Galloping Hearts (Contemporary Cowboy Romance) (Texas Heat series: Book 2, Mitchell and Moira's story) (7 page)

The next morning, Moira stayed in her bed until after breakfast. It was part sleep and part something so much deeper. She was bone weary tired from her thoughts and dreams the night before. She’d been so anxious over what to do and whether she was wrong for being angry, she hadn’t slept a proper wink all night. All she knew was she was still too angry to leave. She couldn’t sit next to Mitchell in his car without ripping into his hide about leaving out all this information. Still, as angry as she was, she knew his momma’s funeral wasn’t the time to rip him apart. She would save that for when he came back to the ranch, if her anger was still in control of everything.

Instead of facing her anger and issues head on, like she’d been taught to do her whole life, she stayed nestled under her feather duvet as she sweated in the Texas summer heat. Finally, she heard Billy and Mitchell say their good byes as they left the house. It was then that she dragged what felt to be a two ton carcass to the bathroom to take a shower. Instead of dealing with
anyone
that day, she would take Caliber out to the field. What she needed was some time under the tree, drawing and thinking.

When she finally carried herself downstairs, it was the latest start she’d had all summer. When she went into the kitchen, Grannie was already starting the midday meal for everyone. When the woman turned around, she looked at the floor.

Her grandmother spoke quietly. “I take it you didn’t sleep too well last night.”

She shook her head.

“For what it’s worth, he looked like a pile of manure himself. There were bags under his eyes and he had to all but drag himself to the table. In fact, Billy was the one driving when they left.”

She asked quietly. “Did he say anything?”

Grannie shook her head. “What was he supposed to say? You made your intentions very clear yesterday and then again today, with the empty spot next to him at the table this morning.”

She sighed. “Grannie, please, don’t. I’m going to the field today. I’m not sure what time I’ll be back. I need to be alone for a little while. If Daddy asks, let him know that’s where I am.”

Grannie went to the fridge. “Let me pack you a lunch.”

Her smile was small as she answered. “I’m fine. I think I just want some water to take out. I’m not too hungry today. I think we may have finally come across something your cooking can’t fix.”

Grannie chuckled as she closed the fridge. “Okay, Baby Girl. Just make sure to drink enough water. We don’t want you passing out under that tree of yours.”

She laughed. “Grannie, I’m sad and angry. I don’t have the vapors.”

The laugh from her Grandmother emanated from her belly. “No, I ain’t worried about no vapors. I
am
worried about the summer heat dehydrating you and you passing out.”

“Fair enough. Pack an extra bottle of water for me then.”

******

Moira went to the field, where she spent most of the day. She started with drawing the landscapes and portraits of Caliber. What she quickly found was that she began drawing pictures of Mitchell. Pictures of when they were under the tree and how relaxed he looked, more of him laughing at one of Billy’s stupid jokes as he sat beside her at the dinner table.

Before she realized it, the sun was heading far down into the horizon. It wasn’t night but it was late afternoon and she needed to head in to the house to get Caliber bedded down for the night. She loaded everything up, taking a while to ride the horse up to the property.

When she got to the barn, she spent extra time, washing Caliber down. She enjoyed the time and, as animals usually do, he seemed to sense she needed the extra time with him. He was tolerant of the bath and grooming, making sure he even nuzzled against her as she stroked his long face. Finally, as the dusk was coming on hard, she went into the house, ready to trudge up the stairs for a shower.

******

Moira had just settled onto her bed, in yoga pants and a tank top, with her wet hair piled on her head in a bun. She looked at her cell phone, half wanting to call Mitchell to check on him. Every time she went to dial him, she found she couldn’t hit the button. They’d spent all summer texting each other when they weren’t in the field but she couldn’t bring herself to make a simple phone call.

She stared at her phone screen as thoughts flit across her mind.
Well, I’ve really messed things up. I know I need to call him. Why can’t I even text him right now? Because I’m a dumbass who doesn’t want to say I’m sorry. I know I love him and Granny is right, it isn’t like he lied. Shoot, I wouldn’t have said that stuff to him, if the roles were reversed.

She worked hard to make her fingers start a text. Every time her fingers swiped across her screen, it read stupid and she’d erase it. Finally, in a moment of frustration, she tossed the phone in her comfy chair. It was yet another thing that she’d spent countless hours drawing in. Usually after everyone was in bed – and thought she’d been fast asleep.

As she looked around her room that was only lit by her desk lamp, she thought some more.
You know, he isn’t the only one who hasn’t shared everything. I never even showed him my room or any of my pictures from high school. Maybe that’s what Grannie was trying to tell me. We don’t share everything with people right away. His stuff was bigger than mine, mine was just some embarrassment over old pictures and worn out sheets on my bed. His was a sick momma, who people had probably made fun of him for his whole life. Good heavens, and the way I unleashed on him. I must be horrible.

Just as her eyes misted over and her lip began to quiver, she heard her phone blip with a text. She picked it up to see who it was from. It was Billy. The text was simple.

W
e got here ok. He set stuff up with the funeral home. He’s just having a small ceremony and then having his momma cremated. It’ll be tomorrow late morning. You sure you can’t come?

She texted Billy.
Oh, Billy, I messed up so bad. I don’t even think he’ll want to see me now.

There was no text back from Billy but she didn’t think much of it. She figured he was just busy helping Mitchell drown his sorrows in a pitcher – and maybe helping his new friend find a new girl.

She tossed and turned all night. At two in the morning, her phone rang. She looked down to find her brother was calling her. She was filled with an abject fear as she answered the phone.

“Billy? What is it?”

He sighed, his voice quiet. “Sis, you need to get your ass on down here.”

Her brow creased as she heard his whisper. “Why, what’s going on?”

“I didn’t text you back earlier because he asked me not to say anything in the first place. Still… this ain’t right. You need to be here for him. There ain’t no excuses. He’s losing his mind here. He spent an hour crying in the bathroom earlier. He told me he was taking a shower but you know how thin the walls in hotels are. I could hear him crying over the running water.”

Her shoulders slumped. “Shit. His momma is hitting him hard.”

Billy sighed. “For being so smart at school, you sure act dumb sometimes.”

She was angry that he’d call her stupid. “What’s that mean?”

She heard him pause, a door open and then close again. He’d left the room – when he spoke his voice was louder.

“It means that, sure, he’s sad about his momma but that’s not what has him all tied up.”

“What is it then? Daddy promised to save his job for when you two got back. Grannie said so.”

He chuckled. “For knowing so much and being in college, you sure can be a dingbat.”

“Get to the point then, jerk.”

“He’s sad about the funeral but he’s more sad about you. He thinks he’s lost you. You know why I called you?”

“Besides making me feel like crap, you mean?”

“Yeah, besides that?”

She sighed. “No.”

“He finally fell asleep and he started talking in his sleep. I didn’t know he was a talker. Anyway. He started saying your name and asking you not to leave.”She choked back a sob. “What?”

“Yeah. He thinks he ain’t got nothing to come back to at the ranch other than a paycheck, Moira. You need to be here for him.”

She looked at the clock and sighed. “It’s nearly two thirty. What time are the services tomorrow?”“Eleven. We’ll be heading to the funeral home a bit earlier. There’s some things Miss Lee couldn’t do for him as he’s kin and all. He has some things he needs to sign but she was nice enough to get everything set up.”

“Where’s it at?”

“I honestly don’t remember. Get on the road and I’ll call back with the name when I get in. You should have enough time to pack and get going.”

“How’d you know I was coming?”

“Because I know you love him and you were taught to do right by people.”

She sighed. “Y’all have more faith in me than I do right now.”

He laughed. “Nah, you’re just predictable. Leave everyone a note, they’ll get it. You can call when you get into town to let them know you made it safe.”

“Okay. Don’t forget to get me that name.”

“I won’t, Baby Girl. Just get yourself pulled together enough to drive. Shoot, wake Grannie. I’m sure she’d be willing to help right now.”

She shook her head. “William! I won’t do any such nonsense. I’ll just make a pot of coffee to take with me before I go.”

Another chuckle from her brother eased her as it was more relaxed. “Love you, sis. Drive safe.”

“Love you too, Billy. I will, promise.”

Moira crept down the stairs, working to miss the spots that creaked in the old wood. She started a pot of coffee in the dark kitchen before heading back upstairs to pack. She’d have to make some good time if she hoped to be there and ready.

She took another shower, even though her hair wasn’t quite dry from the one the night before. When she finished, she was grateful it had woken her up as that’d been her goal when she climbed in. In her room, she dressed in what she’d wear when driving. She needed something comfortable but would also be appropriate for a funeral. She rustled through her clothes before finally settling on a pair of khakis and a black blouse. She decided on a pair of black slides and some simple stud earrings before braiding her hair down her back.

As she looked herself over in the mirror, her only thought was,
This will have to do.

She packed some shorts and a t-shirt before heading downstairs to fill the thermos. When she went into the kitchen, she found it lit. At only three fifteen in the morning it was too early for Grannie to be up making breakfast. She usually didn’t start things in the kitchen until closer to four thirty.

When she finally made it in there, she saw her grandmother packing a cooler, the thermos already full. She sighed in exasperation.

“Grannie! Why are you up?”

Grannie’s laugh was warm as she answered. “Sweetheart, even if I hadn’t heard you head into the shower, I always know when someone’s in my kitchen.”

She shook her head. “You still didn’t have to get up.”

“No, sugar. I didn’t. But I couldn’t pack this cooler for you if I didn’t.”

She rubbed her forehead. “Grannie, I’ll be fine.”

Her grandmother turned around after closing the cooler. “It’s not you I’m worried about. You can’t cook worth a lick and that boy of yours is gonna need a good meal when everything is said and done.”

“How’d you whip up a meal that quick?”

Grannie winked. “I figured you’d come around. I cooked a small ham yesterday afternoon and made a bit extra potato salad and coleslaw. I also made a Johnny Cake so you guys can make some sandwiches if you want. There’s enough ice in here to keep it from going bad until you eat.”

She went over to the matriarch of their family, unsure how to handle her emotions. Instead of saying anything, she hugged her grandmother.

Grannie hugged her back and then pulled back, stroking her hair. “We all love you too, sugar. Now go on and git yourself to Austin.”

Moira smiled, only nodding as she picked up the cooler.

Grannie walked her to the door, whispering before she closed it. “I’ll tell your daddy where you went.”

She whispered over her shoulder, heading to her car. “Thank you, Grannie.”

The old lady nodded as the door began to close.

******

Moira drove, racing against the clock to get to Austin in time to meet the boys. She would feel even
worse
if she missed the service. The only times she stopped were to get gas for her car and pour herself another coffee.

By the time she hit the Austin city line, she was buzzing on caffeine. She wasn’t sure how she’d drive on the way home. She decided to worry about that when the time came.

She’d received the directions for the funeral home in a text around seven that morning. She put it into her phone’s GPS and let it guide her in. She spent the last leg of her drive listening to an automated woman’s voice give her directions.

Finally, at ten thirty, she arrived at the funeral home. Looking at it, she could tell it was a small family owned one. It was also obvious from its downtown location that more of its clientele were likely not very upscale. She sighed, wishing to herself that she could’ve helped Mitchell afford something better for his momma.

At ten fifty, she climbed out of her car, took a deep breath, and wiped her sweaty hands on the front of her pants. She wished she could’ve said it was from the heat. She knew better. She knew her palms were sweaty whenever she was nervous. In this case, she was nervous because of the funeral and because she had to apologize for being a dunce.

She walked into the building, followed the sign that indicated where the service would be. Outside the small viewing room, she took a deep breath to steady herself. She saw Billy sitting in a seat along the side. When he caught sight of her, he gave a small nod and an equally small smile.  Mitchell was standing in front of the casket, by his momma. Walking in as quietly as possible, she didn’t stop until she stood next to him.

He looked down at her as she brought her hand into the crook of his elbow. His eyes widened, almost as though he were seeing a ghost. His voice was quiet as he spoke.

“You came.”

She nodded but looked away from his eyes. “Yeah. I realized I was being an idiot.”

He shook his head. “Nah, it was a lot to take in and you were right, I should have told you sooner. Sorry about that.”

She turned him toward her and wrapped her arms around his waist. As his arms went around her shoulders, she felt his back muscles relax.

Shaking her head, she spoke evenly. “I’m the one who messed up here, Mitch. Don’t you be apologizing to me. I’m the one who needs to say it. I’ll say it now, and probably a couple more times, I’m sorry.”

He held her close, whispering to her. “I’m just so happy you came.”

“I should have been here the whole time. I’m sorry I wasn’t. What can I do to help you now that I am?”

He leaned back to look at her face. “I know this is going to sound weird given the circumstances but would you like to meet my momma?”

She smiled. “I’d be honored.”

They both turned toward the casket. When Moira looked at the woman, she was shocked by the dichotomies of her. She looked to be young but it was obvious her life and illness had aged her greatly.

She asked quietly. “What was your momma’s name?”He looked down, his hands resting on the side of the casket. “Maryanne.”

“She looks young. How old was she when she had you?”

“She was only twenty.”

She was shocked. Maryanne had only been forty-one at the oldest when she left this world and a life that’d been too much for her to handle.

“What was she like when she wasn’t sick?”

She watched Mitch stroke Maryanne’s coifed hair. “She was always a little unsure of the world. I think, even when she was on her medicine, her world would blur with the real world. Still, she was soft spoken and kind. Even though it wasn’t always shown the right way, I know she loved me my whole life. It took me longer to realize that her illness was stronger than her love but not as deep.”

She couldn’t help but put her hand over his. “So, have you thought about what you’re going to do with the ashes?”

He shook his head. “No, not really. I’m going to pick them up when we come back for school. The mortician said he would keep them safe for me until then.”

“Well, you have at least a couple weeks to decide then.”

He nodded.

Just then, Moira noticed the mortician come in to lead the ceremony. As Mitch led her to a seat, she noticed Miss Lee in the front row. They smiled at one another as Miss Lee gave her a small nod. Once everyone was seated, the service started.

******

Mitchell had thought he was having a sleep deprived daydream when Moira came to stand next to him. In the little bit of sleep he’d had the night before, he’d been plagued by nightmares. Nightmares that, even when he went back to the ranch, he was alone. In his dreams, Moira wouldn’t even look at him, much less speak to him. He was again relegated to his quarters, nothing more than an afterthought. Much like most of his childhood.

He was surprised she’d forgiven him for lying to her, more surprised she thought she didn’t have a right to be angry. She’d given him so many chances to come clean and he hadn’t. What made him happiest, after seeing her standing next to him, was that she asked about his momma.

There’d been so much of his life that he’d been embarrassed
about her illness and the actions it led her to have. But he’d loved her and he knew more than anything else, she’d loved him too. He didn’t realize how much until he’d gone to the funeral home and Miss Lee had given him a small bag of all his mother’s worldly belongings.

All of the things in her bag, the only things she’d carried around with her until the day she died, revolved around him. There were some of his school pictures, the program from his high school graduation, pictures he had drawn her when he was little and some cards he’d given her as he’d grown older. She even had his first report card from kindergarten in that bag. Her whole life was him and her voices. One was intangible and the other was all held within a gallon sized Ziploc bag. It meant a lot to him, that as non-traditional as his mother, and the relationship he’d had with her, had been, Moira wanted to know about her.

When the part of the service had come to play
Amazing Grace,
he held Moira’s hand as he cried. That had always been his mother’s favorite hymn. It was the one she would sing, whether she was lucid or not. As he thought about how his mother was finally at peace, he had an idea of where he’d like to spread her ashes. He’d have to discuss it with Moira later.