Harlequin Special Edition November 2014 - Box Set 2 of 2: The Maverick's Thanksgiving Baby\A Celebration Christmas\Dr. Daddy's Perfect Christmas (43 page)

As soon as she was seated, Kerfluffle darted over to Nora's lap and stretched out, obviously ready for some love. Why was the affection always on the cat's terms? Did she own the house?

“Now that you're here, I'll head on out.” Cameron came to his feet. “I need to run by the station before I go home.”

“You might as well throw a cot in your office and sell your house,” Eli commented. “And pop in over at Mom and Dad's because Mom was just saying how she hasn't seen you. She's worried.”

Cameron rubbed a hand over his face. His lids drooped and frown lines were becoming more evident. Whatever he was working on was draining the life out of him. Nora wanted him to relax and take some time off, but he was the chief and she highly doubted he'd ever get enough time off to truly benefit him.

“I'll stop in,” he told Eli. “Nora, please call me anytime. If you hear anything about the break-in or if you need something done around here. Don't sell just yet, okay?”

Eli's head whipped around. “Sell?”

Grabbing his own coat by the door, Cameron laughed. “And that's my cue to leave.”

Nora crossed her legs, rested one hand on her growing belly while the other stroked her tabby. “Stop staring at me, Eli. The Neanderthal thing is getting old.”

Resting his hands on his narrow hips, Eli continued to glare down at her. “Why are you moving? Todd always told me how much you loved this house.”

Nora closed her eyes, tipping her head back to rest on the cushion of the chair. “I do. But I can't keep up, and with only one income, it's just too much. The money from the VA went to the funeral. Todd had a meager savings, but apparently he had racked up some debt with a couple credit cards that I knew nothing about so the savings went to that. I'm just bouncing the idea around. It's a hard decision.”

Suddenly Eli was beside her, sliding his strong fingers over hers. Nora stared at the image of his dark, scarred hands over her pale, delicate ones. When her eyes came up to meet his, she saw pain.

“I'm sorry, Nora. I know you guys shared some good times here—”

Nora couldn't help the onslaught of tears as she shook her head. “No, we didn't. That's just it. There were no good times, Eli.”

Stupid pregnancy hormones. She hadn't meant to blurt out the ugly truth hiding between these walls. The life she and Todd shared wasn't picture-perfect, and while she'd love to blame him for the disaster that was their marriage, she had to be honest and take half of that blame. They were two loving people who never should've gotten married. Two people who should've remained friends and nothing more.

“Nora.” Eli reached up, cupping her face until she fully focused on him. “I'm not sure what went on with you and Todd, but I know he would want you to be happy.”

Oh, he had loved her in his own way, but not enough to stay married. Knowing that he wanted out of their marriage hurt her in a way she hadn't expected. But it was his death, so abrupt, so final, that nearly killed her.

This baby was giving her new hope and there was no way she would let her little girl down. Unlike her own free-spirited mother.

“I'll find a way to help you keep your house,” he vowed. “Trust me.”

“I don't want to talk about this,” she whispered. “I'm sorry.”

Sighing, Nora closed her eyes, not wanting him to see her own pain...her growing feelings toward him.

“You must think I'm the weakest person.” She laughed. “Every time you're around I'm an emotional mess. I swear it's the hormones.”

Eli gripped her hands again and smiled. That smile lived in her mind, her heart. That warm smile never failed to make her happier and bring back memories of better times.

“You're one of the strongest people I know,” he told her. “Man or woman. You get crap thrown at you and still continue to come out on top.”

Yeah, well, she felt like she was at the bottom of that crap pile and slowly crawling her way out.

As she raised her gaze to Eli, she smiled. Maybe he was just the hope she'd been needing. Maybe this attraction wasn't dead, after all, even though time and hard life lessons had kept them apart.

Nora didn't want to get her hopes up, but she couldn't deny she still felt that stirring in her gut whenever Eli was around. And from the way he looked at her, cared for her, she knew the attraction wasn't one-sided.

So what would they do about it?

Chapter Eight

L
istening to Nora declare her marriage wasn't all she'd wanted was like a punch to the gut. He'd heard Todd say things about Nora back home, but Eli assumed that was just Todd talking through depression of being in the war.

Eli knew Todd's secret, but he'd always assumed that at home Todd and Nora were happy—because Nora was in the dark, mostly. Wasn't this baby proof of their wedded bliss?

“I didn't mean to upset you,” he told her. “I guess I just assumed you and Todd had a good marriage.”

“We did...at first.” She let go of his hands to swipe at her damp face. “But we grew apart, out of love—if we ever truly loved each other beyond friendship. It happens. I would've stayed with him because it was the right thing to do. I mean, he was off fighting for our country and had a great deal of stress. I think the love just wasn't there. We were better at being friends than playing house.”

And war would test even the strongest of relationships. Eli had hated hearing about Todd's time with Nora over the past few years, but what could he say? Eli had walked away from the woman who would've spent her life with him. So all the torture had been his own fault.

“He did love you,” Eli stated. It was so important that she knew because Eli never doubted that Todd loved Nora; he just happened to love another woman, too. A secret Nora could never know. “He talked about you all the time, so don't doubt it.”

Eli may have fudged the truth a tad, but he didn't want Nora's memories of her late husband to be tainted or for her to feel guilty for the marriage that wasn't everything she wanted, everything she deserved.

Nora smiled. “Thank you for telling me.”

Gripping her hands again, he pulled her to her feet. “I know it's late, but I have an idea.”

Nora laughed. “You've got that look in your eyes.”

“What look?”

“The one that says you're up to something. Remember, I knew you and your brothers when you were troublemakers. I know when you're plotting.”

Eli shrugged. “I'm older now and a little more reserved than I used to be.”

Nora quirked a brow. “Reserved? The St. John boys are anything but reserved.”

“Well, we're calmer now.” He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and steered her toward the kitchen. “What do you say we make a batch of Snickerdoodles?”

Nora groaned. “You know my weakness.”

“Hey, who said anything about you? I didn't have any dessert tonight and I can't remember the last time I had homemade Snickerdoodles.”

Smacking his chest playfully, Nora laughed again. Music to his ears. Anything he could do to keep her smiling and not living in the past full of heartache was worth it. Besides, he still wanted an excuse to be with her, to talk to her, look at her. He'd missed so much time with her because he'd purposely distanced himself, but right now the last thing he wanted was distance.

He was torturing himself by spending all this time with her. But he could no more leave than he could stop this pull of renewed attraction toward her, and damn if that didn't complicate his life even further. He thought being back home would be fine, somewhat difficult but doable. He had no clue how fast and hard Nora would tumble back into his life in a fresh, new and terrifying manner.

In the process of making cookies, they moved around her kitchen, adding ingredients and working together. And by working together, they regressed to their youthful days by throwing flour at each other and making a pretty good mess.

“Now who's going to clean this up?” she asked, smiling as she glanced around the flour-covered countertops and wood floor.

Eli shrugged. “I'd say the same people who made the mess.”

“Really?” The tone of her voice, the naughty grin she offered him, scared him...and completely turned him on.

Before he knew it, she'd taken an egg and smashed the shell overtop of his head. Yolk ran down the sides of his head and Eli couldn't help but laugh...and retaliate.

In an instant he'd cracked one atop her head, too, and she looked right up at him and laughed. Before he knew it they'd tossed more flour at each other, accidentally knocking the sugar canister to the floor. Kerfluffle darted through the room, glanced at the mess and darted back out.

When Nora started to back away from Eli, she slipped on the tiny granules. In one swift move, Eli grabbed her around her waist, hauling her up against his chest.

Her rounded belly bumped against his stomach. He loved the feel of her pregnant, loved how beautiful she looked growing with a child she already loved so much. No, the baby wasn't his, but the woman...

No, she wasn't his, either, no matter how he wished for different circumstances.

“You okay?” he asked, helping her upright.

Nodding, she kept her eyes locked on his. She licked her lips and tried to push her egg-soaked hair from her face. “I guess we should start cleaning up.”

He needed distance. She felt too good in his arms, smelling sweet and tempting just like he'd remembered. The playful way they clicked into place had even more memories rushing to the surface, threatening to take control over his common sense.

How could everything between them still feel so right after all these years? Shouldn't they feel awkward around each other as if trying to get to know each other again? Yes, they were totally different people, but that strong bond of friendship apparently tied them together no matter what had passed between them—time or marriage.

Every moment they were together they clicked on some level. Which just went to prove the bond they'd formed as teens was impenetrable. “Why don't you go shower? I'll clean up in here.”

She tipped her head. “But you're a mess, too. I have a shower down here if you'd like to use it before we start cleaning.”

Oh, no. No way could he shower in the same house knowing she was in the shower, too. Temptation was something he was taught to avoid and Nora threatened to drive him positively mad.

“I'll be fine,” he assured her, fighting his inner-demon. “You go on. I'm sure there will be plenty for you to pick up when you're done.”

She only hesitated a second before she nodded and left the room. Once he heard the bathroom door close upstairs, Eli rested his hands on the counter, the edges biting into his palms. With his head hanging between his shoulders, he let out a long breath.

While he didn't want to shower here, he did want the sticky, runny egg off his head and to take this breather to focus on rebuilding that wall of defense where Nora was concerned. He couldn't get wrapped up in her again. He knew his heart couldn't take another beating and walking away this time might be even worse than the last. He had a major promotion he'd been champing at the bit to get and Nora was expecting a baby. There was no way they could overcome all of that and attempt to rebuild anything stable.

After he grabbed the shampoo from the downstairs bathroom, washed his head in the sink and then toweled off, he went to work in the kitchen.

He found a broom and dustpan in the utility room off the kitchen. The sugar-flour mess on the floor was quickly cleaned up, as was the disaster on the countertop.

He'd just wet a rag to go over the stickiness on the counter when he heard Nora step into the kitchen.

“Wow, you made quick work of tidying up,” she told him, glancing around the room.

But he didn't see anything but her, standing in a short, pale-blue fleece robe. The ties pulled together just above her rounded belly, showcasing the baby bump.

Even the little blue slippers on her feet were cute.

But it was the damp hair that hung in long, golden rope-like strands over one shoulder that drew him in. Her face was scrubbed clean and glowed with a soft pink tint.

She was everything he wasn't—everything he'd lived without for years. Soft, delicate, almost innocent in her own sweet way. He hadn't been lying the other day when he'd told her images, memories, of her is what got him through the hard times when he'd been overseas.

When her eyes landed on him, she froze. He couldn't do this. The ache he felt for her was too strong, too much to bear while trying to hold on to some type of sanity.

Eli crossed the room to her, watching her eyes widen. She tipped her head up to keep her eyes on his. As his body brushed against hers, Eli brought his hands up to frame her face.

“I can't lie to you, to myself,” he whispered. “I need to touch you, Nora.”

He didn't give her a chance to stop him. Another second without her would've destroyed him. Eli captured her lips with his, relieved when she opened, letting him in.

Delicate hands slid up his arms, then clutched at his shoulders. The familiar taste, the familiar touch, of Nora sent sensations shooting through his body that he hadn't felt since the last time he'd truly kissed her...and that peck the other day didn't count.

A slight moan escaped her as he changed directions of the kiss. His hands moved to the tie at the robe and quickly had it falling open. Sliding his hands up her sides, encountering silky material, only made her moan again. When he reached her breasts, she arched into him.

This is what he'd missed. Nora's instant response to his touch. Nora's vibrant passion.

Nora. All of her.

When he started to slide the straps of her nightgown aside, her hands came up to grip his wrists.

“Eli,” she panted against his mouth. “We did this once. It didn't work and...I can't do heartache again.”

Resting his forehead against hers, Eli closed his eyes and nodded. She was right. How could he be so selfish and try to take something she was probably willing to give, all the while knowing he'd walk away?

Hadn't her husband done the same thing? Sleep with her and then leave, whether for deployment or another woman's bed? Not that Eli would ever cheat on her.

Either way, Eli was no better because he was looking at the here and now instead of the future. A future for him and Nora simply didn't exist.

As he eased back, he pulled her robe closed and tied it back above her belly. Once he met her eyes, his heart clenched.

Sadness, regret, passion—they all stared back at him.

“This is hard for me,” he admitted. “Being back here with you, discovering the woman you've become, makes me want more. This is so much different than before.”

He cursed under his breath and scolded himself for opening up too much. Letting that vulnerability seep out was a sure way to end up hurt.

Nora reached up, stroking his face with her delicate hand. “We each made choices of where we wanted to be, Eli.”

“I hated being torn in two. When I left here...”

He shook his head, knowing he couldn't bare his heart too much more or he'd make an utter fool of himself.

“I'm selfish,” he told her, cupping her hand beneath his. “But I can't think around you.”

“I know,” she whispered. “I feel it, too. I wish I didn't, but I do. This is a complication neither of us need right now.”

He touched his lips slightly to hers once more because his willpower was pretty much nil around her. “I promise to be on my best behavior from now on.”

Nora looked up at him and smiled, nearly melting him on the spot. “I've seen your best behavior, Eli. You'll have to try harder.”

Smoothing her damp tendrils from her forehead, Eli kissed her there. “For you, anything.”

Stepping back, he released her, hating the chill that enveloped him at the loss of her body's heat. “I'll be here Thursday to cook as promised. Saturday, if you don't have plans, I have a surprise for you.”

“A surprise?” she asked, quirking a brow.

“A friend surprise,” he corrected. “You in?”

“I'm a little scared of your surprises,” she told him, crossing her arms over her chest. “I still remember that time you surprised me with a day at the lake, and when you talked me into skinny-dipping, your brothers had been hiding and they took my clothes. I still say you knew all about that.”

Eli had honestly forgotten that time, but as the memory flooded to the surface, he burst out laughing. “I can admit now that I knew they were up to something, but I didn't think they'd take your clothes.”

“Why didn't they take yours?” she asked, still smiling.

“They were teenage boys. They'd much rather see you naked than me.”

Biting her lip to suppress her grin, Nora nodded. “Well, as long as my Saturday surprise is nothing like that, then I'd be happy to free up my day for you.”

Warmth spread through him and he seriously felt like the nerd in school getting asked to the prom by the head cheerleader. Only this was Nora, and she was so much more than anything he'd ever been rewarded with.

“Great. I'll be here tomorrow and dinner will be ready when you get home.”

She moved across the room and pulled out a drawer. “Here,” she said, holding a key out to him. “This is a spare. If you're going to cook, you might as well keep it.”

A key to the kingdom...for a princess he didn't deserve.

“I'll see you tomorrow.”

Grabbing his coat and leaving out the back door, Eli hurried home. The blast of cold air didn't do a thing to help the heat spiraling through him after having his mouth, his hands, on Nora.

No more. He couldn't do that to either of them again. He was only teasing himself into thinking he could have anything with her now. And she certainly had enough on her plate without worrying about him pawing at her again.

Tomorrow when he cooked for her, he'd be just her friend. Even if it killed him.