Goodly Creatures: A Pride and Prejudice Deviation (56 page)

Longbourn
28 November

Be not alarmed, sir, on receiving this letter, by the apprehension of its containing any renewal of solicitation of monies, which were so disgusting to you in the past. I write without any intention of paining you, by dwelling on our past negotiations, which for the happiness of both cannot be too soon forgotten.

I am fully aware of the impropriety of writing to you, and struggled to determine whether to send this correspondence to you directly by post, or to go through my uncle and Mrs Reynolds. I have chosen selfishly to spare myself the curiosity and gossip of those here in Meryton who might see to whom the letter was addressed. Our ill-advised waltz is still the topic of much rumour and innuendo. I apologize for causing someone in your employ to wonder at my bold behaviour with regard you. Mrs Reynolds will soon be part of my family, and I have long considered her a friend. She is also one of the original conspirators, and I have taken the liberty of explaining to her that you and I had a disagreement while you were in Hertfordshire, which needs clarification. Your perusal of this letter is an imposition that I would have spared you, had not my character required it to be written and read. You must, therefore, pardon the freedom with which I demand your attention. Your feelings, I know, will bestow it unwillingly, but I demand of you that justice of which I know you capable.

This, sir, is a faithful narrative of every event regarding my knowledge of Mr Wickham; and if you do not absolutely reject it as false, you will, I hope acquit me henceforth of cruelty towards you by being in league with that man.

My first knowledge of Mr Wickham came from my sister, Lydia. She met him while visiting Mrs Forster at the militia camp. In the course of relating the particulars of the ball to be held at Netherfield, Mr Wickham heard of your residence at that estate. Lydia observed some apprehension toward you, and even more discomfort was noticed when it was mentioned that your cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, was a friend of Colonel Forster. He did volunteer that you, the colonel and his brother, the Viscount Wolfbridge, had been friends as boys. Lydia believed him proud of his continued close friendship with the Viscount. She also noticed that several times during the conversation, he made me the object of his inquiries, and determined he was a fortune hunter.

Her urgency in informing me was appreciated, but my anxiety was increased with the knowledge of such a man being in the neighbourhood. Much of my inability to sleep is the result of dread that your cousin will expose my shame to the world. The reputation of my family, and particularly of my sisters, might not survive such a scandal. My other concern, and I am sure it generates little sympathy with you, is that I feared a scheme on the part of Mr Wickham and Lord Wolfbridge to force me to give them my ’ill gotten gains,’ as you would call it, in exchange for silence. My apprehension required me to spend time with Mr Wickham at a party at my aunt and uncle’s home. I found nothing to corroborate my theory, but instead was told how you had denied him a valuable living that was the bequest of your father. I believed not one word of his sad tale. He had barely made my acquaintance before he was maligning your character.

I allowed Mr Wickham to kiss my hand in order to perpetuate the impression that he had charmed me… you caught me in the act of deceiving a deceiver. My father once told me of an ancient Chinese general who said, “all warfare is deception.” I have long considered my attempts to protect my family to be a form of warfare. It was in that interest that I barely spoke to Mrs Younge during my journey to London. I had thought your reasons for hiring her foolish. In my mind, she was a dangerous link to the Darcy family. I had forgotten all about her until you accused me of conspiring with her that last morning. My actions in this never ending battle seem to have once again brought down your scorn on my character. It was my intention to tell you of Wickham’s assault on your good name the night of the ball.

You are mistaken that I do not know your sister. I made her acquaintance in the bookshop in Lambton the day she was retrieving the Perrault books you had ordered. That was shortly before my final confinement at Pemberley, and Dr Wilder introduced me as his cousin. She was delightful, and very excited about the birth of your first child. I knew at that moment, she would be a wonderful aunt. Mr Wickham proclaimed Miss Darcy proud, and in that instant, I knew all his statements to be false. Dr Wilder and Mrs Reynolds have always related the highest regard for Miss Darcy in their correspondence to me. The way Wickham looked when he talked of her made me fear for her safety, and became a most important motive for this correspondence. Your good opinion of me is much less important than making amends for past transgressions and protecting Miss Darcy. You are the best of brothers, and I know you will protect your sister.

Recently, my own need for a protector forced me to confide my disgrace to my father. I hope you are able to forgive my betrayal of our agreement. I made the decision while asking his permission to waltz with you, and he persuaded me to confess my secret. The partial lifting of my burden has allowed me some comfort, and I am gratified my father has become a staunch defender of my reputation. I have suffered greatly from thinking he would rebuke me for my failure to remain chaste, but he has exhibited much sympathy for my plight.

He immediately put in place a plan to guard me, and the neighbourhood, from Mr Wickham. Mr Reynolds has provided some information on the unsavoury nature of Wickham’s character among the population of Derbyshire that my father and Sir William Lucas will communicate to Colonel Forster. They will also recommend that Colonel Forster write to Colonel Fitzwilliam for testimony as to Mr Wickham’s character. My father and Mr Reynolds plan to visit the uncle of another young woman, Miss King, to warn him of Mr Wickham being suspected of charming women for their fortunes.

I will only add, I hope the many celebrations of this season of birthdays, including that of our Lord, will bring you joy. God bless you.

Elizabeth Bennet

Bethany smiled broadly when her father entered. “Papa, thank you for my party. The ices and madeleines were scrumptious.” Bethany giggled at her use of such a big word. Aunt Georgie taught me that word and Dr Jamie told me the name of those cakes I love.” Bethany stood up in bed and twirled around. “I love being five, and I love my pony. I am going to name her Robin… like in the story book… You know, Robin Hood.”

“But Bethany, Robin Hood was a male, and your pony is a female.”

She was momentarily unsure of her decision, but soon a big grin emerged on her face. She put her hands on her hips and refused to back down. “I know, I know, but when I visited her in the stables… she went right up to the big horses and took their oats.” Bethany laughed as she said, “She is very brave.”

Bethany flung her arms around her father’s neck and kissed him before she sat back down. He helped her beneath the covers and tucked the blanket under her chin. “Oh, and Papa, thank you for saying you will not call me Baby Duck anymore. I am soooo grown up now; and I do love my necklace. Dr Jamie said that black spot is a dead ant.” Bethany looked up earnestly at her father and said, “Tell me about my mother. Did she love me?”

Darcy was as discomposed by her remark about not calling her Baby Duck as her mother had been. He felt tears sting his eyes, and once again he was filled with remorse for thinking the worst of her because of that damn Wickham.

“Papa, are you sad? Is it because she did not love me?”

“No, Bethany, she loved you very much. She felt very sad when she was forced to leave you.”

“Yes, and I think God was mean to make her go.”

“Bethany, you should not say such things.” Her father felt the same way, but it was not God he thought mean, but himself.

After leaving his daughter, Fitzwilliam Darcy retired to his bedchamber. He read her letter two more times. Her concern for Georgiana was touching, and her father’s resolve to ensure Wickham did not harm his daughters, or those of his neighbours filled Darcy with shame. He had known of the man’s calumny, and had not said a word to any in Hertfordshire. Despite knowing Wickham was a fortune hunter, he had never once thought of protecting Miss Elizabeth or Miss King from his clutches. He had only thought of his need to keep his family’s name from dishonour. It had been his fears for Georgiana’s reputation that had caused him to raise Mrs Younge as a possible conspirator.

Living with the threat of exposure had been her life for more than five years. It was only right that she now had her father to protect and comfort her. Today had been her birthday too, and Mr Bennet had told him she refused to celebrate—and she acted as though it was the saddest day of the year. Why had he not taken the time to understand the words he was hearing in Hertfordshire?

She had said she did not want his
‘love’,
but wanted his
‘good opinion’.
He realized too late, there was much about her to admire.

Elizabeth Bennet sat in solitude on the window seat in her room. It was almost midnight on the day she was born one and twenty years ago, and the day she had given birth five years before. Her dislike of this day had caused her family to no longer attempt to wish her happiness. However, her father had deviated from her preference this year. When they were alone in his study, he had handed her a large package tied up with string. Inside were enough yards of amber silk, dark green velvet and blue and rose sprigged muslin to make four gowns.

“Elizabeth, you have denied yourself long enough. You are a lovely young woman, and your clothes should reflect your beauty. Make sure your new gowns are ready by December twentieth. Sir Walter is arriving that day, and we would not want you to be seen in his presence in less than the best. Every year he tells me you are looking more and more “shabby.” This year I, myself, plan to outshine Walter. I am thinking of going to London with Mary, Kitty and your mother for the wedding clothes. While there I plan to have a tailcoat made in the finest dark green wool, with a waistcoat of a lighter green… about the colour of the dress you wore to the Netherfield ball. I have heard that is what all the fashionable, haughty gentlemen are wearing this season.

Elizabeth had laughed. “Oh, Papa, I should have confessed to you years ago. Already you have made me feel less anxious and safer… not to mention you have helped me find some humour in my macabre life. Unhappiness does, indeed, have comic aspects one should never underestimate.”