Four Times Blessed (14 page)

The other kids said it was cheating after they joined us at the rendezvous, dripping, exhausted, singed, and they found out we’d already won the problem set. The instructors made them do push-ups for complaining. Looking back, it’s no surprise people gave me cold looks, after that. I think they were relieved when I got moved to the TAG team.
  

So that’s how I ended up there. Another kid got in after he hit a target between the eyes across state lines. And another finished some obstacle course in record time, while carrying his partner who’d broken his leg. That’s how most of us got there. Flashes of impressiveness, I guess they were.

But this commander kid, he was brilliant all the time. Naturally brilliant, and he knew it. I’d say ninety percent of the words he ever spoke to me were those orders, to speak something in human, specialist. And make it something I can use. I remember during one final exam, in Field Studies, the enemy team gas-attacked our position and he wanted to know why I let them break through our chatter bubble and find us. And tell it to him in human, specialist.

They tore it down, hard, sir. Well fix it. I am, sir. Great, tell me when you did, specialist. Yes, sir. Private Hosea, don’t just leave him laying there, pick up Private Dennison and stick a mask on him, will you? There’s vomit. And Specialist High-Land wants you to scoop the fucking barf out of his Goddamn mouth, I don’t wanna tell his mommy her baby hero died on his sandwich, if that happens, bitch is yours, Hosea. Sir? What! Not fixed but I did find their position. Really? Yes. Ok, hit them with something good and old-school, I want to hear them screaming from here. Yes, sir. Next time specialist, I’m buying you some steel to make that bubble-shit with. That would be nice, sir, but diamonds would be better, I think, hard plus they’ll play with the light. Diamonds then. Thanks, sir, oh! got it. A whole truckload of fucking diamonds, specialist. Thank you, sir. Goddamnit specialist, what’d you do to them, fucking Hadley’s out there trying to take his pants off. Oh, yeah, that’d be the grove of double-poison oak I just sent them into, sir. Oh, huh, I was thinking napalm or something but this works too, I guess, fuckit specialist, what’m I gonna do with you, alright, let’s move out people, eyes on me, Hosea, get the specialist and make sure she doesn’t trip on a daisy, on my signal in….
 

             
“You don’t look like someone I’d want to drag out onto a battlefield.” Rude boy. But fair enough.

             
“Yes, well, let’s hope you never do,” is what I say to him. And then I really do go. With fish and two new feathers.

             
At exactly five o’clock, I poke my head out the stairwell, don’t see the man with the ill-fitting uniform and skating run, and sprint.

A split second later, I wash up, throw on a dress Andrew hasn’t seen me in yet we don’t think, and put powder on my sweaty face while Eleni and my zizi try to fan me with their aprons.

              They speed-walk with me back down the hill and I worry about my zizi who I think will chug along right off this island. Thankfully, we all make it. I tell her I feel like I was just here five seconds ago, like the whole day didn’t just happen. 

She tells me to try to relax, kisses me, and pats my hair down. Then she starts the journey home doing a much better impression of an old lady, and I do relax a little bit. Eleni says she’s going back too, but I watch her slip into the undergrowth. Then I hear Cassie’s squeal. Eleni’s hush.

              Andrew has set up a little dot of a table by his boat. I smile when he pokes a head over the railing and slides down the steps. I kiss him on the cheek, rather relieved he didn’t just tumble to his death, and ask how his meeting at the base went today.

The sun is still high enough that I might feel it burning but there’s a good breeze, and the shade of the boat is nice, too. He pulls out my chair.

“Very productive. I should be all set for a transfer to the Comm. division by January first.”

“That’s good news.”

He nods.

             
“How was it sailing here?”

             
“We didn’t sail here, dear. This isn’t a sailboat.”

             
“Of course. I just meant how was it…motoring…” I guess, “here, on your boat?”

             
“It’s actually a yacht.”

             
“Right…we usually just call everything a boat.”

             
“Yeah, but you haven’t been on this old girl,” he smiles and leans in. I raise my eyebrows in a go on, then, I’m ready to be impressed. Honestly I’ll listen to anything he says. I feel more at ease with him when he’s talking. 

He takes me on a one hour and thirty-seven minute long tour of the thing. We make it back to the table, finally, as he’s still teaching me about yachts. Really, it’s impressive. Boring, but impressive. I get the feeling God could’ve put anyone on the planet across the table from this boy and he could go on just as seamlessly as he is now. 

              My zizi would tell me to thank my lucky stars that it’s me He’s put here, and in fact I’m sure that’s what she’ll come in my room to tell me tonight after Eleni and Cassie report back to her.

             
I can hear them playing cards.

             
I want to go into the bushes and play cards.

             
“How do you find the food?”

             
“Oh, it’s good, thank you. I haven’t had something like this in a long time.” And that was on purpose. But I won’t say that. That would be ungracious.

             
“They have a new kiosk in the mess. Have you been there?”

             
“No, I haven’t.”

             
“Oh, well you should go. It’s great. This was their daily special. Russian?”

             
“It looks like it could be, doesn’t it.”

             
“Yes, I believe that’s it.”

             
The ethnicity of our food thus established, Andrew proceeds to make the appropriate toast. Then he proceeds to try to convince me I really must go to this new kiosk. He tells me how to get there from every building on base. I just keep telling him it sounds lovely.

             
Meanwhile, I poke at my animal-free meat and the ghostly vegetable medley. As to what the medley is made of, I cannot say, but given the cellulose I believe it is vegetable, and it would be greatly improved by some lemon. And strong hard cheese.

             
I’m sure my zizi would agree wholeheartedly with me. If she were here, she’d say it right out loud, I bet. Thank the grandmothers she isn’t here. Andrew would be repulsed.

I can’t seem to explain to her well enough that outside of here, people think milk and especially cheese are vulgar. Only barbarians eat them. But of course she’d say, Crusa, cheese is delicious. Then she’d go on and on, trying to convince my betrothed that he should eat the congealed and fermented mammary discharge of a big stinky animal.

              I sigh. Andrew is busy explaining something or other so he doesn’t notice. I pet the feather Lium gave me this morning.

             
“And then one time during my internship in the city, have you been to the city? I know you went to school nearby. I love the city, it’s the greatest place on earth.”

             
He takes a forkful of bloodless meat and puts it in his mouth.

             
Thank the grandmothers.

             
“Only for field trips,” I remark.

“Half the people are government, always in uniform. Did you know that? Odd, being away from it. I think I must have just gotten used to it because I still put mine on every morning, and then I step off the boat and see all those guys in fishing gear and you girls and I’m like, wow, I didn’t even realize I did that. I feel like the city is where I’m supposed to be. I’ll always be a New Yorker at heart. But I like it here, too. It’s like vacation.”

I sit back and wait for him to decide I’m boring and that he wants to bring me home.

              Fifty-four more minutes later, not that I’m counting or anything, he pushes his plate away. Hallelujah and amen.

             
I watch him with my chin on my fist, fascinated at how long he can go without breathing. His record over the past hour is fifteen Mississippi’s. Super impressive. I wonder if the lack of oxygen causes brain damage, which in turn compromises his social inhibition thereby both perpetuating and increasing the nonstop talking behavior.

             
“So, at Comm. HQ in the city, I’m the youngest one there by three months and twelve days. Nobody else usually gets apprenticeships at HQ. You usually have to work at a local outlet for at least two years. My instructors wrote me some great recommendations, though, and made some special calls for me.

“And plus I was the valedictorian of my class. You were too, right? Why you chose this measly outpost I do not know, but I guess you wanted to be with your family, huh? You’re so sweet. You should have come to the city, though.

“Anyways, at HQ I work with the two five-o’clock news anchors. That’s the feed your island gets, right? Since your mother. I think it’s better this place just covers weather and almanac. It makes more sense, being what it is. But being a news anchor, that’s what I want to do. Not just anybody can do it. You have to be a real leader, which I am. I did my sophomore thesis on the quantifiable qualities of great leaders throughout history, and then I compared myself to them. You read it, right? I have a lot of the most influential traits that they had. I actually scored higher than them on some measures. Of course, some were easy to beat. Like height. Most voted-in leaders are tall, but with the nutrition program I’m easily taller than 98% of the men I studied. The nutrition program is perfect for everybody. You, too. Who was your chaperone? She did an amazing job finishing you. I saw that picture on the stairs from before. Of course, anything is an improvement over those jumpsuits. But now you’re just as attractive as your cousin there, you know, the angry one. I don’t know why people say any different.”

             
I really hope Eleni’s not still in the bushes. Probably not, because she’s not stupid.

“And intellectually and discipline-wise you’re much more preferable over her. You’re pretty enough where anything extra like those two things can cancel out a multitude of sins of beauty. Some men just look at the beauty, but not me. I look at other stuff too. And you’ve got plenty of other stuff, even without considering the influence of the academy. In fact, you know you’re not really like most people from the academies. I was expecting something really different. But it’s ok. I actually like this better. It’s like you were only half there, kind of. You’re sort of soft.

“Don’t get me wrong, I like it. But don’t worry. Now that you’re marrying me, once you finish your service you can stop with all that. You’ll like that, won’t you? I thought you would. See? I already get you. This is going to work out great.”

             
I’ve tried yawning three times. The last time I didn’t even cover my mouth.

             
“And tomorrow, I’m going out to interview some lobstermen for a special segment for when I get back to the city. My producers were so excited that I was coming here. They can’t wait until they have one of their own anchored in the Islands again.”

             
I look out on the silky black water. Ask it to calm me and grant me some more patience. Because the stuff I prayed for this morning is all run out. I squint at it. I don’t think it hears me. It just lounges out there, gorgeous as always.

             
I sigh. Again.

             
There are faint shouts coming from the beach. Absolutely sure that Andrew won’t notice, I look over my shoulder to see what’s going on.

             
Someone’s redirected the electric lights with some old bits of sail and duct tape, and shined them over onto some wonky figures. Seems like they’re having a really nice time. I wish I was a drunken fisherman.