Hannah's Blessing (40 page)

To her surprise, Devlan continued to remain impassive. He held out his hand with a polite smile. “Nice to meet you, Mr. Vember. I admire your work.”

“And I yours.”

Devlan cocked his head, and his eyes narrowed suspiciously when Diana’s sharp intake of breath reached his ears. Fortunately Hannah came to the rescue by throwing herself once more at Devlan.

“Look, Uncle Devvie! I can dance now.”

She did a clumsy pirouette for him, and then waited expectantly for his applause. Instead he reached forward to hug her tightly again. His eyes appeared suspiciously moist. “Goodness, I missed you, little one,” he breathed into her golden hair.

“Well, we should get going,” Brad announced, scowling meaningfully at Diana.

She watched with growing panic. If Hannah and Brad left, she would be alone with Devlan. There was no way of knowing how that would turn out. “Why don’t you stay and let Hannah visit with Devlan for a while? That way he can go home in the morning.”

Devlan released Hannah and smiled at Diana. “No. That won’t be necessary. I’ve already got a time slot to leave tomorrow afternoon. I can still visit with Hannah after school.” He glanced down at the child. “Would you like that? Do you want me to visit with you tomorrow?”

“Oh, yes!”

“Then it’s settled,” he said triumphantly.

Diana clenched her teeth. She could not understand why Brad was not helping her. Instead her traitorous friend took a hold of Hannah’s small hand and led her to the door.

“We’ll be back in a little while,” he called over his shoulder.

As the door shut behind the pair, Devlan advanced even further into the apartment. His keen eyes took in everything, from the scattered dolls to the numerous paints. The cluttered scene left no doubt that they all shared an apartment. Devlan’s mouth thinned as he glanced around.

“I’m sorry for all the clutter,” Diana said as she came forward to clear off the small futon. “I haven’t been home long enough to pick up.”

“Home,” he repeated, as if not wanting to believe it. “You all live here then?”

“Yes,” she answered. “Brad took us in when we left California.”

Devlan’s head inclined slightly at her words. She saw his fists clench by his sides, but he showed no emotion in his angular face. The silence that followed hung heavily in the air, and Diana busied herself by returning to the small kitchen and drying the freshly washed dishes. Remembering her manners, Diana grudgingly spoke up. “Can I get you anything? Water, soda, tea?”

He shook his head in the negative, and silence once again fell.

Thankfully there was nothing about that would indicate an infant in the house, and Diana felt relief at the reprieve. How she would approach the subject was still up in the air, and she wished she could have had the chance to call Thomas first.

Devlan followed her in and took a seat at the small dining room table. He watched her work intently, and Diana felt his gaze burning her where it landed.

“You do look good,” he commented.

She gave him a sarcastic look. “I look chubby. Admit it, Devlan. I know I’ve put on weight. But it’s okay, I don’t mind.”

He smiled, though it did not quite reach his eyes. “So where did you meet Brad Vember?”

“I see,” she said. “Is this about Brad?”

His brows lifted over falsely innocent eyes. “No. I was merely curious to know who it was that stole you away from me.”

She threw back her head and laughed. But it was a nervous laugh, and she felt none of the humor she displayed. She could not understand how he could not see how much she still ached for him. “Brad is a friend of Allan’s. He sent me to him when I called for help.”

“Called for help?” He frowned, his despair plain in his intense eyes. “Why is it you’ll ask anyone for help but me? A complete stranger? You would even go to a man you had never met, but you wouldn’t come to me?”

Diana finished putting away the last dish before she answered him. “Look, Devlan, Brad is gay. He has absolutely no interest in me whatsoever. He’s been involved with Jimmy for as long as I’ve known him.”

Devlan had the grace to look surprised before he chuckled. “Jimmy? The one at the gallery?”

“Yes,” she said, unable to hide her own smile. “We’re all one, big happy family.”

Devlan came to his feet and approached Diana. She backed away until she rested against the counter. Suddenly she was transported back in time to the day he had first kissed her. Unconsciously her mouth opened for his kiss, but Devlan stopped too far away to touch her.

“Why are you here?” she asked, her tone revealing her irritation.

Devlan sighed. “I don’t know, Diana.” He nodded in the direction of the coffeepot. “Maybe we could share a cup of coffee.”

“You came here for a cup of coffee?”

His face broke into one of his heart stopping smiles. The sight brightened up the room in addition to his face. Diana longed to reach out and touch his shadowed cheek. She wanted so desperately to huddle within the strength of his arms. But she did neither, and her hands remained by her side. As he watched her, Devlan’s smile slowly faded, and his eyes began to gleam. Diana saw the look, one she had seen before, and quickly turned away before she exposed too much.

“No, I didn’t come for a cup of coffee.” His voice was warm, and he continued talking as she hastily filled up the coffeepot. “I don’t know for sure why I came. All I know is that all this time I’ve suffered, wracking my brain to figure out why you left without saying a word to anyone. I couldn’t figure out what I’d done to scare you away. And now you’re here, right in front of me, with such a simple excuse that I feel like I’m missing something.”

She refused to look at him for fear he would be able to see the lie on her face. “Missing something?”

“Yes, like there’s more to the story that I don’t know about. I mean, why run away so quickly, without even questioning me? What drove you to sneak off in the middle of the night without a word to anyone?”

Finally she turned around to face him, her eyes again filled with tears. She wished so desperately that she could tell him the truth. Tell it all to him. About the baby, about Roxanne’s visit. But it would do no good. He made it plain earlier that his offer was no longer valid. She had already hurt him so much.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I never meant to hurt you. I was so scared.”

“Scared? Of what?”

She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter now, does it?”

Devlan reached forward and took a hold of her arms. His eyes burned with urgency. “It does matter. I think it does.”

“Devlan, please.”

“I need to know, Diana. It does matter to me.”

“There are other things to talk about now. We shouldn’t be looking at the past. We need to discuss the future,” she said quickly.

“I’m still stuck in the past.”

Diana struggled to catch her breath. Things were moving so fast. Devlan’s warm grasp was burning her arms, and he was so close she could smell the familiar scent of his cologne. It was the same scent that she had fallen in love with so long ago, and it hurt her so much to be so close to him again.

“It shouldn’t matter anymore, Devlan. Please. I’ve tried to put you out of my life, to move on. Don’t make it any harder than it has to be.”

Devlan inched closer in the small kitchen, and his breath fell heavy on her upturned face. It smelled like mint, like the freshness after the rain. “You’re so wrong. I will always be in your life, no matter what. We shared something that was very special. You can’t deny that.” His voice grew husky as his face lowered to mere inches from hers. “Or this…”

He continued his descent, and Diana’s eyes drifted closed. She could not stop him, even if she wanted to. She felt the softness of his lips brush against hers just as the first cry went up. He froze where he was, his full lower lip just barely touching hers.

The cry came again, and Diana squeezed her eyelids together. Well, she had tried. Devlan released his grip on her and took a step back.

“That was a baby.”

Diana bit her lip as she nodded. Devlan continued to frown. “But I thought you said you and Brad…” His voice trailed off as he inspected her again. “You’re not chubby. You’ve...”

Diana stood so still she felt she could have been molded from clay. Devlan continued to fight against the odds, obviously afraid to admit the truth. Throughout his inner debate, Bryce’s cries grew stronger as he became more fully awake. Suddenly Devlan turned and stumbled down the hall, one hand reaching out to guide him along. The door to her room was opened, and he approached the small cradle by the light of the night-light while Diana scooped the baby up. A small burp broke the silence as the child moved, explaining his sudden wakefulness, and Devlan’s mouth hung open as he stared at his very likeness. His face appeared pinched, and it was void of any color. It was plain to Diana that he did not know where to go from here.

“This is my child.” His voice was soft, almost a caress.

Diana nodded. “Yes, that’s what I was trying to tell you.”

“And this child is the reason Thomas told me to contact him?”

Again she nodded. How dubious she had been. How selfish. The pain mirrored on his face was second only to hers. Yet she was the cause of his pain. It was her actions that had hurt him so terribly. “I never meant,” she stammered. But she stopped speaking for she knew she would only lie.

Handing him the small bundle, she watched as he took Bryce in his arms and held him close. Through her own tears Diana thought she saw some glistening in Devlan’s eyes. He held their child so close that Diana’s heart ached for them. They did belong together; she could not hide it.

Devlan raised his face from Bryce’s silky black hair and glared at Diana. “How could you have kept this from me all this time? You were pregnant with my child and ran away?”

She shook her head wordlessly. If only he knew how badly she had longed for him through it all.

“You realize that I will change my will to include this infant.”

“Bryce,” Diana offered.

“Bryce.” He again kissed Bryce’s warm head and rubbed his cheek against the soft skin, but his voice was like ice. “And you realize that I will take custody of this child.”

Diana reeled back as though he had struck her, and all the blood drained from her face. Was Devlan playing a cruel joke on her? Try as she might to deny it, the cold, hard look in his eye told her he was deadly serious. He handed the baby back to her, but one hand lingered momentarily on his small head. His voice was every bit as cold and clipped as his eyes when he backed from the room.

“My lawyer will be in touch with yours, Diana.” His voice was severe, as sharp as the edge of a knife. She had never heard him speak thus, and it frightened her to see him so angry. He took a step backwards, but his eyes still glared at her. Hating her. “I can see myself out.”

Devlan slowly backed from the room and out of Diana’s sight. She heard the door slam shut seconds later and collapsed to the floor. Sobs of heartbreak came forth as she lamented the loss of the man she loved - and the son she was bound to lose as well. 

Chapter 23

The door opened with a flash of light from the hallway. Diana was still on the floor, although she had moved until her back rested against the mattress of her bed. She squinted as Hannah reached up to flick up the light switch. Suddenly their room was illuminated fully with bright white light. It hurt her head, and her tear-swollen eyes burned in protest.

“Hi Mommy!”

Brad shushed Hannah and sent her back to the living room with the promise of a video. After reaching down and hugging her mother, she happily skipped out and left them alone.

“Jesus,” Brad said, coming to kneel in front of her. He took her cold hands into his own and gave her a light squeeze. “What happened to you?”

“He said he’s going to take him away.”

Diana cradled the sleeping child against her breast. There was no way she would ever give up Bryce willingly. No matter what, she would fight for her child.

“I won’t give him up,” she said fiercely. “There’s no way he’ll take him away from me.”

“Do you really think he meant it?”

“Of course he did. He doesn’t bluff, Brad.”

“If he’s that successful in business he must bluff,” Brad said dryly. “Think about it, he’s the king of cool.”

Unknowingly, Diana’s fingers went to the necklace Devlan had given her so long ago. She began to finger the heart shaped locket nervously, tugging it along the chain.

“I don’t know,” she whispered. “He was so angry. I’ve never seen him like that before.”

“Can you blame him?” Brad frowned at her. “It’s plain that he loves Hannah a lot, and she’s not even his kid. I don’t blame him at all for wanting to hurt you. I would too.”

“Thanks a lot,” she muttered. “Whose side are you on anyway?”

He reached forward and stilled her hands. “I’m on your side, Diana… I see that you love this man. Call me a romantic fool, but it bothers me to see you hurt so much. You want to trust him but you can’t, and that’s your problem. Maybe you should trust him more.” He glanced at the intricate locket. “What’s this anyway?”