Heads You Lose (35 page)
Authors: Lisa Lutz
Lisa Lutz
would like to thank Marysue and Stephanie for their patience and friendship; the entire LGLA team for all their hard work; Morgan, Steve, and Julie for too many things to list; Jay and Anastasia for Sanjit (R.I.P.); Warren for
The Fop
; Kate for her brain; Pedram for the medicine; Las Hermanas for the peace and quiet; and Dave for being “game.”
Take it easy, Dr. Thesaurus.
What Now?
could be a good title.
Seriously.
So you do still have that dictionary I bought you.
Hmm. Does the cat really need a backstory?
Thank you for the explanation. I am aware of the term.
Okay. That’s enough.
Like
Nightcrimes
?
How about you matriculate into a plain English course?
What, you can’t come up with one of your own?
I suppose I should be grateful that you didn’t waste a paragraph summarizing an episode.
Indeed.
I hope you enjoyed yourself here.
Maybe you should just get a cat so you can stop writing about fictional ones.
I’m flattered by the homage, but who would watch this? It sounds like a rip-off of
The Uncrushables.
I almost forgot that Tate was such a pushover. I just hope Lacey doesn’t find out in an even-numbered chapter that he’s a little tougher than this.
Are you insane? Latin?
What the hell is going on here? Is this the same novel?
We’ll talk about this later.
And this.
I’m not even going to bother looking this one up.
At some point you’re going to run out of leads to destroy.
It was a highly emotional situation, and Lacey’s not a professional detective.
Give it up.
Or solitaire.
Agreed.
Can he feel my eyes rolling too?
This would actually be pretty easy—they’d stand out. On a separate note, why does this process sound familiar?
Funny how there’s a doctor in the room yet Lacey’s doing the examination.
Wow. Paul sure got over his grief quickly. Show some respect. A man just died.
Shut up and write.
Really a combination of these two very different things? Was there a sale at Wal-Mart?
Are you referring to Judge Milton C. “Hardcastle” from the 1980s television series
Hardcastle and McCormick
? How many people do you think are going to get this reference?
A response to adversity that sounds a lot like a certain coauthor’s.
Where’d you pick this up,
Farmer John’s Almanac of Baffling Non Sequiturs
? Do yourself a favor and leave the homespun wisdom to me. Or I’ll be as ornery as a polecat in a bucket of thumbtacks.
Not a bad title:
Burn Day.
Why, thank you.
I take that back.
Remember my rule: If the spell-check doesn’t recognize it, don’t use it. And when did Paul’s vocabulary get so big?
Sounds a little similar to my night-vision chapter, but I’ll take it as an homage.
And yet, he’s being the perfect Shaggy.
We both know you’re doing this just because I hate cat mysteries.
Taxes? He’s an orderly dude.
If you really loved Irving, you would stop writing about him.
How’s Paul supposed to help solve the murder if you always incapacitate him in your chapters?
I like how you’re conjuring your dream girl in Brandy. Key word “dream.” You do understand that no real woman can live up to these obscure and outrageous expectations.
What is this, Kinko’s?
You got that right.
Really? You’re thanking a cat!
ALSO BY LISA LUTZ
The Spellman Files
Curse of the Spellmans
Revenge of the Spellmans
The Spellmans Strike Again
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