Heart's Ease (The Northwomen Sagas Book 2) (32 page)

They both slept bare in the warm months. He had always slept bare, except on a raid, and Olga had taken to doing the same, at least on her top, since her carrying and their son’s birth, so that she could nurse him easily in the night. Since her birth blood had stopped the week before, she’d been again coming to bed completely nude.

Her small body was beautiful. Her hips flared out a bit more since Magni, and her breasts were noticeably heavier, filled with nourishment for their son. Her belly was not so flat as it had been before, and there were a few reddish lines at each side. To Leif, she was now even more lovely than she had been.

And her hair flowed down her back, covering her bottom, like a dark, silken cape.

Leif appreciated the nearness of her bare skin each night, but it had been a struggle, especially in these days since her blood had stopped. He wanted her. He had not had her since before the birth, and he was going mad with need.

But their son slept between them in the night, and in the day, they were both bound by the responsibilities of their lives.

This was why Leif had built the cradle.

Olga went to pick Magni up from the cradle, meaning, Leif knew, to bring him into bed with them, where they slept all together each night.

But Leif caught her arm and pulled her around to face him. “Not yet.”

His wife smiled up at him. “No?”

“No. I want you. I need you.”

“
Jah
? You do?”

“Of course I do. I go mad with needing you.”

Her smile widened, and she came close so that her body was flush with his at every point. “I worried that you would not find me…desirable any longer. I don’t look as I did.”

“You look better. The changes in your body brought my son to me. I see the marks he made, and I want you. I see you holding him, feeding him, mothering him, and I can scarcely stay in my breeches for want of you. You have brought me everything I want in my life. You
are
everything I want in my life. When I am with you, my spirit is full, and my heart is at ease. I love you.”

He bent down, tangled his hands in her glorious hair, and kissed her as deeply as he could. When her arms came around his neck, he lifted her and carried to their bed.

While their perfect son slept quietly in his new cradle, Leif showed his wife exactly how much he wanted her.

On a gloomy day when the sun stayed hidden behind a shield of grey clouds, Olga stood on the pier and watched the ship carry away her friends. Twice in such a short space of days she had been given the gift of unexpected time with people she loved, and twice she’d had again to bid them farewell.

She was glad, so glad, to have had them close for any time at all, but standing here watching Brenna and Vali—and little Solveig, walking and talking now—sail from her again, mere days after Mihkel had been torn from her again, she could only feel the ache of melancholy.

Leif stood at her side, cradling their son. He put his hand on her shoulder, his arm across her back, and pulled her close. “We will see them again. And you will see your brother again, as well.”

Always, he seemed to know her thinking. She laid her head against his broad chest and picked up Magni’s little bare foot.

“He’s cold. We should take him back inside.” She folded his light woolen blanket over his legs.

“Yes,” Leif said and shifted to bring Magni even closer to his chest. “Another summer begins to wane.”

She sighed. “Winter is hard here.”

“Not so hard here as in Karlsa, I promise.” With a curl of his finger under her chin, he tipped her head up. “I will keep you warm. Mayhap we will make another child while we keep each other warm.” This light in his eyes told her that he was teasing more than planning.

“That is unlikely.” She didn’t understand how she had been able to have Magni, and she didn’t expect such a boon again. “I don’t want you to be disappointed.”

“I could not be. I have all I need right now. You and our son fill my life.” His expression became serious, and his blue eyes darkened. “And you, my love? Do you have all you need?”

Olga turned and faced the sea. The karve had headed to the north and was nearly out of sight. Her friends were gone. Her brother was gone. All she had in Geitland was Leif and her son. Was that all she needed?

It was. Leif’s love centered her. His steady spirit and faithful heart gave her a mooring. It was when she’d thought she’d been wrong about him that she’d been lost. Their love for their child centered her, too. Their small family was her home, and it was here. So she needed nothing more to be content.

But she had so much more. She had this town and the people in it, who came to her with their troubles and questions and trusted her to help them. She had lost her calling as a healer, but she had found—had retained—her purpose as a counselor. A leader.

She had dear friends, closer to her in spirit than any other in her life. Vali and Brenna, and Frida and Dagmar, and Jaan and Georg, might all have lived far from her, but they were close always, in her heart, and she knew she was there with them, as well.

And she had Mihkel, returned to her. She didn’t know whether she’d ever see him again, but at the least she knew that he had been well, that he was having a life he loved. He had found the adventure and the fortune he’d long ago struck out in search of.

She had lost much in her life. But she had also gained more than she had ever dreamed.

Loss and gain. Dark and light. Pain and joy. Such was life. It was the way of things. The world kept its balance.

Olga smiled up at her golden giant holding their mighty child in his arms. “Yes. All I need and all I want. My heart is at ease.”

Susan Fanetti is a Midwestern native transplanted to Northern California, where she lives with her husband, youngest son, and assorted cats.

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