Hearsay (18 page)

"It isn't that I don't want to listen…" He pushed Roman's thighs apart and placed himself between his legs. "I just don't believe you mean it."

Roman groaned and buried his face in Derrick's neck. "You're killing me."
 

The feeling of Roman's soft lips against his neck made Derrick shiver. Had they not been in the middle of what Derrick knew was a very important conversation, he would've turned his head and kissed the man silly.

But this was a turning point in their relationship. Derrick needed to get them to the right place before he could indulge in more than a few kisses.

He pulled back and grasped Roman's head between his trembling hands. "Is the fact that you're my boss troubling you?" he asked when Roman looked him in the eye.

Roman shook his head and covered Derrick's hands with his own. "It could be perceived as sexual misconduct, but there are no laws against it."

"Meaning being together is a discretionary issue," Derrick said in a gentle tone.

"In more ways than you think."

"Considering we have awesome chemistry and our compatibility is off the charts, I'd say the decision should be a no-brainer."

"It isn't that simple."

Roman's eyes were wide-open windows to his conflicted soul, with desire and trepidation shining equally in the green depths. It killed Derrick to see him so torn... to know he was probably causing Roman's emotional pain.

But he couldn't stop now. Roman was like a ripe fruit ready for Derrick's consumption. He might be battling his desire, but he wanted to be defeated by it. It was obvious in his thick swallows and the way he held his breath. It was Derrick's job to give him the slight push he seemed to need.

"Let it go, Roman," he begged. "Whatever it is that's kept you away from me all this time… you need to let it go."

Roman's head shake was more emphatic this time. "I
can't.
"

"Yes, you can!"

"Derrick…"

"I won't let you withdraw from me." Derrick stated. His tone was firm, but his voice was shaking. He couldn't help it. "I can't go on pretending we never connected, or that I don't get weak in the knees and butterflies in my stomach whenever I'm around you." He gulped and used his thumbs to caress Roman's cheekbones. "And you feel the same way. I know you do, so don't bother to deny it. You want to be with me as much as I want to be with you, and not even an entire year of staying away from each other could change that fact."

Roman stayed quiet, but Derrick could read his compliance in his flushed skin, his parted lips, and the way in which he absently stroked Derrick's hips with slightly trembling fingers.

Then he licked his lower lip quickly and hugged Derrick around his waist, and that's when Derrick knew for sure he had won their battle of wills.

He. Had.
Won
.

Now it was a matter of rewarding both Roman and himself.
 

"Would you please stop looking like the cat that got the cream?" Roman asked in a tone that was much more reminiscent of the one he used when they used to meet by the Gapstow Bridge. It was sensual, teasing… full of mischief.

"Not yet," Derrick conceded in a playful tone, "but I certainly caught the canary."

"Nothing can happen during work hours," Roman warned.

Derrick slid his fingers through Roman's silky hair. "But something
will
happen afterwards, and on weekends… and holidays too, right?"

"I didn't say that."

Derrick flashed a cheeky smile. "It was implied."

"Not quite," Roman chuckled. "You're reaching, Counselor."

It took great effort on his part, but Derrick managed not to growl in frustration at Roman's stubbornness. If the man didn't get with the program, Derrick would be eighty before they walked down the aisle.

"How about dinner tomorrow night?" Derrick suggested. "My fried chicken is
really
good."

It belatedly occurred to him it would've been a good idea to come up with a fancier menu. After all, he was trying to entice one of the richest bachelors in New York City to have dinner with him, and he doubted anything fried was part of Roman's regular diet.

But Derrick came from a humble background. Before going to law school, he'd been raised mostly on grits, pasta, and dry beans. They were filling, cheap, and a source of protein. Difficult as it'd been, Derrick wasn't ashamed of his childhood, and it was important Roman knew he had absolutely no pedigree. Besides, he was half-black. Fried food was in his blood. Plus, he'd learned southern style cooking from his dad, and he wanted to show off.

"I'm almost forty-five years old," Roman noted with a self-deprecating smile. "Fried food could give me a heart attack."

"I'll keep you in good health," Derrick promised promptly. "It's in my best interest, you understand."

Derrick had every intention of growing old with Roman, but he kept that to himself. No use in spooking the man with his long-term commitment thoughts.

Roman's face lost some of its color, and he shook his head again, but he didn't ask Derrick to remove his hands from his face. "I shouldn't," he said in a tone that sounded a little anguished. "We haven't talked about what kept me away. There's a chance things may go awry once you've heard what I have to say."

"Are you worried I'll turn into the same kind of vindictive prick that guy you were involved with at some point this past year was?" Derrick asked carefully. "You have my word I won't sue you for sexual harassment if things go pear-shaped between us."

Not that Derrick had any intention of letting that happen. He and Roman would live happily ever after, just like in fairy tales.
 

Roman frowned and leaned back from his touch. "I beg your pardon?"
 

"There are rumors," Derrick rushed to explain, knowing it wasn't his run-on sentence that had Roman stumbling a bit. "I've heard you had an affair with a guy named Bill… or maybe it was Finn… can't really remember. People say he sued you for millions of dollars, and you reached a settlement out of court to stop him from taking the story public."

"I have never been involved with an employee." Roman clarified immediately. "Not before you, anyway, and I certainly haven't been sued for sexual harassment." The deep scowl on his forehead was a clear sign he didn't appreciate having his honor questioned.
 

"What have you been sued for?"

Derrick didn't regret his question.

Not even when Roman pushed him out of the way and got up to pace around the conference room.

"Spousal support," Roman finally grunted. "I was sued for spousal support and a few other frivolous claims."
 

"You were legally married to James?" Derrick's shriek was probably heard on the first floor's security desk, but the last thing he'd expected to hear was that his future husband had had a previous marriage. "You never told me that you were legally married to James. Hell, same sex marriage wasn't even legal in New York when you guys got together. Did you make it official in 2011, or did you get married in another state?"

"We were never married, but we were together for about six years." Roman took a deep breath and stood in front of Derrick. His voice was steady and his gaze direct. "And even though the last few years were an absolute nightmare, James thought he was entitled to half of everything I own."

Roman didn't say why the last few years with James were a nightmare, and Derrick didn't ask. He wasn't interested in learning the details of that particular relationship. It was over and done with, and from now on Derrick intended to be the only man in Roman's life.

"He sued you after the breakup?"

That
was one detail Derrick wanted to know. If the guy was a gold-digger on top of the freaking idiot that had caused Roman a world of emotional distress, Derrick would hunt his ass down and have a come-to-Jesus talk with him.

"Although he didn't deserve a dime, I offered him some compensation," Roman explained. "But James's idea of 'some' was a rather liberal amount I happened to disagree with."

"So he sued you," Derrick repeated.

"And he lost." Roman's half-smile was feral when he added, "He was found liable for commencing a suit in bad faith with the purpose of harassing me."

"And he had to pay you."

"Through the nose," Roman confirmed. "Alan made sure to get every cent we could. I donated the money to charity after telling James I hoped he rotted in hell."
 

Oh my
.
 

It was confirmed. Roman's aggressiveness gave Derrick a hard-on as long as the Belt Parkway.
 

"I'd be lying if I said I'm sorry it didn't work out between you guys."

Derrick's blatant admission won him the biggest smile he'd seen on Roman's face since their daily lunch rendezvous in Central Park.

"By all means, Mr. Swain," Roman said with a laugh and a twinkle in his eyes. "Tell me how you really feel."

"Ecstatic." Derrick stepped forward and pressed a brief kiss on Roman's lips. "And you?"

"Scared out of my mind," Roman whispered after brushing Derrick's lips with his thumb. "I shouldn't do this without discussing a few things first."

"Are any of those things related to the reason you've kept me at arm's length?"

"Yes."

"Then I don't want to hear it."

"Derrick, I—"

"Shhh." Derrick pressed his index finger to Roman's lips. "I mean it. The only way I'd give up on us is if you told me you're in love with someone else. Everything else is irrelevant."

"It really isn't," Roman whispered around Derrick's finger.

"Are you in love with anyone else?"
 

Roman gulped and stared hard into Derrick's eyes. Obviously he'd noticed his choice of words, but ultimately pressed his forehead to Derrick's without calling him on it. "No."

"Neither am I." Derrick pushed Roman's head up and smiled into his eyes. "I only want you."

"Yes, but—"

"Ask me how I want you," Derrick ordered.

Roman frowned. "Why don't you just tell me?"

"Ask me," he repeated.

They stood toe to toe, and, for whatever reason, they didn't change positions. Derrick's finger remained softly pressed against Roman's lips, and Roman continued to talk around it. More than sexual or erotic, it felt intimate, which, in Derrick's opinion, was yet another reason to pursue this man. They were completely comfortable around each other, even though they had yet to go out.

Roman fought hard to deny his request, but a few seconds later he gave in. "How do you want me?"

It was a Herculean effort, but Derrick managed not to do a little victory dance.

"Tell me," Roman urged him. "How is it that you want me?"

Derrick sighed.

"I want you blissfully happy," he whispered. "Relaxed and spoiled rotten," he added, still shaking from head to toe. "Sexually satisfied… unraveled…" He removed his finger from Roman's lips and kissed him softly with eyes wide open. He didn't want to miss a single second of Roman's reaction to his words. "I want you to feel like the luckiest man in the world, and I want to be the one who'll make it happen."

Roman nodded once. His gaze was so intense Derrick wouldn't be surprised if it burned holes in his face. And his embrace… Jesus... his arms were so tight around Derrick's waist that his embrace almost felt desperate.

Derrick ran his fingers through Roman's hair again and again as he brushed soft kisses over his eyes, nose, and lips. He had no idea what was making Roman shake like a leaf on a tree, but at the moment, there was nothing more important than making sure he understood Derrick was here for him.
 

"That's good to know," Roman finally rasped against his lips. "I don't think anyone else could make me as happy as I know you would."

Roman traced Derrick's lips with his tongue. Derrick wound his arms about Roman's neck and opened his mouth. Their tongues met in a hungry kiss, scorching, ravenous, and insatiable. Derrick felt Roman's roaming hands on his back, his sides, and his ass. Then Roman's arms would hug him tightly and the exploring game would start all over again.

Finally
, Derrick thought, fighting the urge to strip them both of their clothes so that he could climb Roman like a tree.
Fucking finally!

He squeezed his eyes shut to keep his tears of joy from trailing down his cheeks, but he was too overwhelmed by feelings of relief and hopefulness. Not wanting Roman to see him crying like a little kid, he ended their kiss abruptly and buried his face in Roman's neck.

"Why were you so worried before?" Derrick asked with a shaky voice. "When you were on the phone?"

Roman sighed and rested his cheek on Derrick's head before he said, "I've been trying to contact a friend in the Manhattan District Attorney's office for the past two days. He's been unavailable every single time, whether I call his office or his personal number, and he's failed to return any of my calls."

"So?" Derrick sniffled softly.

"So I feel like he's avoiding me, and the only reason I can think for it is that your name popped up somewhere," Roman explained gently. "If that happened, he'd know you work for this firm, and talking to me about the Coleman case would not only be unethical, but grounds for disbarment. And the worst part is we might be too late to present any evidence to the Grand Jury. The prosecution may already have a True Bill."

Bile rose in Derrick's throat, but he forced himself to swallow until he was sure he wouldn't throw up all over Roman's pretty blue shirt.

It'll be okay… It'll be okay…

He took a deep calming breath.

"Speaking of…" Derrick turned in Roman's arms and wiped his face with the back of his hand. "I refuse to have this conversation on the grounds that this is probably the best night of my life. I…" He closed his eyes when Roman hugged him from behind. "I don't want it to get ruined," he finished in a small voice.

"Fair enough," Roman said. "How about we make it even better instead?"

"I'd really like that." Derrick smiled. "Let's leave the problems behind for a little while."