Heartsong (Singing to the Heart Book 2) (23 page)

He held her for several moments as their breathing returned to normal. As he let her legs slide down to the floor, he kissed her tenderly.

She grinned up at him. “Water conservation, huh?”

With a smile he knew was cocky, he shrugged, then picked up the bar of soap and relished the way her eyes darkened with desire as he lathered it over his body. She shook her head as if to clear it and faced away from him to wet her hair. He squirted a small amount of her shampoo into his hand, caught up her damp hair, and worked the soap into the silky strands.

“Emm…” She leaned back against him as he caressed her sculp. “I love when you wash my hair.”

He leaned over her shoulder to kiss her neck. “I love washing your hair.” He turned her around. As the water sprayed over her, rinsing out the suds, he tilted her face with his thumbs under her chin to force her to look at him. When she met his gaze, he said, “I want to wash you for as long as we live, Michaela.”

“No, you don’t. Once we’ve adopted Jesse, you’ll want out of this marriage.” She shook her head and tried to back out of his grasp, but he held her.

“When will you stop running from your feelings? I know you love me. When will you let yourself believe that I love you? Yes, I made a horrible mistake when I left with Andrea. I didn’t know your ultimatum was out of fear, not out of lack of love for me or your disbelief in my dreams. I know your father hurt you by leaving, and his lack of love is what you’re afraid of. I’m not Lemont. I may have left you once, but I was so wrong.” She closed her eyes, and he rubbed his thumb over her cheek. “Michaela, I’m sorry I didn’t come back. But I’m here now, and I will never leave you again. Even if this mess I’ve found myself in ends up costing us Jesse--”

“Don’t say that.” She opened her eyes and gripped his forearms. “We will get him, Gabe. We have to.”

He took a deep breath of the steamy air scented with Jasmine. “Then we will.” He made sure the soap was out of her hair and kissed her gently on the lips. “C’mon, let’s get out of here before we use all the hot water and turn into prunes.”

* * * *

Micki wrapped a fluffy towel around herself. She couldn’t look at Gabe, as doing so would only complicate her sudden desire to never let him go. Could she believe him? Did he truly love her?

A sudden sensation of hunger made her nauseous. She put her hand over her belly and flinched. “I hope I didn’t give you this virus I have.”

He stopped rubbing a towel over his hair and looked at her. “What virus?”

She turned toward the sink and squirted some leave-in conditioner into her hand. As she worked it into the ends of her hair, she shrugged and met his gaze through his reflection in the mirror. “A stomach bug. Nothing to worry about. I think the stress I’ve been under hasn’t helped either.”

How could she feel so comfortable with him? Although they’d been married for nearly a month, they hadn’t acted much like a married couple. But this morning felt so normal, like they’d always been together. Was he right? Was she sabotaging their love by comparing Gabe with her father? Gabe was nothing like Lemont; so, why did she expect him to do the same things?

“I’m sorry about all this. I never should have been with her.” He came up behind her, wrapped his arms around her, and buried his face into her neck. “But I was at a low point in my life when I met Lydia. I was missing you so bad and needed to forget.” He turned her around and held her face as he searched her gaze with eyes so fierce her heart raced. “I’ve never stopped loving you, Michaela. I met Lydia on what should have been our wedding anniversary. I know that sounds perverse, but… God, I’m sorry.”

The thought that he’d hook up with someone else on a day she usually spent riding the range alone hurt, but how could she truly judge him? Hadn’t the few times she’d had sex since their breakup happened during that same week of July when they should have been celebrating their wedding anniversary? She feathered her fingers into his wet hair. “I forgive you. To be honest. I’ve done the same thing once or twice.”

His eyes narrowed and she felt his body go stiff.

So, he’s jealous. Good.
She didn’t elaborate about her past flings and was glad he didn’t ask her to. “But we do need to figure out what to do about this mess. The adoption hearing is right after Christmas.”

“I think as long as we stay together and show the world we are united we should be okay. I’m not the first celebrity to be accused of fathering a child.” He found his razor in the top drawer of his side of the double-bowl vanity. As he lathered his face with shaving cream, he rinsed the blade in the sink and started to shave. “Next week I’m heading to Vegas for the show I have scheduled to do there during the NFR. I’d like you to be by my side as we’d planned.”

She was having a hard time concentrating on anything but how damned sexy he was standing at the sink shaving with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. To distract herself from watching him, she stood at her side of the vanity and applied her moisturizer. “I planned to be there. I’m having lunch with some of my barrel racing friends.” She glanced at him again. His muscles and sinews moved under his broad shoulder as he stroked the razor over the dark growth on his jaw. She wanted him.

Now and forever.

“Gabe, I do love you. I’ve always loved you.” She set the lotion bottle on the counter and took a step toward him. “You were right about me being afraid of your leaving to chase your dreams all those years ago.”

He wiped his face and turned toward her.

“I’ve always believed in you. You are so talented. It’s not that I didn’t want you to sing. I didn’t want you to go to Nashville because I truly believed you would decide you didn’t want me.” Her sinuses burned. She sniffed and wiped at the offending moisture in her eyes. “So, I pushed you away. I still am afraid you’ll get tired of me.”

She leaned against the countertop and took a deep breath. Was she ready to truly commit to him? He could still leave, which scared her, and her stomach turned over at the emptiness the thought caused her. She laid her hand over her belly and met his gaze again.

“I will never tire of you.” He brushed his warm fingers over her face. “You don’t have to be afraid.”

“It’s hard not to be. But it’s also too hard to fight my feelings. I want a life with you. I may not like some aspects of your fame, but I know how important it is to you.”

“Michaela.” He cupped her face between his big hands and stared so intently into her eyes, she got the impression he was trying to show her his soul. “I’d give it all up if you asked me to.”

His declaration sent a jolt straight to her heart. Could she believe him? “Gabe. I’d never ask you to do that. I know how much you love singing and performing.”

“I do. But I’m not twenty-four any more with something to prove with nothing but the clothes on my back.” His voice rumbled through her and sent a chill up her spine. “I’ve proven myself, and I have more money than I’ll ever spend. But it cost me the most important thing in my life, and I will never choose it over you again.”

He swung her up into his arms and kissed her with a blazing passion that set her on fire. She wrapped her arms around him as he carried her out to the bed where he laid her down and made the sweetest love to her.

Two hours later, they entered the kitchen with Gabe holding her from behind. He’d found her ticklish spots and teased her relentlessly.

“Gabe!” she squealed between peals of giggles as she struggled to escape him. “Stop!”

He stilled in tickling her and held her close from behind. In her ear, he whispered, “I love to hear you laugh. You’re so beautiful, I can’t believe you’re all mine. I’ll love you forever.”

She turned her face to look over her shoulder at him. “Be patient with me. That’s all I can ask. I love you, too.”

He kissed her hard on the lips, but the soft chuckles coming from the doorway of the laundry room had them stepping apart. Flo wiped her hands on a dishtowel and watched them with humor glinting in her dark eyes. “Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. McKenna. I’ll get you your breakfasts.”

Micki cleared her throat and adjusted her blouse that Gabe’s tickling had set askew. “Thank you, Flo.”

“We were wondering if you two were planning on spending the whole day in bed.” At the kitchen table, Momma leaned away from the newspaper she was reading. Her face brightened with a wide grin. “It’s good to see you both finally came to your senses.”

A week later, Micki stood in the wings of the stage at the MGM in Las Vegas watching her husband do what he loved to do. He’d told her earlier that the Garden Arena had sold out at nearly 17,000 people. She’d agreed to go out onto the stage with him for his last song, since most of the people in the audience were in Sin City for the NFR and she had been a rodeo champion. No one had beaten her times since she and Beau set the record two years ago; she was something of a legend, though she hated the idea. Now, the reality of going out on stage with him before all those people made her queasy stomach churn.

Taking a deep breath, she concentrated on settling the twisting snakes in her belly. She started doubting she had a stomach virus two days after Thanksgiving when she realized she’d missed her period. She was two weeks overdue, which for someone who could have set her watch to her monthly cycle only meant one thing. Damn, why had she thought about
that now
? Closing her eyes she focused on Gabe’s voice. First, she had to get through this; then she’d worry about a possible pregnancy. She could do this.

Gabe finished his crowd pleasing, bad-boy song, “One Night Rodeo.”
As the crowd cheered, a stagehand approached her. “Mrs. McKenna. It’s time.”

“Thanks.” She pasted on a smile, stepped out from the shadows, and waved at the crowd. Her focus settled on Gabe’s smiling face, and she made it across the stage without mishap; then he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her close.

He moved his wireless microphone away from his mouth and whispered close to her ear, “You okay?”

She nodded and glanced at the crowd but couldn’t see much except for the bright lights. As she fought the urge to squint, she fixed her smile firmly on her face, measured her breathing, and calmed her skittish nerves. How could Gabe be so comfortable out here? Hell, why on earth did he want to do this?

Micki wasn’t sure she’d ever understand his need to sing in front of people, but she accepted singing gave him the same thrill barrel racing had her for so many years. She missed riding and probably always would. Gabe had mentioned that she could go back to the rodeo, but she hadn’t made any decisions. She still managed the ranch, and her mother still needed her despite Flo’s excellent care. Besides, once they adopted Jesse and if she were pregnant, she’d have a lot to keep her busy.

Gabe jolted her out of her thoughts. “I’d like for you to meet my beautiful and amazing wife, Micki Finn McKenna. Two-time barrel racing champion and holder of the fastest time in the history of the NFR!”

The crowd cheered, and she focused her scattered mind on how wrong his calling her Micki sounded. She’d asked him to introduce her by her rodeo name. No one but Gabe called her Michaela and that’s how she wanted to keep it. Years ago, she’d asked him why he always used her given name, knowing it bothered her that he did. At the time he’d laughed and simply told her it was her name. But last night after they’d made love she asked him again.

He stroked her back as she curled up next to him, resting her head on his shoulder. “I know you don’t like it because Lemont gave you the name, but I call you Michaela because I love your name. It sounds beautiful, and I think it fits you better than Micki. Michaela is a strong name, and you are one of the strongest people I know.” She shifted to meet his gaze, and his glorious smile didn’t fail to dazzle her as it always had. He kissed her softly and feathered her hair off her face. “But mostly I call you Michaela because I’m the only one who ever does, and it’s… Well, as odd as this sounds, think of it like a nickname or an endearment.”

After his admission, Micki never wanted anyone else to ever call her by her given name. He made a name she’d long hated seem special. If she was honest with herself, she’d always loved that he called her by her given name because he made it sound beautiful.

Gabe forced her attention back into the moment when he indicated that she should take a seat on a stool she hadn’t noticed before. She stiffly sat and forced her attention on steady, calming breaths to slow her racing heart and still her churning stomach. Maybe she’d been wrong to agree to Gabe’s crazy idea of bringing her on stage.

“As many of you know, Micki and I were high school sweethearts.” He winked at her and smiled as his fans responded by applause and whistles. As he turned back to them, he reached for his guitar, which rested in a stand next to him. He sat on the stool beside her with the guitar in his lap. “Every love song I’ve ever penned has been about my one true love.”

A new sensation competed with the other ones Micki was trying to calm down. Her sinuses burned with a prickling of tears. Did he really mean this? She knew songs like “Heaven
Tonight
”
had been about her, but all the rest?

He smiled at her. “This song has never been recorded, but I wrote it a long time ago. It’s called ‘Chasin’
Dreams.’ ” He started strumming his guitar, and the band joined in with a melody she’d never heard before. Gabe started singing about wanting to be famous and chasing his dreams, but what caused Micki to finally leave all her doubt behind was when he sang about giving it all up to be with her. Her love was all he ever wanted or needed.

The first tear rolled down her cheek and she quickly brushed it away. Had she been the one who screwed things up the last time? If she’d just trusted Gabe, their pasts would have been so different. She’d never make that mistake again.

“I’ll go on chasin’ my dreams, baby,

But you’re the song in my heart.”

She sniffed as he finished the last words of the song.

Not caring about the thousands of people watching them or that whatever she said would be picked up on his microphone, she leaned forward and smiled. “I love you.”