Guarded (33 page)

T
HE BELLS ON
the door jangled. Shelley glanced through the square window in the door separating the back of the clinic from the lobby and spotted Lucy climbing onto the counter out front. Shelley couldn’t see the front door, only Lucy.

The ferret daintily sniffed the air, then retreated to her hidey-hole back under the desk. Seconds later, the squeaks of Beau’s new sneakers filled the unusually quiet space.

“I’m in the back, Beau. What are you doing here? You’re supposed to be walking to school.”

“Aww, Doc. How’d you know it was me?” He pushed open the door and entered the doggie spa. “What’d you do with all the dogs? You didn’t, like, kill them, did you?” he asked in mock horror.

“Today’s guests haven’t arrived yet, smart guy.” Shelley bent to sweep the last of the dust into the pan and dumped it into the garbage. Storing the broom and pan in the tiny closet, she worked to keep her voice even. “You know, the state only granted me temporary custody of you. If the social worker finds out you’ve been skipping school on my watch, she could take you away.”

Beau’s big brown eyes widened behind his new glasses. He straightened his shoulders, brushed his hands down his new shirt and jeans and gave her a solemn nod. “I’ll go in just a minute. I won’t be late, I promise, Doc. I just forgot to tell you something important this morning.”

Shelley folded her arms over her chest and waited. This wasn’t the first time in the past two weeks that Beau had shown up at the clinic before school. In the beginning, she’d accepted it because she understood better than anyone the fear of being alone in the world after the death of a parent. Like Shelley, Beau still had someone who loved him. But maybe his repeated excuses for breaking the rules were his way of pushing her away. Refusing her love.

The thought made her wince. Hadn’t she done the same thing to Dev? Shoved him away? But she wasn’t a child. She was a woman, full-grown with responsibilities, the clinic, the animals, and now a beautiful little boy.

A little boy who was noticeably stalling.

The bells on the front door jangled again.

Beau jumped, clapped his hands together once, then threw his arms around her waist. “I love you, Doc. Be back right after school!” Then he darted through the door and out of sight.

The lobby was silent, yet Shelley had the sneaking suspicion it wasn’t empty.

It had to be Dev out there. She hadn’t seen him in a month. And Beau had been asking almost nonstop about visiting him. Beau was convinced she and Dev belonged together and would be a family.

Her heart gave a funny little leap. If Dev was waiting for her, she couldn’t show him how excited she was to see him again. She’d just have to keep her emotions under tight control. He was a city cop. She was a country vet. A country vet whose time in this particular clinic was coming to end. But that didn’t matter. What mattered was that they didn’t belong together, no matter what Beau thought. No matter how much her heart ached.

Schooling her face to a pleasant but distant grin, she pushed open the swinging door.

Her heart sank.

Jules stood in the middle of the floor. Her black winter jacket hung lazily over her right arm. Her green eyes warm and hopeful. “Hi, Shelley. I hope this isn’t a bad time.”

Shelley forced herself to smile brighter, gesturing to the couch. “Not at all. I’m really glad you came. I’m sorry I couldn’t drive out to meet you. Between closing up the zoo, helping here, and fostering Beau, I haven’t had a free moment. Come in, have a seat.” Once her sister arranged herself on the couch, draping the coat across her lap, Shelley sat too. Barely a foot separated them. It could have been oceans.

When Jules had called yesterday and asked to visit, Shelley had hoped Dev would come too. Her throat burned with disappointment.

Stupid. Why would he come? Hadn’t she been the one to run away when he was in the hospital?

Except now she didn’t want to run anymore. She wanted . . . no
needed
to see Dev, no matter how much that idea terrified her.

Fine. She’d just have to make time to drive to Tidewater and see him. And hope he didn’t slam the door in her face for being such a freaking coward.

Tears stung the backs of her eyes.
Damn it. I’m not going to cry.
She quietly cleared her throat. “So, how’ve you been?”

“I could say fine. But the truth is, I barely started to get to know you again, and you left. I’ve missed you.” Jules’s lips curled at the edges slightly. She shifted her position, crossing her legs and resting a hand on Shelley’s. “You’ve got Momma’s hands.”

Shelley glanced down at her unpainted nails, then at her sister’s. Jules had dirt beneath her short fingernails. A testament to her life as a florist. “I don’t remember her hands. I remember her eyes though. They were green, like yours,” Shelley admitted, then tried to pull away.

Jules tightened her hold. “Momma’s hands were always so sure and strong. Even at the end. That woman could stitch anything and it would look brand-new. I bet you get your surgical skills from her.”

A blush heated Shelley’s cheeks. She’d been told in school she had the steadiest hands her professors had ever seen. A familiar, uncomfortable sense of need, of longing, tugged at her heart. She pushed it away. “Yes, well, I got my study habits from Nate and Jill. They were both professors, and after they adopted me, they insisted I learn the proper way to study and not slide through school on grades that came easily to me.”

She pulled away again.

Jules didn’t stop her. She rose and paced the office.

“Tell me about them,” Jules said, surprising her. “Your adoptive parents. I want to know what they were like. I want to know what your family life was like after . . . after . . .”

“After I went away?” Shelley finished for her. Then she saw it, the regret in Jules’s eyes. And something old and hot gave way to something soft and comforting. “I figured out what you did. Sending me away like that. It took a while, but I got it. You were trying to save me from a life in the system.”

“And save myself. I thought if I made you leave, you couldn’t leave me first. Seems there’s a lot of that going around.” Tears glistened on Jules’s lashes. Shelley nodded, amazed by how similar they were. Before she could comment, Jules went on, “I know I hurt you. I know I made you believe I abandoned you, but I didn’t. You’re my sister and I love you. I just wanted you to have a family that I didn’t think I could have.”

“But you did. Didn’t you?” Shelley finally voiced the question she’d always carried. “You were adopted too. And by good people. Right?”

When she only nodded, Shelley said, “Then you did save yourself. You have a family now.”

“Now that I’ve found you, Shelley, I have most of my family. Next up is finding Hannah. Ian says he might have a lead. The couple that adopted Hannah made the news a few years ago. He thinks he’s close to finding her.”

A thrill of hope went through her. Shelley pushed it aside. “Jules, we got lucky finding each other. We may never find Hannah, you have to face that.”

Shelley’s words were cut off when Jules crossed back to her, taking her by the shoulders. Love and sadness in her eyes. “No, I don’t.” Jules crossed her arms, her face a picture of determination. “And you can’t tell me you don’t hope she’s out there looking for us. I saw the look on your face a minute ago.”

“All right, yes. I want to find Hannah,” Shelley admitted. Saying it aloud made it real and, jeez, gave her hope. Hope sucked. “Jules, you already have a family. You don’t need me—”

“My family isn’t complete without you. I need you. Just like you need me.”

God, she wanted to believe that. She might be twenty-four, but a woman always carries the girl she once was inside her. And the girl inside Shelley desperately wanted her older sister in her life. “I’ve been alone for so long.”

“You’re wrong,
Tiger Lily
.”

Shelley froze. Her heart thumped wildly in her chest. “How do you know that name? No one’s ever called me that but—”

“Nate and Jill, I know.” Jules smiled gently. “They told me. They’ve been with you. Watching over you for years. Even Barty’s been hanging around. He’s the reason the other dogs go nuts.”

Shelley shook her head. Her hands shook and her heart pounded. She had to stare, unblinking, to keep from letting even one tear escape. “Can they . . . ?” She paused, horrified by the way her voice shook. “Can they hear me now?”

Jules paused a moment, then glanced at something on the far wall. “Yeah, they can hear you.”

“Can you tell them I’m sorry? I didn’t mean it when I told them I was sick of them hovering over me. I wish I had gone to the cabin with them.”

“Never say that,” Jules snapped. She covered her mouth with a hand briefly, as if to restrain some emotion, then dropped it again. “Nate and Jill aren’t the only ones who would be devastated if you had died that night. They said you have a gift, and they’re so proud of you. Of what you’ve accomplished. What you will accomplish.”

“Really?” Her voice wavered, but this time, she didn’t try to fight the tears. “Thank you, Nate and Jill. I loved you both so much.”

And for an instant, Shelley thought she heard a dog bark in the distance.

Jules let out a watery chuckle. “Barty didn’t want you to forget him.”

“Did he just bark?” Shelley’s eyes widened when Jules nodded. “I think I heard him.” Glancing in the direction of the sound, she added, “I love you too, Barty.”

Jules’s smile faded. “Shelley, it’s time. They said they have to go. They’ve been with you all these years because they didn’t want you to be alone. Now that they know you’ll never be alone again, they need to move on.”

For a moment, the clinic was bathed in a pure white light, so bright it made her eyes ache. Silhouetted in the glow stood a couple, holding hands and a gorgeous Bay retriever. The light grew blinding, then winked out.

In the silence, there was a lingering feeling of love in the air and the undeniable sensation of loss.

Jules’s arms were around Shelley. She hadn’t seen her sister move, but suddenly, her face was pressed against Jules’s shoulder. Then all the pain and fear and guilt of the past flooded away, and she wept as she’d never wept before. For the mother who died of cancer, for the strangers who became her parents, for the sisters she thought she’d lost forever.

She wept until she was spent. Jules handed her the box of tissues Shelley kept on the bookcase by the couch. “Thanks,” she said, soggily.

The front bells jangled. The door opened just enough to allow Dev to poke his head in. “Jules, Seth’s on the phone. He says he thinks he’s got something on your vision from last week.”

Then Shelley saw him. His astonishing gray eyes flashed with concern and love before he blanked his gaze. He broke eye contact first. “I’ll just tell him you’ll call him back.”

“No, wait,” Jules said, rising. “Shelley, I need to take this.” She leaned down and whispered, “And I think you need to talk to Dev. He’s been a giant pain in the butt without you.”

Gracefully, Jules plucked the cell from Dev’s fingers and slipped out the door.

And there they stood, face to face in her office. Shelley wanted to tell Dev she loved him. She wanted to tell him she’d been a fool to run away. She wanted to kiss him.

Instead she blurted, “Hi, Dev. How’s your shoulder?”

*   *   *

S
HELLEY
LOOKED
SO
vulnerable standing in the middle of the floor, chewing on her bottom lip. It took everything Dev had not to sweep her into his arms and kiss the worry out of her. But he suspected she’d bolt again if he tried, so he flexed his toes inside his Ferragamos and held himself back. Except, damn, standing with his back ramrod straight made his shoulder ache.

“It’s healing, thanks. How are the tiger cubs?”

A smile flashed across her face as she chewed her lip again. “They’re fine. They’re being relocated to the Tidewater Zoo next month. With the Elkridge Zoo closed down, I’ve been arranging for the animals to all find good homes. You know in a sick way, Adam was doing the same thing. While Reyna sold the first tiger cub to a private collector, Adam sent the other animals to actual zoos across the country.”

“Real humanitarian.”

Shells snorted. “Not really. He hates everyone. Even me. I can’t think of him as Jacob anymore. Jacob was my friend. Adam is just a killer. Anyway, I went to see him in the jail and found out just how much he hated me. Seems our common love for the animals was the only thing we shared.” Her smile faded to a look of complete despair. “He killed all those people, the jeweler, the D.A., and Tomás. God, poor Tomás. He died because he’d seen a tape from the night of Colbert’s murder and figured out it was Adam. If you and your cousins hadn’t stopped him, Adam would have killed Eddy, Reyna, Beau, and me too.”

Dev did move now. Three steps was all it took. Then she walked into his arms. He couldn’t keep from touching her face, her hair. He’d already known it all. And more. He’d made sure the sheriff’s office shared the information with him.

“I couldn’t lose you too,” she whispered so softly against his chest that he doubted his hearing.