Hades (20 page)

she’d adopted a maternal attitude toward me, as if I were a

fledgling that had to be protected and nursed to strength. It

was only to satisfy Hanna that I ate hasty mouthfuls of what

she’d prepared—crusty bread, some kind of chunky stew,

and a fruit tart. Afterward she didn’t leave right away but

lingered and I sensed she had something on her mind.

“Miss,” she said eventual y. “What was your life like

before you came here?”

“I was in my senior year of high school and living in a

smal town where everybody knew one another.”

“But that wasn’t where you came from.”

It surprised me that Hanna should make reference to my

former home. I was so used to protecting our secret on

earth, I kept forgetting that here my true identity was

common knowledge.

“I may not have come from Venus Cove,” I admitted. “But

it became my home. I went to a school cal ed Bryce

Hamilton and I had a best friend cal ed Mol y.”

“My parents were workers in a factory,” Hanna said

suddenly. “We were too poor for me to go to school.”

“Did you have books at home?”

“I never learned to read.”

“It’s not too late,” I said encouragingly. “I’l teach you, if

you like.”

Instead of reassuring her, as I’d hoped, my words

seemed to have the opposite effect on Hanna. She

dropped her gaze and her smile vanished.

“There’s not much point now, miss,” she said.

“Hanna,” I began, choosing my words careful y. “Can I

ask you a question?”

She shot me a frightened look and then nodded.

“How long have you been here?”

“Over seventy years,” she replied in a resigned tone.

“And how is it that someone as gentle and kind as you

ended up here?” I asked.

“It’s a long story.”

“I’d like to hear it,” I said and Hanna shrugged.

“There’s not much to tel . I was young. I wanted to save

someone more than I wanted my own soul. I made a pact,

sold myself into this life, and when I realized my mistake, it

was too late.”

“Would you choose differently if you could have your time

over?”

“I suppose I would try to achieve the same outcome but in

a different way.” Hanna’s eyes seemed to mist over, and

she stared wistful y ahead, lost in her own memories.

“That means you’re sorry. You were too young to know

what you were doing. When my family comes for me, we’l

take you with us. I won’t leave you behind.”

“Don’t waste your time worrying about me, miss. I made

the decision to come freely and there’s no backing out of a

deal like that.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” I said breezily. “Al deals are open to

renegotiation.”

Hanna smiled, her wariness slipping for a moment. “I

would like forgiveness,” she said in a smal voice, “but

there’s no one here to offer it.”

“Maybe if you tel me about it you’l feel better.” Anxious

as I was to return to Xavier’s side, I couldn’t ignore Hanna’s

cry for help. She had cared for me and nursed me through

some dark hours and I was indebted to her. Besides, I’d

only been in Hades a few weeks. Whatever burden Hanna

was carrying, she’d carried for decades. The least I could

do was set her mind at ease if it was within my power. I

shifted my position to make room for her and patted the

bedspread beside me. To an ignorant onlooker we might

have looked like two girls sharing teenage confidences.

Hanna hesitated and glanced at the door before sitting

down beside me. I knew she felt uncomfortable because

she kept her eyes lowered and her fingers, red from

washing, nervously twisted the buttons on her uniform. She

was weighing up in her mind whether she could trust me.

Who could blame her? She was alone in Jake’s

underworld. There was no one for her to turn to for a kind

word or advice. She had come to feel grateful for every

meal and every night she slept through unharmed. I had the

feeling that if anyone were to try to hurt Hanna, she would

endure it like a martyr because she didn’t believe she

deserved any better.

Hanna leaned back and sighed. “I hardly know where to

begin. I haven’t spoken about my old life in such a long

time.”

“Start wherever you like,” I prompted.

“I’l begin then with Buchenwald,” she said softly. She

spoke with detachment; her youthful face devoid of feeling,

as if she were a storytel er narrating a fable rather than

giving a firsthand account.

“The concentration camp?” I asked incredulously. “You

were there? I had no idea!” I instantly regretted my

interruption as I could see my reaction had halted Hanna’s

train of thought. “Please, go on.”

“In life my name was Hanna Schwartz. In 1933, I had my

sixteenth birthday. The Depression hit workers the hardest.

We had little money and I had no skil s so I joined the Hitler

Youth, and when Buchenwald was opened, I was sent to

work there.” She paused and drew a deep breath. “I knew

that everything happening there was wrong. Not just wrong,

I knew I was surrounded by evil, but I felt powerless to do

anything about it and I did not want to let my family down. Al

around me people were asking: Where is God in this? How

could he let this happen? I tried not to think about it, but

deep down I was angry with God—I blamed him. I was

planning to apply for a transfer and leave the camp to go

home to my parents, when a girl arrived who I recognized. I

knew her from home. We had played together as children.

She lived in my street and went to the local school. Her

father was a doctor. He treated my brother once when he

had measles and didn’t even ask for payment. Esther was

her name. She shared her books from school with me

because she knew how badly I wanted to learn. I was too

young to understand the difference between us. I knew her

life was like mine only she was wealthier, she went to

school, and she was a Jew. I knew the SS had evicted and

relocated her family, but I didn’t see her again until she

turned up that day at Buchenwald. She was with her mother

and I tried to stay out of sight. I didn’t want them to see me

there. Esther wasn’t wel when they brought her in and she

seemed only to get worse. There was something wrong

with her lungs and she couldn’t breathe properly. She was

too weak to work and I knew what her fate would be. It was

only a matter of time. Somehow, I knew I couldn’t let it

happen.

“That was when I met Jake. He was one of the young

officers overseeing the camp, but he looked different from

how he does now. His hair was lighter and in his uniform he

was not so conspicuous. I knew he liked me. He smiled at

me and tried to make conversation whenever I served food

to the officers. One day I was saddened thinking of Esther

and he stopped me to ask what was wrong. I made the

mistake of trusting him and took the opportunity to tel him

about my fears for my childhood friend. When he told me he

might be able to help, I couldn’t believe my luck. I thought if I

could do one good thing I might be able to respect myself

again. Karl, that was what Jake cal ed himself then, was so

beautiful and so mesmerizing. The fact that someone like

him would acknowledge my existence, let alone show

interest in my problems, was flattering. He asked me

whether I believed in God and I told him that the way my life

had played out so far, if there was ever a God, he must

have deserted us. Karl told me he had a secret he wanted

to share, because he felt he could trust me. He told me he

served a higher master, one who repaid loyalty. He said I

could help Esther if I swore undying loyalty to him. He told

me not to be afraid and that I would be rewarded for my

sacrifice with eternal life. When I think back on it, I don’t

know why he bothered to single me out. I think he must have

been bored and looking for someone to play with.” Hanna

paused as her mind traveled back to her dark past. “It

sounded so simple at the time.”

“What happened?” I asked even though the answer was

obvious.

“Esther was healed. Jake restored her to health so the

guards would have no reason to harm her and I came into

the darkness. But I wasn’t sure Jake had kept his end of the

bargain … .”

“Did he?” I asked breathlessly.

“He made her wel again.” Hanna’s sad brown eyes

flickered up to meet mine. “But that did not keep her from

the gas chambers two weeks later.”

“He betrayed you!” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

“He tricked you into bargaining away your life. That’s

despicable, even for Jake.”

“It could have been worse,” Hanna said. “When I was

thrown into Hades, I somehow avoided the pit. I was

assigned duties at the hotel and I’ve been here ever since.

So you see, miss, I brought this fate upon myself. I cannot

complain.”

“But your intentions were good, Hanna. I think there’s

hope for everyone.”

“There is while you are walking the earth. This is a final

destination. I don’t hope for anything now and I do not

believe in miracles.”

“You have seen the devil at work,” I said. “Why can’t you

believe in the power of Heaven as wel ?”

“Heaven has no mercy for the likes of me. I made a pact

and belong to Hel now. Not even angels can dissolve those

ties.”

I frowned and sat on the edge of my bed. Could Hanna

be right? Would the laws of Heaven and Hel bind her to this

prison? Surely her sacrifice had to count for something.

She had wel and truly served her sentence. But maybe it

didn’t work that way. I hoped I hadn’t made a promise to her

I wouldn’t be able to keep. Hanna busied herself tidying the

items on my dressing table. They were mainly French

perfumes, lotions, and powders—the sort of things Jake

thought would make me happy. He real y didn’t have a clue.

I looked at Hanna, who was now shuffling around the

room and avoiding making eye contact.

“You don’t believe they’l find me, do you?” I asked softly.

She didn’t answer but only tidied more energetical y. I felt

an overwhelming urge to grab her forcibly by the shoulders

and shake her into understanding. Because if I succeeded

in convincing Hanna then I might convince myself that I

wasn’t going to be a prisoner for eternity. “You don’t get it!” I

yel ed to my own surprise. “You don’t get what I am. Right

now I have a whole covenant of archangels plus a seraphim

looking for me. They’l find a way to get me out of here.”

“If you say so, miss.” Hanna gave a perfunctory reply.

“Don’t say it like that.” I glowered at her. “What are you

real y thinking?”

“Al right, I’l tel you what I’m thinking.” Hanna put down

her dust cloth and faced me. “If it was so easy for angels to

storm this prison, don’t you think they would have by now?”

Hanna’s tone became more tender. “If they could just free

the souls in torment, wouldn’t they have done so? Wouldn’t

God have intervened? You see, miss, Heaven and Hel are

bound by rules as old as time itself. No angel can enter

here uninvited. Think of it this way, could a demon just walk

into Heaven?”

“Not a chance,” I said as I reluctantly tried to fol ow her

train of thought. “Not in a mil ion years. But this is different.

Isn’t it?”

“The only thing that works in your favor is that Jake

tricked you into trusting him. Your angels wil have to find a

loophole, just like he did. It is not impossible, but it is very

difficult. The entries to Hel are wel guarded.”

“I don’t believe you,” I proclaimed as loudly as if I were

addressing an audience. “Where there’s a wil , there’s a

way, and Xavier has a wil stronger than anyone I know.”

“Ah, yes, the human boy from your hometown,” said

Hanna rueful y. “I have heard some talk about him.”

“What have you heard?” I asked, fired up by her mention

of Xavier.

“The prince is very envious of him,” said Hanna. “He has

every blessing a human could ask for—beauty, strength,

and courage. He is unafraid of death and he is aligned with

angels. Plus, he possesses the one thing Jake wants more

than anything.”

“And what’s that?”

“The key to your heart. That makes him quite a threat.”

“See, Hanna?” I said. “If Jake feels threatened that

means there’s hope, after al . Xavier wil come for us.”