Authors: Sarah Rayne
What happened was that Mother, wearing her gardening things, came in from the kitchenâshe must have been outside because there was a spattering of rain across her shouldersâShona could see the little drops in the lamplight. She was trundling a large wheel-barrow piled with bricksâthe bricks and the barrow were leaving a trail of dust all over the nice oak floorâEdna Cheesewright was not going to like
that
when she came in on Wednesday!âbut Mother did not seem to care about the brick dust or even notice it. She stopped just inside the propped-open door, and a man came up from the cellar below. At first Shona shrank back in panic because it
was
a burglar after allâit was certainly a strangerâand then she saw with a shock that the man was wearing Grandfather's old tweed jacket and the chewed-up hat he kept for bad weather. Mother always said the jacket and the hat were a disgrace and Father should think shame to be seen in them and she would put them on a bonfire one of these days.
It was Grandfather, it really
was
, but his eyes were like little black pits and his expression was so dour and grim that Shona began to be frightened in a different way. It was as if something else had put on the old jacket and the battered hat and was pretending to be her grandfather, like when the wolf dressed up in frilly nightclothes and lay in wait for Red Riding Hood. Would Grandfather suddenly snarl and pounce and slaver, as the wolf had done in the woodland cottage?
But he seemed intent on helping her mother get the wheelbarrow with its heap of bricks down the steps inside the door. Shona could not see them but she could hear the wheelbarrow bumping and scraping as it went down. She heard her mother say, âThe last load, I think,' and her grandfather reply, âYes, we've enough now, but it's taken longer than I expected.'
What had taken longer than expected? What was this about? Greatly daring, Shona crept down the stairs, and crossed the hall.
A dull light came up from the cellar and, as she peeped down, Shona saw they had lit the storm-lanterns that were kept for power cuts. There were three lanterns, set on the floor, and in their light she could see the mound of old bricks in one cornerâmasses and masses of bricks, all lying higgledy-piggledy. There was a tub of something grey and sloshily wet nearby, and a little clutter of gardening things: a trowel and a small spade. The person who was so scarily unlike her grandfather but who still had his face was moving about. He was lit from below by the storm-lanternsâperhaps it was just the light that was making him look so strange. Shona hoped so.
He bent down and lifted something that had been lying in a corner. Shona saw it was a woman of about twenty-five with long brown hair. Her face was a mottled blue-grey and Shona had a feeling she ought to know who she was, but although she looked very hard, she did not recognize her at all. Whoever she was, she was so still Shona thought she must be dead. It was how dead people looked in comicsâshe had seen them at school. This was very bad indeed. Shona would not have picked up a horrid dead body in her arms, but her grandfather did not seem to care. He did not look scary now, he looked as if he might be trying not to cry and he stood quite still for a moment, holding the woman in his arms. Shona felt a sudden surge of loathing for the brown-haired woman because her grandfather and mother were both looking down at the horrid dead face with such immense love. They had never looked at Shona like that, not ever! She thought nobody had ever looked at her like that in her whole life. Her mother always had lots of things to do in the house and garden, and her grandfather was only ever disapproving, telling her to be quiet, or to do her homework, and wanting to know why she could not occupy her time with boring old embroidery and pressing wildflowers. Remembering that, Shona found herself hating the brown-haired woman who made Grandfather's face go all soft and silly, and Mother's eyes fill with tears.
Grandfather put the woman in a little recess at the back of the cellar. It was the tiniest space imaginable and there was not room to lay her down on the ground so he propped her against the wall and the black pipes immediately behind it. Twice she flopped forward, falling onto his chest, and Shona saw her mother shudder. But at the third attempt the woman stayed upright, wedged between the thick pipes, her head lolling forward. Grandfather glanced at Shona's mother, then leaned forward and cupped the dead face in his hands, and kissed the forehead. After a moment, her mother stepped forward and did the same. This was disgusting. Shona felt sick to see them kissing this woman, sick with jealousy.
Grandfather squared his shoulders as if he had to take on an immensely heavy burden, and began to build up the bricks to hide the woman. His face had the scary expression again, as if the wolf might be about to throw off the disguise and leap forward.
Her mother did not seem to see this. She helped him lay the bricks and put on the wet cement. Once Grandfather said, half to himself, âSuch wickedness, Margaret,' and Mother let out a half sob, and then said, âThe wickedness was never meant, Father. You do know that.'
âOf course I know.' His hands, a bit twisted with arthritis, reached out to hers and enclosed them for a moment.
âI can hardly believe you're doing this for me.'
âI look to my own,' he said gruffly.
âBut the risk. If it's ever discoveredâ'
âIt won't be discovered,' he said. âWe'll do what has to be done, and then it'll never be spoken of. The wall will look like part of the cellar. No one else need ever know.'
âNo one must ever know,' said Mother. âNever.'
Neither of them said anything after this, and for a long time the only sound was the wet slapping of the cement and the scraping of the bricks, and the laboured breathing as Shona's grandfather worked.
Shona watched, seeing they were building the wall all the way up to the ceiling, seeing that this woman was going to be so well hidden no one would ever guess she was thereâas Grandfather said, the wall would just look like part of the cellar. It would be horrid behind the wall: the water pipes would clank and hiss to themselves in the dark, and spiders and black beetles would come out when it was quiet and scuttle over the woman's feet.
It seemed to take for ever to lay the bricks in neat rows and cement them into place, but eventually they reached the ceiling. Shona watched for a bit longer, then went quietly back to bed. She could not sleep and lay awake for a long time, going over and over what she had seen. Who had she been, that woman, and why were Mother and Grandfather hiding her body?
The really strange thing was that when Shona woke up next morning, it all seemed so unreal she was not entirely certain it had actually happened. Her mother and grandfather could surely not have put an unknown lady behind a wall and left her there in the dark. The more Shona thought about it, the more unlikely it seemed. It must have been another nightmare; she would forget it and look forward to her birthday.
But she did not forget completely. She dreamed about it, often for four or five nights in a row. Sometimes she dreamed she was in the cellar on her own, listening to her grandfather walking about the house, humming his songs as he went. For some reason this was very frightening indeed, because she knew her grandfather must not find her. But, just as his shadow appeared on the stairs, huge and terrifying in the darkness, she woke up. She was always sticky with sweat and gasping after these dreams, and once she had to get out of bed to be sick, doing it in the basin on the old-fashioned washstand because she dare not let anyone hear her going to the bathroom at the end of the corridor.
On the mornings after the dream came, her mother sometimes said at breakfast that Shona looked pale and asked if she felt all right. Shona always said she felt quite all right, thank you. Once or twice she wondered whether to tell her mother about the dream and see what she said, but she never did.
It seemed that after all there was not to be a ninth birthday party. Her mother thought it would cause too much disruption; it would mean a lot of work, she said, and Shona's grandfather did not really like being disturbed. Better if they just had a little celebration by themselves. Shona could have her presents and she would ask Mona Cheesewright to bake a special cake with candles. There was not much point in arguing so Shona did not bother. One day she would find a way of getting all the things her mother and grandfather were not letting her have now.
Life at Grith was somehow different after her ninth birthday; it was quieter and Grandfather hardly ever hummed little songs to himself as he went about. He spent a lot of time shut in his study, although Shona did not think he actually studied anything there. Mother sat staring into space for hours, not saying anything and not seeming to be aware of what was around her. Quite often in the evenings she said in a rather unfamiliar voice that she would take a little nip of sherry; it was good for the digestion, sherry. When she came up to kiss Shona goodnight, the kiss smelt quite strongly of sherry. Some nights she did not come up at all and Shona knew there had been several quite big nips of sherry and maybe of whisky as well, and that her mother had fallen asleep in her chair and forgotten about the goodnight kiss.
When Shona and her mother went away for their usual little holiday at Shona's half term which Grandfather liked them to do each autumn on account of it giving them a rest from each other, the walks they normally took together along Robin Hood's Bay did not happen. After lunch Mother always said she was tired, but Shona knew it was because she had drunk too much of the whisky she had hidden in her suitcase. Shona did not miss the walks very much, but it was just one more thing that was different about her life.
The other thing that seemed different was that her mother said she must remember never to go through the door behind the hall screen. âYou can go anywhere else in the house,' she said, âbut not down there.'
When Shona asked why not, her mother said, âBecause it's dangerous. It goes down into the foundations of the house.'
Her grandfather added something about damp seeping in from the moor. âMoil Moor sometimes overflows a bit after heavy rain. It's likely that the cellar occasionally gets flooded.'
âOh, I see,' said Shona.
Grandfather put a carved screen across the cellar door, which he said was a rood screen and had come from a church. It partly hid the door so that it was not very noticeable, except that Shona always noticed it because of the dream and because of having a vague memory that there was something very bad and very frightening on the other side of the door. When they ate Sunday dinner in the hall, which her grandfather liked to do on account of it being a tradition at Grith, her eyes kept going to the screen. There were secrets behind that door. Over the years, secrets came to taste of roast beef and the thick gravy her mother always made on Sundays.
G
RANDFATHER DIED JUST
before Shona's thirteenth birthday.
He had been ill for several weeks, and had sent for a distant cousin to come to Grith House to help nurse him. Her name was Elspeth Ross and Mother told Shona that Elspeth would most probably be living with them at Grith House. It was what Shona's grandfather wanted, said her mother; he had said they must look to their own.
âI look to my own.' That was what the figure in the dream had saidâwhat he still said when the dream came. âI look to my own⦠We'll do what has to be done⦠No one else need ever know.'
Shona had never heard of Cousin Elspeth, who was a slab-faced female a few years older than her mother. She wore granite-coloured jumpers and tweed skirts and clumpy shoes. Shona, who was noticing things like clothes more and more, could not imagine where Elspeth found such things or how she could bring herself to wear them. When she said this to Anna, she had the impression that Anna tossed her head and said, Oh, you saw all kinds of frumps in the Ross family, hadn't Shona realized that by now? This again seemed to indicate that Anna knew, or had known, some of the family.
Mother said Elspeth had fallen on hard times, poor soul, but Shona was not sure if she had got this right, because a lot of things seemed to get done to Grith after her arrival. One of these was the fitting of new locks on all the doors and some of the windows. Cousin Elspeth told Shona she liked to be secure in any house where she lived. You could not be too careful, she said, in fact she always locked her bedroom door at night. It was a good thing to do and Shona should remember it and lock her own door.