Fully Engaged (10 page)

He swept the comforter to the floor until they were left with only each other and a tangle of legs in a floral sheet. His legs stretched the length in running shorts, scars crisscrossing over around his ankles, running thick and corded up his right leg, thinner with more precision on his left knee.

All red and angry.

But that would fade with time, she reminded herself. She knew too well from experience. “You’ve had a rough year.”

His mouth tipped in a wry smile. “You could say that.”

“You’re even stronger than I realized when I saw you in the bar.”

“You have a way with words, lady. I’m not sure I agree, but thanks for saying so.”

“I have a way with the truth.” She rested her hands on his thighs, running her thumbs down steely muscles.

He rested his hands on top of hers. “You’ve done enough for me tonight. Now tell me what you want.”

What did she want? Total dark would be nice, to settle the nerves buzzing around like untrained newbie pilots in her stomach, but that was the coward’s way out. She needed to dive in. “Who’s going to be on top?”

“Is that an Abbot and Costello question?” Sliding his hands from hers, Rick lounged back against the headboard. He grinned that craggy smile that blew cobwebs out of corners with its sheer power.

“I’ve never met anyone besides you who brought humor into the bedroom.”

Not that she had that much experience beyond him, but sex with her husband had been such a serious business. And her mind was rambling away from her again to avoid the present.

Rick unfolded his hands from behind his head and gripped her waist, hefting her up. “How about we’re both on top?”

He settled her on his lap so she knelt.

“Comfy?” he asked.

“Perfect.” She adjusted her legs and leaned against him, chest to chest, the core of her nestling against his erection with tantalizing friction even through their clothing.

Gripping the hem of his brown T-shirt, she inched the worn fabric up and over his honed chest, a very familiar chest. This part of him she remembered well. She whipped the fabric over his head and flung it across the room.

Nola flattened her palms to the broad expanse of muscles. A sigh puffed from her mouth. His pecs twitched in response.

Her fingers fisted. “Okay, so now it’s the
show mine
time. Right?”

He leaned forward, pressing his mouth to hers. “Shh. Remember? There’s no timetable here.” He nipped her mouth. “No rush.” Kissed her again. “We can keep doing this.” Deepened the contact, tongues touching. “For as long as you want.”

His fingers tangled in her hair, he kissed her with a leisure she remembered from dating days, courting. Hmm.

“You can’t really mean we could just make out all night.”

“If that’s what you want.” His mouth continued to work over her skin while his hands explored.

“But I want more.”

“So do I. I want all of you.” He eased back to look at her again. “But if you’re not ready, then it’s not equal and I’m all about equality here.”

She rested her forehead against his. “What if I said I wanted to leave my tank top on?”

His exhale swirled between them and she wondered what she would do if he gave her an ultimatum. Except she also wondered how she would feel if he seemed grateful for the out. Oh my, there went those silver chains of emotion tangling up in her stomach again.

He slipped his hands just under the hem of her tank top, stroking along her midriff. “I realize we haven’t known each other long enough for you to have any reason to give me that level of trust, but I would be lying if I said I wouldn’t be disappointed if you backed out on letting us come together, totally bare.”

Her breath hitched, she started to talk, but he pressed his mouth to hers to silence her.

“However, I’ll be more disappointed if we don’t do this at all. So bottom line, I’ll take you any way that I can have you.”

Oh. Wow. His turning over of control to her helped in a way she hadn’t expected. His understanding turned the tide for her. She nodded. “Okay, let’s do this.”

Slowly, oh so slowly, he tunneled his hands up the back of her shirt. She’d been prepared for him to go straight for the gusto; she relaxed a little more. The rasp of his callused fingers against her skin caught her by surprise. She sagged against his chest in a warm wash of… “Yum.”

His chuckle rumbled against her chest. “I don’t think my best efforts at seduction have ever been summarized in the same way as a good dinner.”

“A compliment is a compliment. I like my food.” She writhed against him to increase the friction of his hand against her flesh, a sweet pleasure so long missed. “This isn’t a time to overanalyze.”

Why think ahead? Enjoy the moment and let the rest take care of itself. She surrendered to his kiss and stroke, and yes, maybe she’d given over control but she deserved this, and doggone it, her hands were having a hell of an awesome time exploring his body, as well.

And as far as yummy meals went, her mouth enjoyed feasting on his mouth, his neck, his perspiration-dotted skin. So perhaps he’d given over to the moment, as well.

“Shirt on or off?” he asked

“Off,” she said without hesitation. If she didn’t do this now, she never would.

He didn’t take his time or give her even a second to think—thank heavens. Her shirt sailed across the room to hook on a lamp in a heartbeat.

She knew what she looked like now. She’d stared at her altered chest in the mirror often enough.

And she so didn’t want to think right now.

He gazed at her for a moment that seemed to stretch forever but probably was all of five seconds. She wondered if he would make some big ceremonial deal out of touching her scars which would make her cry and she so didn’t want to cry.

He cupped her face in his hands and kissed her, bringing her chest flush with his and holy cow, he was still aroused. Relief beyond anything she ever could have imagined flooded her, followed by joy.

And desire. Sweet, wonderful, unrestrained pleasure.

She wriggled closer against him until she could feel the gentle abrasion of his chest hair against her skin. The sensation caught her by surprise. She’d been so caught up in thinking about the feelings she would lose, she hadn’t thought of what she
would
enjoy. And the way he’d positioned them, she didn’t feel so exposed. How ironic, how delightfully wonderful to find such surprising empathy from a guy with a call sign “Lurch.”

He hadn’t made this about cancer or scars, but about enjoying the moment. Perfect.

Then she stopped thinking at all.

She inhaled the scent of Rick’s spicy aftershave permeating the room. No more of her potpourri taking over the room. This was a man’s place now, regardless of how many floral sheets or froufrou comforters she brought into the place. The sheer masculinity of it sent a rush through her.

Rick dipped his head to trail nibbles along her ear with rambling whispers of how much he wanted her, needed her, his heated words as much an aphrodisiac as his touch skimming away her shorts and underwear.

All righty. Getting down to business.
Yes
. Her heart rate raced and her greedy hands grappled for his shorts, his hips lifting to accommodate, then—oh my—her hand wrapped around the heat of him. Something else so very familiar in this moment.

She remembered well the size and weight of him in her hand, in her. She remembered too his growl of appreciation in her ear, the sense that she knew instinctively what to do for him just as he knew how to bring her such sweet pleasure.

“Nola…”

A groan or a question?

“Yes?”

“Condom.”

“Oh.” She couldn’t string together more than one word at a time, either, which posed a serious problem for finding birth control anytime soon. They didn’t have to worry about conceiving, but in this day and age, condoms were always wise with all the diseases out there.

Think.

“Wallet,” he continued in between working serious magic on a newly discovered erogenous zone at the base of her neck. “Table.”

“Ah. Right.” Now she saw it resting by the lamp and thank goodness he’d thought ahead because, heaven help her, she surely hadn’t.

Leaning, Nola reached, so grateful he stayed with her during the whole stretch of foreplay, never breaking the amazingly shivery contact. Her hand slapped to rest over his wallet, grappled until she fished out the thin packet.

Straightening again, she ripped open the birth control and sheathed him in a smooth sweep that sent his arm twitching around her, muscles taut.

“More?” she teased.

He slid two fingers home inside her. “More.”

Much more.

He teased her again and again with a familiarity he couldn’t possibly have remembered from before yet somehow he seemed to know just what she enjoyed most. When she thought she couldn’t take any more without finishing here, now, he slid both hands to her back, down to cup her bottom and grip. A slight shift and lift upward brought her mouth to his again for a deeper kiss, more kissing while they continued. More intimacy. Her heart raced faster along with her breath threatening a hint of hyperventilation, because with the joining of their mouths, she adjusted her body to accept…

Yes…

His body moved into her hers again with a familiarity that washed away the awkwardness and yes, the fears, too.

A second healing pulsed through her veins, throughout her entire body, her mind, her soul. A cure beyond what could be found from any doctor or medicine.

Her fingers dug into his shoulders, gripped deeper into memorable muscles to anchor her in the moment.

“Okay?”

“Totally. You?”

He throbbed inside her.

She grinned against his mouth, tickled to her toes again that two such chatty people could be reduced to one-word responses by the power of their response to each other. Nola leaned in for another kiss, rocking her hips as he thrust up. This would be okay, fun and normal and wonderful. She could have this part of her world and body back.

More sensations tingled to life again along every inch of skin. Shivery and alive and building as they rocked in synch. Bedsprings squeaked in harmony with their movements, echoing the growing riot within her. She dipped her head to taste his skin, beads of sweat popping along his collarbone, her fingers finding the pebbled hardness of his nipples.

He throbbed inside her again, his growl rumbling against her oversensitized chest. Power trilled through, knowing that she brought him as much pleasure as he gave her.

She opened her mouth to give him another of those one-word encouragements only to find even that much speech had dried up in the fire of her response. She could only throw back her head and savor, hold, shake. Surely it was only because she’d gone so long without.

A little voice in her head told her otherwise.

But then she told that little voice to hush up. She was busy right now enjoying the most amazing, freeing sex of her life, soon to be the most awesome completion. Building now and she didn’t want to risk dulling the edge from the finish. Or worse yet, lose her focus and lose the moment…

“Shh…” His voice and hands soothed over her skin as his body thrust. “I’m with you and I’m not finishing without you, like the two of us taking the leap together. Have you ever done a tandem parachute jump? It’s freaking amazing.”

She liked the image of their bodies locked like a joined freefall jump from an airplane. What a lovely vision of their two worlds mingling. He’d found words when she needed them, when she needed him. She believed him, trusted him.

And…oh…her body convulsed so completely around his, her arms locking him so tightly to her, she couldn’t draw him any deeper as she soared into the sensation.

So amazing. Beautiful. World rocking.

She’d deluded herself once before that she could have a weekend only with this man. Collapsing against his chest, she knew this time she wouldn’t be leaving him a note in the morning.

And even as she fought to catch her breath from the wonderful pleasure he’d helped her find again, she knew that untangling her mess of emotions for this complex man scared her far more than any combat mission.

Chapter 9

B
reeze whipping off the marshy water and over him, Rick twisted the screwdriver on Nola’s mailbox, removing the last of the hinges holding the door. He might not have the answer yet for stopping the letter-writing, car-bombing, finance-sabotaging scum. But Rick intended to make damn sure there wouldn’t be any lethal surprises hidden in the U.S. mailbox, like a poisonous snake or spider, not to mention another bomb.

He’d been working his way through the list of possible dangerous surprises and general handyman fix-its. Aside from wanting to help her, it felt damn good to be out in the world again. Never again would he gripe about mowing the lawn or changing out the heater-AC filters. Nothing like a year in a rehab center to cure a man of grousing about chores around the house.

If only his body would cooperate with the length of his list. He rested his elbows on the mailbox to ease the pressure on his legs. The night of vigorous sex had tapped his reserves, too.

He grinned. Well worth every aching muscle.

So since he was done with the mailbox, why was he hanging out here rather than heading back inside with her? Giving Nola space.

She’d trusted him with a mammoth revelation, and now she was scared. He’d faced fear—in others, and hell yeah, in himself—enough times in the field to recognize it in a heartbeat. Best thing to do? Watch her and take his cue from her. Protecting her had taken on a lot more dimensions than he’d expected.

A shapely shadow stretched over him, reminding him of his primary purpose for being here—and it wasn’t about being in Nola’s bed, much as he enjoyed the pleasurable position.

He needed to remember how easily this woman could distract him from watching the cars driving by, sparse though the traffic might be on the back road, especially on a holiday. All the same, a large blue truck approached, slowing.

Rick knelt down to pull the hammer from the box and leaned against the mailbox as the truck neared to reveal…her neighbor, the ex-cop, Malcolm Cuvier. The truck pulled over onto the side of the road across the street, crunching downed branches.

The burly man hopped out of the truck cab. “Happy Thanksgiving.”

“Same to you. What can we do for you?” Had he really just said
we
in a territorial claim staking of his woman?

Hell yeah.

“Just doing a drive-by to make sure all’s well with Nola and that you aren’t having any more trouble from that bastard who’s been bugging her lately.”

Rick assessed the older man through narrowed eyes and wondered what if… They surely wouldn’t get any support on that theory from the local police since Cuvier was part of the blue wall. This would be better mentioned to someone in the OSI. “All’s been quiet, other than some snafus with stolen credit cards. Child’s play to straighten out.”

That would rile him into action if he was the perp, hopefully anger him enough to make a careless mistake.

“Well, if there’s anything I can do, just let me know.” He backed toward his truck. “And tell Nola happy holidays for me.”

“You bet.” Rick dropped the hammer into the toolbox with a thud as the man drove away.

And speaking of Nola…

She strolled his way down the stone walk, watching him through wary morning-after eyes. Her arms crossed over her chest reminded him of the main reason he needed to get his head out of his ass and scrounge up some “sensitive guy” stuff to reassure her.

“Morning, gorgeous.” Not too original, but pretty decent in a pinch.

And totally true.

With her blond leggy beauty, she stretched those jeans and the simple green sweater out in all the right places. She continued her sashay down the stone walkway, towering oak trees casting a bower of branches and Spanish moss over her. With an extra kick of sass, she batted away the tire swing swishing in the wind. Rigged to lie flat, the tire swing swirled like a chocolate doughnut.

He certainly did plan to have a Thanksgiving feast of
her
later on.

“What are you doing out here when you should be propping up your legs?” she inquired with gentle censure. “You’ve already fixed everything that’s broken and a number of things that weren’t.”

“Nothing major.”

He dropped the screwdriver into the small toolbox he’d found in her garage. He hadn’t found an elaborate workshop, but she had the basics. Rick mentally made a list of a couple more items he could pick up and teach her to use…for after he left? “Just tying up some loose ends to rig better security for your place.”

“I spent a fortune on my security system after those letters started showing up.” She threaded her fingers through her damp curls, looking left and right down the deserted road. “The cops are doing drive-bys. What else could you possibly have in mind?”

He patted the open mailbox. “A few simple techniques I learned in Terrorist Combat 101. And making use of more manpower.”

“Manpower?”

“Have you gotten to know your neighbors?” If they could be called that, all a mile or so down the road in sparsely populated subdivisions.

“Um. I’m really never here and they all live pretty far away.”

“I’m not pitching stones. My house is every bit as glass as yours is, lady. I figured it was worth my while to check out the locals in case you had some creepy lech with photos of you plastered to his bedroom wall.”

Her eyebrows shot straight upward. “You’ve been checking out my neighbors’ bedrooms?”

“I stopped in to say hi to a couple of the ones who lived closer when I saw them out doing yard work, wrangled my way inside for a drink of water, which led to a trip to the bathroom and enabled me to scope the house and get a feel for their personality.” He shrugged. “It’s not foolproof, but a quick look start.”

“And you’ve told them my problems?”

“I wouldn’t tell the divorced dentist next door jack about you because then he might make a move.” He looped his arms around her waist and buzzed her neck.

She wasn’t as easily put off.

“All right.” Calves cramping, he shuffled from foot to foot as unobtrusively as possible.

What he wouldn’t give to have his old body back. He would fling her over his shoulder and haul her inside for all-day sex. “Not your problems exactly, because I did have to take into account that I might be wrong in my estimation. I told a couple of the older ladies who’re home during the day that we’ve had trouble with teenage vandalism. That we’d appreciate it if they would keep an eye out and let us know if they see anything suspicious.”

“Oh.” She sagged back against a towering oak. “Good idea.”

“Damn straight.” Joining her by the tree, he dropped onto the tire swing and hauled her onto his lap instead of over his shoulder, not too bad an alternative after all.

He smothered her yelp of surprise with his mouth, lingered. Too easily he could hibernate here with her…

Rick lifted his head and his thoughts back to the crispy fall moment. “Never discount the obvious help just because it’s not full guns blazing.”

Hmm. Could that be a subliminal slip?

Sitting crossways on his lap, Nola rested her head against his shoulder while the swing creaked back and forth on the thick branch. “I would have thought you would be all about the firepower.”

“We make use of anything we’re given.” He hated self-pity, but he couldn’t shake thoughts of what he’d lost, memories of the man he’d been when she’d seen him five years ago, pumping push-ups on the floor.

Heaven knew he was digging deep in his arsenal when it came to impressing this woman. Maybe he needed to take some of his own advice on looking for ways to make a contribution without quite the same level of firepower. His training for pararescue might be parlayed into something less adrenaline-pumping, but maybe just as useful if only he could clear his head from the weight of frustration to figure out what in the hell that might be.

Nola wriggled on his lap to sit more securely. “Okay, you don’t think any of my neighbors are stalkers. I guess that’s a relief, except we’re not any closer to answers.”

Something he intended to do his best to change. Somebody needed to push the authorities harder, tap into some of the base intel personnel, none of which he could do until after the holiday.

Which left him with time on his hands now. “In the interest of being open and honest and sensitive, I’ll own up to the fact that all this activity has my legs aching and your wriggling has another part of me aching.”

She angled her face up to his, her blue eyes as clear as the sky he used to parachute through on a regular basis. “Are you angling for another massage of all your aching parts?”

“Maybe a peek at that Jacuzzi tub of yours.” That should put them on a more even footing.

He eyed the marshy shore just beyond her house and wished for warmer weather. Swimming with Nola, making love in the natural watery environment would be awesome. In spite of his injuries, he could seriously hold his own in the water.

Would he still be in the area in the spring to live out those fantasies with Nola? A weighty thought, premature at that. Right now, he could focus on the Jacuzzi and a more immediate, simple surprise for her.

“I believe that could be arranged.”

Fixing things around her house, getting to know her neighbors. Coming up with ways to surprise her, win her over.

This felt too much like digging in, planting roots.

Damn. He missed the old days when the stakes weren’t scary as hell, when he only faced catapulting himself out of an airplane into a jungle full of live fire.

Nola plunged her body into the churning bathwaters in the Jacuzzi, her body already tingling long before the frothing jets caressed her skin.

Rick had created an amazing seductive spa setting with a Thanksgiving feast surprise she would never forget. The man certainly had a creative way with making a personal moment from things scavenged during a simple grocery store run.

Bunches of mixed flowers in large tumblers surrounded the tub interspersed with candles. The scents clung to the humidity, saturating the air and her awakening senses as the tub’s motor hummed softly underneath her. And her own motor was pretty well humming by now, too.

Best of all, beside the faucet rested something that meant more than all the candles, flowers or security upgrades in the world. An ice bucket holding four…

Milk shakes.

Vanilla. Chocolate. Strawberry. And something green she really
hoped
was mint because no way would she hurt his feelings by doing anything other than tasting it with a grateful smile and
yum.

“Happy Thanksgiving,” Rick called from the doorway, one shoulder braced, his honed body on display and awesome even in jeans and T-shirt. “I wasn’t sure about your favorite flavor, but I wanted to add something to the meal.”

She scooped the strawberry shake from the bucket, lounged back and enjoyed the view along with a few memories from their night together that she couldn’t wait to repeat. “So this is what you put in that bag of yours when you snuck off at the grocery store.”

“That and the condoms.”

“Ice cream and condoms. A man after my own heart.” She put the straw in her mouth and drew on the creamy shake, holding his gaze.

His eyes narrowed. “A woman who doesn’t give a crap about flowers.” His voice went husky as his attention stayed right on her gently sucking on the straw. “A woman after
my
heart.”

She let her laughter float as freely as the bubbles rising toward her chin. How long had it been since she’d had this much fun? She never would have imagined being this lighthearted while some crazed nutcase gunned for her.

“You found my blender and everything.” Leaning forward, she traded the strawberry shake for the green. “You really went to a lot of trouble. I feel guilty. All I did was order the grocery store’s premade Thanksgiving meal.”

“I’m sure the pilgrims would have preferred the premade, hands down, if they’d been given the option.”

“Thank you.” She tasted the green shake—oh,
chocolate
mint. “How about you get rid of those clothes and join me?”

“Well, since it’s the doctor’s orders and all.”

“You want to play doctor?”

Barefoot, he shoved away from the doorjamb and lumbered toward her, shucking his shirt. “Among other things.”

He popped the top button free on his jeans to reveal his washboard stomach and her mouth dried right up. She brought her drink back to her lips and his pupils widened, his brown eyes darkening to cloudy skies.

Kicking his pants and boxers aside, Rick shook his head slowly. “Lady, your mouth is pure sin.”

She set her drink aside and held her arms open for him to join her. He lowered his body into the tub behind her, his thighs brushing her legs with tantalizing effect.

Nola settled back against his chest, sloshing bubbles over the side onto the rag-tie bath mat. “I did plan a more personal surprise for you later this afternoon.”

“Does it involve us staying naked?” He nipped her shoulder, his arms looping around her stomach.

“No, but that certainly would make the event all the more memorable.” She swallowed back a laugh at the thought of the two of them, naked, while… She couldn’t even finish the thought. It would be too funny. Too much of a fantasy.

She brought the milk shake to her mouth again and sucked, the creamy drink flooding her senses—and apparently her savoring driving Rick more than a little crazy because the next thing she knew he’d snatched her glass from her.

“If we’re not gonna stay naked,” he said. “Take back the gift.”

“Seriously now. You’ll really like this.” She hoped he would. God, what if she’d made a colossal error in judgment and hurt him with this? “Although since I made the reservation with my credit card which is officially frozen thanks to the creep, you’ll have to pay for your own Thanksgiving gift.”

“Will it bankrupt me?” He leaned back and snagged the vanilla shake for himself while his other hand disappeared under the water between her legs and…

Oh.

Her eyes fluttered closed for a second before she wrapped her hand around his so she could finish talking. “I make less than you do, pal, even with whatever your child support payments must be, so I seriously doubt this will throw you in the poorhouse. And no worries. When we untangle my finances, I fully intend to pay you back.”