Glimmers of Change (51 page)

Janie knew she was gaping, but she couldn’t help herself. “Elizabeth Cady Stanton?” she said faintly. She had heard so much about the grandmotherly woman with plump cheeks and tight curls who was the president of the National Women’s Right Committee and who had
helped organize the world’s first women’s rights convention in 1848.
When she looked into her eyes, she saw the fire and determination that had propelled her to fight for women’s rights for the last two decades, all while she and her husband were raising seven children. Janie couldn’t help but feel awe.

Carrie’s eyes were equally as wide. “It’s quite an honor to meet you, Mrs. Stanton. Thank you for all you’ve done for women.”

Mrs. Stanton smiled graciously. “It’s a pleasure to meet both of you. Abby has told me a little about both of you.” She turned to Janie first. “I understand your husband was quite a cad, my dear. I’m so proud of you for leaving him. Quite frankly, I don’t believe any woman should stay in a marriage that makes them unhappy. You have reclaimed your life and become a medical student. You make me realize everything we are fighting for is worth it!”

Janie stared at her, not able to find a single thing to say in response. She knew, though, that Mrs. Stanton’s words would carry her forward for a long time.

Mrs. Stanton turned to Carrie next. “And you, my dear, have long been a rebel.”

Carrie smiled. “So I’m told,” she said ruefully. “I find I have no choice in the matter. It is simply who I am.”

“Wonderful!” Mrs. Stanton said enthusiastically. “That reality is what has propelled me forth, as well. There are many people who are offended by what I believe and say, but I find I can be nothing more or less than who I am.” She reached forward to grip Carrie’s hands. “Our country will demand much of you, if you’re willing to serve. There are many women who are quite powerful if they have someone just a bit more powerful to lead them.” She paused, staring deeply into Carrie’s eyes. “May I say something to you, Carrie?”

Carrie nodded, drawn into the depths of Mrs. Stanton’s eyes. “Of course,” she replied, somehow knowing what she was about to hear would change the course of her life. The knowledge both frightened and thrilled her.

“You are going to be a fine doctor, Carrie Borden, but that will just be the first step for you. You are one of the rare individuals who have the courage to go against everything others may believe is right if you don’t believe it is right for you. Women are going to look to you. They are going to depend on you. They are going to
need
you,” Mrs. Stanton said firmly. “You will perhaps pay a heavy price if you decide to be the woman they will need you to be, but I can tell you from personal experience that the rewards far outweigh the cost.”

Carrie gazed at her, trying to absorb the import of her words. “I’m not sure what to say,” she finally murmured.

Mrs. Stanton threw her head back with a cheerful laugh. “Of course you don’t. How in the world
could
you? You just tuck what I’ve told you away in your heart and mind. You’ll know the very moment it makes sense to you.” She turned suddenly, her attention drawn by a call from the side of the room. “You’ll have to excuse me now. The meeting will be starting soon. I’m needed up front.” She turned and sailed away.

Carrie and Janie stared at each other for a long moment. Janie was the first to speak. “I could leave right this moment and have everything I came for.”

Carrie nodded, her mind still swirling from what Mrs. Stanton had said. She supposed she should feel flattered by Mrs. Stanton’s words, but instead she felt the beginning of a bubbling resentment.

Abby laughed and pulled Carrie’s arm through her own. “One of the things I love about you, darling daughter, is that your face is so easy to read.”

Carrie blinked. “It is?”

Abby laughed harder. “You’re not at all sure you want to aspire to the things Elizabeth told you, and you’re struggling with resentment.”

Carrie sighed. “There truly are times I wish you didn’t know me so well.” Even as she said the words, she knew they weren’t true.

“No, you don’t,” Abby said confidently, continuing on in a much gentler tone. “But don’t worry, I’ll not say another word about Elizabeth’s rather startling prediction. What the future holds for you is for no one else to determine but you.”

“It
was
quite a lot to take in,” Janie said almost apologetically. “Is it all right to admit I’m glad she didn’t say those things to me, oh mighty one?”

Carrie laughed, resisting the urge to stick her tongue out only because there were so many peers who would witness her childish behavior. And besides, the future was the future, and today was today. All she had to do
today
was sit in the audience and learn from the speakers. As she settled into her seat between Abby and Janie, she also admitted there was a part of her that hoped Mrs. Stanton had been right. In spite of a bubbling fear, she also felt an emerging desire to be at the forefront of a movement that would give freedom to women all across the country. Now she just had to work on becoming a woman who deserved to be listened to.

The day spun past as a parade of people she had only heard about spoke. Susan B. Anthony, Lucretia Mott, Wendell Phillips, Anna Dickinson, and others inspired and challenged every person in the room. These were the people who had first led the fight to free the slaves. Now they were turning their passion to equal rights for both blacks and women.

Abby grew more troubled as she listened to the speakers and talked to women in between sessions. This was the first convention since before the war. So much had happened, and now it must all be resolved and fit together. Most of the people in the room had been closely identified with the anti-slavery movement. The war was over and the slaves were now free, but the battle for equal rights for blacks was just as necessary as it was for women. She knew there were many people in the room who felt it was necessary to put aside the fight for women’s right to vote until blacks had been franchised.

During one of the breaks, Carrie found Abby standing outside on the porch staring into the distance. “What’s wrong?” she asked quietly.

Abby struggled to find words for her feelings. “I fought so hard for blacks to be free, and I was happy to put the women’s rights movement on hold during the war, but I find I’m not willing to do that any longer. I want blacks to have the right to vote, but I believe it’s equally important that women get the vote.” She took a deep breath. “I’m trying to decide if that makes me selfish.”

“There is not a selfish bone in your body,” Carrie replied.

Abby shook her head. “I wish that were true, Carrie, but I’m just human. I’m doing my best to see this clearly, but it seems to be a muddy mess. The riots in Memphis make me question my own feelings around this issue. Do I have the right to insist on equal rights for women when blacks are in such dire straits?”

Carrie cocked her head, thinking about everything she had heard that day. “Would blacks having the right to vote really stop the violence? Would it have stopped the riot in Memphis?” she asked. Before Abby could answer, she asked another one. “Are men really so threatened by women having the right to vote that they would block the black vote to make sure we didn’t get it?” Her tone was disbelieving.

Abby sighed. “I’m afraid that may be true,” she said bluntly.

“Why?” Carrie asked in astonishment.

Abby sighed again. “I wish it were a simple explanation.” She gazed across the street, trying to find comfort in the bed of bright flowers swaying in the breeze, but her insides continued to churn. “To fully explain it would take all day, but at the core is the belief that a woman’s place is in the home and that politics is a dirty business that soils the pristine persona of the female,” she answered, not bothering to hide the disgust in her voice.

“Nonsense!” Carrie retorted. “I heard that same argument during the war when I was working at Chimborazo.” Scorn rippled in her voice. “Men are such idiots.”

Abby smiled slightly. “I wish it was only men,” she said heavily. “There are women who believe the same thing.”

Carrie stared at her. “Excuse me?”

Abby knew Carrie needed to be aware of the truth. “There is a large number of
women
who hate what we are doing. They believe women are biologically destined to be child bearers and homemakers. They also believe we are going against the laws of nature if we enter politics and shake up the status quo.”

Carrie groped for words, the silence stretching out. “You’re serious,” she finally murmured.

Abby nodded. “I sincerely wish I wasn’t, but I am.”

“I don’t even know what to say,” Carrie admitted. “What do they say to a woman like Mrs. Stanton who has accomplished all she has
while
raising seven children?”

“They would say she should have been content with raising her children and that any time she spent away from home or diverted from her life as a wife and mother was time ill-spent.”

“So there are
women
in this country who believe my desire to be a doctor is wrong?”

Abby smiled gently. “Less than a week ago
you
were struggling with your decision to leave Robert,” she reminded her. “Carrie, don’t judge other women too harshly. I completely disagree with them, but I recognize fear is a powerful force. It’s also true that centuries of being programmed to be a certain way, to believe a certain way, is very difficult to cast aside. The very idea of doing so makes you afraid you’ll no longer know who you are if you’re not what you have always believed yourself to be. There are many women who are more than content to simply go on as they always have because they’re comfortable in knowing what is expected of them. They view our efforts as a threat to what they have always known.”

“The right to vote? The right to make choices for our own lives?” Carrie asked. “How can that be a bad thing?”

Their conversation was interrupted by a call from the church door. “The next speaker is starting,” Abby said quickly, ashamed to realize she was relieved that she wouldn’t have to answer Carrie’s question. At the same time, she understood their conversation had also made her own thoughts clear. She would fight for equal rights for blacks, but it would be a fight for equal rights for
all
blacks, both male and female.

After many hours of speeches and conversation, Elizabeth Cady Stanton stepped to the podium and read from a notebook in front of her.

As the same persons have been identified with the Anti-slavery and Woman's Rights Societies, and as by the Proclamation of Emancipation the colored man is now a freeman, and a citizen; and as bills are pending in Congress to secure him in the right of suffrage, the same right women were demanding, it is proposed to merge the societies into one, under the name of "The American Equal Rights Association,” that the same conventions, appeals, and petitions might include both classes of disfranchised citizens.

Carrie felt a surge of excitement when she realized her presence at the convention gave her the right to have a say in the decision. She was disconcerted the proposition did not meet with unanimous approval but thrilled when it received the approval of a majority of those present. Her commitment to become a doctor was not diminished, but she also fully embraced the belief that women’s voices should be heard through the vote. The new association would fight for black rights, but it would also continue to fight for women’s rights.