Heaven Scent (17 page)

Rafe’s own hand in her hair soothed
Tarin. “So he did do some good, after all.”

Nodding, she gave him a small smile. “I
often wonder why. Why her? Why at that time?” Tarin had always
wanted someone to answer that question. She wanted to know why her
sweet, mild-mannered mother had to die rather than the mean,
vile-tempered nurse they had hired to care of her.

“God, Tarin. If you only knew how many
times I’ve asked myself that very question. How many times I‘ve
been where you are now, wishing I could‘ve done more. Wishing it
would‘ve been me instead.”

Tarin nodded, her hair scratching
against the linen of his shirt sleeve. It had broken her heart to
see her father suffer afterwards. So many times she had wished she
would have died instead so her father could have lived
happy.

“Watching her suffer so, day after day,
tore at my heart," Tarin said. "To see her deteriorate right before
my eyes was a torture I wish for no one.”

Nodding, Rafe glanced away, his eyes
dark and troubled once again. “Back in Texas, I saw so much
suffering, Tarin. Shocking brutality I thought no human could ever
commit. Each day when I convinced myself I had seen it all,
something happened the next day to top it.” He kissed her forehead.
“By the time I left, I hated Texas. I had seen so much torture and
death, I never wanted to see it again.”

Now Tarin understood the pain she had
seen in his eyes that day at the park. She also understood his
relaxed confidence, his appreciation for the simple things in life.
Rafe deserved happiness, deserved peace. She wanted to make it
happen for him.

“I’m so sorry, Rafe.”

Turning back to her, his eyes were big,
somber. “Me, too.” He ran a finger along her hairline to brush back
a stray strand. She shivered at the delicate heat on her
skin.

Sitting in his lap with her arms
wrapped around his middle, Tarin smiled up at Rafe
tentatively.

“Tarin, you talk of saving lives as a
doctor, but what about those that you can’t save? You will be a
trained professional, not an eight-year-old girl. Will you get
upset each time you lose a patient? Are you ready for the
responsibility of another human life?”

She sat up straight. “Of course, I will
get upset. It is not as if I would lose a book or, or
currency.”

Clutching her face in both hands, Rafe
looked down into her eyes. “All I’m saying is that if this is just
about your mother, Tarin, you really need to think about what
you’re doing. Becoming a doctor won’t change anything in that
regard. It’s a lot of responsibility and comes with high
expectations.”

He brushed the hair back from her
temple, his fingers gentle against her skin. “But if that’s what
you truly want to do, what you want out of life…” he searched her
gaze, “I will stand beside you every step of the way.”

Tears filled Tarin’s eyes once again.
For someone who rarely cried, she had made up for lost time that
afternoon. She cried not because it upset her to hear Rafe’s
concerns, but because she knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that
she loved Rafe Sutherland. And it terrified her.

“I’m sorry to upset you, sweetheart,”
he said, brushing a tear from her cheek, “but this quest you’re on
shouldn’t be taken lightly.”

“Lightly?” she cried, scrambling out of
his arms and onto the sofa. She had to get away from him to think
straight. “I have planned for this all of my life. Do you not think
I’ve considered this from all angles? I am not an imbecile,
Rafe.”

Rising to his feet, Rafe frowned down
at her, hands on hips. “Tarin, you’re an incredibly intelligent
woman. I never meant to imply otherwise. I just want you to be sure
of what you want.”

I want you, Rafe, above all
else.

Good God, what had she done?

Jumping up from the sofa, she turned
her back on him. “I think it best you leave.”

Silence.

“Tarin, I never meant to hurt
you...”

She nodded, tears lodged in her throat.
She swallowed hard.

“I hope you enjoy the
books.”

She heard him walk towards the door.
Something she didn’t want to acknowledge prompted her to
run.“Rafe...”

Throwing her arms around his neck, she
kissed him as though she’d never see him again. Open-mouthed and
fierce, Tarin’s kiss relayed all of the mixed feelings she had
inside. She clung to him, desperate that he tell her everything
would work out. That she could love him and not get hurt. That he
would always be there for her and never leave.

But she knew better.

Moaning, Rafe pulled her off her feet.
He held her tight, his arms like bands of iron. He kissed her
ardently, with a force that felt as if he would swallow her
whole.

“Tarin,” he said, pulling away, his
breathing heavy, “I can’t take much more of this. Say yes and put
us both out of our misery.”

She stared at the buttons on his vest
but said nothing. How could she say yes to something that could
destroy her?

Blowing out a breath, Rafe released
her. She dropped to her feet.

“Dammit, Tarin. You kiss me like we’re
married but I can’t even get you to say yes to
courtship.”

She sighed. “You are right. I cannot do
this any longer.”

Turning away, Rafe shoved a hand
through his hair then rubbed the back of his neck.

“
I’m sorry,
Rafe.”

Cursing low, he straightened his
shoulders and headed for the door.

“You may take back your
gift.”

He shook his head. “What would I do
with a medical library - without you?”

He walked out of the parlor, leaving
his picnic on the floor and taking her heart with him.

Dropping to the sofa, Tarin put her
face in her hands and cried.

Chapter 10

Rafe was still trying to figure out how
he went from “it’s good to see you” to “I think it best you leave”
as he steered the carriage south on Chestnut Street, taking the
long route home.

It was no wonder Tarin hadn’t found an
eligible man to her liking. The Good Lord above was trying to
protect the sanity of the male population in Boston.

Leave it to Rafe to go against the
grain.

Dammit, how could she kiss him like
that, then tell him goodbye? He didn’t know how much of this
masochistic torture he could take. Maybe he should start searching
for that blind whore.

He sighed. It wouldn’t do any good. He
hungered for Tarin and no other.

For some unknown reason, she was
attracted to him. That much he knew. Why she fought it, he wasn’t
certain. But fight it she did - with everything she had.

It had killed him to see her so upset
about her mother. Tarin crying was something akin to having bamboo
shoots stuck under his fingernails. Today, unlike that past
experience, he came out of it on the losing end.

Wiping a trickle of sweat from his
brow, Rafe thought about the circumstances of his agreement with
Worthington. Get his daughter to marry him and Rafe had instant
success for the rest of his life. He laughed to himself.
Worthington was a shrewd bastard. He knew how difficult his
daughter could be.

Worthington. Was he in business with a
man that wanted to destroy Sutherland Shipping? Were he and Kent in
a plot together so they could, in turn, buy the business? If they
weren’t in business together, why would Kent interfere with
Worthington’s shipments?

Blowing out a frustrated breath, Rafe
waved at a police officer as he rounded the corner. Suppose Kent
wasn’t in business with Worthington. Was Kent stealing his goods?
If so, was Hunter, or his crewmen, in with him? Otherwise, how
could Kent gain access to the ship without Hunter’s
knowledge?

Rafe turned onto his street. He needed
to take Ruthless out on a long jaunt. He always thought better on
the back of his horse. The poor beast probably wondered what had
happened to the wide open spaces of Texas.

Pulling to a stop at the
front steps, Rafe jumped down and handed the reins to the stable
hand. He would figure out a way to get Tarin Worthington to marry
him. He had no choice now. She had stirred up his blood so that no
other woman would do. The question was, what would he do when
he
did
get her
into his bed?

Hell, things couldn’t get any worse,
Rafe decided. His business was on its last leg, his family - no
both of his families - were nearly out of money, he was in a
blackmail scheme with a man that could be trying to destroy him,
the most highly respected doctor in town wanted the same woman as
he, and that woman just told him she couldn’t see him
anymore.

Oh, and he couldn’t forget that should
he somehow get the woman, he would quickly lose her anyway because
his scars were the most grotesque sight imaginable.

And he had wanted to return to Boston,
for what reason?

Rafe laughed to himself as he opened
the front door. Things could only get better, right?

A squeal rang from the parlor. Rafe
whipped his head around only to be pulled into a blistering
kiss.

The womanly curves crushed against him
weren’t Tarin’s curves, that much he knew, but they felt oddly
familiar.

And wrong.

He shoved the woman to arm’s length.
Long, black hair swept back from a face of smooth, cream-colored
skin. Eyes the color of whiskey sparkled up at him. She was
beautiful, wild, and the last person he expected to see.

“Rosa!” He couldn‘t have been more
shocked to see someone if his deceased father stood before
him.

“Rafe oh, mi amor,” she
clutched his face between her hands, “
me
ha olvidado usted de manera
.”

The
mi amor
- my love - part registered,
but Rafe refused to acknowledge it. Even if she hadn’t said the
words, the light in her eyes would have spoken for her. “What are
you doing here?”

“I brought her.”

Rafe stilled. He knew that voice.
Looking into the parlor doorway, he saw his friend and former
Ranger, Beau St. John, standing beside his blushing mother. Patrick
stood nearby, his angry face the shade of beets.

Damned Frenchman hadn’t changed a bit.
He was still the prettiest man Rafe had ever seen - and the biggest
flirt. The ladies flocked to him like bees to honey.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in…”
Rafe couldn’t keep the smile from his face.

Pulling his friend into a brief
embrace, Rafe clapped him on the shoulder with a laugh. “Damn...
it’s good to see you. What are you doing here?”

Beau tugged at the bottom of his vest
and straightened his cuffs. “Taylor asked me to join his personal
guard in Washington. I was traveling north, so Rosa asked me to
bring her to Boston.” He frowned over glittering ice-green eyes,
“Since she had no reason to stay in Texas.”

Rafe frowned. “What?” He looked down at
Rosa beside him. “What happened?”

Tears appeared in her eyes. “My
familia, the Comanches killed them.”

Rafe clutched her arm before Isabel
placed an arm around her shoulders. She led Rosa to one of the
settees and sat down. The men followed them into the
room.

“After you left,” Beau said, his arms
linked behind his back as he strolled to the fireplace, “the
Comanches came in and massacred nearly everyone at the
mission.”

Rafe’s gut twisted. Rosa’s family and
the residents of the mission were responsible for saving him that
night. Damn, why was he allowed to live and good people like the
Mendoza family were killed?

Then it struck him - was he the cause?
Did the Indians return to finish the job?

Shaking his head, Beau added, “Before
you go thinking this was your fault, more of the Rangers had ridden
in to see you before you left. The Comanches heard about it and…”
He glanced down at the women without finishing.

Rafe glanced down at Rosa again. “Rosa,
I’m sorry.”

She squeezed his hand. “I am just happy
you are alive.”

“You should have seen her, Rafe.” Beau
gave a quick grin as he winked at Isabel.

His mother blushed and ducked her head.
Patrick growled low in his throat.

“Rosa was a vision of fierce resolve -
I think Taylor would have hired her too, if he were
able.”

Knowing Beau’s interpretation meant she
had killed as many as the Rangers had, Rafe smiled down at her. Who
would‘ve ever thought a woman of such beauty capable of
killing?

Patrick stepped towards him. “Rafe, we
have to leave if we are going to meet with McAllister.”

Rafe nodded. Yes, after all he had been
through that day, he still had a business to run.

The women stood as the men walked to
the door.

“I’ve asked Cook to prepare a grand
meal this evening,” Isabel said. “We will celebrate your arrival in
Boston.” She glanced first at Beau, looking away quickly before
turning to Rosa.