Gravity (22 page)

break it, and the silver bit against my skin. I coughed and he released his grip, turning me around

with his hands on my shoulders.

“This structure is soundproof, and never you mind how. No Vampire could hear us if they dared

to follow, and I’m certain the one who has trailed me on two occasions did not follow us, because

he’s a dolt and drives an SUV. We’re alone.” The lilt of his Irish tone fell flat. “I’m your guard. This

means keeping your confidence. We’re not leaving this room until you tell me everything. Logan

may be daft to what’s going on, but I’m not.”

“I’m going to ask for another guard. Novis will agree when he found out what we did.”

Christian shook me so abruptly that my mouth hung open. “You do not have to act with me.

Novis isn’t going to take me down from my post on your request. It won’t be the first time he’s

heard about diddling with a guard.”

“Tarek will kill you.”

“I’ve seen a great many things in my day, and blackmail is not a new concept. Neither is my life

being in mortal danger.” He scratched his beard slowly, the other hand cupping his elbow. “I

thought about what happened, and it was the only conclusion I could draw from you throwing

yourself at me. Drunk or not, I know you’re not the sort of girl who would drop her knickers if it

meant risking her relationship. It wasn’t regret I saw in your eyes that night, it was defeat.”

Christian walked me to the chair and folded his arms. “Sit down. What you tell me will never leave

this room if it means putting your life in danger.”

“My life is not in danger.”

He gently pushed my shoulders until I was sitting in the chair. Christian knelt down and sat on

one leg, speaking in his usual dark voice. “Then whose? Logan’s?”

“Everyone,” I whispered. “I have to do exactly as he says. All of this is an elaborate play to get

back at Logan. Years ago, Tarek had a kindred spirit that he was ashamed of—one that he never

claimed in front of his elders. She fell for Logan and they mated, and Tarek never raised a

challenge because she wasn’t good enough for his family. He raped her, she got pregnant, and

through another set of circumstances, she was murdered. In Tarek’s mind, he thinks Logan stole

her away… even though he’s the one who let her go.”

“And the threat?”

I released a heavy sigh and looked at his dark lashes. “I had to betray Logan. But that wasn’t

enough because now he keeps taking it further. Now he plans to mate me, and that’s as good as

marriage. Yeah, a Mage,” I said, nodding as the stoic expression on his face slid away.

“Why haven’t you told Simon? He’s a strategist and this is his area of expertise.”

“He’ll tell Justus. Tarek laid down a threat that if anyone finds out, or if he even suspects that

anyone knows, hell carry out the murders. You know as well as I do that a Chitah is good on their

word. I can’t take that chance. I don’t know what to do,” I said in a defeated voice. “I can’t have

even one person die because I made the wrong decision.” Tears welled in my eyes and I angrily

wiped them away. “He’s Lord of his Pride, and you know by law I can’t accuse him of anything

without evidence. All that I have is my word, and that isn’t enough because he hasn’t committed

murder. He hasn’t committed anything, just made threats. I don’t even think the elders of his race

would care if he did kill me because I’m a Mage and beneath them.”

“So disappear.”

I shook my head with a ghostly expression. “He’ll do it to spite me. He’ll always have this ace

up his sleeve. Anytime he wants me to do something, all he has to do is pull it out.” I slammed my

fist on the table. “And now he’s got me wearing this damn slave collar! I can’t even fight him.”

Christian lowered his eyes. “So that explains it,” he whispered.

I pushed my face into my hands. “I’m so sorry. There was no one else I could choose and I feel

so embarrassed for what I did.” My face flushed when Christian’s hand touched my knee.

“It’s already done and forgotten. It’s more shameful to know you were forced upon me and I

went along with it.” A muffled crack came from the floor and I glanced down at a fissure in the

concrete where Christian’s fingers were splayed.

“He’s already won. Even if I were to kill myself, he’s won.”

“Don’t talk like that, lass, or I’ll kill you myself.”

That roused a smile on my face. “Can you wipe his memory of me, or—”

Christian shook his head and his voice fell to a lower octave. “He’s too protected now. Without

knowing the specific moments to erase, it would be too dangerous. Tarek or someone else will

notice he’s been scrubbed and all hell will rain down on you, or perhaps the Mageri. Attack a Lord

and not even the Mageri could protect you. It might instigate war.”

I rubbed my cold nose and looked at a broken cobweb in the corner. “Why do you have a bed?

I thought Vampires didn’t need to sleep?”

His eyes skated away.

“Oh.”

“Vampires can be particular about our privacy.”

“So you bring the luscious ladies to a dirty mattress on the floor?”

He shrugged and I changed the subject. “What if you ask Novis to leave your post? He can’t

force you to stay.”

“Fecking not. Now start from the beginning—I want every detail.”

Chapter 18

“He doesn’t care that I’m spending the night with you?” I asked.

“You know Justus,” Christian assured me. “Always full of questions. But he trusts me when it

comes to my job. It’s not to say he didn’t give me a thick ear.”

The chair wobbled as I rubbed my lower back and stretched. “How long are we staying here?”

“Until we work out a solution. If you think I intend to watch this go down, then you’re a piss-

poor judge of character.”

“Maybe we should bring Simon in after all.”

“No, you were right to not tell anyone. We can’t risk it. Tarek’s a cunning bastard, and if you

have a Vampire on your tail, it won’t be hard to track Simon’s leathery arse and pull the truth from

him.”

“The Vamp could get that information from you. A stake might change your mind.”

“I rather enjoy steak, now that you mention it. But my secrets are not easily given up, and I’ve

already knocked him around once or twice—enough to know that he couldn’t pull a tooth out of a

six-year-old’s mouth.”

“Hardy har har.”

“So nice to see your nasty temper again. I missed it,” he said, taking a seat on the edge of the

mattress.

“Do you know anything about Chitah laws or history?”

“I’m afraid I would be of little help there.” His knuckles rubbed the soft hair on his chin. “Why

not have Logan challenge him?”

“Hell no! I don’t want anyone hurt, especially him.”

Christian snorted. “It’s a bit late for that.”

I turned my head away, rubbing my drowsy eyes. Candlelight had a soothing effect—maybe

that’s why Justus clung to that lifestyle. “The only way Tarek might drop the façade is if Logan

chose another woman. He thinks Logan was lying to me about being a kindred spirit, and it was

nothing more than an infatuation.”

“Do you believe it?”

I picked at a splinter poking up from the table. “I don’t know what to believe anymore. Maybe

he’s got his wires crossed. If I no longer matter to Logan, then Tarek loses.”

“Do you think Logan would take another female?”

Christian flopped onto his back with his arms folded behind his head, blinking at the ceiling

with scheming eyes. “Think about it very carefully, Silver. Do you think there is any small part of

Logan that wants to be with another woman?”

“I don’t know. It might be appealing for him to date a Chitah. Less drama, no stress, it would

make his family happy. What’s your point?”

“Consider it. If Logan fell in love with another woman, then Tarek would be defeated. Why

would Tarek continue ripping your life apart if none of it mattered to the one man he wants to

destroy? You’re merely the hammer he’s holding to beat down the nail. If Logan has any doubts

about your relationship, if you think there’s any small hope that he would take another woman,

then I can plant the idea in his mind and erase our conversation.”

“You mean—”

“Charm him. If it doesn’t work, then nothing’s lost. It means you won’t get him back, Silver.

But at this point in the game, I don’t think he’ll pursue you much longer. You belong to Tarek now.

You’ve refused him, and a man’s pride cannot be mended.”

Charming was how a Vampire could weasel into your subconscious. “What are my choices?”

“Stay with Tarek and live in fear and keep those around you alive. Or give Logan a woman and

gain your freedom. Either way, you’ll lose Logan, but perhaps it might be a bittersweet parting;

you’ll be free and he’ll be happy.” Christian put his hands over his face, elbows in the air. “You

don’t have to decide now. Jaysus. What a load to put on someone.” His voice fell to a soft murmur.

“I should be hunting men like him. I always thought about that line of work.”

I got up from my chair and sat at the foot of the mattress with my back against the wall and

my knees bent. “Can you clean his memory of me?”

“No, I don’t recommend it. Long-term memory removal renders one insane. To remove so many

moments that are weaved in your life and embedded in specific places in time leaves gaping holes

like Swiss cheese in your head. If I’m part of a particular event in their memory, that is preferable.

It’s clean, like an eraser on a chalkboard. Intense memory cleaning is like using whiteout in a thick

book, you’re going to miss spots and they’re going to notice several pages are missing unless you

clean them all. Your mother took some time, but I left the romance with Grady intact and only

removed that last bit at the end.”

“The last bit being my conception,” I grumbled.

I reached behind my shoulder and picked at a chip in the wall. My decision would sever any

hope that Logan would wait for me, as he once promised he would. I had a rebellious streak in me

that was difficult to overlook, and he would endure criticism from his own kind. In time, Logan

would eventually want children. The closer I came to a decision, the more I knew.

I’d wasted every precious moment of opportunity. Logan came into my life as a man who

couldn’t be trusted, and ironically, he was the man who taught me to trust again. And yet I was

the one who wasn’t worthy of him.

“Will he love her?” I whispered.

“If he chooses. I can only plant the suggestion, but if any part of him is willing, then it’s out of

my hands. Do you think he is hurt enough to take another?”

“No. There’s something I have to do to finalize it.”

“Don’t fret over it, lass. Hearts are made of glass, and once broken—no one can reassemble it

for you. They can cut themselves trying, but it’s better if you just sweep up the pieces. Nothing

good ever lasts for long.”

Maybe Christian was right, but now that things were set in motion, there was one last thing I

had to take care of. “Do you know how I can get some liquid fire?”

***

It displeased Justus when I quit our early morning training sessions. He kept my body

conditioned through workouts and taught me maneuvers through our sparring. Sometimes they

were simple moves to escape an attacker, other times he focused on teaching me how to control

my energy. With the chain locked around my neck, I wouldn’t be able to flash or heal, and he

would know something was up. I kept it tucked beneath my shirt since it wasn’t a heavy piece of

jewelry.

He wanted to groom me into a warrior, but refrained from showing me complex maneuvers I’d

seen him perform. It was just enough to fight off juicers—rogues living outside Breed law who

were energy addicts, stealing light from young Learners. I’d had several encounters with juicers,

although Justus had always stepped in to protect me.

“What is this supposed to mean?” Justus shouted from my doorway.

An invitation had arrived in the mail, announcing my acceptance of Tarek’s claim.

Our engagement party.

Tarek had invited everyone close to me, moving his chess pieces strategically around the board

in case I decided to back out. I had argued with Justus for an hour before he stalked off, and now

I was facing the cooled off version.

“You can read, can’t you?”

His face was uncharacteristically red and blotchy. “If you think I will agree to this then—”

“We went over this, Ghuardian. It’s not your choice who I marry,” I replied calmly, brushing my

hair in front of my bedroom mirror. He stood behind me with an angry vein protruding from his

forehead.

“I am your Ghuardian, and that means I have control over your welfare while you are in my

custody. I have say in the matter.”

“Once we mate, I’m no longer in your custody. You have limited control over my care, but you

can’t control who I’m going to marry. I won’t have independence until you officially release me, but

you know as well as I do that if I marry, then that law is overruled. Your job will be done.” If a