Hate Me (40 page)

5am

Aiden texts me, waking me up.
 

Hottie God:
 
I’m going to get X-rays this morning. Swelling is better than last night, but I can’t put any weight on it. Sorry if this wakes you up. I can’t sleep.

Me:
 
Does it still really hurt?

Hottie God:
 
Not as bad, unless I try to stand.

Me:
 
Text me and let me know what they say.
 

Hottie God:
 
I will. ifly.

Me:
 
ifly too, Aiden.
 

Things heat up.

French

I learn absolutely nothing in class this morning. My mind is too busy worrying about both Aiden and my trip tomorrow.
 

When Aiden walks into French class with a boot on his foot, I almost want to cry again.
 

“You didn’t text me,” I say.
 

“Sorry, I forgot my phone.”
 

“Should you be walking on it?”

“That’s what the boot is. A walking cast.”

“It’s broken?”

“No, just sprained. The boot will help support it, and I won’t have to deal with crutches.” He laughs. “Now we’re both Boots.”

I look more closely at his eyes. “Did they give you pain medication?”

“Yeah, I feel pretty good right now. About ready to fall asleep, though.”

“I don’t think you should be in class.”

“I wanted to see you.”

“Why don’t I see if Miss Praline will let me take you to your room.”

He raises his eyebrows at me. “That sounds even better.”

I tell Miss Praline that Aiden isn’t supposed to be in class because he’s drugged up and ask if I can take him to his room.
 

Thankfully, she gives me a pass.

I barely get Aiden situated on his bed before he’s pulling me onto his lap and kissing me hard.
 

Things heat up very quickly and soon he’s taking off my blazer and unbuttoning my blouse.
 

“I should probably lock your door,” I tell him, getting up quickly to do just that.
 

When I get back, he’s got his pants unzipped and the Titan unleashed.
 

I have to say that I never really thought boy parts were particularly attractive.

Until now.
 

But, then again, everything on Aiden’s body is perfection.
 

In my eyes, at least.

He pulls me back onto his lap and resumes his hard kisses, his hands simultaneously finding their way under my skirt and pushing my panties aside, so that . . .
 

I can barely even describe it, I’m so overwhelmed.

But my parts are touching his parts.
 

All I would have to do is push up a little, then slide back down on top of it and we’d be doing it.
 

When Mom had surgery a couple years ago for tennis elbow, they told her not to make any big decisions when she was on pain medication. Not to sign anything. That her judgment could be impaired.

Would it be bad of me to take advantage of Aiden while his judgment is impaired?

As he’s sliding me back and forth on top of him, I don’t care about his judgment. I just want to do it.

But then I look deep into his eyes.
 

I feel the heat.
 

The hunger.
 

But not the connection.
 

His eyes don’t have the focus they usually do.
 

And I can’t do that to him.
 

I want him to remember every single detail of our first time.
 

Which means I have to get the heck off him or it’s going to happen by accident.

Like accidentally on purpose.
 

I roll so that I’m lying on the bed next to him, take the Titan in my mouth, and do what he enjoyed at the loft.

Aiden’s so damn cute afterward.
 

You’d think I just gave him a million dollars, let him watch porn, and made him a sandwich. The grin on his face is so contagious that I can’t help but smile too.
 

“We almost did,” he says. “You stopped it. I didn’t think you’d stop it.”

“If you weren’t all drugged up on pain medication, I wouldn’t have.”

“I made the trainer stop at the store so I could buy us a movie to watch tonight,” he says, the drugs obviously causing him to flit to a random topic.

“You did?” I say, humoring him. “What did you get?”

“
Clash of the Titans
,” he says, suppressing a laugh. “I also got the sequel,
Wrath of the Titans
.”

“Oh,” I say, realizing he’s still sharp as a freaking tack.
 

When I’m with Aiden, I never know whether to curse the gods for making him or praise them for doing so.
 

But for this, I’m going with damn the gods.
 

I’m just saying.
 

“Are you going to tell me about the name? And, more importantly, has it lived up to its name so far?” I can tell he is both teasing and serious.

I might as well tell him now. Maybe he won’t remember it.

“Do you know the story of the Titans?”

“Sure. They were the first gods before Zeus and all of those guys took over.”

“Right. So you know that I called you the God of all Hotties when I first met you.”

“I’m still in your phone as Hottie God.”

“Yes, you are. I thought you were so beautiful that you must be part god. You also seemed to always have this power over me.”

“What kind of power?”

“Like, I couldn’t think straight. Sometimes I thought you could read my mind. I’m pretty sure you’re infused with love potion. And when you kissed me . . .”

“When you kissed me, I was done for. Ever since that first kiss on the Ferris wheel. Totally and completely your love slave.”

“You didn’t act like it.”

“I was trying too hard, I think. But you were like uncharted territory. I had to make my own map. I was serious when I said that I did stuff for you that I’ve never done for anyone else, but I also know that, had I done it for any other girl, she would’ve been ripping her panties off for me. Instead, everything I did just seemed to piss you off.”

“Because I heard you were a player. I was still getting over B and, the way you made me feel, I was afraid of setting myself up for heartbreak.”

“And what do you think now?”

“That I’m setting us both up for heartbreak.”

He places his hands possessively on my cheeks, exactly the same way he did in St. Croix. Like he desperately needs me.

He gives me a single long kiss.
 

The kind of kiss that always affects me the same way.

Deep within my soul.
 

Telling me that we can make it through anything.
 

That we can survive the kiln.
 

Which, if I do what I’m thinking about doing, is going to get very hot very soon.

“So, tell me the rest of the Titan story,” he says, changing the subject again.

“Remember that day, when you got mad at me about wearing Dawson’s jersey?”

“Because I said you were dumb?”

“Exactly. And then you went all Alpha Aiden, threw me across your desk and attacked me.”

“Alpha Aiden?”

“Yes, you finally took control. Showed me how you felt. It was hot. Like the kitchen counter. The pool table. Anyway, my legs were spread apart and I could feel you were excited. And the way you were kissing me, I thought maybe we’d do it, you know. Then and there. And I wanted to. I don’t know, my brain just thought
Unleash the Titan
in the heat of the moment.”

“I wanted you too. But I didn’t want to be . . .”

“I know,” I say, rubbing his hand. “I’m glad now that we didn’t. And I was so freaking happy that you finally kissed me with your tongue that I didn’t care. But, see, if we watch the movie tonight, you’ll know that I got it wrong. The Titans wanted to unleash the Kraken, so that the people would hate the gods, which would, in turn, make them less powerful. So, technically, that should’ve been its name.”

“But in the heat of the moment you couldn’t think straight?”

“Exactly.”

“I like Titan better than Kraken.”

“I do too.”

“Have you ever named a guy’s,” he gestures toward his crotch, “before?”

“No.”

“Even better,” he says with a grin.

Writing the script.

6:25pm

I order Aiden some Chinese food, give him a pain pill, and stare at his beautiful face as he sleeps.

And I know.
 

Know what I have to do.

Know that I can’t lie to him any more.
 

That I can’t wait until March to tell him the truth.

That I’m going to tell him after the dance.
 

In our hotel room.

And that I’m going to do it
before
we go any further.

I know there’s a definite chance that he’ll hate me.
 

That he’ll walk away.
 

That he won’t understand.

But I can’t do it with him until he knows all of me.
 

I want him to know all of me.

So I spend the rest of the evening writing and rewriting the script.
 

THE SETTING: HOTEL SUITE AFTER WINTER FORMAL.
 

AIDEN

(Opening a bottle of champagne)

KEATYN

(Lighting all the votive candles Aiden brought)
 

(They kiss)

I need to tell you something.

AIDEN

(Sits on the edge of the bed)

What?

KEATYN

(Stands in front of him)

I’ve been lying to you. Actually, I’ve been lying to everyone about something. And I need you to know.
 

AIDEN

(Looks concerned)

Okay.

KEATYN

I came to Eastbrooke because I was being stalked. My last name isn’t Monroe. Well, technically, it is because it was legally changed, I think. I’m not really sure about that. I used to be Keatyn Douglas. And my mom doesn’t work in oil and gas. But she is in France. And her name is Abby Johnston.

AIDEN

(Stands up in shock)

When I get back to my dorm, I find another present wrapped with a pink ribbon.
 

I open it and find a teeny pair of boy short undies with two words written across the butt.
 

I smile at them, now certain Riley is my naughty Santa, and pack them in my bag to wear tomorrow night.

Then I work on a special gift for Vincent.

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 15TH

For being you.

7:25am

Aiden stops by my dorm before he goes to breakfast.
 

He sees me dressed in normal clothes as opposed to my uniform and says, “I forgot you’re going back to California today. Are you sure it’s safe?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

“Do you want me to come with you?” he asks sweetly.
 

I smile at him, remembering the last time I saw my dad. I wonder if he would’ve done anything differently if he had known it would be the last time he’d ever see me.

“No, Aiden. But I want to thank you.”

“For what?”

What do I say? What are the last words I want him to remember?

“For being you, Aiden. For being
everything
.” I turn away, pretending to look for a bracelet because I’m not able to look into his beautiful green eyes.

He turns my chin toward him. “You’re coming back, right?”

“I sure hope so,” I say with a grin, trying to making light of it.
 

“I hope so too,” he says, kissing my forehead.
 

I hug him tightly, kiss him passionately, and then watch as he limps up the hill toward class.

I go back into the privacy of my room and make a few more phone calls.

It’s perfectly perfect.

10:30am

Cooper texts me as I’m en route to the airport.