Gutta Mamis (26 page)

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I
t was so dark and windy that night. Nadine planned on leaving right after choir rehearsal and heading straight home because she had an early morning briefing with Denise, her business partner and best friend, and the rest of their staff. They were going to discuss a strategy to save the $6 million dollar portfolio they were in danger of losing to the bank.

The car alarm to Nadine's Inuit white Audi made a chirping sound when she pressed the keyless entry remote to deactivate it. Just as she got ready to open her door, Jeff Jackson, Denise's husband, appeared out of nowhere with his arm graciously extended in Nadine's direction.

“Here, let me get that for you,” Jeff offered, stepping in front of Nadine before she could reach for the door handle. “Woman, you know better than to come out here all by yourself while it's this dark,” he playfully chastised.

Nadine worked up a yawn. “Isn't this sacred ground?”

Jeff let out a loose chuckle. “Yeah, but I can tell you right now that doesn't mean anything to a base-head.” Jeff was born and raised in the hood and wasn't afraid to face the facts. It was a cruel world and the church they attended just so happened to be located in one of the worst parts of it.

Nadine smiled at Jeff's sincere concern for her safety. She leaned over to place her purse on the passenger seat. The fruity air freshener that hung from the neck of her rearview mirror had the entire car smelling like a watermelon patch. The scent was so strong, Nadine instantly regretted choosing it over the jasmine floral deodorizer she normally bought. She slowly turned back around to face a tower of smooth and handsome dark chocolate. Jeff was well dressed as always, wearing a black, two-button, single-breasted suit jacket; underneath it a white French-fly dress shirt. Blue denim instead of dress pants. Nadine never thought a pair of jeans could look so damn good on a man. She struggled to keep her gaze from settling on Jeff's lower half, allowing her eyes to take in his large white patent leather Jordans; at least a size twelve in her estimation. Not only did Jeff have a natural swagger, he had a sense of style, too. Old school flava with New Age spunk and looks that could conjure the panties right off a woman.

Nadine's eyes hungrily examined him from head to toe. Something was missing and then it hit her at once; his glasses. With the bit of light from her car, she was able to look straight into his mesmerizing chestnut-brown eyes.

“Where's Denise?” she inquired finally. “I thought she'd be here tonight.” She pushed her hair behind her ears. It never failed. Every time she found herself in Jeff's presence, she grew nervous. Out of the six years she'd known him, that butterfly feeling still swarmed around the pit of her stomach, holding her accountable for all of her woulda-coulda-shouldas.

Jeff folded his arms. “I don't know where my wife is. She said she
needed to take care of some things at the office and then she'd be heading over afterwards, but”—Jeff scoffed as he looked around the empty parking lot—“I guess we can see she never got around to it. So she has me running her errands.” He raised a stack of Christmas programs bound together with a thick rubber band. But even if Denise hadn't asked him to drop off the programs, he probably would have volunteered, knowing that Nadine would be here. He relished every chance to see her. He just wished that one day he could work up the nerve to tell Nadine how he'd truly felt about her all these years.

Nadine's furrowed eyebrows showed her suspicion because Denise hadn't mentioned missing rehearsal when they spoke two hours prior. Or maybe Denise had and Nadine was just too tired to remember. But had Nadine known in advance, she would have considered skipping rehearsal herself. She could barely stay awake. She glanced down at her watch, blinked sleepily.

Jeff tried not to stare at Nadine, but failed terribly. His disobedient eyes scanned her 5'8” frame. He was checking all of her out and with God as his witness, Nadine was still the finest woman he'd ever laid eyes on. “So where you heading off to?” he asked, examining her from a new angle.

Nadine's reply was uneven. “I'm headed home. It's so late.” She stifled a yawn. “Excuse me. Not only is it past my bedtime, but your wife and I have an early meeting tomorrow with a client that wants us to analyze his accounts. Can you believe that after all the time we spent winning him over, he continues to make us jump through hoops and over hurdles to maintain just a piece of his portfolio?” She shook her head, allowing the frustration that had been lurking all day to show its ugly face. “All the money we made for him and now he's ready to bail out on us. Some people are so damn ungrateful—!” Nadine caught herself, raised her right hand to the sky, bit down on her tongue as a faint smile appeared. “Lord, forgive me. That was so unladylike.”

Jeff shook his head, smiled. “Don't worry about it. You must have forgotten that I'm married to a woman that cusses like a sailor. Besides, if something is on your mind, let it off.”

Nadine inhaled as much of the polluted night air as she could take
in at once. “It's just”—she raised her hands and then dismissed the thought altogether once she felt herself getting worked up again—“Never mind.”

Jeff stood directly in front of Nadine, taking in her radiant smile, sexy aura, and the beautiful personality that had first attracted him to her way back when. He often wondered what would have happened between them if he'd confessed to her early on that she was a longing desire he kept tucked in the nest of his heart. He imagined what it would have been like marrying Nadine instead of Denise. He envisioned Deandra, his daughter, having Nadine's brown, narrow eyes, round nose, and smooth butterscotch skin so enticing it was only a fraction away from appearing edible. And since the day they'd first met, he often fantasized about making love to Nadine whenever he was intimate with Denise. He imagined making memories between her legs as she counted backwards from ten, a digit for every inch of his blessings. He fantasized about stroking Nadine so deep that in the middle of her climax she'd call out his name in a cursing fit because he was fucking her so damn good. Then before she could even cross that finish line, he'd deepen his thrust, harden his stroke, grab her by the waist and force her warm erotic passion to surrender to his own as they rode the waves of ecstasy together. Jeff couldn't get Nadine out of his head and the only thing he felt guilty about was the realization he didn't want to. She supplied him with peace and didn't even know it.

“Oh! Have I lost my mind?” Nadine blurted, breaking Jeff's concentration with a smile that exposed straight white teeth shaped by childhood braces. “How could I stand here and not congratulate you on the new promotion? I hear you're running things now, Mr. General Manager.” She straightened her posture. “So when I'm out of a job tomorrow,” she said, pointing a perfectly manicured finger at herself and then at Jeff, “I'll be running over to your job. Sell a few cars, sweep some floors, hang balloons or something.” She laughed. While Nadine was only joking, the weight of her last comment forced her to lean back against her driver door. It was as though she just set off an explosive the way the words ricocheted from her mouth, leaving a terrible aftertaste. The uncomfortable thought of working for anyone other than the
extremely wealthy clients who bankrolled her lifestyle was depressing, not to mention a hard pill to swallow. She could never go back to the clock-punching days that barely financed a third of her wardrobe. She could barely eat off of those checks, she remembered painfully. If it hadn't been for the aunt that raised her and put her through school, she didn't know how she would have managed.

Before allowing the threat of losing their most prized client take hold of her, Nadine switched her mindset back to the present. She sucked in her lips.
Now what were we just talking about?
she thought. Finally remembering, she said, “So I guess everybody's
hustling
nowadays to maintain what they have. This recession has really hit us in the financial industry.”

Listen to her.
Jeff laughed inside at how she carefully pronounced every word. Even when Nadine tried to fit in and speak the lingo, the slang, it just didn't sound right coming out of her mouth. But her attempts were always flattering. “Yeah, everybody's gotta have a back-up plan to stay on top of all this madness,” he replied. “But speaking of hustling, Denise and I just got into an argument about that the other day. She thinks I'm working too much overtime, but hell, that was in my job description. She was unhappy with me
just
selling cars. Now that I'm managing the dealership, she's still unhappy.”

Nadine's face showed her concern. Denise normally shared everything with Nadine about her marriage, but surprisingly she hadn't mentioned anything to Nadine about this. As far as Nadine knew, Denise was ecstatic about her husband being promoted to general manager; at least proud enough to share the news with the entire staff one day in a board meeting.

“Well, you guys will work it out,” Nadine assured him with a questionable sincerity in her voice. She allowed herself a brief pause, then continued. “Seriously, how long have I known you two to go through these periods of being mad over nothing?” She answered for him, her neck moving with each word. “Too long. It must be a marriage thing,” she said, shrugging her shoulders, at a loss for a better explanation. Before the sentence left her mouth though, Nadine knew she was lying to Jeff. She tried coaching herself on the next best thing to say
until she saw the look of unhappiness swell in his eyes. What had she gotten herself into now? Jeff and Denise's marriage wasn't any business of hers, she kept telling herself, and it would only complicate things if she stood there and allowed him to express himself in a way that made Denise look like a foolish woman undeserving of a good man. Because that would open up doors. Doors she knew should remain closed.

The wind sent another invasive chill and, instantly, Nadine's nipples hardened into bullets as thick as her pinky. The swell of her breasts made the silver, buttoned-down blouse she wore dislodge itself from the waist of her pencil skirt. That should have been her cue to leave but instead she reached in her car, started the engine, and permitted the heat to circulate between them.

Jeff stared into thin air, then back at Nadine. “I just don't know sometimes.” He tilted his head. “It's like whatever I do, it's just not good enough anymore,” he exclaimed honestly. He couldn't figure out where he'd gone wrong in their relationship but it was apparent that Denise was so wrapped up in herself and everything else that he didn't even exist in her world. That was why it was so easy for him to put in fifty to eighty hours a week and not feel missed at home. When Denise did decide to throw the shit up in his face, it was right before they became intimate. But Jeff was no fool. He knew that it was just another lame ass excuse to keep him from bothering her for sex. So before the night was up, they would be screaming and shouting, then to the couch he would go to finish himself off alone. There was nothing about their marriage that felt special anymore; nothing that gave him a reason to come home every night or a reason to remain faithful. Everything leading up to the point he was at now had been a living hell. And while the pussy coupons women threw his way should have been the quick fix he needed, they did absolutely nothing for him. His only true interest was in one woman—Nadine Collins.

Nadine couldn't help but wonder where all Jeff's complaining was coming from. It was all so sudden, and not that she minded being a listening ear, tonight was just not a good night for it. She had no choice but to refuse to listen to his gripes about Denise, because she was already yawning and struggling to keep her eyes open, and also
struggling to keep them from drifting down to the fly of his jeans. That may have actually been the bigger struggle. Oh how she wished just for one second that she had X-ray vision. She moved closer to him.

“Jeff, honey, I want you to try to relax,” Nadine said in her calmest voice. She began rubbing his shoulders. He was tense, almost as tense as the muscles in her pussy. She focused on those stubborn knots, massaging her fingers deeply in and out of every groove. Before she knew it, she had gotten herself wet. She looked around the parking lot, which thankfully was now empty except for Jeff's black BMW parked in the far corner under a leaning thirty-foot elm tree. She didn't want to risk someone coming out of the church and seeing the two of them alone.