Get Some Headspace: 10 minutes can make all the difference (20 page)

In the same way that walking and eating have become very habitual for many people, so has running. This has its uses, as it means that it’s easy to slip into a semi-conscious state of running, where the physical movement is so familiar that little concentration is required. Because of this, the mind tends to drift off very easily. So it’s normal for the mind to wander when you’re running, regardless of whether the thoughts are related to the running itself, or something quite separate. But the only way to ensure that you’re performing to the very best of your ability, is to leave the thinking behind and allow the body and mind to work together with a combined physical and mental focus. You don’t need to ‘try not to think’, but rather bring your attention to the process, rhythm and sensation of running. When you realise the mind has wandered off, just gently bring it back to the object of focus again.

Have you ever wondered why it is that at the very moment your head hits the pillow at night, your thoughts seem to go into overdrive? I often hear this process being described as insomnia (because we like to give labels to things), but if it only happens every so often, then it’s perhaps more accurate to describe it as being human. The interesting thing about this experience is that it’s not always quite as it appears. Lying down in bed at night, free from all distractions, is not unlike the first few moments of meditation. Suddenly you’re alone with your thoughts. All day you’ve been so busy with other people or doing other things, that these thoughts have been nothing but background noise in your head. While you may have had a vague awareness of this background noise, of thoughts coming and going, it’s quite likely that many of them will have gone unacknowledged, unprocessed. Lying there undisturbed in the silence, it’s only natural that those thoughts would become more obvious. It’s a bit like the moment when you take off the blindfold in the road analogy I used earlier. So, is there anything you can do about this? The answer is most definitely yes, however it’s useful to have a good understanding of the dynamic at work before you learn the exercise itself.

Let’s say that you’ve had a busy day at work, come home, had a bite to eat and then watched a programme on television or been busy on the computer. While you might have felt fine watching television, engaged and distracted by what was on, having gone to bed you now suddenly feel very restless and agitated. Perhaps there’s something specific on your mind, or perhaps it’s simply the busy nature of the mind, the thoughts whizzing by, one after the next. Or maybe it’s reflective of your lifestyle choices, irregular sleeping hours, jet-lag, or intake of stimulants. Whatever the reason, when the mind has built up a lot of momentum like this, it can take a little while for the thoughts to settle down. Of course we generally want them to settle immediately and when they don’t, we inevitably end up feeling disappointed, frustrated, worried or upset. It’s as if the more you try to shut the thoughts out, the more they seem to appear.

This isn’t just your imagination working overtime, logic dictates that if you start thinking a lot about not being able to get to sleep, then you are by definition creating lots of additional thoughts. And by putting lots of effort into the process, you will at the same time be creating tension. In just the same way as meditation, the more you resist those thoughts and feelings, the more tension you create and this tension will be reflected and experienced in the body as well. It’s usually at this point that the internal dialogue kicks in. ‘I just can’t get comfortable tonight . . . maybe I’ll turn over and try on my other side . . . and I wonder why Harry said that today . . . did he mean something else? . . . maybe I should roll over . . . stop thinking, you need to get to sleep . . . oh no, my head’s really busy again . . . why am I thinking so much? Oh it’s so late . . . I’m never going to get to sleep . . . this feels just like last time when I couldn’t sleep . . . and I felt terrible the next day . . . and I’ve got that really important meeting tomorrow . . . it’s going to be a disaster . . . and I’m going to look terrible . . . why can’t I just switch off these thoughts? OK, just relax, don’t think about trying to go to sleep . . . but I can’t stop . . . maybe I should get up . . . maybe I should read a book . . . stop thinking . . . oh why is my mind so busy?’

This may sound funny during the cold light of day, but when it’s happening to us at night, the experience is anything but humorous. You may well feel angry at your inability to control the flow of thought, or scared that the thoughts will run away and lead to a sleepless night. You may feel depressed at the prospect of feeling tired the next day, or perhaps even worried that there’s something wrong with you. These reactions are all quite normal and you’re in no way alone in your experience. It stands to reason that the busier and more stressed you are during the day, the more likely this situation will occur at night, but it can sometimes become a habit quite separate from the affairs of day-to-day living. Whichever it is, the fact that it’s behavioural rather than physiological (and I’m assuming this is something you will have clarified with your GP if you have serious concerns) means that it can change. And it can change in one of two ways. Either the habit of resistance is ‘unlearned’, or a new, more positive way of relating to the thoughts and feelings is adopted. I’ve experienced both over the years, and there was one situation in particular when this technique proved invaluable.

Turning up at the airport in Moscow, I didn’t really know what to expect. I’d heard a lot of things about the city, and about Russia in general, but I didn’t really know how much to believe. It was just at the time that residential apartment blocks in different parts of the city were being randomly targeted and blown up in the middle of the night. The Russian government accused the Chechens of terrorism, and the Chechen government accused the Russians of conspiring to create the grounds for invading their territory in the south of the country. Needless to say, there was a palpable sense of anxiety in the air. People had started to look at their neighbours in a different way, especially if they were foreign or from another part of Russia. It wasn’t so much that everyone was a suspect, but more that everyone felt a certain responsibility to look out for any strange activity. Back in the Soviet days, every apartment block had a ‘babushka’, an elderly woman who would sit at the front of the building and monitor all the activity within it. During the apartment block bombings, this tradition was fully resurrected in all buildings, with the babushkas keeping an eye out and reporting anything unusual to the police.

Having arrived late in the evening, the lady who’d met me at the airport dropped me off at the flat and arranged to meet me the next morning. I didn’t even notice the elderly woman peeking out of her front window as I walked up the stairs. I was too tired to do anything much when I got to the flat, but unpacked a few very simple items. It had become a bit of a ritual for me that wherever I travelled, the first thing I would do was set up a small area for meditation. I guess it just reflected the priority I gave to it at that time. So I wiped down the surface of a shelf, took out a few simple objects, a couple of pictures of my teachers, and placed my meditation cushion on the floor in front of it. Realising I would fall asleep if I sat to meditate then and there, I decided to go to bed and get up first thing in the morning and do it then instead. So, leaving the rest of my stuff in the suitcase, and not even taking the time to make my bed, I simply took off my clothes and fell asleep.