Freud - Complete Works (353 page)

   ‘
Hans
:
"Yes."

   ‘
I
:
"What?"

   ‘
Hans
:
"I’ve forgotten."

   ‘
I
: "Perhaps
they told you about their widdlers?"

   ‘
Hans
: "Oh,
no."

   ‘
I
; "Were you
frightened of horses already then?"

   ‘
Hans
: "Oh, no.
I wasn’t frightened at all."

   ‘
I
: "Perhaps
Berta told you that horses ---?"

   ‘
Hans
(interrupting): "---widdle? No."

  
¹
See below. His father was quite right in
suspecting that Fritzl fell down.

  
²
[‘
Wegen dem Pferd
’.] I
may explain that Hans was not maintaining that he had got the
nonsense
at that time
but
in that connection
. Indeed,
it must have been so, for theoretical considerations require that
what is to-day the object of a phobia must at one time in the past
have been the source of a high degree of pleasure. I may at the
same time complete what the child was unable to express, and add
that the little word ‘
wegen
’ [‘because
of’, ‘ 'cos of’] was the means of enabling
the phobia to extend from horses on to ‘
Wagen
’
[‘vehicles’] or, as Hans was accustomed to pronounce
the word and hear it pronounced, ‘
Wägen
’
[pronounced exactly like ‘
wegen
’]. It must never
be forgotten how much more concretely children treat words than
grown-up people do, and consequently how much more significant for
them are similarities of sound in words.

Analysis Of A Phobia In A Five-Year-Old Boy

2048

   ‘On April 10th I took up
our conversation of the day before, and tried to discover what his
"'cos of the horse" meant. Hans could not remember;
he only knew that some children had stood outside the front door
one morning and had said, "'cos of the horse, 'cos of
the horse!" He had been there himself. When I pressed him more
closely, he declared that they had not said "'cos of the
horse" at all, but that he had remembered wrong.

   ‘
I
: "But you
and the others were often in the stables. You must surely have
talked about horses there." - "We didn’t." -
"What did you talk about?" - "Nothing." -
"Such a lot of children, and nothing to talk about?" -
"We did talk about something, but not about horses." -
"Well, what was it?" - "I don’t remember any
more."

   ‘I allowed the matter to
drop, as the resistances were evidently too great,¹ and went
on to the following question: "Did you like playing with
Berta?"

   ‘
He
: "Yes, very
much; but not with Olga. D’you know what Olga did? I was
given a paper ball once by Grete up there at Gmunden, and Olga tore
it all to pieces. Berta would never have torn my ball. I liked
playing with Berta very much."

   ‘
I
: "Did you
see what Berta’s widdler looked like?"

   ‘
He
: "No, but I
saw the horses’; because I was always in the stables, and so
I saw the horses’ widdlers."

   ‘
I
: "And so you
were curious and wanted to know what Berta’s and
Mummy’s widdlers looked like?"

   ‘
He
:
"Yes."

   ‘I reminded him of how he
had once complained to me that the little girls always wanted to
look on while he was widdling.

  
¹
In point of fact there was nothing more to
be got out of it than Hans’s verbal association, and this had
escaped his father. Here is a good instance of conditions under
which an analyst’s efforts are wasted.

Analysis Of A Phobia In A Five-Year-Old Boy

2049

   ‘
He
: "Berta
always looked on at me too" (he spoke with great satisfaction
and not at all resentfully); "often she did, I used to widdle
in the little garden where the radishes were, and she stood outside
the front door and looked on at me."

   ‘
I
: "And when
she widdled, did you look on?"

   ‘
He
: "She used
to go to the W.C."

   ‘
I
: "And you
were curious?"

   ‘
He
: "I was
inside the W.C. when she was in it."

   ‘(This was a fact. The
servants told us about it once, and I recollect that we forbade
Hans to do it.)

   ‘
I
: "Did you
tell her you wanted to go in?"

   ‘
He
: "I went in
alone and because Berta let me. There’s nothing shameful in
that."

   ‘
I
: "And
you’d have liked to see her widdler?"

   ‘
He
: "Yes, but
I didn’t see it."

   ‘I then reminded him of the
dream about playing forfeits that he had had at Gmunden, and said:
"When you were at Gmunden did you want Berta to make you
widdle?"

   ‘
He
: "I never
said so to her."

   ‘
I
: "Why
didn’t you ever say so to her?"

   ‘
He
: "Because I
didn’t think of it." (Interrupting himself) "If I
write everything to the Professor, my nonsense’ll soon be
over, won’t it?"

   ‘
I
: "Why did
you want Berta to make you widdle?"

   ‘
He
: "I
don’t know. Because she looked on at me."

   ‘
I
: "Did you
think to yourself she should put her hand to your
widdler?"

   ‘
He
:
"Yes." (Changing the subject)("It was such fun at
Gmunden. In the little garden where the radishes were there was a
little sand-heap; I used to play there with my spade."

   ‘(This was the garden where
he used always to widdle.)

   "
I
: ‘Did you
put your hand to your widdler at Gmunden, when you were in
bed?"

Analysis Of A Phobia In A Five-Year-Old Boy

2050

   ‘
He
: "No. Not
then; I slept so well at Gmunden that I never thought of it at all.
The only times I did it was at --- Street¹ and now."

   ‘
I
: "But Berta
never put her hand to your widdler?"

   ‘
He
: "She never
did, no; because I never told her to."

   ‘
I
: "Well, and
when was it you wanted her to?"

   ‘
He
: "Oh, at
Gmunden once."

   ‘
I
: "Only
once?"

   ‘
He
: "Well, now
and then."

   ‘
I
: "She used
always to look on at you when you widdled; perhaps she was curious
to know how you did it?"

   ‘
He
: "Perhaps
she was curious to know what my widdler looked like."

   ‘
I
: "But you
were curious too. Only about Berta?"

   ‘
He
: "About
Berta, and about Olga."

   ‘
I
: "About who
else?"

   ‘
He
: "About no
one else."

   ‘
I
: "You know
that’s not true. About Mummy too."

   ‘
He
: "Oh, yes,
about Mummy."

   ‘
I
: "But now
you’re not curious any more. You know what Hanna’s
widdler looks like, don’t you?"

   ‘
He
:
"It’ll grow, though, won’t it?"²

   ‘
I
: "Yes, of
course. But when it’s grown it won’t look like
yours."

   ‘
He
: "I know
that. It’ll be the same" (
sc.
as it now is)
"only bigger."

   ‘
I
: "When we
were at Gmunden, were you curious when your Mummy
undressed?"

   ‘
He
: "Yes. And
then when Hanna was in her bath I saw her widdler."

   ‘
I
: "And
Mummy’s too?"

   ‘
He
:
"No."

   ‘
I
: "You were
disgusted when you saw Mummy’s drawers?"

  
¹
The flat they were in before the
move.

  
²
Hans wants to be assured that his own
widdler will grow.

Analysis Of A Phobia In A Five-Year-Old Boy

2051

   ‘
He
: "Only when
I saw the black ones - when she bought them - then I spat. But I
don’t spit when she puts her drawers on or takes them off.
I spit because the black drawers are like a lumf and the yellow
ones like a widdle, and then I think I’ve got to widdle
.
When Mummy has her drawers on I don’t see them; she’s
got her clothes on over them."

   ‘
I
: "And when
she takes off her clothes?"

   ‘
He
: "I
don’t spit then either. But when her drawers are new they
look like a lumf. When they’re old, the colour goes away and
they get dirty. When you buy them they’re quite clean, but at
home they’ve been made dirty. When they’re bought
they’re new, and when they’re not bought they’re
old."

   ‘
I
: "Then you
aren’t disgusted by old ones?"

   ‘
He
: "When
they’re old they’re much blacker than a lumf,
aren’t they? They’re just a bit
blacker."¹

   ‘
I
: "Have you
often been into the W.C. with Mummy?"

   ‘
He
: "Very
often."

   ‘
I
: "And were
you disgusted?"

   ‘
He
:
"Yes. . . . No."

   ‘
I
: "You like
being there when Mummy widdles or does lumf?"

   ‘
He
: "Yes, very
much."

   ‘
I
: "Why do you
like it so much?"

   ‘
He
: "I
don’t know."

   ‘
I
: "Because
you think you’ll see her widdler."

   ‘
He
: "Yes, I do
think that."

   ‘
I
: "But why
won’t you ever go into the W.C. at Lainz?"

   ‘(At Lainz he always begs
me not to take him into the W.C.; he was frightened once by the
noise of the flush.)

  
¹
Our young man was here wrestling with a
subject of which he was not equal to giving a clear exposition; so
that there is some difficulty in understanding him. He may perhaps
have meant that the drawers only recalled his feelings of disgust
when he saw them on their own account; as soon as his mother had
them on, he ceased to connect them with lumf or widdle, and they
then interested him in a different way.

Analysis Of A Phobia In A Five-Year-Old Boy

2052

   ‘
He
: "Perhaps
it’s because it makes a row when you pull the plug."

   ‘
I
: "And then
you’re afraid."

   ‘
He
:
"Yes."

   ‘
I
: "And what
about our W.C. here?"

   ‘
He
: "Here
I’m not. At Lainz it gives me a fright when you pull the
plug. And when I’m inside and the water rushes down, then it
gives me a fright too."

   ‘And, "just to show me
that he wasn’t frightened in our flat," he made me go
into the W.C. and set the flush in motion. He then explained to
me:

   ‘"First there’s
a loud row, and then a loose one." (This is when the water
comes down.) "When there’s a loud row I’d rather
stay inside, and when there’s a soft one I’d rather go
out."

   ‘
I
: "Because
you’re afraid?"

   ‘
He
: "Because
if there’s a loud row I always so much like to see it" -
(correcting himself) "to hear it; so I’d rather stay
inside and hear it properly."

   ‘
I
: "What does
a loud row remind you of?"

   ‘
He
: "That
I’ve got to do lumf in the W.C." (The same thing, that
is, that the black drawers reminded him of.)

   ‘
I
:
"Why?"

   ‘
He
: "I
don’t know. A loud row sounds as though you were doing lumf.
A big row reminds me of lumf, and a little one of widdle."
(Cf. the black and the yellow drawers.)

   ‘
I
: "I say,
wasn’t the bus-horse the same colour as a lumf"
(According to his account it had been black.)

   ‘
He
(very much
struck): "Yes."'

   At this point I must put in a few
words. Hans’s father was asking too many questions, and was
pressing the inquiry along his own lines instead of allowing the
little boy to express his thoughts. For this reason the analysis
began to be obscure and uncertain. Hans went his own way and would
produce nothing if attempts were made to draw him off it. For the
moment his interest was evidently centred upon lumf and widdle, but
we cannot tell why. Just as little satisfactory light was thrown
upon the business of the row as upon that of the yellow and black
drawers. I suspect that the boy’s sharp ears had clearly
detected the difference between the sounds made by a man
micturating and a woman. The analysis succeeded in forcing the
material somewhat artificially into an expression of the
distinction between the two different calls of nature. I can only
advise those of my readers who have not as yet themselves conducted
an analysis not to try to understand everything at once, but to
give a kind of unbiased attention to every point that arises and to
await further developments.

Analysis Of A Phobia In A Five-Year-Old Boy

2053

   ‘April 11th. This morning
Hans came into our room again and was sent away, as he always has
been for the last few days.

   ‘Later on, he began:
"Daddy, I thought something:
I was in the bath,
¹
and the plumber came and unscrewed it.
²
Then he took
a bigger borer and stuck it into my stomach
."