Gone By (9 page)

“Yeah ! for sure”.

Five

....................

So, we started to walk back to the ground floor through the aisle of rack. She led first through the stair way down and I followed her behind. Isha thought of borrowing the book for days. It was a huge volume almost weighing more than a kilo. Somehow I could see Isha handling it’s weight. “Give me, let me hold it” I politely implored her to offer me to let her feel the lightness.

We stood in a queue together along with other people for registering the borrowing days. I asked her to take the chair that laid empty few meters away from the queue. Instead I would toil the work for her. She looked little exhausted and covered with dryness on her face. And I stood in a queue waiting for my turn for the registration. She glared at me. At some points she widened to smile. So I accompanied her through some gestures from my point of position. She smiled and gestured me back with some action through her hands. Her gestures went unknown out of my head. For long we continued to talk through gestures as the library forbade our loud voice. Finally, my long waiting turn came before me. I had to write down some formalities filling up a form. Some charges were put into action for the number of borrowing days. So, I did paid the cost of charge. Isha wanted to borrow the book for a month, since her trip to India was for sure a long one. After processing all those formalities finally the book is now under our custody.  I walked off towards Isha where she remained seated.

“So, you got it done” she smiled.

“Yeah” said I casually.

I handed her the book to glance out once. She flipped out one last time some pages to look out for any fault.

“I thought of shifting to Goa tonight” she captioned her voice suddenly.

“What”.

“Yeah....what do you say”.

We were heading outside. She pushed the glass door outward and stepped out. I took her prints to follow out. Finally, we were out of the huge mansion library, stood protected under the entrance roof from the extreme heat of the sun.

“Are you sure you’re shifting to Goa today” my voice fumbled.

“Thinking so”.

I stood with rays of dejection now. No idea about the reason ,is it Isha’s decisive plan of moving to Goa or the detachment of bond that would create with void all over again in my life. I stood humble and silent with less frequency of my breath.

“What’s wrong” she inquired with concern.

We followed to walk and our steps added together. “Nothing” with my casual notation.

“Are you going to come with me”.

“Where?” I sought to know.

“ What..where..Goa”.

How would I say no to her, that’s the impossible thing I couldn’t do. I firmly agreed with contentment within myself.

“Surely”.

“But under one condition”.

“Now what” I demanded.

“You got to tell me about Anannya”.

“Agreed to it” nodding my head.

“Your Novel will be complete in Goa”.

“Wow!!! That’s amazing” I shrugged with glamour on my face.

“So where we are on now”  Isha intended to know.

“Perhaps we should turn back to hotel for packing up. It’s almost 3:00pm”.

“Perfect we should leave for hotel” said Isha.

We walked little faster to catch a taxi to turn back to hotel. In my hand I had the book with its weight pounding on my grip and it’s thickness of pages that volume from page one till end. It was really hard to gather a strength holding in one hand for long which weighted for more than a kilo. One could obviously say the book contained the head of philosophers and researchers. Isha volubly protested “Wait” pointing her hand towards a running taxi. But, unfortunately her protest went in vain. The taxi instead ran faster with no demand on us. We were still walking through the subway.

“So, what you plan in Goa” I asked her intently.

“Well, firstly.... I shall visit the church where I’m suppose to offer the marble statue and I look forward for my thesis and your story”.

“That’s great idea” said I with an applauding tone.

“So, basically you’re going to spent the most number of days in Goa” I muttered.

“Yeah....So is you with me” her voice sounded cheerful.

Yet our steps moved on, trying to negotiate with our conversation that followed endlessly with no intention of stopping a cab instead lengthening the time. Lastly we halted at a spot, finally tracking for a taxi. Did not bother to carry on to walk to taxi stand, instead in the mid way one could stop for a taxi ride.

“Why you denied talking about Anannya” Isha squinted.

“Please don’t stress me on spurting out the poisons of lost love”.

“Well, just chill”  she said softly.

I waved my hand on one taxi that rushed before us, but went unnoticed.

“Hey..taxi” she shouted on top of her voice where there stood an ideal taxi few meters ahead of us. The driver paid the call of attention and parked before us. I opened the door for her, she comfortably settled herself and I joined her holding the heavy weighted book in my hand. I directed the address of our final spot to the driver. We accelerated with constant speed.

“So, are you excited with you thesis” my voice squished.

“Yeah!..not only that but with your love tale too” she smiled with her eye brow raised high.

She wriggled herself to adjust her hair that kept flipping due to the effect of motion.

“Are you sure you are going to write up my story” my tone feeble out.

“You will narrate it that’s it” said Isha.

“Well..I should look out for new change”.

“That’s what I meant to say...since I met you” her voice sounded husky.

“Yeah!”.

“Do you think she still loves you?” Isha puts a question mark before me.

“I guess not....perhaps she found a better hunk by now”.

Isha gestured her head and burst into smile.

“What’s the best thing you liked about Anannya” she crackled deep to know.

“I must say she was very diligent, caring ,loving etc”.

Isha rolled her eyes on me. “Did she ever loved you truly”.

Now my eyes saddened to answer neither my voice hissed out nor did I felt to reply back. There occurred paleness on my face driven by the darkness with blissful of sorrow and renting thoughts that squeezed underneath my heart. Isha pretended to peek at me. She got that intention on my face and avoided asking further. The air of silence hovered around between us for a while. Until we could see the tall building approaching nearer to us. The hotel building exclusively painted in white that shone brightly under the rays of densely heated sun. The taxi finally braked it’s wheel before the hotel entrance. Isha helped herself to get out of the car. So was I opened the door for me from the other side. She was still silent and my words broken. We proceeded with our steps together. I could sense she wanted to say something. I emerged out of silence to voice out “When shall we get going” I whispered softly.

She blinked her eyes in shallow expression, lingered at me “I shall call you” her voice softened out.

We walked through the elevator side. We were too much prim and proper with our gestures of talk.

“Are you ok” she asked as we waited together for the elevator to slid down before us.

“Yeah...I’m absolutely fine”.

“Did you mind asking about her”.

“No..It’s ok”.

She swept her face and put a smile to get looked charm. I slightly brim my face with slow expression of joy and smile to flourish out. The elevator halted before us. We gathered to step in together. This time I took the chance to press the floor button of her floor. The scene floated before my eyes that once occurred in the same elevator. But this time we both tried to console the inner demons and stayed protected from being getting closer to each other. The elevator stopped at her level floor. I avoided to drop till her door. She walked out handing me a salute of goodbye for a while. I immediately slid higher up to my floor. The sliding door of the elevator slid side wards spacing a way out as it halted on my floor. I grabbed my foot to walk out with tendency of speeding up my steps. The locked door opened with the key. And my motion followed. I didn’t realize to hand over the book carrying in my hand. Tentatively I placed it on the table. The watch ticked to be 4:00pm. And I stood restless with the sort of things blocking my mind. So much deeply lost into the fusion of Anannya’s love that I couldn’t put a wait state on my mind without a single day thinking about her. Besides Isha overlapping the controversial conflict on my mind. I could say I love Anannya but not Isha. I laid stable on my bed with my head slightly lowered down focusing the deep vision of my eyes into the floor that screened before me. I have decided to spent a weekend with Isha, was it my fate or the luck that carried me. I couldn’t be more impulsive now then what I was earlier. Indeed, my every thoughts whispered out just one name Anannya.

“There was nothing impure feelings I had about Isha but what troubled me was my magnetic attachment with Anannya” my subconscious revealed at me.

How do I get over to this dilemma of pain and conflict which I had been bearing with strong emotions and fearful obscenity. At a sudden, the phone starts to ring up. My head turned to look upon from the posture I was in. I managed to pick up the receiver from that level. I was seated at the corner edge of my bed. The wire elongated into few centimetres from the dialler box of the telephone until it reached to my ear level.

“Hello” I whispered softly.

“Hey...get ready and pack your things up” her voice sounded husky.

It was Isha preparing for the journey to Goa. She demanded me to obey her rules and be with her like the shadow of her life.

“Does She liked me a lot” my subconscious suppressed me.

Even if it would be, my heart wouldn’t space for her since I had the long term wish for Anannya. “Yeah!!!” with my casual tone.

“What’s wrong....are you okay”.

“Yeah! I’m fine”.

“No..you’re worried about something. I’m coming up to you” she hanged up the phone.

For I knew she was very much induced up to visit Goa. Still now there was something missing in me which desperately I needed. I never knew what was it rather I let it flow with no obligations on my mind. A minutes later, there’s a knock at my door. Isha had swiftly raised to my room now. I took up the toil to open the door for her. She was ready with all her belongings yet I was still unpacked.

“Why do you think so much about her” she squirmed.

“That’s because I love her”.

“C’mon now pack up the things we got to move out soon” she handed me my journey bag. “Look...I can understand the inner erupting emotions and feelings, the trauma of pain and suffering you’re going through but you can’t get what is gone” with her consolidated tone.

I sighed “I do know that”.

“You got to move on with your life...She knows that you love her still”.

With that peak of short conversation finally I was done with my packing things up.

“Well...do you know anything about Goa” Isha grinned.

“A little knowledge about the place”. I answered. She smiled.

“I don’t want to see you demoralised next time” Isha flattered her voice firmly. She peeked at me with serious concern.

“Alright”.

“Put a smile at your face now” she suggested me with ray of joy in her eyes.

“So crazy about Anannya” she giggled.

“Well, since I saw her the first time”.

“Hmmm!!!” she grunted.

Six

..............

We were ready with our belongings. All we needed was to leave now. We walked out together from my room. There the elevator stood empty. Nothing big baggage I had but a sporty look alike bag which I carried on my back. And the heavily weighted book on my hand. It added to my weight with my feet grasping hard onto the ground. Whereas Isha on the other hand carried a trolley alike bag that had wheels to roll on the ground. She looked superfine holding that wheel bag and the fine movement through the wheel it rolled. We came closer to the elevator, it laid empty. We strolled in with the bag and baggage.

“So, where do we move now” as she pressed the lower floor button of the elevator key pad. “Well, we’ll take a Volvo”.

The elevator slid swiftly down crossing every floor with no call of stoppage. Her perfume smell covered the area under her influence. Every breath I took in, felt the smell of an air turned into her smell of perfume indeed some sort of addictive drug it was. As the elevator slid there were no room for words inside me instead my breath got lengthen out. Isha at some point peeked her eyes, passed a smile that seemed similar to please someone. The elevator finally halted at the lowest floor. The door smoothly slid to open up. As it opened up, we could see mass of people gathering around before the halted elevator. Some rushed in to occupy space for themselves. Somehow we managed to pull ourselves out of its rushing crowd and marched towards the reception for final transaction. We had a clear cut view point with the hotel manager and paid the necessary amount. The keys of the room were handed over to them. She looked very appropriate with her dressing which went matching according to her nature. We began our steps together that led us to the glass door of the entrance. The door guard stood outside, pulled outward to allow a room for us to exit. Isha followed out first and I took her way. We halted a little thinking about the management how should we proceed.