“What happened to Wind Dancer? She was fine when I left a few minutes ago.”
“Oh, nothing. I think she walked through some thorn bushes while we were riding. Her front leg has a couple of bleeding scratches on it. I saw them right after you left. She’ll be OK, we just wanted to make sure they didn’t get infected.”
Lindsey nodded her head without saying anything, she was still too shook up about the latest event at Retreat House, her heart still slammed into her sternum violently. Maddie noticed Lindsey’s ashen appearance and her shaking hands.
“Enough about the horse. How are you?”
Lindsey replayed the events for her friend – the snake and Eli’s quick reflexes – all the while being careful not to look up lest her eyes give away her fear or the adrenaline rush that Eli gave her.
“Isn’t it weird how Eli always seems to save the day? It’s like he’s a superhero or something. By day, a mild mannered seminarian, but by night he’s the collared crusader!” Maddie rinsed soap from the horse’s body with the sprayer.
“Ha, ha. Very funny. I’m glad that he’s able to sense this thing, too, and is there when I need him to be. Like I said earlier, it’s like his spiritual calling makes him more attuned to the supernatural. This thing is driving me crazy, though! I’m thinking about calling an ordained priest or something. I can’t take the crap in that house anymore. I need someone to come in and get rid of it. My mom doesn’t believe me. And I think Eli is at a loss, too. If he knew how to banish it, wouldn’t he have done it already?”
Maddie put the hose pipe down and grabbed a thick brush. “No, I don’t think he’s more sensitive to the spirit, I just think he’s more attuned to
you
. I’ve seen the way he watches you, Lindsey.”
Lindsey rolled her eyes at Maddie, making it clear she disagreed.
“Lindsey, seriously though, have you thought about having a psychic reading done in the house, first? You know, have someone come in and see exactly what’s in there and why it’s being so vile?”
“I don’t know any psychics.”
“My aunt on my dad’s side is psychic. Let me make a couple of calls first, to see if she can do it. Just don’t mention it in front of my parents at the boil tomorrow night, OK? Aunt Sadie isn’t one of their favorite people, if you catch my drift.”
The little colt nudged Lindsey’s hand with is soft, velveteen nose. He looked at her then back to the pail.
Lindsey handed him another apple slice while thinking about Maddie’s idea. She didn’t care how it happened at this point, as long as the damned thing left the house. From the mischief that started it all right down to the snake on the porch just a little while ago, Lindsey had had it. Because, quite frankly, she was afraid the thing would find a way to harm her if something didn’t happen soon.
Thirteen
“Lindsey,” Aimee started over breakfast. “I’m going up to Columbia next week. I’ve got to do a weekend continuing education course so that I can renew my license. Clara, one of the nurses at work, and I are taking a two-day doula workshop that’s being offered while we’re up there, too. And, well, that’s where my birth grandparents are. I’d like to look them up. I normally wouldn’t take off like this, but it’s an opportunity for me to kill three birds with one stone. I can get all the C.E. hours I need to renew my license as well as learn some alternative techniques to help me out at work. Plus I get to look into my past.”
“Your who?” Lindsey said, looking up from her scrambled eggs.
“My birth grandparents. I know that you know, Lindsey. I saw the envelope from the lawyer’s office inside the bag you took to the water park. And I’m OK with you knowing, relieved actually. You deserve the truth. And so do I. So please, understand that I’m going to be researching my natural family and that it’s not a jab at Mom or Dad.”
Lindsey nodded her head slowly. She wanted to make a comment about how Gramma and Grandpa had been her ‘natural’ family but she held her tongue. Instead she said, “Alright mom. What’s that other thing you’re doing? Becoming a doula? What’s that?”
“Oh, there’s this growing fad of women having babies without any pain medication and they hire these women called ‘doulas.’ A doula is just supposed to be there to lend support to a laboring mom – give her back rubs, feed her ice chips, help her move around – that kind of stuff. But hospitals around the country are having problems with these women overstepping boundaries and giving out incorrect medical advice or even adjusting medications being given through the I.V. drip line. Some hospitals are even banning them because of their interference. A lot of nurses are getting doula certified so they can safely offer these services to women who don’t want pain medication.”
“I’m sorry, but if I ever have kids I want my epidural on tap when I arrive at the hospital.”
“I know how you feel, honey. But some women want the experience of a non-medicated birth. To each their own.”
“Wait, wouldn’t a doula be a nurse anyway if she’s going to be aiding in childbirth?”
“No. Anyone can be a doula. You don’t even have to have a high school diploma to go through a doula course. They’re not required to be licensed through the state, which is crazy because even a hair dresser needs a license to practice. Very, very few of them even have any kind of medical education. It can be very dangerous for someone who hasn’t stepped foot inside a collegiate classroom to dole out medical advice. They’re not all like that, of course, but it’s been bad enough that hospitals are laying down guidelines for their birth attendances. A lot of nurses are taking on this role so that they can help a woman have the birth she wants as long as it’s safely possible. It could be an interesting workshop. I can’t wait to hear what they’ll say about us big, bad labor and delivery nurses during this thing. Based on some of the posts on a few of the doula message boards I’ve been lurking on, we’re seen as agents of the devil.” She used her two index fingers to mimic devil horns on her forehead.
“That’s really not funny,” Lindsey shook her head. In light of the current situation, she didn’t think that making jokes about the devil or things that were evil was in anyway funny. “But why bother, really? If they don’t like you, why do you want to be one of them?”
“Because I want to be able to help each patient accordingly. Some women want to experience childbirth without pain medication. I want to learn techniques to help them with that goal. And who knows? Maybe I’ll change a few minds about medicated births, as well. Either way, I’ll be gone a week. Will you be OK?”
“Mom, I’m 18 years old. I’ll be fine. Besides, Eli is here and the Robbins’ are five minutes away. Plus, I’m glad that you’re researching your family.”
“That’s why I spend so much time with Darby. She knew Angela and is helping me work through some of my issues. I just haven’t wanted to burden you with any of it, at least not yet. We’ll talk once I wrap my own head around it. Anyway, I think this will be a productive trip, so I’m excited. But I will still worry. Columbia’s only an hour or so away, so I’ll be able to come right back if I need to.”
“Make your plans, Mom. I’ll be fine. Besides, I’ve got stuff to do anyway. I’ve got work and I need to get my schedule and books for school. Then I’ve got to shop for school supplies. I’ll be fine, Mom, really.”
Aimee had been off the last couple of days and needed to go to bed so she could get up for her next set of rotations later that evening. After breakfast she took an Ambien and went upstairs. Lindsey showered and got ready for work. Eli was on his hands and knees, planting flowers by front of the porch when she left for the Artisans Center.
After work, Lindsey went to Wal-Mart – the only major store within an hour’s drive – to get some bath supplies and to start stocking up on paper and pens for school. Aimee was getting ready to leave when she finally arrived home. They had been living like this for years now, only seeing each other in small intervals during Aimee’s “on” days. “Like two ships passing in the night” was how her mom described it.
Lindsey sat with her laptop resting on the arm of the sofa while eggplant parmesan baked in the oven. She heard Eli enter the room, his footsteps light on the wood floor.
“Would you like some company?” he asked.
Lindsey flushed and looked up. Eli stood near the kitchen counter, glossy violin in his hand.
“Yeah, sure. Do you play?”
“Yes. I was going to clean the old girl up. The weather here is a little more humid than I’m used to. Changes in temperature can mess with instruments like this. After I clean it, I can play you something if you like.”
“So you’re not from around here?” Lindsey had assumed that Eli was from the area since his Aunt Darby had been here her entire life.
He was visibly uncomfortable. “My family, well, they’re from up North.” It was obvious that he didn’t want to talk about it and Lindsey didn’t want to ruin the mood with asking him to discuss what seemed to be bad memories. Maybe a family dispute had been what sent him here to begin with. Were they angry that he’d chosen the priesthood?
He sat a small box on the coffee table and took a bottle of varnish cleaner, a cake of rosin, and a cotton cloth out of it. After he checked the bridge of the violin he rubbed the bow over each of the strings, taking his time to carefully tune the darkly varnished maple beauty. When he finished the tune up, he began to polish the wood using small, quick circles.
“Do you play any instruments?”
“No. I always wanted to learn to play the flute, be in the marching band, you know. But I never got the chance. Mom plays the piano, though.”
He took the long, horse hair bow in his hands next and removed old rosin from the strands. Once it was clean and the strings tightened, he took the cake of rosin, held it in a cloth, and rubbed it up and down the bow several times. When he was done, he put his supplies back into the box.
“Would you really like me to play something for you? You can say no, I won’t be offended.”
“I would absolutely love to hear you play.”
When she didn’t make a specific request, he smiled, put the instrument under his chin, and began pull the bow over the strings ever so gently. Back and forth he moved the bow, changing his angle a little with each stroke. The violin burst into song that nearly made Lindsey cry. Eli’s eyes were closed as if willing the music to pour from his soul and out through the violin. The song was familiar, but she didn’t know the name. Eli stood up as the music reached its crescendo, the violin’s angelic voice singing to her alone. He swayed gently as he played.
“Pachelbel’s Canon in D,” he answered her unasked question. “This next one is my favorite.”
He began to play a deeper, slower melody that she had not heard before. When she didn’t seem as enthralled, he stopped. “OK, so you don’t like ‘Ave Maria.’ But I have to admit that it is better with someone singing along, and since I’m certainly not a singer… Let’s see, how about this one?”
Eli began to play an upbeat piece that Lindsey instantly recognized. Her friend, Denise, had played this in the Bremen High School talent show last year.
“‘Ode to Joy!’ I know that one, at least,” she said, smiling.
Eli smiled in return and played as Lindsey took the food out of the oven. He transitioned from ‘Ode to Joy’ into ‘Fur Elise,’ before putting laying the violin on the counter and grabbing a plate.
They ate by the TV that night, chatting about the show they were watching and making plans to go fishing the morning. Lindsey wished Eli would pick the violin up again, but she knew he couldn’t eat and play at the same time. So, she started to think about tomorrow’s fishing trip. She wished they had a boat to go out in – she could imagine herself gliding across the glass-smooth surface of the estuary waters with Eli. She thought about what it would be like to have him sit behind her, wrapping his arms around her to show her how to properly cast a line. She imagined him realizing that he was attracted to her the way she was to him and what he might do while they were alone in the boat, with no one to witness except the birds nesting in the mossy trees above.
She had to shake those images from her head. He was here on retreat. He wanted to be a priest. He wasn’t any more interested in her romantically than he was in the cup sitting on the coffee table in front of them.
She was tired, but wanted to prolong this evening as long as possible. It was just too nice sitting here with him like this, but by 10 p.m. she couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer. So, she said her goodnights to him and went upstairs. She quickly changed into a pair of boxers and a tank top and crawled into bed. She fell asleep almost instantly, the mournful songs of the violin echoing in her mind.
Her dreams went back to her fantasy from downstairs. She was fishing with Eli, they were in a small dingy on the estuary and he was paddling them out to deeper waters. He wanted to catch some big fish for dinner. He took Lindsey’s pole and said he’d show her the perfect way to throw her line out. His tanned skin glistened in the sun and his smile stopped her heart. He moved closer, his face just inches from hers. He leaned in to kiss her. She waited. She had secretly wanted him to do that for so long.