Godforsaken: Book 1 (Shade of Light) (7 page)

Lily’s eyes stared ahead
at the poster on the front wall, but she saw nothing of it. Her
mind was still glued to the dream – and to
the angel
. It seemed as though the
strange man wasn't going to leave her anytime soon.

“Are you ready in there?” Nancy’s sweet
voice pulled her out from the dream.

Lily blinked, calming, the reality of the
world around her coming into focus.

“Lily? Are you up yet?” Nancy’s voice
sounded worried now.

“No, I’ll be out in a minute,” Lily said
drowsily.

“Hurry up.”

Lily covered her face with her hands and
sighed. The events of yesterday flooded back to her. She remembered
dancing in the club, kissing the stranger in the car, then crying
in Nancy’s arms for over half of the night. That’s why her eyes
were red and bloodshot and longed for sleep, but the new day
studying had begun, and there was no more time for resting. With
that, Lily forced herself out of bed.

* * *

Lily and Nancy exchanged only several words
on their trip to college before Nancy decided to leave her friend
alone with her thoughts. Lily looked exhausted, her blonde hair
hung limp over her shoulders. If Nancy wasn’t with her, she would
have passed her station and gone on to the last one without
realizing it.

“Have a nice day,” Nancy said at the
entrance of the college before walking away to her class.

Lily gazed after her until she disappeared
around the corner. Sighing, she took the stairs.

Throughout her classes Lily couldn’t
concentrate at all. She stared at the raindrops running down the
window and relived all the feelings she had felt the previous
night. One thing she did understand: she should forget about the
stranger. But that was an impossible task. The man from the club
had kept her soul even when she had left him, and now, he had
vanished, leaving her with only her painful memories.

Lily went to lunch and saw Nancy standing at
the entrance waiting for her. She exhaled anxiously, but forced a
broad smile as Lily approached.

“Hey,” Nancy called out to Lily with a
forced chipperness, “You’re here.”

Lily just nodded in reply.

“Let’s go have something to eat, shall we?”
Nancy asked.

“Yeah, of course,” Lily said quietly, and
made her way toward the exit.

Nancy followed her in silence.

They got out into the fresh and chilly air.
The sky was still covered by gloomy clouds as the heavy rain
continued, but Lily didn’t mind walking into it. Raindrops found
her blonde hair instantly. Nancy caught up to her and opened the
umbrella. Holding it above them both, she and Lily walked across
the courtyard in silence.

The courtyard was almost empty. Lily could
see several students with umbrellas coming toward them, and one guy
even ran by holding a paper bag above his head.

“Where is Mike?” Lily broke the silence.
“Shouldn’t you meet him for lunch?”

“He’ll catch up with us in the café,” Nancy
relied. “I thought you wouldn’t want him to join us.”

“I’m not sick, Nancy,” Lily said
grumpily.

“But you're not feeling so good, so I just
thought–”

“Just drop it,” Lily put in sharply.

The café was crowded, and it took a while to
find a free table near the TV. Lily avoided Nancy’s eyes while they
were waiting for a waitress.

“Just a coffee,” Lily told the waitress and
stared at the TV.

“Aren’t you hungry?” Nancy asked with a
surprised voice.

“No.”

“You should eat something, Lily,” Nancy
insisted. “What’s going on with you? I told you, don't let yourself
get hung up on–”

“It’s not about him,” Lily cut her off
stiffly. “I’m just not hungry.” She looked up at the black-haired,
eager waitress and said confidently, “Really, just a cup of warm
coffee.” The waitress nodded and walked away.

Lily laced her fingers together, looking
after the waitress and then at the TV as though Nancy wasn't even
present. Nancy regarded her with a severe look, narrowing her
eyes.

“How were your classes?” Nancy asked.

“Fucked up,” Lily mouthed at her. “How were
yours?”

“Something like that,” Nancy replied with a
grin, but her friend didn’t respond in kind. She sighed. “Don’t you
want to talk about him?”

Finally, she got Lily to look at her. Lily's
eyes became wider than usual, and Nancy recognized a kind of fear
in them.

“What did we drink yesterday?” Lily asked
abruptly.

“Why do you ask?”

Lily exhaled, tilting her head down. “It
might seem crazy, but the first time I saw him I saw a pair of
wings on his back.” Her voice sounded incredulous even to her. She
felt a flutter in her stomach.

“What?” Nancy's eyes widened, and she looked
hard at Lilt for some seconds. “What do you mean, you saw wings?
Like an angel's?”

“Yeah,” Lily shrugged and pursed her lips.
Her right hand trembled nervously and she pulled it back, hiding it
under the table. “I saw him standing upstairs. He looked down at me
and then there were two gray wings on his back.”

“A hallucination?” Nancy put in, still
wearing a distinctly astonished look.

“It has to have been. How could anybody have
wings? What do you think?”

“Of course he couldn't have had them,” Nancy
choked and pulled herself together quickly. “You were probably
drunk.”

“Yes, I was,” Lily responded, “but only
until I saw him.”

“Lily, you don’t think you actually met an
angel or something, do you?” Nancy sounded shocked. Her hand
crawled over the table to meet Lily's.

“I don’t know. I thought it was because of
the alcohol at first, I really did,” Lily replied, averting her
eyes. She looked over at the TV instead. “But the feelings he
awakened in me...Nobody ever made me feel like that before.”

“Lily, stop it. You’re just imagining
things, Mike and I couldn't see anything like that–”

“But maybe it works only on me,” Lily
wondered aloud.

“What?” Nancy leaned back against the chair
and stared at her friend, wholly taken aback. “Are you out of your
mind?” She sniffed waspishly. “Lily, you're getting carried away.
Angels only exist in books, not in the real world. I think you're
overthinking the situation, that’s all. This is real life, not a
bizarre fantasy book. You just need to move on.”

“Yeah, well, I tried to do that yesterday,”
Lily remarked curtly, before she buried her gaze in the TV
again.

“You know,” Nancy began slowly, “just think
about what this situation looks like from my side, okay?” She
waited for Lily to say something back, but the latter continued
staring on the TV. “Lily, you just had a little fun with a cute
guy. It's the kind of thing I used to do all the time before I met
Mike. Are you listening to me?” Nancy’s voice sounded angry
now.

“Look,” Lily shushed her and pointed at the
TV.

Nancy looked, and her jaw dropped as she saw
the man on the TV. It was his – the stranger’s from the club –
picture on the lunch time news.

“
Samael Eden, the director of one of the biggest
transportation firms in the country, has dissolved his agreement
with the Russian magnate Vitali Ivanov
,”
announced a blonde-haired news woman. Then there was footage of
Samael climbing down the stairs of his firm. A lot of journalists
with microphones and cameras ran to meet him, but Samael refused to
answer any of their questions.

Lily didn’t listen to what the news woman
was saying about one of the richest young men in the world. All she
could focus on were those incredible green eyes that had so
enthralled her last night. Again an inexplicable feeling arose
inside her, and she yearned to be locked in his warm arms and to
have his lips on hers. The feeling lasted less than two seconds and
dissolved quickly.

“Oh, bingo,” the words escaped Nancy’s mouth
instinctively, catching Lily’s attention. She frowned at her
friend. “At least, we know he’s a human now,” Nancy teased. “Samael
Eden,” she went on, now looking at Lily. “That's a strange name,
don’t you think?”

“What was his name?” Lily asked. She felt
her stomach clench.

“Samael Eden,” Nancy said, and crossed her
legs. “Did you hear who he was?”

“I don’t think I did,” Lily stammered, her
fingers began trembling again.

“Come back to earth, baby,” Nancy jabbed
Lily’s arm. “His name is Samael Eden. Did he mention it at all when
you met?”

“No,” Lily murmured. “He just talked about
taking me home, that’s all.”

“But are you sure this is the same guy?”

“Positive,” she agreed.

“What was such a rich guy doing in the club,
then?” Nancy asked pensively.

That moment the waitress came up, setting
Lily’s coffee and Nancy’s lunch on the table.

“Thank you,” Nancy said.

Lily reached for the cup and took a sip of
warm coffee, still wandering somewhere in her memories.

“Do you remember his car? What kind of make
was it?” Nancy interrupted her.

“I don’t know,” Lily replied, still
preoccupied. “I don't know much about cars, but it seemed very
expensive.”

“Then it must've been him, no doubt.”

The door of the café swung open, and Mike
slid in wearing a happy expression. He looked around and saw the
girls in the corner. As he approached them there was a big smile on
his face.

“Hey, girls,” he burst out, bending forward
to kiss Nancy on the lips.

“Mike,” Nancy said. “You’re late. Sit.”

Mike sat down beside her and looked from her
to Lily. “Are you okay, sweetheart?”

“Yeah,” Lily said in an undertone, although
in truth she was far from okay.

“Mike,” Nancy spoke. “Do you know that guy
from the club?”

“That one Lily was dancing with?” Mike
specified.

“Yeah.”

“As far as I know, he was the owner.” His
questioning eyes flew from one girl to the other. “At least, that's
what Alen told me. He was really upset seeing Lily with him
yesterday.”

“We don’t give a shit about how Alen felt,”
Nancy put in sharply instead of Lily. She knew her friend would say
the same. “You know that he’s – the owner's – the head of one of
the biggest transportation firms in the USA?”

“Really?” Mike said in surprise. “Good shot,
Lily,” he joked. Nobody laughed. Mike cleared his throat and gawked
around.

“How do you know that?” He asked after a
minute.

“He was on the news,” Nancy informed, her
mouth full of sandwich.

“You haven't seen him today, right, Lily?”
Mike asked her.

Lily sighed, and looked at Mike’s worried
face. “No, and I doubt I will. He doesn’t even know who I am.”

“With the money he has, it wouldn’t hard for
him to find you,” Mike supposed, turning to the waitress.

“He'll only try to find me if he wants me,”
Lily added rapidly.

“I think he’s right,” Nancy said to Lily
while Mike was occupied in talking to the waitress. “If he wants,
he can search around for you easily.”

“But I’m not sure I want to see him again,”
Lily thought aloud, taking a sip of her coffee. Was that what her
heart wanted?

Now that Mike was here, Nancy finally quit
questioning Lily about the mysterious man, but even that new
silence didn’t help Lily to stop thinking about him. Suddenly, the
stranger of the club had become a part of everything she saw, and
everywhere she looked at she saw two green eyes hung in
mid-air.

The lunch was over in thirty minutes. Lily,
Nancy, and Mike walked out of the café. It was still raining. Mike
held the door for her, then he took the umbrella from Nancy and
opened it.

“Hurry up, Mike,” Nancy cried out,
protecting her face with both hands from the little raindrops
falling through the air.

Lily heard her friend complaining and Mike
laughing, but her attention was attracted by a tall man standing on
the opposite of the street. The stranger’s eyes were fixed on Lily
as if he knew her. He wore a long black coat, and an equally black
hat. He wasn't carrying an umbrella, and seemed not to mind getting
wet. His hands thrust in his coat pockets, the stranger kept on
staring at Lily, still as a statue.

“Here we are, baby,” Mike held the umbrella
above Nancy’s head, then peered back at Lily, “Come along. You’ll
get drenched. Hey, Lily.”

Lily jerked and turned her eyes away from
the man in black. Mike smiled at her, pulling her close under the
umbrella.

“Wake up, baby,” he whispered in Lily’s ear.
“What are you looking at?”

Without waiting for an answer, Mike looked
in the same direction as Lily was, but the strange man dressed in
all black had already gone. One second was enough for him to
disappear from Lily’s sight.

“What’s up?” Mike questioned.

“Nothing,” Lily shook her head.

“Are you sure?” Nancy put in. “You look
scared.”

“Oh no, I’m just tired,” Lily answered
rapidly. “I just thought I saw a man I knew, but I was
mistaken.”

“Who?” Mike asked curiously. “I didn’t see
anybody there.”

“He disappeared as soon as you looked,” Lily
sighed and glanced at Nancy. “Shall we go?”

“Yeah,” Nancy replied, looking just as
curious as Mike.

Lily woke up in the morning with the skin
beneath her blue eyes swollen and red, as though she hadn’t slept
at all. She would have been happy to stay awake the whole night if
that meant she could free herself from the unending, agonizing
dreams about Samael.

Why had the dreams about Samael replaced the
ones she had used to have the last two years? She missed the dreams
about the handsome, black-haired man, all clad in white, the one
who had taken her hand and offered to take her to a heavenly
beautiful place.