Good Morning from Paradise (5 page)

Friday 14
^th
June,

Hi Diary,

Well after a couple of days of doing so I
have decided that waking up next to this beautiful man is the best way to start
the day. I don’t care what the day brings as long as I fall into bed with him
tonight. It might sound needy but while we’re here I don’t mind being needy.
I’ll face my issues when reality hits back home, until then I’m going to enjoy
as much of him as I can and boy does he have plenty to enjoy!!

Ella xx

Brit
had me busy helping with the guests that were arriving while she sorted last
minute things out with the party planner. Dan occupied any free time I had and
I was loving the attention and the connection. It was all running pretty
smoothly until Daddy Big Bucks arrived.

Daddy
Big Bucks liked three things in life. Control, money and women. Not sure if
control and money would come in that order of priority but I was sure that his
love of women didn’t quite extend to his beautiful daughter, maybe because most
of his women were Brits age and having a daughter the same age as his fuck
buddy reminded him what a dirty pervert he was, maybe he was just a dick.
Anyway, he and Brits mother had separated after she got tired of his endless
stream of women, he cut her off completely, left her with nothing and in the
end she hung herself. Daddy Big Bucks payed a lot of hush money to keep the
story out of the press and it had worked. Brit wasn’t old enough to remember
her very well and had spent her childhood years with various nannies. Maybe she
reminded him of the wrong he had done and that’s why he hardly saw her. Brit
never thought he would come to her party yet here he was with his latest money
hungry bimbo hanging off his arm.  As he walked into reception Dan and I
were helping the latest arrivals to get checked in and find their way around.
Dan looked like he’d been slapped, the colour instantly drained from him.

 “What’s
wrong Dan? You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.” I reached up and touched
his cheek.

“‘Ella,
see the girl with Jonathan?” he asked.

“Yeah”
I replied taking her in, she was young, slim, blond and very beautiful.

“That’s
Rachael. My ex.” Fuck! I felt sick, not only was I about to come face to face
with my new ‘boyfriends’ ex but she was dating my best friends’ dad! As they
approached I tried to take my hand out of Dan’s but he held on tight.

“Ella
Bella!” Daddy Big Bucks always greeted me in the same way, like he had known me
forever and actually liked me.

“Where
is my beautiful daughter?” He scanned the area for Brit.

“Hello
Jonathan, nice to see you again” I lied. “Brit is in the events hall with the
Party Planner tying up some last minute loose ends.” He didn’t introduce his
lady friend he just turned and whispered something to her and a huge smile
spread over her face as she pecked him on the cheek and left. I looked at Dan
and was a little disappointed to see his eyes follow her as she moved away.
Daddy Big Bucks seemed blissfully unaware that he was standing next to the man
he had stolen his newest play thing from, either that or he didn’t care.

“Daniel.
Nice to see you again, son.” Jonathan offered his hand for Dan to shake.

“You
too Jonathan” Dan shook his hand. The tension was palpable until Daddy Big Bucks
turned away. He went off in search for Brit, Dan and I showed the new arrivals
to their accommodation and headed for the beach. I found a spot and settled on
the sand, Dan sat behind me, his legs either side and his hands out behind him
taking his weight. I leaned back onto him and he kissed the top of my head.

“You
ok?” I asked him. “I guess that was quite a shock?” his head fell back and he
took a deep breath of warm ocean air.

“I
kind of expected it to be honest. I know now that I didn’t love her in the end.
You taught me that Ella” he sat up and wrapped his arms around me.

“I
taught you that?” I questioned him.

“Yeah,
when I met you I realised that I couldn’t have loved her. I knew when that guy
had you pinned in the bar that I would risk anything to keep you safe, I’d give
you anything to keep you happy, to keep you with me. I never felt like that for
her, you know? I’ve never felt like that before.” Wow, I had no idea his
feelings were so strong.

“I
don’t need anything from you to be happy, just you, I’m happy just like this.”
We sat like that for a while, not saying much, just holding each other. Any
worries about saying goodbye washed away when he said those words, I knew we
would carry on seeing each other, this was way more than a holiday romance.

Saturday 15
^th
June – Party Day

Hi Diary,

Well I guess I deserve the reality check that
came and kicked me in the teeth. I’ve been floating around in a daydream like
the world owed me a favour. Rachael shows up and I’m jolted back to life,
reminded that things aren’t all plain sailing. What the hell is she thinking
turning up here after she dumped him like that? How the hell could she leave
Dan for a dirty old git like Jonathan? I don’t class myself as perfect by any
stretch of the imagination but I could never be heartless and brazen enough to
do what she has done. Poor Dan looked shocked to the core even though he tried
to play it off like he had expected it. And me? Well, now I’m worried for all
kinds of reasons. What if seeing her again makes him realise he wants her back?
What if seeing her with someone else stirs jealousy and emotions he didn’t
think he still had? What if seeing him with someone else makes her realise how
stupid she’s been and come running back? What if…what if... I lose him? I can’t
bear to think about it. I know two things for certain. 1. It’s only been a week
but I am head over heels in love with him. 2. We’re in this together diary, you
and me. Whatever happens I’m going to need you to vent to.  Got to go and
get ready, I’ll keep you posted. Wish me luck.

Ella xx

The day of the party
started out like a fairy tale. I woke up in Dan’s arms after a long hot night
of reassurance sex, he was trying to prove that I meant more to him than she
did and he did a really good job. We spent the day on the beach, walking,
talking and just spending time together until it was time for the spa
appointment Brit had booked to give us a quick once over before getting ready.

After
the spa we went back to Brits hut and Amber, Brit and I had a few glasses of
champagne while we got ready for the night ahead. The excitement was at its’
peak, we all had butterflies in our stomach for different reasons. Amber was
looking forward to another evening with Kyle as I was with Dan. Brit was excited
about her first social event as a singleton and boy was she ready to mingle!!
The dresses were amazing. Amber was wearing a Vintage 1920’s Flapper girl
dress. It was silver with an intricate sequin overlay and a fringe around the
bottom. She wore silver sandals and long gloves and a matching head band that
looked fabulous against her dark curls which she had left loose. The jewellery
that she had bought on our shopping trip looked amazing with her outfit. My
dress was long, black, fitted to the knee with a flowing fringed skirt from the
knee to the floor. It too had an intricate sequin design in gold which included
a gold sequinned integrated belt around the waist. I had a thin gold band head
dress with a black feather attached and I wore my black strappy sandals which I
wasn’t overly fond of but it didn’t matter too much because the skirt was long
enough to cover my feet. Brits gown was fit for a queen. Again in the 1920’s
style it was gold to the knee with a sheer sequinned overlay that went all the
way down to the floor, she had gold shoes and a clasp in her hair that belonged
to her great grandmother. She looked absolutely stunning.

We
got to the hall before anyone arrived, perks of getting ready with the Birthday
girl. I took the opportunity to give Brit her gift. I had bought the shelled
box when I was shopping with Amber and just as I thought she would, Brit adored
it. Amber had bought Brit a gorgeous hand -made bracelet which she put on
immediately. She set our gift bags on the table near the cake as a hint to
others to leave gifts there for later. The hall looked perfect. It must have
taken days, and cost a fortune. And as if on cue Daddy Big Bucks and Rachael
arrived, his gift was the holiday and party so it shocked us all when he handed
Brit a gift box. Rachael mustn’t have gotten the Gatsby theme memo because she
came in the tiniest, tightest silver playsuit which left nothing to the
imagination and I started getting the sickly feeling again.  Amber, Brit
and I had discussed their relationship in detail, none of us holding back on
what we really thought even though Brits dad was half of that relationship.
Brit hated it, she was embarrassed by it. Guests started filtering in, all
looking fabulous, especially Dan. I thought he was irresistible in shorts and
polo -shirt, my good god it did things to my insides that I can’t describe
seeing him in a tux. I wanted to take him home and keep him away from the other
girls in here all eying him up. He found me instantly and made his way to my
side only stopping to put his gift on the table.

“Wow,
you look perfect! I can’t wait to unwrap you from that dress later.” He said
bending and kissing my neck.

“I
know exactly how you feel.” I said, looking him up and down.

The
night went off without too many dramas, the odd drink was thrown over the odd
guy who was acting like a dick but apart from that we drank, danced, laughed
and ate from the biggest buffet I had ever seen. It was an awesome party, Brit
looked so happy and I was glad she wasn’t missing Wil. The band announced that
Brit was going to blow out the candles and cut the cake so we all gathered
round. I noticed Rachael had made a beeline for Dan and took the music free
opportunity to drag him to one side to talk. I got caught up in Brits speech,
when I looked round they were gone.

“Ella,
Dan went outside with Rach.” Kyle rubbed my arm. “She had something to tell
him.” He looked around at Amber.

“I’m
sure they won’t be much longer. Do you want a drink?” Amber signalled to Kyle
and he went off to the bar. I gave them a while buy they didn’t come back.
Anxiety started to build. I made my way outside to see if I could find him.
They weren’t in the complex so I took my sandals off and walked along the beach
until I saw them. Rachael was pacing backwards and forwards, Dan was sitting on
the sand with his head in his hands. I stopped just out of sight but close
enough to hear their conversation. “I don’t believe you.” He snarled angrily at
her.

“I’m
not dating Jonathan, he’s just a friend. It can’t be anybody else Dan.” She was
crying. “Why would I lie to you?” she sobbed. He looked up at her.

“So
you left me to befriend an old guy and now you want me to take you back?” he
was shouting now.

“He
doesn’t want me because of this.” She shouted back. “He offered me money to get
rid of it but I can’t, I don’t want to, and any way it’s not his baby to kill,
it’s mine, yours, ours!”

My
blood ran cold. She was having his baby, Dan’s baby. I couldn’t breathe,
couldn’t take it in. I ran back to the hut, took my dress off and put my
running gear on, I needed to think, to get away. I ran in the opposite
direction, fast. I didn’t want to bump into anyone, see anyone, I needed to be
alone. I ran until I hit my wall hoping I could run away from it all.

I
had a bad feeling something was going to happen but I wasn’t expecting this. I
was coming to the end of the lit beach so I thought I better stay here for a
while, I looked at my phone, 3am. It would start to get light soon enough and
then I could keep running or go back. I didn’t know what to do. I noticed I had
twelve missed calls, some from Brit, some from Amber and some from Dan. I
started to cry when I saw his name light up on the screen now, he was calling
me. I realised I hadn’t told anyone I was going. I answered with the intention
of just letting them know I was safe.

“Hi”
his voice sounded strained, was he crying? “Where the hell are you Ella? You’ve
got us going out of our minds.” Anger? Was he angry at me?

“I’m
safe, just went for a run, needed to get away” my voice started to break.

“El…gorgeous
girl, I don’t want to do this over the phone, I need to see you.” he wasn’t
angry anymore. Well I was, he told me he hadn’t loved her, that their
relationship had been more of a friendship in the end but even I’m not naïve
enough to think that friendships create babies. He must have still been
attracted to her enough to fuck her. Either that or he was lying to me all
along just like Tom did. 

“Why
do you need to see me? You want to see me cry when you tell me it’s over, is
that it? You want to see me hurt when you tell me you’ve got to give her a shot
because she’s carrying your baby?” The line went quiet. I went to hang up.

“I
didn’t want this, didn’t ask for this. I’m so sorry gorgeous girl, I can’t turn
my back on my baby, my responsibilities.” He sighed.

“‘I
understand.” I said because I did. From the moment I knew she was pregnant I
knew he was going to leave me. I hung up and fell to the sand sobbing. It was
over. That was it. I didn’t know what to do, what could I do? His decision was
made and he had chosen her. I walked back to my hut and snuck in without anyone
noticing. It was still early and everyone was sleeping. I didn’t want to sleep,
my head hurt, my eyes hurt, my body hurt. I showered and lay on my bed until I
knew what I needed to do. I needed to go home.

Sunday 16
^th
June

Hi,

So yesterday I wrote a list of worries, her
being pregnant wasn’t on my list! Why is this happening? I feel empty and lost
and stupid. I can’t believe how much it hurts. I’ve only known him for a week
yet this pain in my chest is far worse than when Tom left. I hate this. Why
can’t I just be happy for a change, why can’t drama ruin someone else’s love
life and leave me alone? Why the hell did I let my guard down and fall so
quickly? Who knows. This is shit. What do I do now? I don’t know whether to
hide my true feelings and pretend I don’t feel as much as I do for him or to
show how cut up I am. I just want to go home. I need Bud cuddles. Take a deep
breath Ella, get on with the day…

Ella xx