Free Fall (18 page)

As if sensing her train of thought Joseph said softly, "Does this mean we’re over?"

"Do you want us to be over?" she asked.

"No! I know it’s lame to say I’m sorry, but that’s what I am. I’m so sorry. It was a bad lapse in judgment and I immediately regretted it."

"What happened?"

He laughed a little nervously, and Nina’s hand itched to smack him across the mouth. He took a deep breath and began to speak rapidly, "She came up to my room at the hotel and said she wanted to run lines. We got a drink from the mini bar, well, several drinks actually, and I got pretty drunk. Next thing I knew she started kissing me. I was taken by surprise, so I guess I let her kiss me. I don’t why." He stopped.

"And?"

He let out a heavy sigh. "Well, we got things going. I was really drunk, some kind of weird blackout." He shook his head. "We only did it for a very short time, and then I couldn’t go on."

Nina shuddered, "Was that the only time?"

"Yes. She was there the next morning but I didn’t touch her again. And I didn’t want to. When I saw her in my bed I just couldn’t believe that I had actually done that. It was like someone else had taken over my body."

Nina scoffed, skepticism showing clearly on her face. "Okay, Joseph. Listen carefully. You can’t sleep with other women. I can’t handle it. You understand? It hurts. Jesus! I can’t believe I have to give you instructions like this. Are you that stupid? What’s her name? What does she look like?"

"Her name? Why?"

"Because then I'll know who she is if she comes up and starts talking to me like Karen did."

"That won't happen."

"How do I know it won't happen? Let's see," she ticked off her fingers one by one. "There's that pink haired girl at the restaurant, there's Karen in the bathroom at Willie's, and now there's some actress out there that I've never seen before. That's three, and I've only been here a month and a half. How many more, Joseph? How will I know if I'm face to face with someone you've slept with before?"

His face ashen, Joseph got off his knees and sat beside her on the couch. "Nina, sweetheart. There's only you. You must know that. It was a mistake. I'm not even sure how it happened." He draped his arm on the back of the couch and Nina scooted away.

"Her name is Michelle Paige," he said, resignedly. "You can find her online."

Nina gave him a look. "Well? Go get the laptop."

Joseph left her side and returned with the laptop.

Nina powered it up and went to Google. Michelle Paige was shown on IMDb, a petite redhead with large, liquid grey eyes. Nina read her date of birth and felt nauseated. "Really, Joseph? She's twenty five." She banged the laptop lid closed. "Does Karen know her?"

"I don't know. Karen wasn't there."

"She could have gotten this girl to get you drunk and into bed."

"That's entirely possible," Joseph said.

"But, it still doesn’t excuse the fact that you actually did it! I’m going to bed." She couldn't speak to him anymore.

"It’s only eight thirty!"

"I need some time to process this."

She got up abruptly went to the bedroom and locked the door behind her. In the master bathroom was a bottle of Nyquil she had brought with her from Seattle. She unscrewed the cap and took three large gulps of it. Process, hell! Give me sweet oblivion. She returned to the bedroom, went around to her side of the bed and slipped in between the sheets in her shorts and T-shirt. It took fifteen minutes for the night time cold medicine to take effect.

In the morning she struggled out of sleep to feel someone rubbing her shoulder. She opened her eyes and saw that Joseph sat on the bed beside her. He held up a long nail that he'd used to trick the lock on the door. "I had to get in to get dressed. I’m leaving. I have to sign some contracts at Peter’s office." He stroked her cheek. "Are we okay?"

He’s so handsome, she thought faintly, gazing up into his warm brown eyes. Then she remembered. Oh yeah. That’s right. He’s unfaithful and can't be trusted.

To get rid of him she mumbled, "Yes, we’re okay." She wanted to go back to sleep. She could barely keep her eyes open. Her limbs were heavy with that sink-into-the-mattress-and-not-move-a-muscle feeling that was hard to resist. She turned onto her side. Joseph stood over her for a moment longer. She felt his finger nudge her hair off her neck, then she heard him sigh heavily and leave the room.

Later, Nina awoke again and lay in bed a long time. What a strange situation she had gotten herself into. How did this happen? She asked herself. How can I stay here after this? I'll be the girlfriend who's always suspicious of other women. Even if Karen had done this, the miserable truth was that Joseph had cheated on her. Her whole body ached with disenchantment. It wasn’t so much the fact that Joseph, the man she had fallen head over heels in love with, hadn't been able to pass up an opportunity to sleep with that girl. It was the stinging realization that there might not be anyone out there for her now. Who could follow Joseph?

Love is a fairy tale, she thought bitterly. Bolstered by all the hype in books and movies. There's really no such thing. She felt absurd for buying into it. A wave of homesickness washed over her as she thought of her family and friends in Seattle. Her people at the club, the familiar surroundings… her place! Suddenly, she missed her apartment and all her personal belongings. Her bed. Cooking in her kitchen. She thought of the steep Seattle streets, the hustle and bustle of everyone walking downtown, even the wet Seattle weather. I’m going home, she decided. With a heavy heart, she got out of bed and started packing.

Karen was getting a pedicure when her cell phone vibrated. "Louie, baby! What’s the latest word, honey pie?"

"As far as I can tell, she’s left. Gone back to Seattle," Louis said.

"How do you know this?"

"Well, I climbed the fence and snuck around the house last night. It was a close call because I think she might have seen me. I saw her downstairs, she was alone for a while and then he came home." Louis paused and Karen waited as she heard a series of snorts and honks as he blew his nose. "Then, I went back this morning and walked around the block ten freakin' times, got a lot of crazy looks from the neighbors, I tell ya! I mean, what the hell? I could be living there for all they know. What a bunch of snooty assholes!"

"You know, if you would dress a little better you wouldn’t look like a criminal, Louis. You forgot my heel," she commented to the Asian girl who was massaging her foot.

"What’s wrong with the way I dress?" Louis asked petulantly.

"Never mind! How do you know she’s gone?"

"I saw her put suitcases into the back of a car, and leave. So, you got your wish. Everything worked the way you wanted it to," Louis said. "When do I get my payment?"

"When I know for sure she’s gone," Karen said.

"That ain’t fair! I did what you wanted. I've been watching this house for two days now. You didn’t say it depended on whether she actually left or not. Hey, how ‘bout I call old Joseph and tell him how you're setting him up? I’m not sure I like all this screwing around with people, anyway."

"Since when did you develop a conscience, Louis? Okay, I’ll come to your apartment tonight, how’s that? Will that keep your mouth shut?"

"I thought we were gonna rent a hotel?" Louis said.

"Alright, that’s probably a better idea anyway," Karen said, thinking that it would be much cleaner than Louis’ apartment. "Get a room near the airport and text me the address. Seven o’clock."

She tossed her phone into her bag by the chair and got up out of the footbath. "I think I’ll skip the polish today," she told the girl. "I’d probably do a better job of it anyway. That means half price, right?" After the girl dried her feet, she slipped on her flip-flops and laid a twenty on the chair. "I won’t be back, the service here is second rate." She saw the uncomprehending look on the girl’s face and added, "You don’t understand a word I’m saying do you?"

The girl just smiled.

"No, I thought not," Karen said and left the salon.

Back at home she painted her toenails a deep shade of pink and then rehearsed her lines for her first day of taping tomorrow. All her plans were falling into place. That woman was gone. She didn't have to send the photos anonymously. Maybe Joseph told her what happened, but who cared why she left? She would be working with Joseph and it wouldn’t be long before they were together again. How could it get more perfect than that? There would be publicity for the show and the press would be tipped off that she and Joseph were a couple, which would help the ratings.

As for Louis, there was no getting out of it, she was going to have to have sex with him. She couldn’t take the risk of him blabbing to Joseph. And if Joseph found out, then there would be no reconciliation, ever. That woman would come back and Karen, who never liked to lose, would have to eat crow. Based on Louis’ earlier behavior she admitted that she might have underestimated her power over him. He wanted to switch places and have the control, and he was realizing just how much control. She would have sex with him and then educate him on the rules. If he told Joseph what she did, she would turn him into the police, because if she went down, he was going with her.

When Joseph arrived home, he shut the door behind him and knew that she was gone. The house felt empty. The deadbolt wasn’t locked, which meant that she had only turned the lock on the handle when she left. On the counter in the kitchen there was a handwritten note, with, as he expected, a house key sitting on top of it. A ‘Dear John’ letter, he thought sadly as he picked up the paper.

Joseph,

I’ve gone home. I think it’s best that we get some distance between us. I can’t be around you, knowing what I do, and pretend that it’s all okay. It’s possible that we may be able to work it out someday, but the way I feel right now, I don’t think I can forgive you for what you’ve done. To keep my self-respect, I need to go home. I don’t belong here. Please don’t call or try to contact me. Give me some space, and some time to be myself again. I will miss you terribly.

Nina

Joseph leaned his elbows on the counter, put his head in his hands, and groaned out loud. He knew that this distance she talked about was not going to help get her back, the longer they were apart, the better chance that they would never get back together. He would respect her wishes and not contact her for a while. How long? It didn’t occur to him to give up. There was a crushing pressure in his chest, her absence already becoming too heavy a weight to bear. He wanted her back. He straightened up, and with jerky, shaky movements, sat down at the kitchen table. He thought about her words—maybe we can work it out someday—and grasped at this slim hope like a drowning man.

After a little while he shook himself out of his reverie and called the only person he could talk to.

Laura answered on the first ring. "Hey bro! What’s up?"

"Can you come over?" Joseph asked, his voice breaking.

"What’s wrong?" Laura was instantly on alert. "What’s happened?"

"I’m okay, it’s just that…" Joseph took a deep breath, "Nina’s left me."

"Oh, no! Joseph! Shit! Dammit!" she yelled. Then more quietly, "Dude. I’ll be right over."

Thirty minutes later, she was at his kitchen table reading the note Nina had left. "So, what did you do?"

"I slept with someone else," Joseph whispered.

"Joseph!" She picked up a magazine off the table and thwacked him over the head with it. "What the hell?" She smacked him again and Joseph put up his arms to shield himself from the blows as she brought the magazine down with each word, "You. Freaking. Moron. God!" She put the magazine down and sat there, thoroughly pissed off. "I don’t blame her. She’s not one of your little bed buddies you know! You can’t treat people that way!" Laura got up and started pacing the kitchen floor. "Well, what do you want me to do about it? She’s not going to listen to me, there’s nothing I can say to fix this!"

"I don’t want you to do anything about it," Joseph said.

Laura stopped her pacing and looked at the slump of his shoulders. "I’m sorry, bro," she said softly. "I’ll stay here for a couple days, shall I?" She massaged the back of his neck. "I know! Let’s go out and get shitfaced! When’s the last time we did that?" She went to the door off the kitchen, pounded down the stairs and grabbed a bottle of Cuervo from the bar. Coming back up into the kitchen, she said, "Let’s start with this! I’ll call a cab and we can go to that new place, I hear it’s got a blues band." She poured two shots of tequila and handed one to Joseph. "Take your medicine!" Joseph dutifully downed the shot as Laura reached into the fridge and opened a couple of beers. "Now chase it!" She picked up the phone to call for a cab.

The next morning Joseph told Laura to go home because he was so hung over that all he wanted to do was sleep all day. Got drunk again! What is wrong with me lately? Laura had seemed perfectly fine. She rarely felt the after effects of alcohol and right at this moment he hated her for it. How can two people with the same genes be so different in that way? He found some Tylenol PM and dumped three pills into his shaking hand. He popped them in his mouth and turned on the water to gulp down several mouthfuls from the sink. He waited to see if the pills would stay down and then staggered woozily to lie back down on the bed. Funny how people drink to forget. It does help you forget for a little while, but then the memories always come back the next day. Except they are a hundred times more painful when you’ve got a hangover than when you were sober before you started drinking to forget. What a fool! He had to be back at the studio tomorrow and he needed to recuperate quickly so he could be sharp for it. He closed his eyes and chased thoughts of Nina away.