Heaven Cent (5 page)

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Authors: Piers Anthony

Tags: #Humor, #Fantasy, #Science Fiction, #Young Adult

BOOK: Heaven Cent
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They decided to proceed afoot over the mountain, so that the watching harpies could not intercept them in the air. At least they were across the river!

Except for one thing: Dolph's knapsack with his clothing and supplies was on the far side. He chose not to speak of this inconvenience, because he knew it was pointless to face the harpies again.

Dolph remained in ogre form, because this was a strange region and he believed this form was safer. Hardly anyone in his right mind ever bothered an ogre, and even those in there wrong minds were apt to regret it. There were stories about foolish goblins attacking ogres and getting hurled so far that some were still lost behind the sun, getting terribly hot from its flames. Sometimes a large tangle tree would tackle one; there were still some twisted stumps with their tentacles tied in massive ogre knots. Dolph couldn't do such things, of course, because he wasn't a real ogre, but who else would know that?

He looked around. For a wilderness area, this was amazingly nice. The ground was even under the trees, and there were no bad bramble bushes. They stopped for a drink at a lovely little brook whose water was sparklingly clear. It was like a park—where no park should be.

Dolph lay down and put his ogre snoot to the water. But just then there was a horrendous scream from upstream. Startled, he jumped up, and Marrow cocked an ear hole.

The forest was silent. Dolph shrugged and lay down again, ready to drink—and again the scream sounded, worse than before, and closer. It sounded vaguely female, and less vaguely menacing. But nothing appeared, and the forest was undisturbed.

Dolph decided that he had better get his drink before the thing reached them and attacked, forcing them to fight or flee. A real ogre wouldn't know how to flee, of course, which was apt to make things awkward: if Dolph had to flee, his masquerade would be exposed. He got down a third time and put his ugly ogre puss to the water.

This time the scream was almost on top of them. A huge bear burst into view, its fur wild. “That's my water!” it screamed. “You can't have it! Get out, get out, get out!”

A talking bear? Dolph scrambled back to his feet. An ogre could smash a bear, but he was not a real ogre and hesitated to try violence. So he tried to reason with it. “Me want drink; what he think?” Ogres had trouble with pronouns, so me, he and she were about the number they could manage.

The bear pointed to the brook. Instantly the water turned color, becoming smoky. “You drink, ogre, you die! Now it is poison!”

How could a bear poison a brook without touching it? But the water certainly looked dangerous now!

Marrow poked a bone finger into the water. The bone changed color. “Yes, it is poison,” he said. “This must be a vila in bear form.”

Dolph wanted to ask what a vila was, but to do that he had either to figure out a suitable rhyme, or change to boy form. He couldn't do the first at the moment, and hesitated to do the second while facing a dangerous animal. So he just stood there stupidly, which was easy to do in ogre form.

“Yes, I am Vida Vila, and this is my forest!” the bear said. “You are intruders! No ogres or skeletons allowed here! Get out before I do something to you.”

Vida? That sounded female. But it still sounded vile—or vila, as the case might be.

“We are merely passing through,“ Marrow said. ”My companion only wants one drink; then we shall cross on out of your territory."

“Get out! Get out! Get out!” the bear screamed.

“Well, if you feel that way,” Marrow said. He turned to Dolph. “How do you feel about it?”

Dolph would have been glad to get out. But he didn't want to go back to where the harpies lurked, and he did not want to move straight on to the Isle of Illusion, which was farther in the direction they had been going. Also, he was very thirsty; even the thought of not having a drink made him crave it more. “Me think me drink,” he said.

“You drink, you stink!” the bear screamed. “You'll die and I'll use your corpse for fertilizer for my flowers!”

That notion did not appeal either. Dolph looked at Marrow for help.

“I suspect—” the skeleton began.

“Get out! Get out! Get out!” the bear screamed.

“—that we shall have to chop her tree down,” Marrow concluded.

The bear screamed, the same way as originally, but more so. Evidently Marrow's threat really bothered it. It strode toward the skeleton, but Marrow merely ran uphill, eluding it.

“The tree should be at the top of the mountain,” the skeleton called back to Dolph. “When we find it, I shall assume the configuration of an axe, and you can use me to chop it.”

“You win! You win! You win!” the bear screamed. “Spare my tree!”

Marrow paused. “You will unpoison the water and let my friend Prince Dolph drink safely?”

“Prince Dolph?” the bear asked, amazed.

“Yes. He is on a Quest, and I am his companion. We never did intend any harm to you; we just want to drink and move on.”

The bear disappeared. In its place stood a lovely young woman whose curly reddish-brown hair fell in waves to her feet. Her clothing was fashioned from green leaves magically fastened together. “Why didn't you say so before?” she asked.

“You didn't ask,” Marrow said. He tended to be literal. “Now the water, if you please.”

“Of course.” Vida Vila pointed at the brook, and the water cleared. “Drink all you want, Prince.” But then she frowned. “Are you sure?” she said aside to Marrow. “He doesn't look much like a prince.”

“He's a form changer,” Marrow explained. “For forest travel he assumes the form of an ogre. He can assume another form if you promise not to try to hurt him.”

“I promise!” Vida exclaimed, her hair shimmering in her excitement. “I've always wanted a prince!”

Dolph reverted to boy form. He got down next to the brook. The water certainly seemed good. If Marrow believed it was safe, it surely was; adults had good instincts about such things. He drank deeply, and it was the finest water he had ever tasted.

Then, as he got up, he remembered that he was no longer alone with Marrow. There was a woman present, and he was naked. Now he missed his bag of belongings back on the other side of the river; the situation with the harpies had caused him to forget the problem of nakedness. So he had no clothes to change into anyway. It was too late to change to some other form; she had already seen him. He felt a blush developing.

“You must introduce us,” Vida said to Marrow.

The skeleton shrugged. “Prince Dolph, this is Vida, the vila of this forest. Vida, this is Dolph, the son of King Dor.”

“Uh, glad to meet you,” Dolph said doubtfully, extending his hand. He reminded himself that this was not really a human woman, but some kind of forest creature who could change forms, just as he could. That in itself was surprising, but Vida avoided the hand, stepped in close, and embraced him. Her body was marvelously cushiony. He opened his mouth in surprise, only to have it covered by hers. She gave him a deep kiss that practically smothered him.

“Now wasn't that nice?” she inquired as she let him up for air. “There is much, much more where that came from, after we are married.”

Dolph had been about to close his mouth, but this locked it open. What had she said?

“I fear there has been a misunderstanding,” Marrow said. “Dolph is not—”

“Not interested in marriage yet?” the woman finished. “Well, maybe that is understandable. This is fairly sudden, I confess. I had not been thinking of it either, until I learned his identity. Suppose I remove my clothing?”

“I—” Dolph began.

The leaves shimmered on her torso, and faded out. Now she was a voluptuous naked nymph whose hair played about her ample curves. “Now isn't this a body fit for a prince?” she inquired. “I assure you, it's fully functional, for it is my natural form. Now if you will just assume your own natural form so that you can react in manly fashion, I'm sure you will be satisfied.”

“But—” Dolph said.

“Let me encourage you,” Vida said. “I normally don't give samples before marriage, but in this case I can make an exception. Just let me get really close to you—” As she spoke, she took him in her arms again, this time lifting him off his feet and bearing him down to the ground so that she could wrap her legs around him as well as her arms. “Now change, Prince,” she whispered huskily. “I am ready for you!”

“Help!” Dolph cried.

Marrow stepped in. “This is his natural form,” he informed the vila. “Dolph is a young prince, just nine years old. He is not ready for marriage.”

It took a moment for that to sink in, for Vida was in the process of capturing Dolph's mourn for another thorough kiss. “How old?” she asked.

“Nine!” Dolph answered.

She pondered. “Well, maybe in a few more years.” She released him. “Too bad; I have so much to offer right now.”

“Indubitably the case,” Marrow agreed smoothly. “We regret the confusion.”

“So you are a child,” Vida said, readjusting. “We vila are very protective toward children. Come, you must eat; a growing boy needs nourishment.”

“Uh—”

“And you really shouldn't be going around without clothing; you'll catch your death of a cold!” She made a gesture with her hands, and suddenly Dolph was wearing a cloak of green leaves.

“Perhaps some food would be good for him,” Marrow agreed.

“Yes.” A huge green salad appeared in her hands. “Now eat it all, and brush your teeth after,” she admonished Dolph. “Then you will have to wash up, especially behind the ears.”

It occurred to Dolph that he might have been better off as a man. Her wrestling would have been more fun than this salad! Now she was acting just like a mother.

But it seemed he was stuck for it, because Marrow, though he did not have to eat himself, knew that living folk had to do it. Like so many adults, Marrow thought that yucky salad was better than candy corn on the cob.

But it wasn't all bad. After the meal, Vida changed into a fine big horse so that Dolph could ride in style, and carried him up the mountain to her tree. This was a huge old beech, with white sand all around it and the sound of ocean breakers in its branches. She invited them to spend the night here, and Marrow approved. “No one bothers anyone under the protection of a vila,” Marrow said.

They talked, for Vida was eager to impress Dolph with her virtue as a prospective bride, for the time when he should be ready for one. He learned that the vily were the guardians of mountain forests, like hamadryads, only far more powerful. They could assume a number of forms, and could cause and cure illness in those who intruded on their forests. That was why the harpies had stopped at the border; they feared the local vila. But this power came at a price: the vily were forever tied to their trees, and if the tree died, so did its vila. Thus Marrow's threat to cut down her tree had completely unnerved her; she could have made a living creature sicken and die before ever reaching her tree, but Marrow was not alive in that sense. A vila could wander far from her tree, and remain away from it as long as she wished, unlike the hamadryad who had to stay quite close. But if Vida wandered too far, someone might sneak in and harm her tree, and she could not afford to risk that. So she maintained a nice forest as far out as she deemed proper, and that was it. She was sorry to have threatened Dolph, but he had looked just like an ogre, and ogres were notorious for damaging trees. Had she known at the outset that he was a prince—

“You know, it is true that you are young,” she said, thinking of something. “But perhaps if you assumed the form of a grown man, we could do something interesting together.”

“Oh? What?” Dolph asked, intrigued.- He had never been able to assume the form of anything older than himself, but this talent improved as he grew, so maybe he could be a man now.

“I think not,” Marrow said quickly.

“But—” Dolph and Vida said together.

“She is not thinking of wrestling or handball,” the skeleton explained. “She is thinking of mushy stuff.”

“Ugh!” Dolph exclaimed, appalled.

“Well, perhaps wrestling—” Vida said.

But Dolph demurred. He did not trust her not to throw in a kiss. He was glad Marrow had warned him. Adults simply were not to be trusted.

Vida sighed. “Well, when you do get interested in mush, Prince, you will know where to find me. I will be glad to show you varieties of mush you never dreamed of, and that's a promise.”

Promise? Dolph was onto that kind of language. It meant a threat. He would never fall for it!

In the morning she made him eat a big bowl of mush, getting even with him for being young (or whatever), and resumed horse form to carry him to the coast. Dolph kicked Marrow, who became a bone blanket that Dolph wrapped around his body for warmth.

First they went back to the river to recover the lost bag. They were lucky; the harpies had not thought to look for that, and it was still sitting by the bank. Dolph became a buzzard, found that his wing soreness had eased, and flew across to fetch the bag back. Then he reverted to boy form, dressed, and the horse carried them back over the mountain and on to the east. It was indeed a nice way to travel!

Dusk was looming as they reached the shore. “I really would like to stay the night with you,” the horse said. ”But I fear for my tree. Unless you would like to—"

“In a few years,” Dolph said. It wasn't right to fib, he knew, but he didn't think it was wise to tell her the truth: that he would never be interested in mush no matter how fancy she made it. With luck, he would not encounter her again.

“Just so.” The horse became a hawk, which flew swiftly back west.

“How can she change forms, the way I can, but she's not a Magician?” Dolph asked. “Also, how can she do different kinds of magic? I thought each person could have only one magic talent.”

“She is not a person, she is a vila,” Marrow explained, “a magical creature whose natural form only happens to be human. You have noted that I can do a number of magical things related to my body; similarly she can do a number of things related to her nature. These are not multiple talents but aspects of her single talent: to protect her tree. She protects it, and it sustains her, giving her life as long as it lives.”

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