Gentleman's Guide 01 - His Impetuous Debutante (32 page)

She awoke slowly from her nap. She
didn’t want to wake. She wanted to stay in peaceful oblivion. Try
as she might, she couldn’t escape again. Opening her eyes slowly,
she noted it had gotten dark outside and her husband was asleep
beside her. Startled, she sat up. Glancing at the clock, she
realized it was only just after the dinner hour. So she hadn’t
slept into the night. At least not quite. She slipped from the bed,
trying not to wake Taylor, and dressed. It wasn’t that she was
being considerate of his need for rest. She just didn’t want a
confrontation.

At least clothed she could think more
clearly. She had no recollection of how she came to be sleeping in
her shift, unless Taylor had undressed her. What a horrid thought,
given the circumstances. Well, if anything, it proved that his
tastes now ran toward widows and not pregnant wives.

Seated in the chair she watched him
sleep. He was so handsome, it pulled at her heart. No, she would
not weaken because of his good looks. He had taken up with another
woman and she would not forgive him. At least not easily. She owed
it to him to hear what he had to say. After all, he did save her
today. For that, she should at least give him some consideration,
and perhaps she would wait to divorce him until after his birthday.
Would it be fair to make him forfeit his fortune and her child’s
future? Maybe it wouldn’t matter. Perhaps his mistress would want
to marry him when he was free.

Unable to stand it any longer, Phoebe
left the room quietly and walked until she was locked in the parlor
with her pianoforte. Seated, with her hands on the keys, Phoebe
couldn’t decide what to play first, but she no longer cared what
her family thought of her selections. She needed this outlet. She
was hurt, angry, confused. She was a mess.

Slowly the music started. Beethoven
was the composer and Phoebe played every Beethoven piece she could
recall. When her answers weren’t found, she became sadder and
switched to Pachelbel, and the tears flowed down her
face.

She loved Taylor so much. It was easy
to be angry from a distance, but when he appeared today and
literally held her life in his hands, all her feelings came to the
surface. He warned her not to believe what she heard. Had she
unfairly judged him?

Still, he had spent a weekend sharing
a room with that woman. Could it have been innocent after all? No,
she had heard descriptions. Taylor couldn’t be immune to that kind
of beauty. He had sent her those beautiful jewels. Were they
because he was guilty or because he loved her? She knew as well as
anyone how devastating the gossip could be. Had she unwillingly
been a victim? If so, how could he explain all his time spent with
that woman? Surely he hadn’t needed to spend almost every waking
hour with her just to convince people he was having an
affair.

Without conscious thought, the music
changed to Hayden as her irritation grew. As much as she tried to
defend him and deny the truth, Phoebe couldn’t. There was no
possible way he would have spent so much time with the countess
unless there wasn’t some very real attachment. If so, where did
that leave Phoebe and the child? Taylor would expect her to remain
his wife and live in the country. Did he expect her to hide and
raise their child while he carried on in society? Well, he could
think again. Even if she couldn’t get a divorce, it didn’t mean she
would take a passive role. No. If he could have his fun, so would
she. Not that she could ever consider taking a lover. But, how
would he feel if she did?

Ideas formed and her music changed
again to Bach. The child would be born sometime during the winter.
The Season wouldn’t begin for at least a few months after, leaving
her plenty of time to prepare. She wouldn’t stay at home this time.
No, she would go to London, with or without her husband. She knew
he would never give her a divorce, so she might as well forget the
idea. That didn’t mean she would have to be miserable either. No.
She may not have enjoyed the Season all that much before, but as a
married woman she was granted much more freedom. She didn’t have to
worry any longer about being ruined and could do as she pleased.
After all, she had provided an heir, thus fulfilling her
obligation. All she had to do was shield her heart and she could be
happy.

They would continue to live together
probably. She may even allow him back in her bed, eventually. If
there was even a hint that he was carrying on with another, then he
would have to forget any intimacies with her. Phoebe didn’t fool
herself into thinking she could live a life without ever being
intimate with Taylor again. She also wasn’t sure if she only wanted
one child. However, when it did happen, it would only be when she
was sure he wasn’t with someone else, and she was strong enough to
protect her heart from becoming involved. With months to wait, she
had time on her side. She had the advantage of preparing her
defenses and forming a strong wall of protection.

Satisfied with her decision, Phoebe
finished with a rendition of Mozart.

Taylor woke to an empty room, confused
for a moment. In the distance he could hear music. A quick survey
confirmed Phoebe was gone. With irritation, he dressed completely.
He had wanted to be alert when she awoke so they could talk.
Instead he had fallen into a deep sleep, and she hadn’t even
bothered to wake him.

Leaving the room, he made his way to
the parlor and tried the door. It was locked. Frustrated, he raised
his hand to knock.

“
Now is not the time,”
Noah said from behind.

“
Why?”

“
She is working through,
have you forgotten?”

Well, he would wait here until she
found her answer. He settled himself in a chair in the hall. Noah
leaned against the wall and raised a humorous eyebrow.

“
Why are you standing
around?” Taylor asked bitterly.

“
In the event you need an
interpretation.”

“
Then by all means.”
Taylor gestured to the other chair.

The music changed a few minutes later.
“She is sad and depressed,” Noah offered without question, at the
sound of Pachelbel.

Taylor moved to stand.

“
Not yet. If you ever
learn anything, learn this. When she is moving between types of
music as this, never disturb her until there is
silence.”

“
Why?”

“
Because an interruption
disrupts her thoughts and she has to start all over.”

“
You are serious?” Taylor
asked, having only heard her play two different types of music
before, never this emotional switch.

“
Wait and see. She isn’t
done. You can hear it.”

And listen he did. It wasn’t long
before he heard Hayden, which he believed was sad or maybe angry.
Taylor groaned and settled back, waiting, hoping this wasn’t where
she would stop. The wavering music seemed to continue a bit longer
than the others, and he was afraid that would be her mood when she
emerged. Finally, she turned again. Bach, but she only stayed with
him a short time before moving onto Mozart before she stopped
playing completely. As she had covered the negative emotions,
Taylor allowed himself to be hopeful and turned his eyes back to
Noah.

“
She is resigned and
somewhat pleased with her decision” Noah stood. “She will be
emerging soon.”

“
But not totally pleased?”
Taylor stood as well.

“
If she were happy, she
would have ended with Handel.”

As if on key, Phoebe opened the door.
She smiled openly at her brother, then presented a more formal
smile to her husband. “I am suddenly famished. You don’t suppose
Cook kept anything back, do you?” She asked of no one in particular
and walked right past them into the dining room.

“
I believe she has decided
to make you pay somehow.” Noah chuckled.

Taylor groaned. “So I
gathered.”

Taylor followed after her and a maid
informed them that if they would take a seat, dinner would be
brought to them shortly. They waited in silence. Phoebe read the
paper Noah had left on the table earlier and ignored Taylor
completely. He might as well not be in the room. When the plate was
set before her, she put the paper aside and gave her attention to
her food.

Taylor couldn’t stand the silence. “I
am glad you are feeling better. I had expected you to remain in bed
for a few days.”

“
I am a little sore from
the ordeal, but not enough that I need to be lying in bed.” She
shrugged and turned her attention back to her plate. This was more
difficult than he imagined. They hadn’t even addressed what had
occurred earlier in the day, ignoring the situation as if it hadn’t
happened. But they needed to talk about it. He would force the
issue if he had to.

“
Why did you leave the
house today? Or the day before? I thought you understood the
danger.”

Phoebe raised bored, angry eyes to
him. “I made an error in judgment. But he is gone. Dead. You no
longer have to fear losing what is rightfully yours.” She dismissed
him with a wave for her hand, the fork waved in the direction of
the ceiling.

“
Is that all you think I
care about?” Taylor asked, irritation rising. If she would only get
angry. If she would only yell at him.

“
Taylor, I am sure you
care for me and the child, but don’t pretend to feel any more than
you do.” Pain flashed in her eyes briefly.

“
You did start to believe
the rumors.” Standing suddenly, he knocked the chair over, causing
it to crash to the floor. He didn’t care.

“
I don’t see why you are
so upset. It is not as if this doesn’t occur in all marriages. I am
fine with it. Truly, I am. You will have your heir and next Season
we will return to London. I won’t ask you to stay by my side, and I
will enjoy the freedom of being a married woman.”

So this was her answer. Was she making
him pay or did she really believe this was to be their life from
now on?

“
Is that what you
want?”

“
That doesn’t really
matter now, does it?” She stood and left the room.

Taylor spent the next hour
contemplating her words. There was no way in hell he was going to
allow her to continue on her own next Season, nor did he have any
intention of taking a mistress. Somehow he had to bring her around
to where they were, before the nightmare began. With no specific
plan in mind, he mounted the steps, determined to follow his wife
into slumber. Perhaps they would both be better able to deal with
this in the morning.

Perhaps not. Her door was locked and
he had no doubt she intended to keep him out.

Now he was irritated. No, he was
angry. Finding a maid, he was shown to a guest room, where he spent
a restless night.

*

Taylor’s frustration mounted when he
discovered she had already left the house. They were at her home
and he was at a disadvantage. Today they would return to his home,
where she couldn’t escape so easily and where he had a key to every
door.

The family was seated at the breakfast
table when she breezed into the dining room. Filling her plate, she
took a seat and totally ignored him. He watched her eat a large
meal. At least she wasn’t neglecting her health. As she moved her
plate aside, Taylor stood. “I would like a word with you, dear.”
Irritation rang in his voice.

Phoebe sighed heavily and rose from
her seat, allowing him to escort her into another room. Closing the
door, Taylor turned to face her. “It is long past the time we
should discuss what is bothering you.”

Phoebe feigned ignorance. “Nothing is
bothering me any longer.” She attempted to walk past
him.

Taylor grabbed her arm. “This distance
isn’t exactly how I viewed our reunion.”

“
Then I suppose you should
have explained what you expected.” Rising on tiptoes, she kissed
him on the lips. It was barely a kiss. “I am sorry I didn’t welcome
you as a proper wife yesterday. It was a bit hectic. I’ll try not
to be remiss again.” She smiled at him sweetly.

Taylor ground his teeth. “I would like
to return to my estate today.” He had to get her to a place he felt
in more control.

“
Oh, don’t feel you need
to stay here on my account. I am perfectly safe now. I don’t wish
to leave quite yet. You understand.”

No, he didn’t. “No, I
don’t.”

“
I wish to be near my
mother right now.” She patted her abdomen. She would use any weapon
she had at her disposal.

“
If that is your wish.
I’ll send for a few of my things.”

“
Taylor, it isn’t
necessary. I promise to send word when the time comes. I know there
are other matters you must see to.”

“
Nothing is more important
than you, Phoebe.”

“
Really?” She raised
questioning eyebrows. Then she turned, throwing her hands up in
resignation. “Taylor, this isn’t necessary. I am resigned to how
things are to be. I was young and foolish when I talked of having a
marriage different from the others. I realize that now and you
don’t have to try and protect my feelings.”