Hailey's Truth (16 page)

That’s why few people other than Morgan and Sarah knew her whole story. The only man she ever told, her first and only serious boyfriend, had dumped her promptly after her confession. Todd’s father had had his eye on the Governor’s seat. Her biological mother’s unsavory lifestyle could’ve jeopardized his chances of a win if the media ever found out.

It had never mattered that she was nothing like her mother, that she barely even remembered the woman.

Hailey muttered that mantra each day of her three years with the Fraziers. Mother Frazier had been determined to undo every ounce of effort her mom and dad had put in to making her whole.

Mother Frazier had punished her with backbreaking chores, impossible demands, and constant childcare duties for her biological children, all because Hailey was ‘too beautiful’—whatever that meant. Beauty was the work of the devil. Her taut, curvy body drew the wandering eyes of men—a sin against the Lord, in Mother Frazier’s eyes. Hailey had been reminded daily that she would burn in hell like her whore mother.

She put up with each verbal blow until the day she turned eighteen. At 12:01 a.m., Hailey stepped from their door with a backpack full of the few items she had and walked the five miles to the bank, where ten thousand dollars plus interest waited—her inheritance from her parents.

She’d dozed on the steps of First Bank and Trust, waiting for nine a.m. When the time came, she cashed out her account and took the bus to L.A., celebrating every mile the Greyhound put between her and the Fraziers’, knowing she would never have to go back.

Alone and overwhelmed in the big city, she took the first job she found, waitressing by day, and when that didn’t put her far enough ahead, she scrubbed toilets at the university, third shift.

She’d saved for two years, adding to her tiny little account, until she could afford to take a class or two and move into the huge house in the Palisades, splitting the rent and bills with five other women, all the while paying a private investigator to find Jeremy, with no luck.

She continued to work her fingers to the bone until she met Sarah the year before Kylee had been born. Sarah had offered her odd jobs for a generous wage. Eventually, she’d been able to give up her janitorial duties and cut back her waitressing shifts to three nights a week. After Kylee came and Jake died in Afghanistan, she and Sarah had grown closer. Hailey was there for Sarah during her darkest hours, and Sarah had returned the favor a million times over.

Hailey got out of bed, still staring at Austin, as she made her way to the bathroom. Now that the night was over and the magic of the evening gone, she doubted he would be here when she got out of the shower.

Closing the door, Hailey brought the shower to life, pulled her pajamas off, and stepped under the warm spray, hating that she felt so defensive and suspicious. Closing her eyes, she blew out through her mouth as streams of water cascaded over her face.

Why were these insecurities rushing back? She’d put all of this away, burying her emotional baggage so many years ago, but now that Jeremy was back, now that Austin was confusing her, changing everything, her past was never far from the surface.

As much as Hailey wanted to believe her past didn’t affect the woman she was today, she knew differently.

Mother Frazier had successfully planted small doubts all those years ago, and Hailey still wasn’t fully able to dismiss them. Was a part of her like her biological mother? Did the need for mindless sex and an urge for drugs lay dormant somewhere deep?

Todd had dumped her because of her past, and Hailey had dumped the only other man she’d allow touch her after a casual romp in his dorm room. Each kiss, each touch, had filled her with shame, fearful that Mother Frazier’s words were the absolute truth—she was nothing but a good for nothing whore.

Ugh
,
enough
. Hailey washed quickly and stepped from the shower, eager to dress and walk on the beach, eager to shut off her racing mind. She needed the sun to bake away her troubling thoughts. She wrapped herself in a towel and opened the door. Austin still lay in bed, awake.

“Good morning.”

“Morning.” She heard her own stiff reply.

He sat up, frowning, turned off the TV. “You okay?”

“Yeah, fine.” Hailey hurried to the dresser, pulled a black bikini, jean shorts and a red tank top free.

“Are you mad I stayed?”

“No.”

Austin got out of bed. He ran his hands up her arms, back down—an intimate gesture that only confused her more. This wasn’t simple and this wasn’t friends. She took a step back.

“Did I steal the covers or something?” He smiled.

She didn’t return it. “What are you doing, Austin? Why are you still here?”

“Because this is where I want to be.”

The ease of his answer left her leery. She took another step back. “Why? You said this wasn’t what you wanted. You very distinctly told me you didn’t want me, that you weren’t attracted to me.”

“No, I didn’t. You told
me
I didn’t want you, that I wasn’t attracted to you. I said I wanted to keep things friendly between us.”

Her brow shot up. “Last night was more than friendly.”

He stepped toward her again, his warm hands resting against her shoulders. “If I did anything to make you even a little bit uncomfortable—“

Hailey closed her eyes, sighing as she saw the concern in his. “You didn’t make me uncomfortable; I just don’t understand.”

“What?”

She broke free of his grip, sat on the edge of the bed.

He followed, plunking himself next to her.

“Why the sudden change?” She fiddled with her fingers. “You seemed pretty content with simplicity. Then, we talk on the steps, and you decide you want to walk on the beach and hold hands. Then you kissed me.” Unable to remain still, she stood and began to pace. “If this is some sort of pity thing or if you have some sort of notion that I’m easy like my biological mother—“

Austin rushed to his feet. “
What
?” He whirled her around. “What the fuck, Hailey?”

She tried to smother the guilt of her accusations as she stared at the shocked hurt all over Austin’s face.

“I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, but I’m going to try to ignore the fact that you just insulted both of us.”

Jutting out her chin, Hailey’s eyes filled, already knowing she was completely wrong.

Austin jammed his hands in his pockets. “Is this what you think of me? Is this what you think of yourself? I can only like you or want you because of pity, because I think you’re what—what a slut like some woman you don’t even know?”

She flinched at the truth of his words, and shame quickly replaced guilt, her stomach curdling with it. “I’m—“

“I’m not finished,” he interrupted, rushing forward, pulling her against him, his eyes smoldering. “I wanted you long before I ever knew your story. I still want you, but not because I feel sorry for you or think I can use you for some cheap lay. If anything, I only admire you more for what you’ve made out of the really shitty hand you were dealt.” He let her go, leaving her cold as he headed for the door.

“Austin, wait.”

“I’ll see you around.” He opened the door, shut it solidly behind him.

Hailey stared after him for several seconds as her breath came in tearing shudders. She clutched her towel in a vice grip as the first tear raced down her cheek. Why did she do that? What had she been thinking? She eased herself on the bed, put her face in her trembling hands, and gave in to her tears.

Austin didn’t deserve the filthy, vile accusations she threw his way. How would she make things right? Would an apology be enough?

Hailey took several steadying breaths, trying to find her way through her emotional storm. Her door opened again and Austin stepped back inside. She stared at the firm set of his jaw, the steel in his eyes, before she crumbled. Hailey turned away, trying to stifle her desperate crying.

She stood and started toward the bathroom, fully intending to lock the door until she had herself under control. Her tears were for her and her alone. Regrets and apologies would have to wait until later. The emotional upheaval of the last two months was all hitting her this very morning. She would deal with it and move on—alone.

“Hey,” Austin said, taking her arm.

She shook her head, unable to do more.

“Hey,” he said again, his voice gentle, as he followed her to the bathroom.

“Please, Austin. Please go away.”

He sat on the lip of the tub pulled her down on his lap, snuggling her against him until her head rested against his chest.

Hailey pressed her face to his shirt as Austin cocooned her against him, resting his cheek on her hair, skimming his hand up and down her arm.

When her sobs turned to sniffles, Hailey wiped her palms over her cheeks and sat up, feeling foolish for so many things.

Austin swiped his fingers through her hair, brushing wisps away from her forehead. “Better?”

“Mostly.” She wiped at her eyes. “Except for the part about feeling awful for the things I said to you. I’m so sorry, Austin.” She wrapped her arms around him, hugging him close. “If there was any way I could take it back, I would.”

“I guess I don’t understand where it came from. I had no idea you thought stuff like that.”

She shrugged, wishing she
didn’t
think stuff like that. “Sometimes. Not very often.” She confessed to Austin what she’d been too ashamed to tell anyone. “Having Jeremy back in my life has brought up a lot of things I didn’t know still bothered me. In a lot of ways, I’ve had to take out my past, dust it off, and replay it. I don’t like to; I don’t want to; but it seems to be something I have to deal with regardless.”

“I’m right here.” He brushed her hair back again. “You’re only alone if you choose to be. You can talk to me about any of it. It’s not my place to judge. We all have skeletons, things we aren’t proud of.”

Where did this man come from, and how had she gotten so lucky? If she wasn’t careful, she would fall in love—if she hadn’t a little already. She hugged him again, smiled. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” He touched his warm lips to hers, then again, adding pressure before he eased back. “You ready to get this day started?”

She studied him, still trying to get a handle on this sudden change between them. “Yup. What should we do first?”

“Well, I’m thinking you might want to get dressed.” He gave her one of his slow grins, sending her heart racing.

She glanced down at her towel-clad body and returned his smile. “That would definitely be a good place to start.”

They wandered out to the bedroom. Hailey grabbed the outfit she’d left on the bed. “I’ll be right back.”

“I’ll be right here.” He sent her another smile before she hurried to the bathroom, happy, settled for the first time in too long.

Hailey brushed her teeth and hair in five minutes flat and headed out to Austin, not wanting to waste one moment of the day. He was shirtless in swim trunks. She stared at bulging biceps, firm pectorals, chiseled abs.

“Wow, and I thought I was fast. You went over and changed?”

“And brushed my teeth.” Austin held up the bottle of sun block the Cooke’s had included in her birthday gift bag. “Sun block first, then what’s on the agenda?”

“Uh…” Was she actually supposed to think when he stood in front of her looking like that?

“You said something about horseback riding.”

“Um...yes, I did. Let’s go horseback riding.”

“Horseback riding it is.” He squirted a glob of white into his palm and made a circling motion with his finger.

Hailey pulled off her tank top and turned, gathering her hair in her hands. She closed her eyes, bit her lip as Austin rubbed his big, slippery hands over her shoulders, along her shoulder blades, and down her lower back. He snuck his fingers below the waist of her shorts, leaving a trail of fire wherever he touched. Hailey struggled not to shudder as the gentle pressure of callused palms tied her stomach into tight coils of need.

“I think you’re good.” Austin stepped back, squirting more lotion in his hand. He rubbed SPF-30 over his arms, chest, and stomach. “Do you mind returning the favor?”

“Huh?”

“Will you do my back? The last thing we want is to turn into lobsters on our first day of vacation.”

“Mmm.”

He held her gaze. “You okay?”

“Yes.” Her brain all but sizzled in her sexual fog. “Definitely. Turn around.” Hailey poured lotion in her hands, rubbed them together, pressed her palms to Austin’s smooth, muscled skin. She stood on her tiptoes, squeezing his neck and shoulders, making him groan. Her hands froze against his shoulder blades.

“I officially think you should change majors. Forget social work, Hailey—become a masseuse instead. I’ll be your number one client.”

She ran her fingers along his spine firmly, testing herself, testing him, as he let loose another grumble in his throat.

“I’m serious, Hailey.”

Was he
trying
to drive her crazy? Because it was working. Her own shoulder blades ached from the sexual tension radiating through the room. If they didn’t get out of here soon, she was afraid she might explode. “Uh, I think you’re all set,” she said a bit too breathily.

Austin turned, staring, as she added more lotion to her hand and smoothed it over her naked stomach, her chest, her neck. He pulled her against him, skimmed his knuckles along her cheekbone, lifted her chin with his thumb until they breathed each other’s breath.

Hailey clutched his wrists. She wanted him, wanted this, but not right now, not when she hadn’t left Mother Frazier completely behind. The bitter woman wouldn’t be allowed to mess with whatever this was she had with Austin. “We should go. Right this second.”

Austin stared into her eyes as he played the pad of his thumb over her top lip. “Later, Hailey. We’re going to pick up right here, later.”

She couldn’t hold back the shudder his promise brought. Nodding, she eased away.

Austin took the key from the side table, locked up behind them, and snagged Hailey’s hand as they made their way to the hotel lobby.