"That's colonel brat to you."

"Yes, sir, brat sir, Colonel brat, sir!"

Tom laughed as he started the engine. "Catch you later," he called out the window.

"He's going to spank her now, isn't he," Carrie said quietly.

"Don't you think he should?"

She shifted awkwardly in her seat. "I was rather annoyed that she hadn't been spanked last night. It was her idea, after all!"

"And you didn't have to listen to her. It was your idea to go along with it."

She nodded. "I know."

"So, are we good?"

She smiled brightly. "Very good."

"Good."

Then Carrie turned away. But what about her big lie?

Adrian poured Julie another cup of coffee and offered her some aspirin. "You drink much?" he asked.

"Not like that. I hate the hangovers."

"I did, too. I haven't been drunk like that in years. It's pretty juvenile. I expected more from you."

"Well, sorry to disappoint you," she snapped.

"You disappointed yourself. Why don't you like yourself?"

"I'm fine. Just leave me alone, will you?"

"Can't do that. You see, I care about you. And I want to know why you're exhibiting such self-destructive behavior. Was it an old boyfriend? Were your parents cruel? Talk to me, Julie."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"I can see we're going to have to do this the hard way," he said, moving her coffee out of the way.

"No!" she shouted, but too late. Too slowly. He had her up out of her seat and over his lap so fast, she didn't know how he did it. Suddenly she was face down and dangling above the ground, as he sat on top of the picnic table. She felt very unbalanced, the blood rushed to her pounding head ache, and she thought she might be sick. "Please, don't do this now," she begged.

"The time to talk is over. I asked you a simple question. You brushed me off. That's not the way to communicate, princess. So here it is!" With that, he brought his hand down swiftly across her pajama bottoms, which offered very little protection. A moment later, he removed the pajama bottoms entirely.

"No, no, don't do this! Stop it!" Julie screamed.

Adrian laughed. "This is for not answering me, Julie baby. We won't get to the spanking you've earned for vandalizing my tires until later. I've got all day, sweetheart. The question is, how long can your bottom last?"

He spanked her hard, remembering that the first spanking he'd given her had been rather severe, and she'd taken it well. Some folks tolerated a higher level of pain, and Julie's was pretty near spectacular. For that reason, he'd come well prepared. He'd brought out her hairbrush earlier, and his belt, and a couple of wooden spoons. He was no dummy - why make his hand suffer as much as her bottom? After a few dozen warm up slaps, he started with the spoon. Julie kicked and screamed, but it was good for her. She had so much bottled up inside. He was glad there were no other campers in the campground and the old woman who owned it was mostly deaf. He went through both wooden spoons, the hair brush, and then started with his belt before he felt the change come over Julie. She relented. She broke down and sobbed with sincere feeling. She submitted to him, no longer resisting her punishment, but accepting it, and even welcoming it.

"We're almost done here for now, Julie," he said gently. "Ten more, and then we'll talk. But if I don't like your answers, we'll come right back here. Do you understand?"

"Yes," she sobbed.

"Yes, what?"

She didn't answer fast enough, so he reinforced his words with a flurry of hard smacks to the backs of her thighs.

"Yes, sir! Yes, sir, I understand!" she screamed.

"You have a lot of spirit, Julie. I love that about you. It drives me nuts, too. Okay, here we go. Ten more."

He gave all ten of the last swats to the backs of her thighs. She was sobbing, but she didn't resist. And then he held her there, still face down over his lap. This had worked before - trying to talk to her face was impossible. So he would talk to her throbbing, well-punished bottom.

"Why are you trying to push me away," he asked.

"I'm not!"

"Wrong answer," he said, delivering ten more swift smacks to her bottom.

"Please stop that," she begged.

"No. Now, answer me."

"I don't know!"

"Wrong answer." Ten more smacks.

"Damn you!"

Ten more smacks. "You know, Julie, that I'm not going to stop. I can do this all day. Can you?"

"I'll talk! I promise! But please let me up... I'm going to be sick!"

"You promise?”

"Yes."

Adrian hoped she meant it, but he let her up. She did look a little green around the gills, too. She ran off towards the restroom, making it only halfway before she doubled over and puked. It was just as well. Now she might feel better. She kept going to the restroom. He expected she'd want to wash her face and compose herself. It wasn't like she could go anywhere - he had the only vehicle, and he would never leave the keys in it again.

She took her own sweet time, but eventually she returned and she did look a bit better. "I need a drink of water," she said first, stalling the inevitable.

"One drink. Then you talk."

"I don't like to talk about myself," she hemmed.

"I figured that out about a month ago."

"We weren't even dating yet!"

"Just because you ignored me, doesn't mean the feeling was mutual. I've been watching you, how you interact with your friends, your classmates. I think that you act all high and mighty to keep people at a distance. You don't like to be hugged, because you might actually start to like it. And the real reason you flattened my tires isn't because you were mad at me, but because you don't trust me. You hoped I'd be so angry I'd give up on you - on us - and you'd feel vindicated, because you'd been right all along. You're unlovable. What I want to know is why?"

"Who gave you an honorary degree in psychology," she snapped.

"You have about two seconds to start talking, or we do it my way," Adrian threatened.

"Just wait! Wait a minute. Okay? Why do you like me, anyway? Even my parents didn't like me! My mom, she dumped me with my dad so she could run off with her boyfriend. And Dad, he bought me stuff - tons of stuff, but he never once hugged me. He couldn't hug me. He didn't know how to love anyone- that's why Mom left him. He thought that if he just gave me lots of stuff, it would show that he loved me, but in the end, it was just a lot of stuff. You know! So if I act like a princess, it's because that's what he wanted me to act like! A cold, indifferent princess, that everyone admired, but no one really knew. And that's it! That's all there is. Really. So you see, I'm just not that interesting after all."

She was sobbing hard, barely able to speak. Adrian wrapped her in his arms and comforted her.

"I think you're fascinating, darling. And you didn't tell me anything I hadn't already guessed. But you needed to say it for yourself. You see, when you keep that hidden inside, it has power over you. It seems so much more real, like monsters under the bed. But when you say it out loud, you can hear how silly it sounds, and it loses some of its power."

"I don't understand," she gasped.

"Not yet, you don't. But you will, baby. You will. One day you'll wake up and realize that your dad did the best he could. Maybe he was emotionally crippled. Maybe he was just an idiot. But he tried to show you that he loved you in the only way he knew how. The important thing to remember is that he did love you. In his own way. Your mom was the idiot, to go away and not take you with her. She knew her husband was incapable of expressing himself. Why she thought that would be a good environment for her precious daughter, beats the hell out of me. But I do love you, and I'm more than capable of showing you exactly how I feel about you. I will kiss you, and hold you, and argue with you, and spank you when you have it coming, but I will not ignore you. I promise you that."