Hard Corps (27 page)

‘Thank you, sir,’ I breathed, meaning it.

He kissed my mouth, my neck, trailing down my body to my wide-spread pussy. When his tongue flicked against the little bud of my clit I moaned, longing to thrust up into him, but mindful of his warning about moving without permission.

Eric kissed his way back up my body, leaving me almost desperate with desire, and straddled my chest, his strong buttocks resting lightly against my breasts. His large, thick cock was now poised level with my mouth. Without being ordered to do so, my lips had parted and my tongue snaked out, desperate for his beautiful penis. He eased forward slowly, until just the head was resting lightly against my lips. I eagerly began to lick and kiss the satiny, smooth skin, trying to suck him further into my mouth.

‘Remy, Remy.’ He laughed, his South Carolina accent rich like dark honey. ‘You are such a little slut. But I forgive you, this one time, because I want this too bad to stop and punish you for not waiting for permission to kiss me. You will learn, darling. You will learn.’

He eased the cock further in now, and slowly glided the shaft until it was lodged just into my throat. I opened to him, accepting it all, sucking, licking, adoring that cock as he began slowly, sensually, to fuck my face. I could see the image of us in the mirror on the wall, my legs and arms spread wide, tied to the bed, my reddened ass exposed, and gorgeous Eric straddling me with his strong legs across me, his broad back leaning over me as he arched and thrust into my mouth.

‘Are you mine, Remy?’ he asked, his voice husky with lust. I nodded, unable to speak, his cock stuffed down my throat. ‘Will you do whatever I want? Are you ready to suffer for me, to take what I give you, to learn grace and true submission?’

Yes, a thousand times yes, I would have screamed, had I been able. I was so deeply excited by this man, by his total and confident control, by his ability to arouse me so completely and so easily. And he wanted me! He wanted me for his slave girl! He wanted to use me till I dropped, to torture me until I cried, to love me until I died from pleasure.

The room was thick with the smell of sex, raw sex. I could smell his spicy, musky scent, mingling with our sweat, and my own wanton pussy juices. I was aching with need and I could feel the juice from my pussy actually tricking down my thigh. I was too far gone with lust to be modest about it. For the first time, I didn’t long to slam my legs shut, to hide my obvious desire. I just wanted him to come, to spurt his lovely hot jism down my throat. And I wanted him to fuck me, hard and fast, to give me at last the release I craved.

Eric moaned, thrusting harder, holding my head still with a hand on each side, gripping my hair. I was ready, ready for the sweet, salty tang of his release, but before he went too far, he stopped and pulled out, his penis shiny with my saliva and his own precum. I forgot my now-aching arms and legs as he began to kiss me again, on my lips, my neck, my nipples, his hands running sensually up and down my body.

At last, he began to kiss and suckle my aching, needy pussy. My body jerked convulsively; I couldn’t control the spasms of pleasure that wracked me. It was impossible to stay still as he had earlier commanded me, but luckily I was granted a reprieve as he said, ‘You may move, my darling. Let go and give in to me totally. Come for me.’

I did, arching into him as far as I was able, bound spread-eagle as I was. ‘Oh, God!’ I screamed, and then, remembering my place, said, ‘Please, Eric, please may I come?’ The last word was drawn out, as my poor, undisciplined body had already succumbed totally to his touch. I couldn’t have stopped that orgasm if I had wanted to.

He didn’t answer, but continued to kiss me fervently, fiercely, as I came and came, my body hot from the cropping and my own exertions. Before the spasms had totally subsided, he climbed astride my body again, this time kneeling over me so that his hard cock slid smoothly into my spread and sopping pussy. I was longing to close my legs around him, to take him fully into me as deeply as possible, but as he had reminded me earlier, I wasn’t the one running the show.

He began slowly to ease his rigid member in and out of my pussy, slowly, teasingly building the tension until I was literally whimpering with need for his thrust. Faster and faster, he began to fuck me hard now, slamming into me, our bodies slick with sweat, our breathing shallow and fast. I could feel from his rhythm that he was about to come and, as he did, he opened his beautiful, sea-green eyes and looked straight into mine. Our gazes held as he pumped his precious seed into me. It sent me over the edge and again I begged, ‘Please, oh please, can I come?’

‘Yes,’ he whispered.

*   *   *

From passion and romance to schoolbooks and olive drab. The transition was a difficult one, and I could barely concentrate at school. I was still a member of the Hard Corps, but for me the pleasure was gone. And the need.

I’d done what Amelia had asked, and given it one more try. The pony thing, while very odd, had been an interesting experience. And even though I had even managed to come, it was more a physical reaction to stimulation than any real sensual experience. My heart just wasn’t in it any longer. Someone had stolen that heart and I knew now with certainty that all I wanted to do was fall into Eric’s arms and kneel at his feet. It was as if the Corps had been a practice drill, a dry run. This was the real thing, and I wanted it and only it.

I told Amelia I was ready to talk things over with her again. As soon as we both were free, we met again in the SCU building for our final talk. I think she knew before I started what I was going to say, but she waited patiently for me to begin. I decided to dive right in.

‘Well. I don’t quite know how to say this. I’ve never thought of myself as a quitter. But I want out. Out of the Slave Corps. Maybe even out of Stewart.’

Amelia’s eyes widened in disbelief. ‘Out of Stewart? But this is your life! You told me you wanted to be an officer since you were a kid! And you’re halfway there. Why would you want to throw that away?’

‘Well, I haven’t decided that part for sure yet. But I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. I think I always wanted a military career because both my parents were in the army and that was what I knew. What I was comfortable with. What I thought I admired. I guess I never really examined my own motives. I just kind of decided back when I was a kid that this was what I would do, and then just stayed doggedly on the path without ever considering any options.

‘But like I said, I’m not yet absolutely sure that I want to leave the Academy. But I do want to leave the Corps.’

Amelia looked resigned, but sad. ‘I know the Corps isn’t for everyone. It certainly isn’t a substitute for romance, but it does have its own special offering: the chance to submit safely and in a variety of ways.’

‘I have nothing against the Corps, Amelia. Really I don’t. I guess I just can’t reconcile it with who I’m becoming. I find that I have lost the yearning, the flush of desire, and need to submit to strangers. I want something more. I can’t do it with sincerity. I would be betraying the Corps by staying in it when I feel like this. Surely you can see that.’

‘I do, I guess, though I can’t really relate, never having been in love myself.’

I went on, compelled to explain further. ‘I guess I’m seeing things in a different way. The Corps isn’t bad in itself. I think it’s great, as far as it goes. I’ve learned a tremendous amount about myself and about D/s. But somehow it isn’t enough anymore. No. It goes beyond that. It isn’t right anymore. Not for me.’

As much because I was dying to share it with someone, as to explain myself to her, I told Amelia everything. About meeting Eric, and what it felt like to add love into the equation of submission and SM. How it took things to a different plane. How it made the Corps seem like too much of a game for me now. And sometimes a game whose rules I didn’t like at all.

Amelia listened, rapt, sighing, and asking the occasional question. When I was done, she nodded, still looking a little sad. ‘I understand, Remy. You’ve found something I could only dream of. True love.’

‘Why do you say that? Why is that only a dream?’

‘Oh, come on. It’s me, Amelia. The fat girl with a nice personality. I love the Corps because here I’m treated like a total sex object. No one seems to mind if I don’t have a perfect figure. They still want to strip me and beat me and use me like the slut girl I am.’ Her eyes sparkled as she said this, and I couldn’t help but smile back. But she was way off the mark.

‘You are so wrong, Amelia. First of all, you aren’t fat. And you seem to be slimmer every time I see you. Not only that, you have such natural grace, such obvious sensual submissiveness. My God, who wouldn’t want to use you!’

Amelia blushed and looked down. ‘Remy, do you really think so?’ She spoke in almost a whisper, as if a sudden sound might make me admit that I was only kidding.

‘Of course I mean it. And when you get out of the Corps and give yourself permission to find someone, you’ll see. They’ll be knocking the doors down.’

‘Oh, I don’t want to leave the Corps. I feel safe here. Safe and in constant demand. A perfect combination for a girl like me.’

‘Well, I’m glad. I really am. I mean, that you should have this wonderful haven to explore your sexuality. It has been terrific for me, too. I just think it’s time for me to move on now. To continue would be to betray what I feel for Eric.’

‘Did he tell you to quit?’

‘No. Not once has he put the slightest pressure on me. So different from Jacob. It’s like he really cares about me. About me, not just about our shared passion for SM. He told me he would wait for me. A thousand years, he said, if that was what it took. Isn’t that romantic?’

Amelia giggled and then sighed. ‘Is it ever,’ she breathed. ‘Well, we better get down to business.’ She pulled out a stack of papers, all very formal and businesslike, from the folder she kept locked in a filing cabinet in the little room. ‘You just need to read these, and sign these contracts where the Xs are. It’s all pretty clear. Take your time. Read it all. I have to get to class, but just leave the stuff here and lock the door when you go. Don’t forget to return your key. I’ll be back later and I’ll get it to the right people. Don’t you worry. You aren’t the first person to quit the Corps. You won’t be the last.’

‘Thanks, Amelia. I can’t tell you what a terrific support you’ve been through all this.’

‘Oh, Remy. I like to think we’re friends. Not just here in the Corps, but in “real life” if you know what I mean. I hope you don’t transfer out of Stewart. I would miss you terribly.’

‘Well, if I do, I won’t be going far. Just over to Columbia, South Carolina. It’s only a few hours away. You can come out on breaks and visit. Who knows what might develop?’ I grinned at her and she reached over and hugged me impulsively. Then she said goodbye and was gone. I sat down, fingering the little gold key I had worn for so long, and was now giving up voluntarily. Reading the pages set before me, I attended to the business of setting myself free.

Things happened rather quickly after that. It was weird to just go to class and PT, knowing there were no special assignments waiting in my mailbox to send me off, naked and vulnerable, to be whipped and used by some master or mistress in the Corps. Other Corps members seemed to avoid me. I was off limits somehow. I had left the secret life, but still knew of its existence. It felt very lonely.

Eric and I talked on the phone every night. One day I asked him to look into what it would take to transfer to the University of South Carolina. ‘Oh, Remy! Do you really mean it? You would consider coming out here? To be with me? Oh, Remy! My heart is pounding.’

I laughed, delighted at his outspoken enthusiasm and pleasure. I was again reminded of the stark contrast between open, effusive Eric and tight-lipped, cautious Jacob. Everything seemed so easy with Eric, so right. With a few phone calls and a meeting with a guidance counsellor, I found it was very easy to change the entire path of my life. I was going to leave the Army I thought was in my bones and embark on something new with someone new.

During this process, I got a call from Dr Wellington. She had heard I was leaving, she said, and she wanted me to visit her in her office when I could get away. I went to see her, pleased that she wanted to see me, but prepared to object if she tried to talk me into staying at Stewart.

As I went into the chemistry building, with its constant vague, not entirely unpleasant smell of chemicals wafting from the student labs, and up to her small office, I smiled, remembering how very nervous I had been that first time I had gone for an assignment with her and the then-hated Ms Dillon. How things had changed! Now Jean and I were friends, and I had discovered a definite bisexual streak in myself that I was looking forward to exploring with my master to guide me. I felt comfortable at last with my own body and my orientation as a submissive.

I knocked lightly on her slightly ajar door and the professor beckoned me to come in. ‘Remy, how nice to see you. I hear you’re leaving us!’

I smiled, a little nervously, and said yes, I was. I was transferring at the end of the term.

‘So what happened, darling? Nothing in the Corps that ran you off, I hope — ’

‘Oh, no, Dr Wellington — ’

‘Please, Remy, call me Amanda. What is the point of such formality now? We are like old friends, after all.’ She smiled impishly, reminding me without speaking that I had licked her shaven pussy until she came in my face, and that she had watched me be whipped and then made love to by another woman. We were certainly ‘friends’, and intimate ones at that.

‘OK, Amanda, then. It has nothing to do with the Corps. At least not directly.’

‘A man, isn’t it? I see it in your face. You are in love.’

I felt myself blushing, and giggled, unable to suppress the little flutter of joy bubbling up through me. ‘I guess that’s true, though I can hardly believe myself that I would do something like this “for a man”. Definitely doesn’t fit my image of myself, or at least the one I used to have! But it isn’t really like that, anyway. I’m doing this for myself, not anyone else. I think I probably would have ended up leaving the Academy, and certainly the Corps, even if I hadn’t met someone.’