Gladiator Heart (32 page)

Resigned to what he knew he must do, he went over to the bed where she slept soundly. The long waves of her blonde hair fanned out on the pillows behind her and her soft skin beckoned for his touch. They would have this one last night together, then he would let her go and hope in time that he would forget the woman who had opened his hardened heart.

He undressed and climbed into the bed, stretching out beside her so his hands could explore her naked flesh. Valeria stirred from her sleep and looked up at him with her bright, blue eyes.

“How much longer can we stay in this bed?” she asked, smiling in contentment.

“In all honesty, not much longer.” He dragged his fingers over her bare stomach, lightly stroking her skin. “I have to think about leaving.”

She tensed, and her smile faded. “We knew the time was coming. You shouldn’t have stayed this long.”

“I want you to be safe after I leave.”

“I can take care of myself,” she said, but wouldn’t meet his gaze. “Rome is my city.”

“Your city is in chaos,” he said. “It’s not safe for you to stay at the palace alone. Where will you go?”

“I can stay with Lucia. Her villa is safe. The mob might rule, but no one wants to bring harm to a healer. They could come to need her services.”

It appeared she’d been giving her future some thought, and he had no place in it. She would be fine without him, her life would go on, so it would be useless to ask her to leave with him and travel north. While he knew she had feelings for him, those feelings didn’t run deep enough to make her want to give up the life she had in Rome.

“Is something wrong?” She frowned, a look of concern crossing her face when he didn’t speak.

“Nothing.” Tristan shook his head. There was nothing left for him to say. The future was decided. He would leave Rome, and she would stay. It was the only option that made sense.

This last night was not a time for words. It was a time for goodbye.

“Please, tell me what you’re thinking,” she said, laying a soft hand on his cheek. “You look troubled.”

Tristan lifted her hand and brought it to his lips so he could press a gentle kiss to her palm. If she went north with him, her soft skin would become hardened and calloused from riding on horseback rather than in carriages, and from carrying buckets of water to draw her own baths, or cook her own meals. He couldn’t drag her into that kind of life. Over time, she would come to despise him and regret leaving her home.

“Tristan?” Her frown deepened. “What’s wrong?”

He choked on the hard knot in his throat, and rather than answer, took her mouth in a sweeping kiss. Valeria clasped the back of his head and pulled him closer as their lips melded in fire and longing. He lavished her with kisses on her cheeks, her eyelids, along her sensitive neck. She moaned, while her hands traced the lines of his back, moving up and down until she brought gentle shivers to the surface of his skin.

“I’m going to spend the few hours we have left to us loving you,” he said, pausing to kiss to her ripe lips. “If there is one night you’ll never forget as long as you live, I want it to be this one.”

Valeria wrapped her arms around the breadth of his back and pulled him down on her. “Then love me, Tristan. Love me for as long as you’re able.”

His thick erection pulsed in anticipation, but he wanted to savor every inch of her, to make it last. He touched her breasts, filling his palm with their roundness, gently plucking at one nipple with his fingers, then the other, turning them into swollen, pink buds. He lowered his head and drew one into his mouth, sucking it and flicking it with his tongue. As he moved back and forth between each rosy peak, his hand explored the insides of her smooth thighs, then higher, to the soft petals of flesh. His fingers teased and played as he closed in on her little nub of pleasure and circled it gently. She grew slick from his touch, so he slipped his finger inside to stroke her rising passion. She was hot, tight, and he ached to shaft himself deep inside her silken sheath and make her his.

Valeria moaned and writhed beneath him, her body shivering under his touch. She dug her nails into his back and clung to him as he moved his finger in and out. He caressed her velvety heat until she was weeping for him, spiraling closer and closer to her release.

“
Yes
,” she moaned between her panting breaths. “Don’t stop.”

But he had to stop. He wasn’t ready to give her release, and he pulled his finger away. She gave a cry of frustration that quickly turned to one of surprise and delight as he buried his face between her thighs and closed his mouth over her sex. He licked and tasted her hot, wet flesh. Her sweet nectar coated his tongue and he flicked her swollen nub, then sucked it into his mouth.

Valeria screamed with pleasure and arched up from the bed. She clutched his head between her hands and her soft, short moans grew louder as she watched him lap at her with a look of pure ecstasy on her beautiful face. That was how he wanted to remember her. He could wait no longer.

Tristan slid up along her body and stretched out on top of her. “Spread your legs, little Roman, and let me possess you.”

“Make me yours, Tristan.” She opened to him. “I need to feel you inside me.”

He rose up on his knees and grasped her hips to lift her from the bed. With one, swift thrust, he impaled her with his rigid length. They both cried out as their bodies joined in ecstasy. Tristan started a fast bucking of his hips and thrust into her hot, wet sheath again and again. Valeria threw her hands over her head and thrashed about on the pillows, her full, round breasts bouncing up and down as he plundered her with one ravaging thrust after another.

And too soon it was over. He felt her clench and contract, going tight around him, and as she came, she moaned his name. Tristan lost himself to his own release and gripped her hips tightly as he raced toward a violent climax. With a shuddering groan the pleasure burst forth and he spilled inside her until there was nothing left of him.

Without Valeria, he was afraid there really would be nothing left of him.

Valeria awoke at dawn. She hadn’t been fully asleep, merely languishing in the glow of her and Tristan’s lovemaking. The bed beside her was empty, and across the room, Tristan was fully dressed and strapping his sword around his waist.

She had a sinking feeling in her gut. Was this it? Was their time now over?

It was impossible not to panic. She’d known their time would come to an end, but she hadn’t bothered to consider how she would feel when it did. A thousand times she’d told herself that while she had feelings for Tristan, she didn’t love him. The lie was a painful knot of regret as she watched him ready to leave.

But what did it matter if she loved him? He would never be capable of returning her love. She was a Roman. He hated Romans. Of course she didn’t blame him, knowing what pain her people had inflicted upon him, but she wasn’t one of them. Not anymore. Valeria sought a new life. One where she was free.

“It’s time to get dressed,” Tristan said. “We must to go.”

Valeria wished with all her heart that he would take her with him and she would be free of Rome and Gaius and her family. Since he’d never asked, had never so much as mentioned the prospect, it felt silly to let herself dream. He loved what they shared in bed. Now that it was over, he would return to his life and find some other woman to warm him through the long, cold nights in the north.

“Where are we going?” She glanced out the window. The sunrise was changing the night sky to soft colors of rose, orange and violet. “It’s so early.”

“I’m getting you out of here and taking you to Lucia’s where you’ll be safe. We have to go before the others are awake to stop us.”

“Why would they stop us from leaving?” For the last few days she’d watched Tristan move freely about the palace, bringing her food and news of the rebellion. What had changed?

“They want to keep you here,” he explained. “To use you if they should have to negotiate with the legions or your uncle.”

Valeria gasped. This whole time she’d been a prisoner in her own home and hadn’t even known. Tristan had done his best to keep her distracted. Feeding her, bathing her, making love to her over and over. He told her he wanted to protect her, to keep her safe, when the truth was…

What
was
the truth?

Did it matter?

In a short time she would be at Lucia’s, and he would be gone. As angry and hurt as she felt, she didn’t want to ruin her memory of the last few days. She climbed off the bed and walked over to her wardrobe. A dark blue stola caught her eye and she pulled it on over a clean tunic, then bound her waist with a white ribbon. After she slipped into a pair of sandals, she started gathering some extra clothes. And she had to get the money she’d hidden.

“There isn’t time for that.” He took the things from her and threw them to the floor, then grabbed her hand and led her out of her rooms.

She dug in her heels to stop him. “I have to get something. I promise to hurry—”

He tightened his grip and walked faster, pulling her along. “I told you there’s no time. We leave now, or we’ll never get out of here.”

Valeria was sick to leave all her money behind, but getting out of the palace with her life was more important. Not many stirred this early in the morning. Mostly the servants were in the kitchen preparing to start the day. Tristan led her out of the servants’ entrance and across the grounds to the imperial stables.

Angus waited just inside with a large chestnut steed saddled and ready. It was one of her uncle’s favorite horses.

“Fine morning, isn’t it?” he asked, flashing a dazzling smile.

This was the first time Valeria had seen him since that fateful day in the arena. Tristan had told her of their plan, how they had staged a fight for the rebellion, and she was happy Angus was recovering from his injury so well. His cheeks were rosy with a healthy glow and he appeared to be in good spirits.

“No one raised any questions about our leaving.” Tristan accepted the reins when Angus handed them over. “I shouldn’t be more than an hour.”

“Everything is good on my end,” Angus said, sparing a quick, hesitant glance for Valeria. “I’ll be waiting.”

Valeria watched with interest as Angus slung a bag over his shoulder and walked across the grounds, headed towards the city rather than back to the palace. He and Tristan were wasting no time getting out of Rome. They’d be gone within the hour.

Tristan lifted himself into the saddle first, then reached down for her. “Let me help you up.”

Though she didn’t want to see him go, there was nothing she could do to stop him or change his mind, so she slid her hand into his and let him hoist her into the saddle in front of him.

Every plane of his hard body came into contact with hers as he situated his weight behind her to get more comfortable. She was half-seated in his lap by the time he slapped the reins and steered the horse down the hill to the city.

The slow, easy pace of their ride created a sensual friction between their bodies and it wasn’t long before she felt his hard erection pressing into her backside. In her mind, she had visions of him stopping the horse and taking her down to the green grass to make love to her one last time. But he didn’t speak at all. She could think of nothing to say, but the closer they got to the city, the less she wanted to get off the horse. Being so close to Tristan, with his arms around her and his warm body pressed close to her, she thought she could ride with him to the end of the world and back and it wouldn’t be far enough.

She wasn’t ready to see him go.

A sob of despair rose in her throat and she swallowed past it, desperately racking her mind for something to say.
Anything
. But no words could convey what she was feeling. She wanted to stay with him, for them to be together, and he didn’t feel the same.

When they reached the city, the loud noise of activity made talking almost impossible. People were going about their day-to-day business, selling goods and services, bargaining with the street vendors and laughing and gossiping with each other. It was as if the rebellion had never touched the streets.

The activity stopped when people saw Tristan passing by with her on the horse, and he became the main topic of their conversations. They said what a brave warrior he was, how grateful they were that he’d joined the rebellion, how because of him, the city of Rome would be free. He’d given the people the one thing they needed the most. He’d given them hope.

Despite his status as a hero of the city, Valeria knew once the legions returned everything would change. If they discovered him, they’d make an example of him to show the people of Rome what happened to those who dared to defy the Empire. She’d worked too hard and prayed too much for it to end like that. Her vow to him was fulfilled.

They finally stopped in front of Lucia’s villa. This would be her home until the palace was taken back. Or until she was forced to do her duty and marry Gaius. She hoped he was dead. It was a terrible thought, but it gave her comfort.

Tristan jumped off the horse to the ground, then held his arms up to her and gently helped her slide down. Valeria remained standing there, her hands still clutching his shoulders, while his hands stayed firmly planted on her waist.

She stared into his cool, grey eyes for the last time, and once again, she felt that thread of something form between them, like a force that connected them and drew them together. It was like neither one of them wanted to let go of the other. Tristan was the one to let go first.

“You should be safe here,” he said, gathering the horse’s reins in his hand.

“Safer than the palace,” she agreed in a shaky voice, on the verge of tears. “Thank you for bringing me.”

“I’m sorry things couldn’t be different.” His eyes filled with a tenderness and a longing she understood, and it almost broke her heart.

Was she a fool to let him walk out of her life without telling him how she truly felt? Why couldn’t she just say the words?

I love you, Tristan.

“Do you think if things had been different…” she tried to get the words out. “Maybe if we—”