Authors: Robin Roseau
Tags: #Gay & Lesbian, #lesbian fiction, #Fantasy, #Science Fiction & Fantasy, #Fiction, #lgbt, #Paranormal & Urban, #Genre Fiction, #Lesbian, #Literature & Fiction
We weren't alone. We each weren't the last.
Finally we separated, each wiping tears from our cheeks. Sonya reached up and fingered my hair, and then she said one of the few English words I would hear from her. "Red."
I nodded and then fingered her own hair. She spoke, and it was clearly a question. Ekaterina moved marginally closer.
"Do you speak any Russian, Michaela?"
"Only the few words any America might know."
"And Sonya speaks very little English," Ekaterina said. "And so, I will translate. She asks if this is the color of your fox. She has not seen this color in a fox before."
"I resemble a North American red fox," I said. "Would she like to see?"
Ekaterina translated, and Sonya laughed, nodding her head. "Da."
I stepped away from them then turned to Lara. She and Elisabeth were standing, watching us. Carissa had a smug look.
"I told you to trust me," she said quietly. I nodded to her but walked to Lara.
"Are you okay?"
"Take your time," she said. "Take all the time you need."
I peeled out of my clothes, Lara helping me after a moment. She collected my knives and carefully set each article of clothing aside. I brushed cheeks with her, then turned back towards Sonya and Ekaterina, both of them watching me. I took two steps for them, then dived forward, shifting into fox before reaching the floor.
Sonya and Ekaterina both exclaimed, speaking rapidly in Russian. Carissa answered in Russian before speaking English. "They are surprised by the swiftness of your shift."
I looked over my head at her then flicked my tail before turning back to Sonya. I approached then turned sideways, giving her a good look. She knelt down to her haunches, speaking quietly. Ekaterina translated.
"May I touch you?"
I chuffed, but then realized I hadn't known what that sound meant when I'd met the wolves, so I wasn't sure whether she would, either. And so I moved to her, brushing my furry cheek against her smooth cheek.
Sonya buried her fingers in my fur, and she knew exactly what I would like most. I grunted my pleasure. She spoke softly, and Ekaterina continued to translate.
"You are beautiful, although this is such an unusual color to me."
I let her continue to stroke and massage me for another minute or so, but then I stepped away. I bounced over to Lara, who was watching quietly. I brushed against her then flowed into human. We spent a few minutes fixing my costume back into place. I looked a little worse for wear, I'm sure, but that was a small matter.
I turned back to Sonya and her vampire. They had been watching me while speaking in hushed, rapid words. But they stilled when I turned to them.
"You have more questions," Ekaterina declared. "Perhaps the two of you should sit. Sonya has questions for you as well." She gestured, and I nodded.
And so Sonya took Ekaterina's old seat. As soon as we were together, she took my hands. The vampire stood behind the love seat, setting her hands on Sonya's shoulders.
We both spoke at the same time. "Are there more of us?" I asked. Carissa and Ekaterina both laughed. I turned to Carissa. "What?"
"She asks the same question of you."
"I will answer for Russia if Carissa can answer for North America," Ekaterina offered. Carissa began to speak in Russian, and Ekaterina told me, "There are always rumors. Alexandra came to me almost by accident; I interfered in a hunt."
I hissed my displeasure, then apologized. "That was not for you," I said hastily.
"I didn't believe it was." She paused. "It is her choice if she wishes to tell you more. She is the last of her family unit, and while there are rumors of other foxes, neither of us know of any."
"You were always going to introduce us. What was the game earlier?"
She smiled and didn't answer. "I am sorry we do not bring better news."
I looked back down to Sonya and said to her, "You are the first fox I have seen in twenty years."
She listened to the translation and said, "For me, it is eleven."
And then we were hugging again, and we held each other for a long time, neither of us wishing to release the other.
For all we knew, we were the last living foxes on the planet, and if that were true, our species would die when we did.
Part Two
Dispute
"Are you all right?" Lara asked me later that night. We were alone in our room. We were both long out of costumes and dressed for bed.
I shook my head.
She moved to stand behind me. She knew I had been mad at her. I'd been quiet, uttering no more words than strictly necessary since taking leave of Ekaterina and Sonya. I didn't think I'd see her again, and other than race, we had nothing in common.
But I wondered if I could learn Russian before Carissa's next party. I wondered if Ekaterina would allow her to return a second time.
I stood still, staring at the contents of the dresser top, not really seeing them. Lara waited behind me, not touching me.
"What do you need right now?" she asked.
"I don't know," I said quietly. I realized I had hoped Carissa was introducing me to a male fox. I was grateful for meeting Sonya, and for knowing I wasn't entirely alone, but now it looked like there may be no remaining male foxes. I hadn't realized how much I wanted kits. Perhaps discovering I couldn't have any, perhaps coming to the realization my race was on the verge of extinction was what made it important to me.
"I don't understand why you're upset."
"Don't you?" I asked. "Between Carissa, Greg Freund, and Ekaterina, none of them can tell me whether Sonya and I are the last living foxes. My race is on the verge of extinction, and it's your race's fault."
I heard the intake of air, and then she held it before asking, "Are you blaming me?"
"No." I shook my head and repeated myself. "No. I think if it weren't for you, we'd be one fox closer to extinction by now. I couldn't survive forever as a hunter. I would have died years before we met if Wisconsin hadn't been a safe haven."
More or less, anyway.
I still didn't turn to face her.
"Are we still having a spat?" Lara asked me.
"I don't know."
"Are you going to tell me what the spat is about?"
"Like you don't know."
"I can make guesses, but I'd rather you just told me."
I thought about it before answering. Serena wouldn't have made that threat to me if Lara hadn't told her to. "Serena threatened to break my wrists."
"Ah."
I would have healed. It wasn't the sort of threat it would be for a human.
"Maybe you shouldn't threaten to stab your friends," Lara added.
I turned around and spat, "Maybe my friends shouldn't physically force my cooperation. Maybe my friends should let go when I tell them to let go. I'm not the one who grew heavy-handed first."
I crossed my arms and glared at her.
I guessed yes, we were still having a spat.
She crossed her own arms. "You told Elisabeth you would behave. You
promised
you would behave. If you had
kept your promise
, you wouldn't even have noticed anyone being heavy-handed."
"You're accusing me of breaking my promise?" I asked, my voice rising. If I was mad before, now I was livid. But then I grew calm, cool. Cold. "In what way did I break my promise?"
Her nostrils flared, but she didn't answer immediately.
"Did I at any time leave the protection of my security?" I asked. "Was I, at any time since leaving Madison, anywhere I wasn't expected to be? What
exactly
did I do to break my promise?"
"As soon as Serena pulled you away from the Santa Fe wolves, you knew she was doing it on my orders," Lara said tightly. "Behaving would have been to let her do so without making a scene. The only reason it wasn't a scene of epic proportions was because she and Eric stopped you. Were you really going to stab them in the middle of Carissa's party while I was busy facing one of the worst wolf packs in North America?"
I ignored that last question; I didn't know the answer to it, anyway. In the past, just the threat had worked, and I'd never had to carry through with it.
They had raised the stakes. And that was what was pissing me off. On top of everything else.
"What did you think was going to happen?" I asked. "Did you think they were going to start a fox hunt in the middle of Carissa's power base? What?"
"I didn't
know
!" she replied hotly. "Nor did I know how you would react. All I knew was I didn't want you anywhere near them, but if you were going to be, anyway, I wanted them to know you are well-protected."
"I can take care of myself!"
"Against a small or disorganized groups of wolves, that is true," she said. "But everyone can be overwhelmed, including you. But let's say for the sake of argument that you can protect yourself better than our enforcers can. I don't concede the point, but let's say that's true. Do you want the constant stream of wolves trying to take you? Eventually it will be Iowa all over again, or perhaps you'll just be killed in the process."
"They weren't going to try anything there!"
"No, probably not, but they needed to see you surrounded by a wall of enforcers while we're in Carissa's power base. Let them wonder what sort of protection you have otherwise. And frankly, your play at the end was perfect, moving back to Serena without prompting. Thank you."
I stared at her, not responding.
"Will you at least admit I have better perspective on how wolves think than you do?"
"Fine," I spat.
"So what's the problem? Why couldn't you just let me play it my way?"
"Why couldn't you just talk to me? If you had explained this ahead of time, maybe I wouldn't have gotten my back up."
"When was I supposed to do that?"
"Oh, I don't know. Maybe when you told Serena to break my wrists if I acted out."
"Michaela, we have talked and talked about letting me protect you. You flat out refuse."
"If you had talked to me-"
"I didn't know who was going to be there! Carissa didn't give us a list. I didn't know Santa Fe was going to be there. With most packs, I was willing to have you at my side as we greeted them. My directions to Serena covered unknown situations. We didn't discuss specifics. I made a snap decision to get you behind a wall until I had a chance to evaluate the situation. And we've talked and talked and talked about that, and you refuse to
behave
!"
"No one there was going to start anything!" I shouted. "And you know it!"
"No, I don't know it!" she shouted back. "God damn it, Michaela. Do you remember how you were during my pregnancy? That's how I feel about you all the time! Do you remember holding off our closest friends with a super soaker and a knife, afraid they might
bump
me? Was Santa Fe going to start anything tonight? No. But I had to have my head clear so I could deal with whatever politics they wanted to play, and I can't do that when all I can think about is protecting you!"
I started to open my mouth, but she cut me off.
"Don't even suggest I leave the politics to you. You don't think like a wolf any better than I think like a fox. When my head is clear, we are an amazing pair, but you still look to me for guidance during pack council meetings. But this entire trip is amazingly stressful for me, and I don't know why you can't cut me some slack!"
I turned away from her, then slipped sideways and away from her, moving to stand in front of the window, looking out into nighttime courtyard. She didn't follow me or even turn to watch me. Instead, I heard as she set her hands on the dresser, steadying herself. Her heart was pounding almost as hard as mine was.
It was several minutes before either of us spoke, and it was Lara to break the relative silence. "Do you know how hard it is for me to let anyone at all near you? Carissa took you from me once, and would love to keep you. Ekaterina wanted you. Most of the wolf packs want you, some to keep as a pet, some for a hunt. But we came anyway. It wasn't even a fight. But you've been in a mood since we left Madison."
That got me going again. "I've been in a mood
since you and Elisabeth cheated
! And then when I try to move past it, you keep bringing it up. I told you not to talk to her about it, but you did it anyway. Then you were a bitch later and wouldn't dance with me until I groveled. And if that wasn't bad enough, no one else would dance with me, either, because they were all afraid of you."
"I didn't cheat!" she roared. "You're just mad because my game outfoxed you."
I spun to face her. "Tell me, Lara, when was the last time I played foxy games with you? I let you play your wolf games with me all the time. Do you want to look at everything I do, wondering where the catch is? Those times I play foxy games with you, I make sure you know I'm doing it. But how often do I trick you, just so I can tell everyone I outfoxed you?"
"Iowa," she said coldly.
"And what did you do to me in response?" I asked. I didn't wait for a response. "My last wager with you for anything more important than a back rub should have been the wedding dress. Well, live and learn. It won't happen again."
"It wasn't my wager. I didn't put Elisabeth up to it."
"You didn't stop her or warn me there were other rules. You didn't warn me the special cards were for so many points. You didn't warn me every single one of them was written to poke fun at me. If it weren't for Elisabeth's wager, then stacking the deck to ensure your plane won would have been
funny
. If it weren't for cheating to win a silly game, then losing Elisabeth's wager would have been
funny
. But the combination was cheating, and you both knew it while you were doing it. Is that how you want our relationship to go? Do you want to look over your shoulder every minute of every day, wondering how I'm pulling the wool over your eyes today?"
We glared at each other for a while.
I realized I didn't want to fight with her. I didn't think she wanted to fight with me.