Frostfire (15 page)

“She’s lying,” Ridley said as he clapped halfheartedly for her. “She doesn’t love
him.”

“Why do you say that?” Ember asked.

He shook his head and went back to spooning the now-freezing-cold stew. “Nobody loves
anybody that much.”

“And here you were going on and on about true love last night,” I said, surprised
by the bitter edge of my own words.

“Was I?” He lifted his head, resting his eye on me, and I quickly turned back toward
my own stew. “I remember saying something about settling down, but nothing about true
love.”

“Same thing,” I mumbled.

“I don’t know. Some people love each other that much,” Ember insisted. “I think the
Trylle King and Queen are super into each other.”

“I’m not saying that people don’t fall in love. People fall madly in love with each
other all the time. But that right there”—Ridley gestured behind him, toward where
King Evert and Queen Mina were seated—“that was all an act.”

“I think you’re right,” Tilda agreed, talking about the royalty in a way that was
unusual for her. When I looked at her in surprise, she shrugged one shoulder simply
and took a sip of her water. “Well, he is right. She was a small-town girl with big
dreams, and marrying into money and royalty was her way to get what she wanted.”

“That’s all I’m saying.” Ridley leaned back in his seat, a self-satisfied grin on
his face. Since Tilda so rarely chimed in on matters like this, having her on his
side seemed like a boon.

“Good for her, then,” I replied glibly.

“Good for her?” Ember laughed. “You think it’s good that she tricked the King?”

“She didn’t trick him,” I corrected her. “He needed a beautiful wife to bear him children,
and that’s what he got. Well, no kids yet, but she’s still young. She wanted to make
a better life for herself, and she found a way. Maybe not the way that you or I would’ve
chosen, but it was one way to do it.”

“Would you do that?” Ridley asked. “Would you marry someone you didn’t love to advance
your life or your career?”

“No, of course I wouldn’t,” I said.

“Would you even marry someone if you did love them?” he asked. I could feel his eyes
on me, but I refused to look at him, preferring to finish my wine in big gulps.

Before I could answer, Evert announced that it was time for the dance, and waiters
came out to start clearing the tables and moving them out of the way so there would
be more room for people to dance.

Then I didn’t have time to worry about Ridley’s questions or the way his eyes seemed
to look straight through me. I had to hurry and help the waiters take our plates away,
and then I was on my feet with the other trackers, helping to stack chairs and push
tables to the side of the room.

But that was just as well, because I had no idea how I would answer.

THIRTEEN

impropriety

At the end of the ballroom, a small orchestra played a mix of contemporary human music
along with Kanin folk songs. A singer accompanied them, and she had a pristine voice
with an operatic range. The songs would segue seamlessly from the Beatles to a Kanin
love ballad, sung entirely in its original low Swedish, and then would switch to a
beautiful rendition of Adele.

It was still early in the evening, so the dance floor was relatively full. Most couples
swayed to the music, but some glided across the floor with the elegant, practiced
steps that came from years of training. The royalty, especially those from Doldastam,
lived pampered, sheltered lives with much free time on their hands, so many of them
took up ballroom dancing to fill the time.

As the newest returning changeling and one of the highest-ranking Markis, Linus attracted
a lot of attention, and his dance card was full. While he could be clumsy, and did
trip over his own feet a few times, his dance partners didn’t seem to mind.

I watched him from the sidelines, ready to swoop in if he needed me, but he seemed
to be doing okay on his own. His dance moves might have been lacking, but he made
up for it by being nice and rather charming, in an unassuming kind of way.

Tilda and Ember didn’t have any charges to watch out for, so they were free to hang
out with me, standing along the wall at the edge of the dance floor. Tilda wore a
short flapper-esque dress that showed off her long legs, and as she swayed, the silver
tassels would swing and bounce along with her. Even though we were supposed to be
standing at attention at the side of the ballroom, Tilda couldn’t help herself. She
loved to dance far too much. With her eyes closed, her head tilted back slightly,
letting her long brown hair flow behind her, she moved gracefully in time with the
music.

“I wish I could dance,” Ember lamented.

Tilda opened her eyes and glanced down at Ember. “Just dance. It’s fun even if you’re
alone.”

Ember stared forlornly out at the crowded dance floor. “When I was a kid, all I wanted
to do was go to the palace and attend one of these balls. And now that I am, I’m stuck
at the side, unable to join in or have fun.”

“You’ve joined in. You got to have a nice meal, you got all dolled up, and you’re
listening to the music,” I pointed out, trying cheer her up. “You’re a part of it.”

“Maybe,” Ember said doubtfully, but then she shook her head. “No, you’re right. I
guess I just spent too much time daydreaming about dancing with Prince Charming. Or
Princess Charming, as it were.”

As the song ended, Linus politely extracted himself from the arms of a lovely but
clingy Marksinna in her early teens, and he came over to where I was standing with
Ember and Tilda. His cheeks were flushed, but he had a goofy, lopsided grin plastered
on his face.

“How are you doing?” I asked Linus as he reached us.

“Good. I mean, I think I am.” He ran a hand through his dark hair and his smile turned
sheepish. “Did I seem to be making any mistakes?”

“No, you look like you’re doing really good,” I assured him. “Are you having a nice
time?”

“Yeah. It’s a little weird dancing with so many strangers, especially when I’ve never
been that into dancing, but most of the people are nice.” He glanced back toward where
his parents were seated at a table. “And my parents seem really proud.”

“They are,” I said.

Linus turned back to me, his eyes twinkling. “Are you having fun? You look kinda left
out here on the sidelines.”

“I’m having fun.” I smiled to prove it to him.

“Why don’t you come dance with me?” Linus suggested. “Cut loose for a minute.”

“Thank you for asking, but I don’t think I should.” I demurred as graciously as I
could. “It wouldn’t be proper.”

“Not even for one song?” His eyebrows lifted as he stared down hopefully at me, making
him appear more like an excited puppy than a teenage boy.

I shook my head ruefully. “I’m afraid not.”

“I’ll dance with you,” Ember piped in and stepped closer to him.

“
Ember
,” I admonished her, but Linus had already extended his arm to her.

She waved me off as she looped her arm through his. “It’s one song. It’ll be fine.”

“That’s the spirit.” Linus grinned and led her out to the dance floor.

I looked to Tilda for support, hoping she would back me up even though Ember had already
disappeared into the crowd and it’d be too late to stop her. But Tilda just shrugged,
still swaying her hips along to the music.

“Let them have their fun,” she said, smiling as she watched them twirl clumsily away
from us.

“Ember is such a rebel sometimes.” I stood on my tiptoes, craning my neck in an attempt
to keep my eyes on Linus and Ember as they weaved in between other couples.

“They’re fine,” Ridley said. I’d been so busy watching Linus and Ember that I hadn’t
noticed Ridley come up beside me. “I doubt anyone will even notice her dancing. Everyone’s
having fun, and most of the royals are getting drunk on wine.”

“Linus actually asked Bryn to dance first, but she declined,” Tilda told him, ratting
on me even though I knew I’d done the right thing.

She had a mischievous glint in her eyes—parties like this always brought it out in
her. While she hadn’t had anything to drink tonight, Tilda seemed to get drunk on
good music and good dancing. Her relaxed elegance made me feel so rigid in comparison.

“You probably should’ve said yes. He could actually use a lesson in dance moves.”
Ridley motioned to where Linus stumbled over Ember’s foot, but she helped him keep
his balance.

“In private I’ll give him a few pointers,” I said. “But it wouldn’t be proper here.
He’s my charge. I shouldn’t do anything that might blur the lines of professionalism.”

“I love it when you talk clean to me, quoting training manuals like sonnets,” Ridley
teased, but I found his usual flirtation off-putting since I didn’t know how to respond.

Seeing him with Juni last night forced me to realize that I had some type of feelings
for him. That left me unsure of how to act around him, so I’d rather be around him
as little as I possibly could. At least until the feelings went away. And they had
to eventually, right?

“There’s nothing wrong with being professional,” I told him coolly with eyes straight
ahead, staring at the dance floor.

“There’s nothing wrong with dancing either.” Ridley moved so he was standing in front
of me, forcing me to look at him. “Come on. Why don’t you dance with me?”

“We’re working,” I replied quickly, making him smirk.

“It’s a party, and everyone’s dancing. And as the Rektor, I am your boss.” He held
out his hand to me.

“So this is an order?” I asked, eyeing his outstretched hand and hating how tempted
I was to take it.

“If I say no, will you still dance with me?” he asked.

Tilda elbowed me gently in the side. “Just go dance, Bryn.”

Without thinking, I reached out and took his hand. His hand easily enveloped mine,
and it sent flutters through my stomach, which I tried to suppress. His smile widened,
and as he led me away, I glanced back over my shoulder at Tilda, who smiled reassuringly
at me.

Once we’d lost ourselves in the sea of well-dressed trolls, Ridley stopped and I put
my hand on his shoulder. I was careful to keep some distance between us, but when
he put his hand on the small of my back, he pulled me closer to him.

“This isn’t so bad, right? Nobody’s gawking at us or chasing us with pitchforks,”
Ridley said, smiling down at me as we danced in time with a dramatic cover of “Love
Is Blindness.”

“Not yet, anyway,” I admitted.

I glanced around just to be sure we weren’t getting any dirty looks, but nobody really
seemed to be paying us any mind. But I supposed that, based on the formal way both
Ridley and I were dressed, and the fact that there were so many royals here from other
kingdoms who didn’t know each other, they didn’t realize that we didn’t belong here,
dancing alongside them.

Ember spotted us through a break in the crowd, and her jaw dropped. Instinctively,
I tried to pull away from Ridley, but his hand was unyielding and warm on my back,
holding me to him.

“So what’s going on with you?” Ridley asked, and when I looked up, his smile had fallen
away and his dark eyes were strangely serious.

“Nothing’s going on.” I tried to brush him off with an uneasy smile.

“I feel like you’re mad at me.”

I hedged my answer and lowered my eyes. “Why would I be mad?”

“I don’t know. But you’ve been giving me the cold shoulder all night.” He paused.
“You’ve barely even looked at me.”

“It’s not like I spend all my time staring at you,” I said, finding it hard to look
up at him even now.

“Bryn. You know what I mean,” he insisted firmly, and I did.

I hadn’t meant to put a wall between us, but I really didn’t know how else to deal
with things. He was apparently with Juni now, and even if he wasn’t, he was still
my boss, and a tracker getting romantically involved with a Rektor was definitely
a bad move, one that could cost us both our jobs. It opened up too many possibilities
for corruption, manipulation, and nepotism.

So there was no way Ridley and I could ever be together, even if he wanted to. Or
even if
I
wanted to, and I didn’t. Not really.

I finally willed myself to look at him, meeting his mahogany eyes, even though it
made me flush with heat when I did. “I’m not mad at you. I promise.”

“If I did something to upset you, you can tell me,” he said in a low voice, distressed
at the thought that he’d done something to hurt me. “That’s, like, the foundation
of our friendship. We’re always honest with each other.”

“I am,” I lied as convincingly as I could.

“Good,” Ridley said, not because he believed me, but because he didn’t know how else
to push me.

“Is this why you asked me to dance?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood. “So you
could interrogate me?”

“No. I asked you to dance because I wanted to dance with you,” he said simply. “You’re
a good dancer.”

With that, he extended his arm and I stepped back away from him. Then he pulled me
close, twirling me as he did, and I stopped with my back pressed against his chest.
His arms were wrapped around me, and his breath felt warm on my neck.

We stayed that way for only a second, our hips swaying slightly, and my heart pounded
so loudly I was terrified he could feel it, but I didn’t want to pull away from him.
I actually wanted to stay that way forever, with the orchestra swelling, and the singer
reaching her crescendo as she warned about the blindness of love. Under the dim candlelight
of a chandelier in a crowded ballroom, with Ridley’s arms strong as they crossed over
me, my body bound to his, I closed my eyes, wishing the moment would last forever.

But it was only a split second, and then he had my hand, and he spun me around again.
This time, when he pulled me back into his arms, I extended my leg, the way the dance
required. He dipped me down so low, my hair brushed against the floor, and my eyes
stayed locked on his as he pulled me back up.